AN: Happy New Year's everybody!
Replies
HPBirdBrain. . . . Thanks! I'll be doing the whole story!
tdwtrulz1022. . . . omg me too! I made a complete fool of myself in the theater crying, but come on! This is Snape we're talking about, he was boss!
Startled Boris. . . . Thank you! I'm just trying to make reading Tara's awful creation a little more bearable with some funny commentary lol
SokkasFirstFanGirl. . . . lol I love the Simpsons. I always think of the Dave Chapel show where he's like "I'M RICK JAMES, BITCH!" Both always crack me up!
Crissi Grigori. . . . I love writing Sirius! He's so fun to write, especially in this story.
XxBellatrixLestrangexX. . . . Voldemort is even more fun to write, because he's completely OOC lol
...
AN: I SED STUP FLAMMING!
Snape: You would think that by now she would realize that this story will NEVER cease to be flamed.
if u do den ur a fuken prep! fangz 2 raven 4 da help n stuf. u rok! n ur nut a prep. fangz for muh sewter!
Sirius: (hand over his heart) Oh, thank heaven above Raven gave her her sweater back! Wow, Tara, you had me in suspense there, girl!
ps da oder eson dumbeldor swor is koz he trin 2 be gofik so der!
Dumbledore: There she goes trying to justify my potty mouth AGAIN.
I woke up the next day in my coffin.
Draco: With pink lining.
I walked out of it and put on some black eyeliner, black eyesharrow,blood-bed lipstick and a black really low-cut leather dress that was all ripped and in stripes so you could see my belly.
Sirius: Why is it that all of her shit is ripped?
Hermione: Why can she not just go out in sweat pants or jeans and a t-shirt once in a while? No one wears leather THAT often. Terribly uncomfortable, you know?
Snape: I do know. I wear it constantly when I go partying.
Everyone: ?
Snape: What?
I was wearing a skull belly ring with black and red diamonds inside it. Da night before Draco and I rent back to the skull (geddit skull koz im goffik n I like deth)
Harry: WOULD YOU STOP IT WITH THE PUNS?
Voldemort: Seriously, you don't insert jokes into your story text. That's unprofessional.
McGonagall: What? If this all happened last night, why didn't you go over any of this in the last chapter?
Remus: You can't just gloss over all the details! That's lazy!
Dumbeldore chased Vlodemort away. We flew there on our brooms. Mine was black and the broom-stuffwas blood-red.
Draco: NO ONE GIVES HERMIONE'S RIGHT TIT WHAT YOUR BROOM LOOKED LIKE.
Hermione: Thanks.
Dobby: Broom-stuff? Dobby thought it was called bristle.
There was lace all over it. Draco had a black MCR boom.
Draco: Are there really official My Chemical Romance brooms?
We went back to our rooms and we had you-know-what to a Linkin Park song.
Remus: Come to think of it, I'm glad she didn't include any details.
Voldemort: YAY! MORE FUCKY-FUCKY TIME!
Sirius: SEX! YOU HAD SEX! IF YOU'RE GOING TO INCLUDE SEXUAL ACTIVITY, YOU CAN'T PUSSY OUT WHEN IT COMES TO DESCRIBING IT! IT'S CHILDISH AND STUPID. IF YOU CAN'T GO ALL THE WAY, DON'T DO IT AT ALL! Wow, that sounded less dirty in my mind...
Well anyway I went down to the Grate Hall. There all da walls were painted black and da tables were black too.
Snape: She even fucked up the Great Hall with goffic-ness...
Dobby: No body is safe...
But you fould see that there was pink pant underneath the black pant.
Snape: Ah, the "preps" where wearing pink under their black pants? Those damned posers.
And there were pastors of poser bands everywhere,
Dumbledore: Does she mean posters?
like Ashlee Simpson and the Backstreet Boys.
McGonagall: Hogwarts does not allow muggle decorations in the Great Hall!
"WTF!" I shouted going to sit next to B'loody Mary and Willow. B'loody Mary was wearing a black leather mini with a Good Chraloote t-shirt, black fishnetsand black pointy boots.
Dobby: Dobby can see why Ebony is upset. This story is about the persecution of gothic people and their beliefs, and the preps trying to control them, when in reality, the preps wish they could be gothic, but everyone knows that naturally, humans fear that which is different, resulting in unjustifiable crimes against the strange. Quite sad really.
Everyone: (stare)
Dobby:(tries to keep a straight face but bursts out laughing) Dobby totally just pulled that analysis out of his arse! This story sucks unicorn poo-poo.
Everyone: Lmfao
Willow was wearing a long gothic blak dress with blood red writing that was all lacy and came up to your thighs and black boots and fishnets.
Sirius: Oh my God...no one. gives.A FUCK.
Vampire, Dracula and Draco came. We started to talk about who was sexier, Mikey or Gerard Way or Billie Joe Armstrong. The boys joined in cause they were bi.
Sirius: UGHHHH! WHAT THE F*$%?
Remus: Woah, dude, I think you need a break.
"Those guys are so fucking hot." Navel was saying
as suddenly a gothic old man with a black beard and everything came. He was the same one who had chassed away Vlodemort yesterday.
Dumbledore: F*$%!
He had normal tan skin
Ron: Since when does Dumbledore have a tan?
but he was wearing white foundation
Snape: (sing-songy) Albus wears makeup
Dumbledore: (twitching with anger)
and he had died his hare black.
Dumbledore: At least I have a cute little pet rabbit in this story.
"….DUMBLEDORE?1!" we all gasped.
Dumbledore: OH MY GOODNESS! PRAISE JESUS! PRAISE ALLAH! PRAISE BUDDHA! PRAISE...ALL OF YOU! HALLELIJAH! SHE SPELLED MY NAME CORRECTLY! THIS CALLS FOR CELEBRATION!
Everyone: (applause)
"WTF?" I shouted angrily. "I thought he was just wearing that to scare Volsemort!"
Dumbledore: Nope. I'm goffic for good.
Hermione: (snicker) Volsemort?
Voldemort: F*$%!
Sirius: Holy crap! It's a chain of bleeped out fucks!
"Hello everyone." he said happily. "As u can see I gave the room a makeover. Whjat do u fink about it?"
Harry: I fink she should have abanoned this story right here.
Everyone from the poser table in Gryiffindoor started to cheer.
Harry Ron Hermione Sirius Remus: SCREW YOU, TARA.
Snape: Yes, how dare she insult Gryfinndoor! (troll face)
Draco: Tee hee! High five!
Snape: Go away.
Draco: Aww...
InuyashaFanGirl555:(Suddenly appears out of thin air)
Everyone: HOW DID YOU DO THAT?
InuyashaFanGirl555: Never mind.Sorry to interrupt, but I think we should start keeping track of how many times Draco gets owned.
Sirius: Oooh! Oooh! I'll be the ownage point keeper! Lets see...(counts on his fingers)1...2...3...If my calculations are correct, he's been owned 21 times.
Draco: You're all so mean to me...what did I ever do to-wait! Don't answer that.
Sirius: Can I keep track of bleeped out fucks too? Because, let's be honest, theres bound to be s lot.
InuyashaFanGirl555: What?
Sirius: When a character gets really mad and they scream FUCK but it gets bleeped out.
InuyashaFangirl555: What's the difference between a normal fuck and a bleeped out fuck?
Sirius: A bleeped out fuck is usually a lone, screamed out fuck, and bleeped out because it's funnier that way.
InuyashaFanGirl555: Oh, I see...It is funnier...
Snape: You're both insane.
Sirius: so, can I?
InuyashaFanGirl555: Sure, knock yourself out. InuyashaFanGirl555 out!(snaps fingers in a "z "formation and disappears)
Harry: I bet she got that from "I Dream of Jeanie" or "Bewitched"
Everyone: Oh...
Well we goths just looked at each other all disfusted and shook our heads.
Ron: (snicker) Disfusted...thats a funny word...
We couldn't believe what a poser he was!1.
"BTWyou can call me Albert."
Dumbledore: My name is Albus!
HE CALLED AS WE LEFT to our classes.
"What a fucking poser!" Draco shouted angrily as we we to were holding hands. Vampire looked really jealous.
Harry: Oh, yes. I'm a jealous wreck. So jealous, I may start goffically crying blood
I could see him crying blood in a gothic way (geddit, way lik Gerard)
Harry: Aww, wtf?
but I didn't say anything.
"I bet he's havin a mid-life crisis!" Willow shouted.
Hermione: Who? Harry, or Dumbledore? Harry isn't middle aged, nor is Dumbledore.
Draco: Yeah, no shit.
Dumbledore: 50 points from Slytherin for calling me old.
Draco: F*$%!
Sirius: Bleeped Fuck number 4, and Draco owned number 22.
Draco: F*$%!
Sirius:Bleeped Fuck number 5.
Draco: STOP IT!
I was so fucking angry.
Harry: I imagine her turning into the Hulk and sreaming "I'M SO FUCKING ANGRY!"