Some Lovers

A 100 prompts challenge on Fenris/LadyHawke by Marianne Bennet

010: Broken

"What a curious lad. The chains are broken but are you truly free?"

"You see much."

Yes, the witch had seen much and her words continued to gnaw away at the corners of Fenris's mind. Yes, he was free but still Fenris continued to think on Danarius constantly, worrying about hunters and wondering when the magister would come after him personally or if he would even do so much. Maybe Danarius did not feel the need to bestir himself from his palace in Minrathous. It did not require the power of a great magister to retrieve a corpse and yet Danarius must be aware that Fenris had dispatched all of his hunters with brutal efficiency. So why send more? Did Danarius know of Fenris's doubts, expect his former slave to come back to Tevinter for his revenge? Was all of this merely more bait except of a different and more insidious intent?

Many times Fenris tried to put these thoughts from his mind and, when sheer willpower was not enough, strong drink made up the difference. He did not like to think of Danarius; it was too reminiscent of the attitude of a slave, to put all thoughts aside save those pertaining to his master. Often, there was enough going on in the present to keep his thoughts from lingering on the past but sometimes it was more difficult. On nights like these, when there was no sound but the pounding of rain on the abandoned mansion's rooftop, he succumbed to weakness and raided the wine cellar.

Think of Hawke instead. If he wished to keep his mind from his old master, think of Hawke whom he had met less than a fortnight ago. The Fereldan apostate with talents that would be admired in Tevinter; had there ever been a better study in contrasts? He felt his lips curl again at the memory of the place he despised more than any other. But she could not be blamed for it any more than she could not be blamed for being born with magic. And he should know better than anyone that one cannot always chose one's abilities.

She had agreed to help him after little thought on the matter, considering that he had been asking her to help him in an assault on a powerful mage's mansion. Granted, she had not yet known of Fenris's feelings on mages… and he had not known that she was one. Might that have changed matters? Perhaps.

And then when all was said and done and Danarius turned out to be gone, she had followed him back into the house, split a bottle of vintage, and laughed at him. The glass fragments of the shattered Aggregio were still lying beside the wall; he should probably pick the shards up before the entire floor became permanently sticky with spilled wine. Or maybe he could leave it for now; think some more instead.

She had laughed at him and then she had made him laugh with her. What did that mean? Maker knew he did not smile very often let alone laugh. How did she do that? And he had called her… "capable." And she had called him "handsome." Had she called him handsome? Why would she do that? Had she been laughing at him again? He couldn't blame her for it.

The wind was howling outside; the rain coming down in buckets. Fenris wondered how the ships in Kirkwall's harbor were faring. He wondered what Hawke was doing, if any of the various jobs she had taken on could be completed in the rain. Why was he wondering about that? He was indebted to her; nothing more. He wondered if the streets ever flooded over in Lowtown. Why did he care? Debt meant a great deal of things but it did not necessarily mean that he should worry over her. Was that what he was doing? Worrying? Fenris did not like the sound of the word.

The noise of a fist pounding emanated from the front door. Fenris had been sitting on the grand staircase, nursing a second bottle of Aggregio. Curious, he went down the steps to answer and was greeted first by a face full of rain and then– "Hawke. What are you doing here?"

"It's raining," she replied, stating the obvious as her particular brand of humor often went. "We were at the Chantry. Can we come in?"

She was not alone; accompanying her was her brother, the dwarf he knew as Varric, and a man whose face he did not know at all. Fenris took a closer look at them all. "Is that…"

Blood, smeared across her nose and all down the front of the unknown man's coat, not quite washed away by the rain. "Never mind," Fenris cut himself off and stepped to the side to allow them all to pass.

"Thank you," said Hawke and then she led the way to an adjoining room that had once been a library where she took a seat beside an empty fireplace. Carver, Varric, and the man joined her; Fenris lingered by the doorway, unsure of what to do now that he had offered his residence as sanctuary against the elements.

He was mostly ignored. For all that he had been thinking of her, Hawke seemed to have thought little of him. Laying her cloak out to dry beside a nonexistent fire, she spoke in a quiet and urgent voice: "Do you think the templars will be after us?"

"Doubtless they will be now," answered Carver crossly. "Why did we agree to get involved in this again?"

"Do you want your deep roads expedition or not?" his sister replied coolly. Carver was silent.

"If it's any comfort, they've been hunting me for years," offered the man Fenris didn't know. "But then I thought I already knew what the templars were capable of. I never would have imagined…" His voice faltered. Instead of finishing his thought, he lifted a hand and lit the slightly damp fireplace.

So this was another mage then and apparently arrogant, reckless, and already putting them all at risk. And Hawke had taken him into Fenris's mansion. Was she trying to provoke him?

"Back at the Chantry…" the new mage continued, staring into the fire. "You should understand what happened there. What I did."

"Let me guess," replied Carver. "This is the part where you tell us you're an abomination?"

The mage was quiet. He said nothing to contradict Hawke's brother, not at first. Fenris felt his fists tighten. No. it seemed he would never be truly free.

…

A/N: I loved getting into Fenris's mind with this piece and I hope you all enjoyed it. I always pictured Hawke and Company using Fenris's mansion as a kind of safe house, particularly during Act 1. Please review if you enjoyed it!