He hadn't gone home that night. All he could think of was what had happened between himself and Sahira just before she had left. He been trying to figure out what he would do, should he talk to her? Should he leave it? He didn't even know if anything had happened or, if he had just made it up? He had been sitting there, alone, in his office since he had seen Sahira drive away from the stair well. Henrik was vaguely aware that he had a shift starting in just under half an hour but, try as he might, he just couldn't gather either the physical nor mental strength to get up and begin to at least try and get himself looking semi presentable. He generally couldn't care less about other people's opinions or how they saw him but today, for some reason or another he just felt that he might have another chance with Sahira after last night but, she was too good for him. After all, who would choose him over the young and flirty Mr Douglas? He had seen his countless attempts at flirting with Sahira very nearly every time he went down to Darwin ward. Sometimes she would laugh and chat back but he could see, or at least he thought he could see, a hint of annoyance in her eyes. He always remembered her one day storming into theatre and stating that she thought he was the only man that respected her for who she was as a person and actually looked into her eyes rather than at the rest of her body, this angry outburst was one of many that she had expressed after Greg had been pestering her all day.
His thoughts were interrupted by a soft hand on his shoulder. "Are you ok Henrik" Sahira asked him softly, her dark eyes bearing into his. "I thought that I'd just pop by too check… anyway I brought you a sandwich." She said, "I figured that chances are you wouldn't have any time for dinner... or supper… or probably breakfast either." She concluded. There was definitely a hint of worry and indeed frustration in her voice. She frequently told him that he was far too skinny and she had made several attempts at trying to make him eat more despite him being adamant that he was perfectly alright, she worried about him. "It's your lucky day too," she continued, "the canteen said that they would take out the little red devils for you." At this he smiled, fondly. She never seemed to forget anything that he had said to him.
"Thank you Miss Shah." He said, still smiling. He was still slightly confused as to what had happened. To anyone else, a small hug would be nothing but to him; feeling Sahira's sleek body pressed against his was almost too much for him to bear.
She seemingly saw straight into his head and read his mind. She saw that he was so very confused about their embrace the night before, she saw that he was still so raw from all those years of both physical and it seemed, mental abuse, and she was that most off all he desperately needed an answer and, she thought that maybe she saw a hint of love in his eyes. Still though, how on earth could he love her after all she had put him through? "Listen, Henrik, about last night. I want you to know that no-matter what happens or indeed happened I will first and foremost be your friend and I want you to always, always remember that." She decided that she needn't tell him any more of her feelings for him, the last thing he needed right now was her adding to his worries. Satisfied that she had at least half answered his questions, she continued, "I also want to remember that we will be operating on, on your, on Kristian this afternoon, are, are you sure that you are still ok to operate?"
To her surprise, Henrik abruptly got up and stalked over to the window. She knew from past experiences that he was hiding his thoughts from her, again. She slowly walked up to him and tried desperately to work out what was wrong. All he could see were her warm eyes, slowly breaking down his defences. All she could see were his guarded eyes, daring her to pry any further. He had clammed up and, try as she might she couldn't get him to open up to her again. After ten minutes of trying Sahira finally admitted defeat and as she turned to leave, Sahira could swear that she heard a small sob break his lips.
As soon as he heard his heavy office door shut, the tears began to flow and no matter what he did, he just couldn't seem to stop all those memories come flooding back. He knew that Sahira meant well and, to be honest with himself, Henrik knew that no matter what it was she wanted or what she said he could never lie to her. But, truth be told, everything she did or said at the moment brought back more and more memories of his past and more and more confusion as to what the hell was happening and all of those memories were slowly but surely tearing him apart.
The day went on and though neither knew, all Sahira and Henrik could think about, was each other. The relatively short shift just seemed to be dragging on forever and after what seemed like a decade the pair both slowly but surely made their way over to Darwin two for the operation on Kristian Hanssen. Both were incredibly nervous if for different reasons. Sahira, because after this morning's brief meeting she still had no idea if Henrik was still in one of his I won't tell you and you don't need to know moods, after all she knew that if she or anyone else had bothered him in that state then everyone it theatre was in store for one hell of a ride. Henrik however was uncharacteristically nervous because, even though he hadn't heard hide or hare of him for years, Kristian was still family and the last thing he wanted or needed at the current moment in time was having to explain how he had killed his half-brother to what little he had left of a family. This of course combined with the fact he would be operating with Sahira, it was always more difficult to pretend with her especially now she knew.
It wasn't long before they both arrived to scrub up. The silence that occurred was enough to make anyone tense, let alone two people who were already racked with nerves. It was for this reason that Sahira decided to break it, "how was the sandwich?" she asked. At that precise moment in time and for a reason unbeknown to both people, this statement seemed hilarious and so was followed by fits of uncontrollable hysterics that lasted for several minutes before finally coming to a halt. To Sahira, it was so nice to see him relax again. He had been even more pedantic and up tight than usual since the arrival of Kristian and it was slowly tearing both her and him apart. He only seemed to ever relax with her, no one else even got close to seeing the amazing and caring person that he really was. "I love it when you're yourself again Henrik," she said in her slightly delirious state. The second that the sentence left her lips she knew that it had been a mistake. He began to retreat back in to his shell one again, "I didn't mean it in a bad way Henrik, quite the opposite in fact, and I love it when you are yourself again, like before. Don't you remember?" Sahira knew from the look that she received that he did indeed remember everything, everything before things went wrong. She daren't say anymore, even she knew that she'd gone far too far this time. Sahira couldn't bear to leave it and go into theatre with all of those memories hanging over both of them, this was why, for the second time in less than twenty four hours, she let her feelings take over and enfolded him into a tight and loving embrace. Then he pulled her in, if possible even tighter and placed a gentle kiss on her head. The emotions that he felt were so very overwhelming; all he could manage say to her was, "Jag kommer alltid älska dig."