Beginning of the End
According to the Mayan calendar, its 12th cycle would set to end on 21 December 2012. This is often interpreted as the end of the world. Whether or not there is any truth to it, it remains as something to be seen in due time…
Meanwhile, the Nations of the world have gathered yet again for another important World Conference. As usual, America took the lead in the Conference.
"Everyone, as you know, it will be the year 2012 very soon!" America exclaimed, "do you know what this means?"
"The London Olympics," England replied, "thank you for advertising…"
"Who cares about you when the world's ending!" America exclaimed, now in hysteria, "according to the Mayan calendar, the world will end on 21st December 2012! We gotta do something NOW!"
"And what would you propose?" asked Russia.
"Did you even watch that movie called 2012?" America cried, "China, I order you to build us giant ships in your backyard! It will be like the Book of Genesis."
"我不是你的阿四！！！" yelled China, "and it is impossible, even for me and my one-billion people."
"Should we migrate our populations into Africa?" wondered America, "the movie says it wouldn't be destroyed."
"I reject this!" shouted Libya, "we are sovereign countries too!"
"Since then films are believable!" England cynically remarked.
"Are we just going to let the world end without doing anything?" China exclaimed.
"China, the world's not ending," England said, "I believe that we should move the agenda to more practical issues."
"I agree with Angleterre," France said, "since the world's about to end, I will make love with my long-beloved Angleterre publicly as we watch the world sink beneath the waves."
"Aww…" Hungary cried.
"YOU ARE AN ABERRATION TO YOUR COUNTRY!" yelled the Englishman, pummelling France.
Meanwhile, Belarus was holding a document in her hands and forcing it on Russia.
"Brother, sign the marriage document!" Belarus exclaimed, "we must be together while there's still time."
"GET AWAY FROM ME!" Russia cried, pushing back the Belarusian, "EXCEPT FOR BELARUS, ALL MUST BE ONE WITH RUSSIA!"
"I want pasta," Italy suggested.
"Poland, this is frightening…" Lithuania claimed, "…just when things are getting better…"
"Liet, this whole end-of-the-world thingy is like in your head," Poland calmly remarked, "Like once again, I will like return to this world like a phoenix."
"In the end, it's still about you…" Lithuania thought.
"LLLLAAATTTVVVIIIIAAA!" yelled Estonia, holding onto a fainted Latvia, "We need a medic here! He has fainted since the start of this meeting!"
"Personally, I do not find this to be believable," Austria pointed out, "the feel is just isn't there without the proper music."
"I hope we can have one last Christmas before the end," Finland remarked.
"Acknowledge me as your brother before the world ends," Norway said, poking at Iceland.
"Guess I will have a death-match with ya!" Turkey exclaimed, patting at the sleeping Greece, "Wake up, will ya!"
"Socrates…" he murmured, still sleeping.
"Oh mighty God, please forgive me for my sins…" Romano chanted in prayer.
"I must have a special party for this," thought India.
"Oh no!" yelled Korea, "I only have one year to beat all the bosses of every video game and MMORPG ever made and will be made in 2012!"
"These idiots…" Switzerland grumbled.
"EVERYONE, SHUT UP!" Germany yelled, silencing the noise, "Estonia, get Latvia medical attention."
Estonia abided and dragged Latvia out of the room.
"As for the rest of you, this 2012 phenomenon is absurd and baseless," Germany said, "there is no scientific evidence of its occurrence. If it were a natural disaster of any sorts, surely it would have been detected by now."
"But it can be an alien invasion like the X-Files," America insisted.
"You are basing your assumptions on fiction, which is not real by definition," England cried.
"I wonder which country has been harbouring aliens in his house," Russia wondered, looking at America.
"Leave Tony out of this!" America shouted, "But you cannot doubt the hero! I know you will be unprepared, so I shall save us all with…"
"AMERICA!" the German shouted again, "my point here is that there will not be any end-of-the-world in 2012, and that's our final decision!"
"Fine… but don't come begging for my help when it's too late," America remarked.
"Now that that's out of the way," England said, "let's say we get to more important affairs like the European economy…"
The rest of that World Meeting was only more of the same arguments, but that will be explained in another story. Whether 2012 is the end… that cannot be answered and can only be seen when it goes by.
Omake – Boss Spain and the Discontinued Calendar
After the World Meeting, Spain and Romano were strolling down the corridors.
"Spain you bastard, the world's ending and you're still doing that idiotic foolish smile!" Romano exclaimed, "what's wrong with your brain?"
"On the contrary, there's a good reason for this…" Spain thought.
It was still the time of Spanish conquest of the New World. Spain was just about to corner Maya, one of the native (and heathen) Nations. Maya was hiding inside a cave, where strange carvings were made.
"End of the line, amigo," Spain said, "you can either die or join me."
"Please, at least let me begin the 13th round of my calendar," Maya begged, pointing towards the strange carvings.
"I have a calendar in my house and it's based on our glorious saviour," Spain said, "but then again, New Spain is mine… I do not need you and your heathen ways. Say Hola to the Lord for me."
The Spaniard raised his spear and the cave walls were splattered with blood.
"Ah… Romano, you look so cute when you're distressed," Spain remarked.
"I would never imagine how a discontinued calendar would bring so much trouble," Spain thought.
Translation
我不是你的阿四– I am not your servant
Author's Notes
阿四 is a term that refers to servant/coolie
The omake was based on a joke my friends and I had about the Mayan calendar being discontinued.