Ungodly Addiction
Thoughts in Italics
I have a universal Disclaimer in my Profile, so all angry mobs bearing pitchforks and torches are unnecessary.
WARNING: All those who are squeamish and don't like sex, I would suggest you skip the scene in the middle, okay? You've been warned!
**DIP**
"You utter bastard."
My eyes flicker open, and I slowly heave myself into a sitting position, casually leaving my bloodied, rather dead body behind. I blink once or twice, before looking up to see Damien.
Damien, oh how I've missed him.
But Damien doesn't look at all pleased to see me. In fact, he looks downright pissed off. I swallow - or at least, as close as I can without a physical body. I've seen this expression before, and the last time it was on his face, Damien beat Fatass to a bloody pulp.
"Uh… surprise?" I offer weakly, smiling a little, only to have the twisted grimace fall from my lips when Damien's eye narrow. I feel the urge to swallow again. I am in so much trouble…
"What." Damien hisses, and I hear hurt and worry hidden, buried deep beneath the cold fury. "Could possibly have been running through your head when you did this?"
Suddenly all my brilliant plans didn't seem so brilliant. Damien seemed hurt by this turn of events. I don't know what to say, all my excitement seems to have vanished when I died.
I'm dead…
"Were you really that unhappy?" Damien asks softly, ignoring my wide eyes and gaping mouth. "Did you hate being with me so much, waiting for me so much, that you felt you had to kill yourself?"
Suddenly, everything clicks, and I start laughing. I just can't help it. Damien isn't mad because I'm dead. He's mad because he thinks I did this to get away from him. I can see in the look of confusion and hurt on his face that he honestly believes I despise him like that.
My dear, dear Damien… it's exactly the opposite.
"You… moron…" I gasp through my shuddering breaths and hiccupping giggles. "You… c-c-complete… idiot…"
My insults do not seem to lighten Damien's mood, but right now I'm so ecstatic I couldn't care less. I'm still in the right, I did the right thing, I can see Damien more freely now…
I can be with him forever.
As soon as I've calmed down enough to not fall over, I haul myself to my corporeal feet and drag a very surprised Damien into my whispy arms, hugging him so fiercely I threaten to go right through him.
"I did it to be closer to you, stupid," I whisper, eyes closed to hide the tears of joy and contentment in my eyes.
When did I become such a fucking girl?
"I found a book explaining a way that I could possibly become a demon, and that way I could follow you to all the realms, and be with you forever. I wasn't trying to get away, I was trying to get closer."
Damien takes a moment to assimilate this new information, make sense of it, and then his arms are clamped around me, tighter than steel clamps and less likely to ever let me go. He captures my almost nonexistent lips into a hot kiss, and I sigh happily.
This is what I want, this is why I gave myself up to the demons, gave myself up to Damien. As we pull away, I look up t him and whisper the words for the first time.
"I love you."
Damien snorts.
"You could've told me that a lot sooner, or at least before you threw yourself off a freaking building. It would've given me a chance to think of a better way to make you a demon, a less painful way… Why the building, by the way?"
"Dramatic effect," I mumble, feeling a little silly. Of course, if I'd thought to consult Damien, we probably could've thought of a way to make me a demon without leaving a splatter on South Park's school grounds.
To my surprise, Damien starts laughing, loud and long and happy. He keeps his arms wrapped around my ghostly body as he shakes with mirth.
"Dramatic effect…" Damien shakes his head fondly. "You really are cut out to be a demon."
I smile at him, and together we walk the path between human world and Hell, towards my new life.
*warning*
The pain of my leap of faith comes back to me during my passing from ghost to demon. The pain of a hundred shattered bones pierces through me again and again, blood falls from my lips and I gasp for breath. A scream is wrenched from my lips, and I can feel Damien wince.
Finally, finally, the pain slowly recedes to a tolerable level, and I am able to make a biting comment. I cannot remember what I said, but I remember Damien admitting a reluctant, troubled chuckle at my attempt to lighten the mood.
The pain doesn't fully leave for many, many hours. So many I don't know how long I've been dead now. It doesn't matter, because I have all I want right here, and I never want to look back to life again. Let the humans have it, I have power and love here now.
Love, something I never had on the human plane of existence, is so abundant here, in Hell, in Damien's adoring gaze, that it's a wonder I didn't off myself years ago, just for this feeling of belonging. I laugh, the sound rising and falling with the winds of change, the sands of time and the oceans of emotion that roll and toss and turn and live just beneath the humans and their monotonous lives.
When I finally open my eyes as a being free of pain of any kind, the first thing I see is Damien, grinning at me with his red eyes bright with a feral hunger - one I recognize from my months addicted to even the scent, taste or thought of the man in front of me now. I grin back, and we collide in a frenzied fury of teeth and tongue and touch and taste and feel…
I don't even remember moving, but I suddenly find myself pinned beneath Damien's strong body on a soft surface - a bed? I soon find I really don't care and my newly strong fingers weave into Damien's soft black hair and tug, yanking his head back and giving me a better angle to thrust my tongue into his mouth.
We battle for dominance both in the kiss and with our bodies, touching and groping and tugging at clothing until we're both naked and panting and oh my fucking god I am so ready…
I seize Damien's hips and thrust against them with my own, moaning loudly at the feel of my fresh new body responding to the heat and friction and feelings that only this can ever inspire in me. I hear Damien moaning along with me, and that only spurs me forward, literally. I lean forward, sliding lithely down my lover's body until I am able to lick a long, luxurious stripe down his pulsing member with my newly forked tongue.
I smirk at the shudder that rattles Damien's spine as I take him into my mouth, bobbing back and forth, sucking lightly here and nibbling softly there. I know every pressure point, every soft spot that will have my Damien writhing beneath my hands, my tongue…
I pull back, eager for more. I flip us over, until he is over me and smirk at him, one eyebrow raised in challenge. Damien's answering grin is all I need to know before I jolt my hips upwards, crashing our erections together in a glorious collision of nerve endings that has us both drooling for more.
I feel Damien's hand fluttering at my entrance, and a hiss impatiently. The man obviously still thinks I'm a weak, puny human, someone who needs protection. I am no longer that boy, that nervous wreck of a youth.
Now I am strong. Now I am a demon.
I push my hips backwards, impaling myself on two of his fingers before he has chance to protest. It is uncomfortable, but not painfully so. I shift my hips, planting my feet and raising my ass so that I can reach a new depth. Damien gasps and suddenly his lips are on mine again, teeth tugging at my lip, cutting and bruising it as his fingers begin to thrust rough and hard - just like I want.
I moan into the kiss, my hips thrusting restlessly as he pulls out and looks about for something to lube up with. I snarl, and he just sends for a minion. A small, scared looking imp scuttles in, squeaks at the sight of my groaning and naked self on the bed, but I don't give a shit. Give the punk a show for all I care. Damien takes the oil he ordered from the little pixie and returns his attentions to me.
It's damn convenient when your boyfriend is overlord of the underworld, I must admit.
Not soon enough, Damien is pushing at me, thrusting inside too slowly, too slowly damnit…
I jerk my hips up to meet his and smirk at his hiss through my own discomfort. Before I give myself a chance to fully accustom, I begin to move again, eager to have the feeling of connection with Damien again, to feel him moving inside me, regardless of the pain it may cause me.
Damien moans and suddenly he is thrusting hard, pounding me into the mattress the way he hasn't done since the very first few times we fucked, back when it was just an addiction. I moan again, the roughness almost tearing me apart but keeping me together by an inch, almost tipping me over the edge but keeping that sliver of control.
But nothing matters. Nothing else matters except that Damien is here, with me. He is mine and I am his and if he stops now I will die and if he leaves I will fall apart and if he does not stop doing that thing with his tongue I'm going to come…
Two more thrusts and I am lost, lost to the raking, raping pleasure of a good hard fuck. My orgasm rips through me like a torrential hurricane, throwing me against Damien's warm chest and coating us both with my seed. I slump back against the softness, but keep my hips pliant and moving for Damien.
Soon my lover's pace becomes erratic and he is calling out my name hoarsely, kissing my forehead and pulling out with a sigh and a wet noise. I can feel his come trickling from my ass and making a puddle beneath me, but I can't find it in me to care.
All that matters is Damien, that I love Damien and Damien loves me and together we are demons, rulers of Hell and I am his and he is mine and we are both happy.
I lazily reach up for a kiss, the first of many, for many, many years to come.
*all clear*
I look at the figure in front of me, loving them more and more each day. I remember when he was a happy, polite little religious kid, with a blonde bob-cut, bow tie and cap. That kid was a little ray of sunshine in the otherwise crappy hell-hole that is South Park. His British accent and overly chipper attitude was unchanging, even though every other kid in the town abused him; beat him up, put him down, and generally just didn't give a shit how he felt.
'That little kid is long gone now,' I think as I idly play with his fringe, smiling softly. The blonde fringe falls into that person's eyes, covering the look of joy in them. I glance at the crisp black dress pants and half opened deep crimson button-down shirt that has replaced the little cardigan and bow tie the kid used to wear. I smirk at the polished black dress shoes that have taken the place of those cheesy socks and loafers. My eyes pan upwards, before staring contemplatatively at the space where that cute little cap used to sit. I wonder what in Hell's name ever possessed him to think it was a good look...
I remember when that boy was an angry, lost and helpless teenager. I remember his tattered, Goth-punk clothing and dejected, eye-liner stained stare. He was alone in his world, with no one there to balance him, love him, care for him. As a result he was bitter and cynical; an angry and hurt man with no where to turn. I remember the look of deeply rooted hatred that haunted his face and deadened his eyes. My heart aches a little as I watch a tear slide down the boy's face in remembered pain, remembered loss and loneliness.
I swear that the boy will never feel that way again, never need addictions or pain or suffering to feel alive or feel the need to sell himself to feel appreciated, or even used.
I look into that boy's eyes, and know that the same expressions are equally as apparent on my face as they are on his. I pull a packet of cigarettes from my pocket and we both take a fag. I light our smokes and sigh as I feel the nicotine race into my lungs, slowly warming me from the inside. I smile once again at the man in front of me, remembering his growth and life and death and continued changing into the strong, cunning demon he is today.
I turn away from the mirror, marching out of my room and out into the fiery pits of Hell. I walk out into open space and let my blackened, tattered wings unfurl as I take off into the red skies. I have grown beyond what I was, I have become more than what I ever dreamed I could be, and with Damien's help, I will grow to be even more.
I spy Damien flying nearby, and together we soar over Hell and into the Human Plane. I spy South Park going along it's dreary little existence without me, I see Canada and Alaska speeding past below us, guiding our way to our set mission for the day. I slip closer and take Damien's hand as we fly lower and lower, fast approaching our European destination.
As I see the loving gaze that Damien shoots my way, I smile again. With Damien's help, I could easily surpass all my expectations yet again.
Hell, with the love and support emanating from my lover every second of every day, I may well become an Ungodly Addiction myself.
Now there's a thought…
AN ~
CUT
Okay people, that's a wrap.
Ungodly Addiction is officially over, you can all go home now.
After you review, of course :D
I hope you all liked the story, I had a blast writing it!
Huge shout outs to all who reviewed - in particular Nicci, HNG, and my little Anon friend who was formerly known as ScarletWolf. All of you helped move this story along, and without your encouragements I would never have finished it.
I need people like you guys to bug me for my originals :D
And so, Goodbye from me
Until the next story,
Zanchev
Oh, and by the way, what do you guys think of a sequel? ;)