He shakes his head, reminding me so much of mentor-Dimitri, it feels as though I've never left the academy. "Rose, Rose. What am I going to do with you?"

"I was a little distracted, okay? I can go and phone him if you want..."

"You can use my phone, it's..." he trails off, shoulders sinking. "It's in my bag. On the train."

To my embarrassement, tears well up in my eyes. "How- how many do you think died? In the crash?" It is such a random thought, yet it springs to my mind. I have been afraid to even think of it, but now it rushes to the surface, an emotion overload.

"I don't know, Rose."

I bring my knees up to my chest, the sudden whip-lash of emotions shocking my system. "We couldn't protect any of them. We couldn't have saved any of them. God, it's so infuriating!"

Dimitri pats the right side of the bed, and I crawl into it. He puts an awkward arm me. "Rose, I know it's hard to accept, God knows I went through the same thing with Ivan. But you can't protect everyone all of the time. There's sometimes you just need to let go."

I sniffle, burying my face into his arm. "But so many lives. How? How could a strigoi derail an entire train? Just like that?"

He sighs, bending his arm and stroking my hair. "You have no idea how powerful strigoi can become. Some can be hundreds of years old, and can have tens of thousands of Moroi lives that they have drained."

Part of me cannot believe how close contact Dimitri is allowing between us. He must have hit his head harder than I thought. "Did you ever meet a strigoi that old?"

"When I was strigoi?" Dimitri's voice has drained of it's gentleness. I am almost hesitant to answer, but push forward nevertheless, never one to shy away from a conversation.

"Yes."

He sighs, but doesn't make any attempt to remove his hand from around my shoulders.

"Yes, I met one. Galina was working with him on a project, but I was too 'young' to be involved, I was untrustworthy. I suppose it might even have been the train wreck, I'll never know."

I gently run my fingertips up and down his arm. "Was it painful? To see your old mentor like that?"

"At the time? No. She always seemed so much more wise than I was, so much more experienced. I suppose I didn't see it any differently, not when I was one of them. But now, looking back, I suppose it saddens me that the memory of the woman that I idolized has been tainted. But I guess you feel the same way, don't you? You would know just as well as I would."

I shake my head. "No. It's different for me. I mean, I don't think of you the way you think of Galina. Well, mentor-wise, at least. You think of her as a parent figure, an adult, a teacher. But you were so much more to me. Even now, I can't even picture you with red eyes or pale skin. When I think of you, I think of when you first captured Lissa and I. I think of the lust charm, the cabin."

I blush, rotating my neck to look at his face. But Dimitri stares forward, unmoving, unseeing. "That's because you don't remember what happened, you lost your memory of that time. If you did, how could you not think of what I've done to you? How do you not see that every time you think of me?"

"Because, Dimitri, that's not who you were, that's not who you are. That... monster, that wasn't you. That was a strigoi, a body. What makes you you is your soul. The person that you were, that you are now, that's the same person who made me hot chocolate, and told me that he'd always protect me, and kissed me like a million times in the gym."

"I wasn't strigoi when I told you that my love had faded. Was that the man you fell in love with?"

I sigh. Even though I couldn't remember him ever saying that to my face, Adrian had told me what Dimitri had said. It had stung.

"Yeah, you know what? It is. This isn't the first time you've done something 'wrong' and tried to erase the evidence."

He doesn't even blink. "Erase the evidence?"

"Yeah. We kissed in the gym, and you think that if you nip the 'problem' at the bud, then you won't have to feel the emotion. No love, no issue. Just like you are now. If you don't have to be around me, you don't have to feel the guilt."

"That is absolutely not true."

I sigh. "Fine. Of course it's not."

He growls in frustration. It takes us both a minute to realize that although we're fighting and arguing, we're still lying in bed together, his arm around my shoulder.

But, to my surprise, he makes no attempt to move. So I, being the irrational one, jump off of the bed.

"I'm phoning Abe."

I slam the room door shut, just as Adrian walks down the hall. "I leave you kids alone for five minutes and you're already fighting?"

"Shut up." I storm out of the tiny Bed and Breakfast, walking quickly through the snow. I have forgotten my jacket, surprise, surprise, and am now freezing.

There's a pay phone at one of these stores, I remember, although they charge an obscene amount for a phone call to America.

Nervousness creeps into my, taking me by surprise, as the phone begins to ring. The old man picks up, his voice oddly rough and lifeless, like he'd aged drastically in the past few months.

"Mazur," he says sharply, like he's expecting a call from someone who works for him.

It brings a smile to my face. "Hey, Dad."

"Rosemarie? Oh God, Rose is that you?"

"Yeah, yeah, it's me. I'm fine, don't worry, I'm alright."

In the background, I hear my mother, fiery as always. I want to talk to her, Abe. I want to talk to my daughter. Give me the phone!

"Not yet, Janine. Listen, Rose, are you sure you're alright? Belikov was supposed to phone me a day and a half ago. Where the hell is he? I'll kill him. Please don't tell me you got away. I knew I should have sent someone else after you. I knew you wouldn't want to be anywhere near him after what he did to you, I swear to-"

"DAD!" I yell, causing a few shoppers to turn their heads to me. I put my shoulder to them, cradling the phone. "Dad, relax, will you? No, I didn't run. Dimitri's back at the hotel...motel...thing. It's fine. Adrian's here, too. We were at the Belikovs' for a while. Now we're heading back."

"You should be home by now. Why are you not on the plane?"

I sigh, running my hand through my long hair. "There was an accident."

"An accident?"

"Well, more like an attack..."

"Rose?"

Once again, I sigh. "There was a train wreck. We think strigoi attacked it, and the whole thing derailed."

"Derailed? Are you alright? Are you all alright? Where are you? I'm coming to get you right-"

"Abe! Calm down! We're fine, we're alright. But we wouldn't have been if Dimitri wasn't there. Try not to be so hard on him, okay? I would be dead if he hadn't been so fast-reacting."

Abe huffs, and I can just imagine him rolling his eyes. "Fine. But there's a jet at the location that Dimitri already knows about. I want you kids in Moscow and boarding at five o'clock."

"Dad, Dimitri needs to rest. He can't even walk."

"I thought you said everyone was alright!"

"It was a train wreck! It's not like we got away without a scratch!"

He sighs. "Fine. Then drag him to Moscow. I'll see you tomorrow. Five o'clock, Rose."

...

Luckily, we don't have a lot to pack up, so we are able to quickly exit the Bed and Breakfast.

I can tell Dimitri wants to be mad as hell, but by the time we get down the stairs of the place, he's already exhausted and leaning heavily on me. I help him into the taxi, before taking the seat next to him, while Adrian gets the passenger seat.

Dimitri and I sit on opposite ends of the car, not speaking, not looking at each other.

Safe to say, it was a long ride to the airport.

But as I help him onto the plane, I fantasize about just walking away, marching up the steps immaturely and leaving him behind. But I wouldn't, I couldn't, as he would most likely topple to the ground, falling down the stairs. He was limping badly now, and almost all of his weight was put upon me and the railing of the steps leading into the small jet.

Oh well, perhaps these things were better left to the imagination.

Just to let everyone know, I'm not actually planning on any lemons or anything coming into this story, as I'm not comfortable writing them. But anyone who wants to post an add-on one to this story, let me know. You can post it as your own fanfic, feel free. Just please contact me first!

Thanks! And please review