Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, or any of its affiliates; they are the sole property of Stephanie Myer and always will be.

This story is set in an Alternate Universe.

ECHOES OF THE SOUL

Chapter Four

Without accepting the fact that everything changes, we cannot find perfect composure. But sadly, although it is true, it is difficult for us to accept. Because we cannot accept the truth of humanity, we suffer.

– Shunryu Suzuki

"You are home."

Utterly free of emotion, though still heavy with feeling, the softly spoken words barely carried across the expanse of silent room. And yet, each and every word managed to capture their intended with an ease that one could only be born to; a talent that could never be learned. Attention ensnared by the curious tone in the voice, Edward Masen's eyes lifted to stare at the petite little girl across the room; the one that had lived in his room for over two years now, and the same young brunette with whom he was inseparable from.

Mouth dry, and mind blank, Edward nodded in Bella's direction, all the while avoiding her knowing brown eyes; for lack of something to do, the auburn-haired youth pulled his sweat-sticky jersey from his body and tossed it in the laundry hamper. Still feeling unsure for some reason, Edward took his time to unlace his sneakers, concentrating only on the stubborn knots, before tossing them into one empty corner of his room; uncaring that the dirt that clung to the soles was now spattered all over the clean floor.

Plopping his aching body down onto his bed with an audible sigh, Edward ran one hand through his messy, windswept and now tangled, locks. Unable to delay it any longer, the nearing thirteen year old looked up from staring at the floor and Edward took a moment; a moment to really look at the little girl with doe eyes that sat silently, and solemnly on his piano stool, her fingers doodling rather meaningless patterns into the keys in favour of playing, for she lacked any talent as a pianist.

Bella had not grown, not a single inch and not a single pound. She was exactly the same as she had been when he had met her, but that meeting was steadily nearing three years ago now. Her hair was that same rich brown with steaks and highlights of red and gold in the sunlight; her eyes were still brown and doe-eyed, the innocence in them untouched by time. Her skin had not paled, but it also had not darkened, dutifully remaining that selfsame soft tan; not even her voice had changed. Her tone was childish with that hint of one who had seen more than was thought and her laugh was still a beautiful tinkling symphony to his ears.

So, despite the fact the Bella indeed had not changed in all the time he had known her, Edward felt suddenly awkward around the girl, and could not help but be unnerved by the very sight of her. His heart thumped oddly, and his stomach quivered; he felt dizzy and sick, and his tongue tied in knots around her, unable to say even the slightest thing without sounded retarded.

At an absolute loss, Edward grunted helplessly and flopped down on his back atop his bedspread, his whole body humming in pleasure as he relaxed. His arm and leg muscles were tight, and burned a little; he had decided to join the junior basketball league that was held after school, and though he loved the sport and excelled at it, his body was not as co-operative. Every muscle he had groaned in displeasure, and screamed in pain if he moved too fast or too roughly.

At her friend's obvious discomfit, Bella's eyes fluttered over in his direction and she smiled softly, though her eyes remained saddened by the display. Sighing inaudibly, Bella watched her young friend try to massage his sore muscles in vain, completely oblivious of his friend coming to grips with a realization she had felt coming, but was unable to comprehend now that it had actually come. It had only been a year ago that the pair had been as close as anything, but things were changing, and doing so at a quickening pace.

Edward was growing up and he was changing, and though she dearly wished that she could, Bella could not do the same. There was a gap forming between them and though it was not large, in fact it was barely noticeable, it was there and it would only expand in the coming years. And there was nothing that the petite brunette could do but wring her hands in frustration and hopelessness as he pulled away from her, because for her knowledge and wisdom, she was just herself a child.

She was but a little girl of ten years; one that should only have to worry about what she would be getting for Christmas and Easter, or what movie her friends and she should see on the weekend. She should not have to wonder how much longer she had with her only friend and companion before he outgrew and discarded her. She should not have to wonder how she would manage being all alone again, with no one to help her pass the endless hours and empty days.

How much longer did she have with him anyway? Six years? Less... maybe more... what would she do without him? How much would it hurt when he was gone completely; how would it compare to now, when he was pulling away from her in agonizingly slow motion – taunting her with his looming and imminent farewell.

Unsettled even more by the uncomfortable silence that had fallen between the two of them, Edward scratched at his scalp with a sheepish expression, his fingers twiddling nervously in his lap as the boy tried unsuccessfully to pinpoint exactly what had changed since he and Bella had first met. There definitely was something there, but the jade-eyed youth couldn't quite figure out why he suddenly felt so awkward around the girl that he had always been so comfortable around. It wasn't as if Bella had done something wrong, on the contrary, the brunette was constantly doing the right thing; her only fault was that it could be said that she cared to much for others, and not enough for herself, which Edward felt could hardly be called a fault.

Tugging roughly at his messed up curls with frustration growing within him, Edward hefted his still sore form off of his bed and walked to the doorway, murmuring a vague farewell to the forlorn brunette that remained as he stepped out of the room. Walking briskly from the discomfited and ill at ease atmosphere that filled his bedroom, Edward bounded down the staircase, his leaps rattling the frame a little.

Inside Edward's room though, Bella turned from her seat and gazed at the closed door with a despair that seemed to only grow more intense with each passing moment; to her, it felt as if Edward was closing the door on their friendship and was ready to move on now. And though she was fairly sure that that was not the case, she could not help how she felt or the tears that ran unabashedly down her once dry cheeks. Not even the dozens upon dozens of happy, joyous memories that filled the room could bring her their usual comfort, she thought as she sobbed heavily into her arms, tears leaving droplets of salt and water on her dress.

Her memories of Edward were priceless, and she often relied heavily on them on the days when her friend left for more than a day on sleepovers or camping trips, but still. On those occasions, Bella was well aware of when her Edward would be back, and he would have brand new stories to share with her; whereas now, one day Edward would grow up completely and he would leave her behind, and would never return to her side. It was unbearable to comprehend.

Downstairs, ignorant of the harrowing musings of his friends, and completely fixated on his own, Edward raked his hands through his hair, nerves apparent, as he stared down at the bench in the kitchen. Trying to distract his mind from what he was about to do, he studiously counted the millions of grains that made up the bench, playing dumb to the extremely telling look that had taken over his mother's face. It did not do much good though, for he only grew more anxious about talking about feelings with his mother of all people, and Elizabeth Masen's smile only grew until she looked akin to the cat that got the cream and the canary.

Elizabeth took in the softly flushed cheeks and fidgeting hands of her darling Edward, and easily got the gist of what this discussion would be about. Although her son was polite and was more mature than other young boys, he was still a twelve year old boy; and talking about any kind of lovey-dovey feeling was abhorred instinctively. A chuckle evident in her voice, although she did try her best to hide it, Elizabeth questioned her abashed teen, "Are you alright, Edward dear?'

Startled by his mother's query, Edward looked up and met his mother's eyes, those jade coloured eyes that so resembled his own, and stared deeply into them; desperately trying to convey his issue to her without ever having to say it aloud. Unfortunately, he was no more telepathic than she was, so his dilemma would remain unsolved unless he told her.

Mustering up all of the courage that he currently possessed, Edward attempted to sound strong and sure, but happened to fail miserably; instead he came off as uncertain as he stuttered through his reply, "T-there is this-s g-girl and I-I-I've known her-r f-for ages-s! B-b-but now I-I-I feel all we-weird a-round her-r. I-I don't know w-what t-to say or w-what t-to do. W-what's wrong with me?"

A fond smile slipping onto her lips, Elizabeth looked down upon her distraught twelve year-old with a sort of amused pity. She knew that she should not find any amusement in her son's confusion, but it was a little funny to see her little boy so up in arms over a girl. After a while though, the pity won out and she reached forward to lay a comforting hand on her Edward's shoulder. All he needed was a little guidance, and some of his mother's good old advice, and he would get along just fine.

A tear splashed onto the counter at the thought of Edward growing up; it would not be long until he was all grown and ready to leave the nest. Shaking the thoughts off for a moment, she addressed her son softly, the motherly tone in her voice unmistakeable, "Edward honey, do you like this girl?"

Elizabeth eyes teared at the soft look on his little boy's face at her question, though she was a little confused to see his head turn in the direction of the staircase; his eyes flickering curiously for a little more than a second before he swallowed thickly. Eyebrows furrowing on his face, Edward swallowed thickly again and answered roughly, "Of course I like her, mom. We're really good friends."

A convincing smile pasted onto her face, Edward remained utterly oblivious to the bafflement that ran rampant through his mother's mind as she tried to assimilate what he had announced so easily to her. Really good friends...? Edward had never before spoken of any girl that he was close to or even held particular affection for, and none of the other mothers in the neighbourhood had ever implied that any of their daughters regularly hung out with any of the boys, least of all Edward.

Perhaps... yes, that had to be it; her Edward must have been greatly exaggerating the relationship with this girl, as boys were often found to have done. In reality, Elizabeth surmised, her young boy had probably only spoken to this girl once or twice, a few at the most, and saw that as being 'really good friends' with a girl. Satisfied with her rationalization, Elizabeth doled out the rest of her advice, "Well, my darling, just talk to this girl. It sounds to me that you have a bit of a crush on her. And who knows, she may feel exactly the same way. You will never know until you ask."

As expected, a disgusted slightly horrified look overcame her Edward's face at the idea of talking to a girl about his feelings, but Elizabeth's quick eye caught the soft glint in his eyes and the pink blush on his cheeks that belied his supposed abhorrence to the fact. She knew her son well; Edward would take her advice if only to satisfy his own curiosity. For though her son acted the gentlemen; he was inquisitive to a fault and had an unquenchable thirst for answers, not matter how elusive. Yes, he would definitely take her advice to heart. Well, at least I will find out who this girl is.

Face burning in humiliations at actually talking tohis mother of all people about this, Edward merely bobbed his head in thank-you, shook of his mother's hand on his shoulder and bolted. He had to get the hell out of there and fast; he bounded up the stairs, taking them two at a time and ended up at his closed bedroom, staring at it with his hands covering his bloodstained cheeks. Swallowing the large lump in his throat, Edward turned his doorknob slowly and all but tiptoed into his room.

He avoided all eye contact with the petite girl perched on his piano, as his mind ran away with him, thoughts racing through his brain with a surprising pace. Did he like Bella? That was the crux of the problem; he just did not know whether or not he did.

The concept of liking a girl was somewhat foreign to him; after all, he was still just a twelve – nearly thirteen – year old boy; but then again, all his friends talked about the girls at school the same way he had heard some of the older boys did, though they were decidedly less graphic. Even Alec, his best friend, for example positively mooned over a girl in the grade above them, Jane Volturi. Even Edward had to admit that Jane was extremely pretty for a girl; she had elfin features with long, gold blonde hair and bright, green eyes that sparkled when she was happy. She was pretty enough, that nearly all the boy in class watched the girl wherever she went, especially when she was hanging out with her best friend, Victoria Staines; a tall, willowy red-head with the most startling blue eyes.

Oblivious to his more the obvious, and frankly, blatant staring; Edward compared his young friend to those other girls, trying to make sense of everything. Bella was definitely younger than the other two girls; she was a mere ten years old, while both Jane and Victoria were thirteen. And like many of the other older girls, the two teens were starting to develop very interesting additions to their bodies, ones that captured and captivated his and all the other boys' attention; Bella on the other hand was still childish in both figure and face.

And yet Edward found that he preferred the mahogany colour of Bella's hair to any other, and he especially loved the way that it gleamed in the gentle sunlight; sure Jane's blonde and Victoria's red were pretty, but they just didn't compare. The unique soft tan of Bella's skin also happened to capture his attention more readily than the dark sun-kissed tan of most of the girls at his school, like Jane, or the creamy complexion of Victoria and her cousins. And no one had eyes like Bella; doe-eyed and melted chocolate, they were rich and expressive. Not to mention the fact that the grating giggles of the girls at school irritated him now end, even more than their raucous laughter; laughter that made him long for the soft, tinkling laugh of Bella's, and sound that was both pleasing and soothing.

Perhaps he really did like her after all, because although he thought that Jane and Victoria, and well Leah, Lauren and Jessie were all nice to look at with his friends; there was something inside him that felt like it was tugging him in her direction. He was drawn to Bella's unassuming ways and her soft smiles. She warmed him. Crap, I do have a crush on Bella.

Bella watched as Edward sat on his bed and wallowed in his thoughts for a time; already she felt a little more content that he would stick around a little while longer. Not to mention that she was deeply intrigued by the soft blush that had only just began to fade, especially when it returned full force only moments later. Curiosity piqued, she asked, "Edward, are you okay?"

Woken rudely from his musings, Edward bolted upward on his bed and blushed brightly when he noticed that there was no way in hell that Bella had not seen him staring at her with all of the subtly of a bull in a china shop. Bella's head cocked to one side at she took in the steadily pinking cheeks of her best friend, but she only blinked passively in his direction, once again letting him come to her in his own time and on his own terms.

Rubbing his head sheepishly, Edward sighed and peeked out at his brunette companion from beneath the safety of his eyelashes, wondering in vain what on earth he was meant to this girl. How could he tell Bella, the girl that he had known since he was just ten years old, that he had a crush on her? Deciding that the other thing he could do was man up and just do it, like he had done with his mother earlier, Edward gritted his teeth and tried to sound as confident as possible... and once again failed miserably. "I-I-I um, I r-really l-like you, ahem, Bella; like I r-really like-e y-you."

Silence met his words and after a few moments Edward lifted his head, which had dropped at some point during his relatively awkward declaration, to find Bella blinking owlishly at him. The total lack of comprehension on her face did not bode well, especially when instead it appeared to say that she had absolutely no idea what or who she was looking at. Groaning, Edward's head dropped into his hand and his feet kicked out blindly in exasperation; not only had he sounded like an utter idiot and messed up his confession to the girl he like, but said girl either had no idea what he was talking about or she did, and did not feel the same way. In the auburn-haired youth's opinion, neither was a very good option. This sucks.

A few minutes passed before a shuffling noise and a slightly shift in the bedspread made Edward keenly aware that he was no longer alone as he sat perched on his bed. Raising his head reluctantly, his jade eyes met those of his best friend and confidant, Bella, and despite himself, a smile curved his lips. The brunette herself had a decidedly wistful look on her face, and a look of sorrow welling in her eyes as her hand, which she had raised, only pass through the cheek she attempted to touch as if she was nothing more than smoke; intangible and elusive smoke. Dropping her arm with a resigned sigh, Bella let her moist brown eyes wander all over his room, looking anywhere that was not his face, as her breathing stuttered and tear flowed freely down her pale cheeks.

Sniffling quietly, Bella finally turn to face the abashed and tentative teenager, who had thought that time had finally stopped as he had waited on baited breathe for her reply. A bittersweet, sad smile crossed her lips, and her eyes shone with unshed tears and she curled her fingers deeply into his comforter for no reason other than wanting to hold onto something. Lips quivering with emotion, Bella whispered her answer, not a single stutter to be heard, "I like you too, Edward. I like you so very much, but you are growing up and I am not. I am ten, and will be for a long time, while you will only grow older with every passing year."

Bella paused for a second, catching her breath and trying unsuccessfully to stop the tears that were once again running down her cheeks. Unable to halt them, she continued on regardless, "It would not be fair for either of us to begin such a charade as a relationship. We cannot even touch Edward, and I would not condemn that kind of life on you for anything."

Silence permeated throughout the room, Edward's young heart crushing under the weight of such a rejection of his growing feelings from his oldest friend. Unconsciously, or consciously, he reached for he; unwilling to let her turn away from him, but as always, his hands swept through her effortlessly. A frustrated scowl lighting up his entire face, he was filled with anger and misery, but those feelings soon faded when he noticed the deep sorrow and despair that showed on his best friend's face, on his Bella's face. This was his Bella; she would not hurt him just for the mere sake of it, she cared for him and only did what she thought was best for him. He knew in that moment that just as his heart was breaking, so to was hers.

"Bella, I will always love you."

Compared to the stuttered and feeble confession of his crush only moments before, his words now were steady, sure and heartfelt. He did love his Bella, and nothing would ever change that. They may not be able to be what he wanted, but she had promised to never leave him, and he believed that; it was enough for him.

Caught up in the whirlwind of his own thoughts, Edward missed the understanding, and yet utterly heartbreaking expression that slipped onto his young friend's face. The sad, knowing glint in her doe eyes went unheeded, and Bella's sadness went unsoothed. Edward would remain ignorant of the things that Bella herself had had to resign herself to; and if he ever understood for himself, most likely it would not even matter anymore.

Heart aching in her petite chest, Bella hid away all her heartache and pain, and promised softly, her words a soft, velvety whisper in the wind, "And I will always love you, Edward Masen. I promise that nothing will ever make me stop from loving you. Not even you, Edward."

Lost in tremulous thoughts and eyes closed as he lay back on his bed, muscles relaxing under the knowledge that his Bella would always be with him, the softly spoken vow of the little brunette with brown doe-like eyes went unheard, but though Edward could not, Bella could feel the change they had wrought on the pair. Nothing from this moment on would ever be the same.

For Edward would change.