Disclaimer: All original characters belong to BBC/Tiger Aspect

Previously

'I knew you'd leave,' he mumbled.

Marian threw her head back in frustration. 'I am not leaving!' she cried. She meant it, Guy's past crimes sickened her. They wouldn't go away, she knew this. But she also knew he could change, with her at his side.

Marian saw the distant figures of Robin and his men approaching. 'I will not leave you and I will never betray you again, no matter what you have done. You have to trust me.'

Guy said nothing, he sat forlornly, contemplating his own wretchedness. Marian held her hand out to him. She suddenly felt a resolve, her inner strength returning. She would not let him sink into despair, she would not let him fall back and go through life filled with hatred, causing nothing but misery. Guy was not a strong person, he needed her and she would rise to it. She would also do one more thing for the people of Nottingham and her beloved Robin.

'I will stand at your side and you will make me proud, Guy. I have an idea.' Guy took her hand and got to his feet as Robin came into clear view.

As they stood beneath the branches, hands entwined, Marian's eyes sparkled with excitement, anticipation and daring not seen since her Nightwatchman's mask had been reduced to ashes. Marian had a plan.

Sins of the Heart Part Five

'No.' Robin was emphatic as he paced back and forth. Guy stood beside her a look of grim distaste on his face. 'No chance.'

'Forget it, I'm not going on some suicide mission, especially with him,' Guy spat.

Marian sighed, this wasn't going well. She had explained her plan to everyone and Robin and Guy were eying each other with utter contempt. They were a whisker from a fight, as always. She had been encouraged that Robin had taken her decision to leave Nottingham with Guy better than she had thought he would. A shrug and nod belying his private agony. He wasn't going to show his pain in front of Gisborne. The quiet darkness he wore tore at her heart, but there was nothing she could do for him. Unless Robin could find a way to un-marry her, she belonged to Guy and she would have to bear away her love for her brave outlaw whilst making a new life with her husband.

'Think about it, together we can carry more gold, more for the people, Robin,' she was still earnest. 'I can help, you know I can fight, both of you. I also know the castle.'

'Ok,' Robin said slowly, thinking it through, 'you can come, if that's what you want, Marian, a last hurrah, but not him. . .' Marian winced at the venom injected into that last word.

'Guy knows of a tunnel, into the castle, we will need him to help us.'

'Him, help us?' Robin shook his head, then looked up. 'What tunnel?' Robin stopped pacing and looked at her and Guy, beside her, but now half turned away from them all, leaning against a tree.

'Guy had a tunnel built, a secret tunnel into the castle, if we use it no-one will know we're even there, we can be in and out and they'll be none the wiser.'

'Marian, that's rubbish. A tunnel needs diggers, people would know. Gisborne can't have built a tunnel that only he knows about. He's lying, it's a trap.'

'I'm not lying,' Guy said gruffly.

'When was this tunnel built?' Robin demanded, facing his enemy.

'Why should I tell you?' Guy hissed. Marian placed a hand on his forearm, she felt his muscles tense, ready to reach for his sword at any moment.

'Guy,' she said gently, 'tell them what you told me.'

Marian watched as Guy sighed deeply. He looked at her, a flash of tenderness crossed his face, then it was gone, he was grim as he faced Robin.

'After the Sheriff came back from his failed mission in the Holy Land he became paranoid about reprisals. He ordered a secret escape route to be built out of the castle.'

'By you?'

'Yes, by me,' Guy said angrily.

'All by yourself?' Robin asked, Marian could see his anger bubbling, knowing what was to come. She felt sick, ashamed. She hated the choice she had made, that she had chosen a cold blooded killer over Robin.

'The diggers were silenced,' Guy told them grimly. He folded his arms across his chest. 'The tunnel runs from the old church yard right into the castle.'

'It's a trap,' John cried. Much nodded in agreement, Allan stood watching the scene unfold with interest. He knew Guy better than the others. It was to Allan Marian turned as she spoke.

'It's not, Guy isn't lying, besides he is outlawed too now.'

'Alright, so this tunnel exists and it isn't a trap. How do we know he isn't just going to run off with the money?' Allan asked, trying to sound reasonable. Much again nodded vigorously.

'That's what I'd like to know, we do not trust Gisbornes,' Much told Marian pointedly, glaring at her. Marian felt another prickle, Much had been her friend, liked her, cared for her. Now he looked at her with contempt, she was the harlot who had broken his master's heart and she would never, ever be forgiven.

'I will be with you and I will make sure we share it out. Guy is with us.'

'How do we know we can trust you, Lady Gisborne?' Much cried, his anger getting the better of him. 'You could be in league, all the time I thought you loved Robin and now look at you!' Much was clearly more upset than she thought. 'Well may I say, if you're that fickle I'm glad my master didn't marry you.'

'Stop it, Much,' Robin told him angrily. Marian hung her head in shame, Much was right, she deserved it.

'I'm still Marian,' she said softly. Robin looked at her, his eyes bore into hers, she thought she saw contempt, shame in them as he looked at her, seeing her truly as Guy's wife for the first time, not his Marian.

'He doesn't come,' Robin snapped. 'He can tell us about the tunnel, but he stays here.'

'Fine by me,' Guy snarled. 'I could do without getting myself killed on one of your suicide missions. And besides I need to look after Marian.'

'But I'm going too,' Marian insisted, she looked at Guy pleadingly. 'This was my idea, I can fight, you know I can.' She was thinking of the numerous times she had bested Guy as the Nightwatchman and feeling more than a little put out that he should think her in need of such protection. She took his hand and squeezed.

'Please, let me go, I need to do this, let me be who I am, Guy.'

Guy shook his head. 'He will keep you, take you away. Anyway, I have not sunk so low I need to send my wife on some crazed robbery to a castle full of soldiers. I will look after you, I will not let you go.'

'Please, Guy, I need to do this. Robin will not take me, I will come back,' Marian pleaded.

'Unlike you, Gisborne,' Robin said grimly, 'I let Marian make her own choices, however much I hate them because I love her. If you did you'd let her breathe, let her be who she really is, listen to her. You just want to own her.'

Marian felt a jolt, as if a knife had cut through her heart. She could not look at Robin, if she did she would see a man who had put her before his own needs, who was going to let her go with dignity, rather than tear at her heart even more, even as it broke his own. If she looked at him she would love him too much to ever leave this forest. Marian instead turned to Guy, her proud, selfish, defiant husband.

'But I want you to come too, Guy, help us, help me. Let us do this together.'

'Me and you?' Guy asked, his eyes on her alone.

'All of us. It's going to be really dangerous, Prince John has the place crawling with guards, then there's the castle guard. The gold is being kept in the strong room, yes?' Guy nodded in answer to her question; he could plainly see they would not be able to steal it alone.

'So we have to get through that as well?' Allan asked incredulous. 'Not bein' funny, Marian, but Gisborne's right, this is suicide.'

'But you robbed the strong room before,' Marian replied. 'You can do it again.'

'We were lucky, we might not be so lucky this time,' John said shaking his head. He clearly thought the plan was reckless and foolish, especially with Guy's involvement.

Guy was clenching his fists, he seemed to be growing more tense by the minute.

'I can get through the strong room,' Robin muttered, 'if I know the settings. Marian, are they still changed regularly?'

'I don't know,' she answered, her mind whirring, trying to work out how to do this. 'Perhaps I could go up the tunnel first and find out, I am the only one who is not an outlaw, so if I am caught I'll be alright.'

'No,' Guy said quickly. 'You can't, you're my wife, Prince John might take you to get at me.'

'Then how will we find out?'

'You don't need to. The strong room can only be set by two people, only two people know how to do it.' Guy paused, letting this statement hang in the air. 'The Sheriff and me. I was the last to set it.'

'Nice of you to mention it. And do you know how to unset it?' Robin asked witheringly.

'Yes, but you need a key.' Guy was now facing the gang, speaking to them directly. Marian was pleased, it was an improvement, albeit a small one.

'Where is the key?' Robin asked, getting quickly exasperated with Guy's slowness in divulging information.

'One is in the Sheriff's bedchamber and mine is at Locksley.'

'Well we can get that one more easily,' Marian said. 'We can go at first light. Guy, do you think the guards will stay loyal to you?'

'Nobody is loyal to me,' Guy said grimly, slouching back against the tree again. Marian felt another jolt of pain, her heart went out to him. He had so little faith in people and she had done nothing to restore it. She would make amends, it might take forever but she would make it up to him, she would not betray him again.

'They may be, Guy,' Marian murmured, touching his arm lightly. 'After all, none of them liked the Sheriff. But we must be prepared in any case. Is Isabella there?'

'She went back I think. I don't know what she'll do, she helped me in the castle, but she will not sacrifice her position with Prince John for me.'

'Isabella won't stop us,' Robin muttered, 'she might be angry, but she can be won over.'

'Shut up, Hood, what do you know of my sister?'

Marian gave Robin a panicked look. Guy didn't yet know his sister had betrayed him too, she hoped he never found out. Now was most certainly not the time to tell him.

Robin met Marian's look and shook his head. He shrugged and looked back at Guy.

'Nothing. Now, the light is fading, we will not get to Locksley tonight, we need to find a place to spend the night. Tomorrow we go to Locksley.'

'Come on, Marian,' Guy took her arm and began to move away.

'No, Gisborne,' Robin's voice was strained, this was clearly costing him a lot. He sighed then spoke again. 'You stay with us, much as I hate you, you are in no condition to protect Marian with that leg. Besides you don't know the forest and two people are more vulnerable than six.'

'No, I am not letting Marian near you, you just want her, you will-'

'Shut up and get moving, Gisborne, I have not touched Marian all the time we have been here!' Robin was on the edge of self control. 'You are a selfish fool if you think you can survive the night safely. So shut up and come with us.'

Guy made to reply, but Marian laid her hand on his arm again. He gratefully took it and leant on her, his leg clearly not up to supporting his full weight anymore. She looked at him, exhausted beyond the point of pain, his eyes red from tiredness and tears. Guy would not put up a fight, he hadn't the energy.

'Thank you, Robin,' she said before taking Guy's arm and guiding him along with the rest of them. The gang turned and began to walk through the forest, Marian and Guy fell to the back of the group, but not before she had registered the contempt and disgust their faces wore when they saw her walking side by side with her husband, their disdain for Lady Gisborne.

Marian shivered and hugged closer to Guy. They were curled up away from the others, on the other side of a thicket of bushes. There were at least twenty yards between them, Guy had refused to countenance her being any closer to Robin and made sure the others hadn't seen exactly where they were sleeping. Marian was again glad of the summer weather, but even so she was cold now and glad of warm arms around her, holding her tight. Guy was deep asleep, he had not slept in days and after quickly eating the meagre rations they all shared had fallen asleep as soon as night fell.

Marian lay awake, lying on her good side in Guy's arms. She pushed a leg between his, for warmth more than anything and felt his unconscious response: to hold her tighter. She considered that these were the only arms she would lie in now. These strong, possessive arms, keeping her close, protecting her, guarding her.

The forest was always darker than she expected it to be, and louder, it frightened her. Robin wasn't afraid of the forest, he didn't seem to be afraid of anything. If Guy was afraid he didn't show it, his only fear was losing her. Guy was a brave soldier, like Robin. In some ways they were more alike than they realised, in some ways as different as could be.

Marian had lain in Guy's arms many times as he slept and regretted her marriage, whilst at the same time guiltily enjoying his closeness, and his body. This time it was different, Guy knew what she had done, knew of her betrayal with his worst enemy and he still wanted her, still loved her. More than that he had done what she thought he would never be able to do and rid himself of the Sheriff – killed the Sheriff – for her. She was glad Vaisey was dead, he had ruined her life, Robin's life, Guy's life and in no small way hastened her father's end. Marian was grateful to Guy for ridding them all of him. She pressed herself a little closer to him.

Marian was willing herself not to think of Robin, the great love of her life, now in her past.

No, not in her past; he was still there, a few yards away.

Last night she had been in Robin's arms, curled up against his chest. She would have been happy there, content, but for the guilt eating away at her. Was she happy now? Not really. She had made her choice, not that there was ever a true choice before her, it was not as if she could have her marriage dissolved and marry Robin instead. She was instead grateful that Guy's devotion to her had been strong enough for him to take her back lovingly, that his initial violent reaction had cooled.

She would have to keep trying with Guy, keep trying to steer him on the right path, try to keep loving him. Loving him when he was asleep, injured and holding her lovingly in his protective arms was easy, loving him when confronted with his past crimes, his temper and selfishness would be the difficult part. But he was her husband and love him she must, maybe it would not be so hard, he was devoted to her and she was most certainly stirred by him. More than she would admit, even now. She remembered how she would lie in bed at Locksley, taking herself upstairs far earlier than he, so as to avoid his company in the evening, but had lay awake, waiting for him to come to bed. When he had slipped in beside her she lay still, pretending that she hadn't been waiting, that she was sleeping. But as soon as he leaned across to kiss her goodnight she was upon him.

Guy had quickly learnt to go along with her charade. He never spoke to her, she could feel him fighting the urge to tell her things, tell her how he felt about her. She would put her finger to his lips if he started to talk. That or kiss him. Kiss him over and over until he had no words left and was lost in his lust for her, lust which she readily returned. Marian always felt guilty about enjoying him in this way, perhaps because she didn't really love him at first. It felt wanton and illicit in a way her liaisons with Robin never did. Perhaps this was because she always saw herself as belonging to Robin, in spite of her marriage. But she had grown to love Guy. Those passionate nights had become something more. Something that truly tore her between the two men.

She heard a rustling, someone was moving about. She tensed, Guy slept on, too exhausted to stir at mere rustles. Maybe it was just an animal, but it sounded more like a person. She lifted her head slightly to listen more clearly.

'Master?' It was Much, Marian breathed a sigh of relief then tensed again, wondering if Robin was with him. He was.

'Master,' Much said again. 'Ah, there you are, I can't see a thing, are you coming to sleep?'

'In a bit.' Robin's voice sounded strange, choked, indistinct.

'Robin?' Marian then heard Much drop to the floor, she heard the sound of his soothing and thought he was patting Robin's back. Tears filled her eyes, because the worst sound she could hear was Robin crying, really crying this time in a way she had never known. In the middle of the night when he thought all eyes and ears were sleeping. He has been so stoical, almost to the point of indifference, at her announcement that afternoon. He was anything but.

'I love her so much,' Robin told Much through his sobs. 'And I will never see her again.'

'Maybe she'll change her mind,' Much said is a soothing voice. 'She might just be feeling sorry for him because he hurt his leg. Or rather the Sheriff did, I'm glad he did, though I am also glad the Sheriff is dead. I hated him. Even more than Gisborne if I may say so and that's a lot as you know. Though he did make me a lord, but I still thought he was evil, even then.'

Marian heard Robin laugh a little at his friend's chatter.

'She will come back, she loves you, I have seen you together.'

'Much, she cannot come back. He is her husband, I am not. I had hoped that perhaps he wouldn't want her . . . but he does and I cannot ask her to leave him again. I cannot do that to her. There is no way out.' Robin was utterly dejected.

'How can she stand there with him?' Much was angry now. 'I thought I knew her, but look at her, with himlike the good little wife. Well, I have to say I'm disappointed,' Much huffed and sighed. 'You could just kill Gisborne.'

'Tempting.'

'Seriously, who'd miss him?'

'Marian would. She loves him, Much,' Robin sounded like he was crying again.

'But I thought she loved you!' Much was outraged.

'She does. She told me she loves us both. God knows why, but she loves that bastard and I have to let her go.'

'Fight for her, Robin, you're always telling us to fight for what we believe in, for Nottingham, she loves you more, I'm sure.' Much sounded incredulous that anyone would choose Gisborne over his master.

'She probably does, but she is married to him. Much, I cannot keep going back to her, I love Marian too much and this is tearing her apart. She could have been killed back in Locksley when that swine found out and I've never seen her cry as much as she has lately, not even after her father died. I cannot carry it on. I have always been selfish with Marian. Going to war, then getting myself outlawed, all the time I should have been putting her first.

'But I had duty my the King, I had a duty to save Allan and Will that day. I should never have let this start, but I love her so much . . .' his voice trailed off and it sounded like he was shedding tears again. 'I was sick of doing the right thing then, but now I have to. I am Robin Hood.' His voice was flat, but there was still a note of pride. 'I am not going to sink to his level and take what I want by any means. I have to let her go, to have a life, a future.'

'With him?'

'Yes, with him. At least the bastard seems to care about her. It could be worse I suppose.' Robin was trying to be optimistic, his tone of voice suggested nothing could be worse.

'And what about this scheme of hers? You should just send them on their way, because I can see what this is doing to you. Her with him.' The venom is Much's voice was uncharacteristic and all the more cutting for it. 'She should leave you alone now.'

'It is a good scheme, Much. Besides, much as I hate to admit it we need Gisborne, to unlock the strong room, because John was right, last time we were lucky.' Robin sighed deeply, he was trying to pull himself together. 'That money will make a real difference to the people and stop John in his tracks. It's too good to pass up.'

'Well, he doesn't care about Nottingham or the King, why would he help us? I don't trust him.'

'Nor do I, but he has nothing now and he wants the money for a new life with Marian.'

'You think he really loves her?'

'He wouldn't know where to begin,' Robin said bitterly, 'he just wants her. He doesn't know her, respect her . . . it's Gisborne, he sees, he wants, he takes.' Robin paused, considering. 'I don't know maybe he does, if he's capable of loving anyone it's her. But he will never, ever love her like I do.'

Robin's voice trailed off, Marian knew he must be crying again. She heard Much try to comfort him and shepherd him back to where they were sleeping. Their footsteps and muffled voices trailed away and the forest was still again but for the call of an owl in the distance and Marian's quiet shaking as she cried desperate and unrelenting tears. She had turned away from Guy, his arm was still around her, he was still deep asleep. She wanted to run back to Robin. He was right, Guy would never love her like he did, he wouldn't know where to begin. He loved her in his own way, but it was selfish love. He had wanted her and taken her and despite her growing feelings for him their souls would never be bonded, their hearts would never be as one. Not like her and Robin.

It was well past breakfast time when Guy finally woke – or at least it would have been if they were in Locksley, where breakfast was served. Marian herself had not stirred until the sun was getting halfway up the sky, she too was exhausted. She had eventually cried herself to sleep, at what time she knew not. Guy groaned and pulled Marian closer as he registered their surroundings.

'God, I'm thirsty,' he yawned. He rubbed his eyes and regarded her.

'I thought you'd never wake up,' Marian replied, passing him her water skin. Guy took several deep gulps.

'Sorry,' he said, wiping his mouth and passing the water skin back to her. Guy sat up and held his hand out to help Marian up.

'How's your leg?'

'Much better, you did a good job,' he said stretching it out and lightly pressing his wound.

'Good.'

They were slightly shy, of each other, unsure what to say after yesterday, Marian knew Guy had half expected her to be gone by morning. They both smiled awkwardly trying to break the tension, then laughed softly as they realised they were doing the same.

'Not as comfortable as Locksley is it?' Marian said gently.

'No, but you're here and that's the main thing.' Guy immediately looked a little embarrassed at his affectionate candour. Marian felt a rush of warmth and affection for him. She leaned in and kissed his cheek lightly.

'I always will be. I'm so sorry Guy, I wish I could turn back time, I wish I had never . . .'

Guy put his finger to her lips. 'Shush, it's just me and you now, that's all that matters.' He was so earnest when he spoke.

'Can you really forgive me?'

'I love you,' he murmured. 'Besides it was him, Hood. And the Sheriff, if it wasn't for the Sheriff poisoning everything you wouldn't have . . . well it doesn't matter now. He is dead and you are here, with me.'

Marian nodded, it seemed Guy could not wholly blame her for her infidelity. But if that was how he was going to cope she was not going to contradict him.

'Ah, you're up,' Allan called as he approached them carrying a small loaf of bread. 'Here breakfast.' Allan threw the loaf at Marian, she caught it and passed it to Guy.

'Robin wants us to go to Locksley immediately. The plan is that you two follow and go into the house. We'll stay hidden, but we'll be there if you run into trouble. Robin figures that Prince John will have already realised you didn't go straight back there and will now leave the house alone, because of Isabella.' Allan was all business, no jokes, no cheekiness this morning. 'The servants are unlikely to turn you in, so just waltz in, get the key and anything else you need, any weapons would come in handy, come straight back and then we check out the tunnel. Got it?'

'Why should I do what Hood wants?' Guy said darkly.

'He's our leader,' Allan shrugged.

'He's not mine. I'll go when I'm good and ready, now get lost,' he snarled at Allan. Marian just looked at Allan apologetically, but said nothing. To speak now would undermine her husband. Undermine him in front of a man who used to work for him and betrayed him. Allan shook his head and walked off, muttering under his breath.

'It makes sense, Guy,' she whispered gently when Allan was well out of ear shot. Guy sniffed and ignored her; he tore a portion off the bread and passed the rest to Marian.

'We'll go when I'm ready,' Guy muttered darkly. They ate in silence, now both tense about the coming day. Marian was far more worried about Guy and Robin being near each other than any reckless, daring raid on the castle.

Eventually Guy rose and offered a hand to help to Marian to her feet. Marian took it and kept her hand in his, trying to reassure him she would stay at his side. Guy gradually relaxed at her touch, he turned to face her, leaned down to kiss her. He was gentle, a little shy, nervous even. After all, he wasn't accustomed to having his affection returned. Marian felt a stab of guilt, he was her husband, he should not be afraid of rejection when he kissed his wife. She also felt a rising wave of desire. Marian returned his kiss, deepening it, pulling him closer. Like all those nights in Locksley, she fell into his arms so much more easily that she thought she would. Guy responded readily, his arms were quickly around her, holding her, pulling her closer, hands roaming. Shamefully Marian felt herself hotly responding to him, wanting him, there and then. It would make her forget, forget what she had heard in the night, forget Robin, forget herself.

Marian hadn't forgotten where they were however, she pulled back. 'Not here, Allan might come back,' she said a little breathlessly. 'Or the others and we have to make plans, get ready,' her head was screaming at her to stop, her body was not. Guy ran his hands over her hips and then up her spine, he stroked her hair, gave her a dark smile.

'I want you, Marian. You are mine, are you not?'

It was also a test, he wanted her to prove she belonged to him, that she had chosen him. Marian could not let him think otherwise, because she did belong to him, she had chosen him. And she wanted him. He was gently kissing her neck, sending shivers through her whole body. Guy didn't care that the gang might hear them, see them even, she suspected he half wanted them to. But Marian could think of nothing worse. She pushed Guy back, immediately regretting the loss of his lips on her skin.

'But not here, come with me,' she smiled at him, kissed him again, then pulled back breathlessly. 'Come, Guy,' she said as she took his hand and led him into the forest.

Marian led Guy some way before reaching a hollow underneath a great chestnut tree. 'Nice spot,' he said dryly, 'quiet, romantic.' A smile was tugging at his lips as she faced him.

'Very,' Marian replied, feeling a rush of something, that heady thrill he elicited from her, so much more easily that she would ever admit, but a thrill she loved nonetheless. She pulled him to her, this time letting her want take her completely, letting him claim her.

Locksley, tunnels and money could wait.

To be continued . . .