Purposely Physical

A/N: I am such a saaaaap in this chapter. Seriously, it's soooo sappy it's almost melodramatic. Well, I guess that's what you get when you name a chapter 'Acceptance'. Erm, warning for sappiness I guess?

Last chapter, Kaidoh's PoV.

Kaidoh notices something. That something being Momoshiro's black boxers. "Those are mine," he says.

Momoshiro stops brushing his teeth for a second and leans back to look at Kaidoh. "Huh?" he splutters, toothpaste still in his mouth.

"Those are my boxers," he repeats.

Momoshiro's eyes travel down towards his half naked body, and his eyes stare at his boxers. Then he does a little dance, swaying his hips back and forth, and laughs at Kaidoh's disgusted expression.

He spits out some of the toothpaste to talk. "They look much better on me, don't they?"

"I was looking for them," says Kaidoh. He really wants to strip Momoshiro right now. To get his boxers back, that is. "I thought I'd lost them."

"Well, they're mine now," says Momoshiro with a shrug, then returns to brushing his teeth.

Kaidoh says nothing for now, but he knows he'll get it back later, when he'll remove it himself. He continues brushing his teeth in front of the mirror as well. His shoulder bumps against Momoshiro's; that idiot is taking up almost the entire sink, so he slightly pushes himself against his shoulder, to make free up some space for himself. Momoshiro of course, sees this as a challenge, and he pushes back, pretending to not notice and still brushing his teeth.

"Stop hogging the entire sink!" yells Kaidoh and he pushes against Momoshiro more forcefully.

"You schtop howwing it!" says Momoshiro through his toothpaste. Some of it lands on Kaidoh's face, and that in turn pisses him off even more.

In the end, they're on the bathroom floor, Momoshiro's on the bottom, with Kaidoh on top. Half of the bathroom mats are tangled in between them, and there's toothpaste all over their half naked bodies, and some on the floor as well. They growl and struggle for dominance, and Kaidoh's half trying to get his boxers back.

Hazue, Kaidoh's little brother, decides to open the bathroom door during that time. Kaidoh freezes in mid-action, his hands on Momoshiro's boxers, in the process of tugging them off, and Momoshiro whose hands are wrapped around Kaidoh's neck, was in the process of biting Kaidoh's ear. They both stare at Hazue in silence, their eyes huge and wide, and Kaidoh's toothbrush falls from his mouth and lands on Momoshiro's stomach with a silent 'plop'. Hazue closes the bathroom door and silently scuffles away.

Kaidoh pulls himself away from Momoshiro.

"You think he noticed?" asks Momoshiro.

Kaidoh stares at Momoshiro in disbelief; is he serious? Of course he noticed! What else would he think about two guys lying on the floor, half naked, and one trying to take of the other one's boxers? Fuck. They weren't even doing anything dirty this time, and Hazue just had to walk in on them in the strangest position. Ah crap.

"You forgot to lock it," mumbles Momoshiro. He flings Kaidoh's toothbrush away from his stomach, then gets up to clean the rest of his body.

"You were the last one to walk in, dumbass," retorts Kaidoh. He gets up as well, and they're now cleaning together, standing side by side at the sink. Momoshiro is still hogging most of the space though.

"Oh right, I did," Momoshiro laughs.

"That's not funny."

Momoshiro stops rubbing his arms clean and leans his head against Kaidoh with a sigh. "We should really ..."

"I know," Kaidoh says, not letting him finish. He looks down at his hands on the sink. "I know."

"Not to put pressure on you or anything, but if we keep this up, sooner or later they'll figure it out anyway." Momoshiro bites his lips as he realizes something. "If they haven't already, that is."

Kaidoh snorts, half embarrassed, half nervous, and a little amused. "You're just lucky your family is so easygoing," he can't help himself but say. He knows it's not Momoshiro's fault, it's not his fault his family accepted them so easily, but he can't help but be insanely jealous at it either.

Momoshiro messes up Kaidoh's hair, which is rather affectionate, and something Kaidoh secretly likes, but hisses at it anyway. "Come on, don't be such a dick. I'm here too, you know. You're not alone."

Kaidoh looks up at Momoshiro, and for once in his life, he thinks Momoshiro looks rather mature, sort of intelligent, not the moron who would easily mess things up. Like ... someone you can depend on. Well, the image is a little bit ruined when he's half naked, his boxers are threatening to fall off his ass, and he's covered in toothpaste. But hey, that's Momoshiro. Kaidoh leans his head against Momoshiro's toothpaste covered shoulder and takes in a deep breath.

"Yeah, I know."

He lets him keep his black boxers for a little while longer. Just for a little while.

oOo

"Ahh, we're going to be third years soon," says Momoshiro. They're eating lunch on the rooftop again. "Eiji-senpai is graduating and going off to college. I feel a little sentimental. He's holding a party too, everyone's gonna be there."

"It's not like he's moving out of the country," says Kaidoh. He picks at his food with his chopsticks, not really hungry anymore. He offers some to Momoshiro, who gladly takes it.

"Yeah but, he might as well be," he says and chews on some rice. "I mean, we don't exactly keep in touch."

Kaidoh raises his eyebrows. "Not with anyone? Not even Echizen?"

"No. The brat is in America. What about you?"

"I still discuss training techniques with Inui-senpai sometimes."

Momoshiro swallows the rice and quickly burps afterwards. Kaidoh gives him a disgusted look. "Really, when's the last time you talked to him then?"

"Last week. We were jogging together."

Momoshiro pinches Kaidoh's cheek with his chopsticks. Kaidoh slaps him away. "Do you go easy on him too?"

"No, we run the entire way. I only go easy on you."

Momoshiro huffs out loud. "Fuck you, you're both training freaks. No normal person would be able to do that every day."

"Only a lazy person like you wouldn't be able to finish it," scoffs Kaidoh.

"Who are you calling lazy!"

"You of course, dumbass."

"I'm not lazy. I just like to slack off."

Kaidoh laughs, and Momoshiro joins him. He looks at Momoshiro's puffed up smiling cheeks, and he wonders, when he had grown to like his laugh this much. When had he grown to like spending time with him like this, to simply talk and eat lunch together. It seems like such a precious moment in time, up on the rooftop with Momoshiro, with no one else but them.

"Kaoru-chan," says Momoshiro.

"What?"

"Make me some fried noodles next time."

"You should be happy I make you any lunch at all."

"Hey, you were the one that wanted to do it!"

"That doesn't mean I'll do everything." He rolls his eyes.

"Oh right, I got you something," says Momoshiro and he quickly pulls something out of his pants.

Kaidoh scooches closer and looks at what it is. It's a badly wrinkled photograph of Momoshiro, standing in his Seigaku tennis gear on the courts. He looks younger, but just as dumb.

"I don't want a picture of you," he says immediately. Alright, perhaps he does. Maybe one that makes him look a little bit more intelligent.

Momoshiro hands him the picture. "No look, in the background."

Kaidoh brings the picture closer to his face, because there's not much in the background besides the school building. Is he supposed to see something?

"What? Are you messing with me?"

"Ugh, no, can't you even recognize your own stupid bandana when you see it?" Momoshiro points at a spot, at the building, above Momoshiro's shoulder, and there's a speck of green located in the distance. It's so tiny, Kaidoh has to look at it twice before he can see, that that's indeed him. Very, very far away from Momoshiro.

"It's a picture of us!"

"Are you serious?" he asks, mouth agape.

"Well yeah, I know it's not the best but ..."

"How the hell is this a picture of us? I'm way in the background, you idiot."

Momoshiro sighs heavily, he grabs the picture back and starts to rip a tear in it, but Kaidoh quickly yanks it out of his hands. "Don't tear it up!" he hisses.

"Oh so you do want a picture of me," teases Momoshiro.

Kaidoh holds it possessively against his chest. "Fuck you."

"Well, it was the only picture I could find of us. We literally have no pictures together."

"Not one?"

"Not a single one! I looked everywhere too. We're not even in group pictures. It's either me with the rest, or you with the rest, but never together. It's like we hated each other or something."

"We did," points Kaidoh out.

Momoshiro gives him a fake look of hurt. "Well, don't say it so bluntly."

"Why were you looking for pictures of us?"

Momoshiro scratches the back of his head, the way he usually does when he's feeling embarrassed. "Well ... ehehehe. My mom gave me this really nice picture frame the other day ... and ... yeah."

"Oh," he says. He's never really thought of it, a picture with Momoshiro. But now that it's on his mind, he sort of wants one too. Not framed or anything, but it would be nice to have one.

"Yup, I've decided. Let's go to a photo booth sometime," says Momoshiro determined.

"Idiot," sighs Kaidoh. But he wants one too.

He keeps the picture that Momoshiro gave him and places it underneath his pillow at home. He sleeps better this way.

Next time he sees Momoshiro, he gives him his fried noodles lunch.

oOo

"You're way too fat!"

"Shut up, I'm a growing young man!"

"Oof!" Kaidoh wheezes. "Get off me!"

Momoshiro looks at him, his face pulled up in an irritated scowl. "Well, how else am I supposed to get in the frame?"

"Not by sitting in my lap!"

"Then move over." Whether Kaidoh wants to move over or not, he's shoved against the tiny little wall either way, Momoshiro now sitting on the little stool as well, and taking up the majority of its space, the bastard.

"Now I'm not even in the frame, are you stupid?" Kaidoh hisses.

Momoshiro pulls Kaidoh's head towards his chest with his arm around it, then he looks straight towards the camera in front of him. "Problem solved," he says.

It's really uncomfortable though, so Kaidoh elbows Momoshiro in his side, then sits back up straight. How in the world are they going to do this? They can't even sit still long enough to take a picture, let alone sit in front of the frame together. Momoshiro grabs Kaidoh's shirt and he growls at him. Kaidoh grabs his shirt as well, it's a reflex.

"Don't fight with me, Kaoru!"

"Then don't put me in uncomfortable positions!"

Flash.

"Ah fuck, look, it already took the first picture!" complains Momoshiro.

"If you didn't open your big mouth to complain—we'd be in frame by now!"

"Why you!"

They start pulling each other's shirt, stretching the fabric between their hands, and bumping their heads against each other. At the same time, they're also trying to shove each other off of the little stool, and there's a mess of moving and flailing limbs going on in the photo booth, sometimes it sticks out of the curtain next to them.

Flash.

"Stop it, you're ruining our pictures!" yells Kaidoh.

Momoshiro decides this is a great time to shut Kaidoh up with his mouth. He clashes against it in a rather painful way, but Kaidoh's not in the mood for some kissing, so he tries to shove Momoshiro away—except the bastard is too fat and he's now pushing him against the wall and trying to stick his tongue down his throat. He finally pries Kaidoh's tight lips open and worms his tongue inside.

He lets him.

Damnit.

Flash.

Damnit!

What ensues is a half tussle battle, and the rest is filled in with sloppy kisses and grabbing hands. Kaidoh can't make up his mind; one second he wants to take the damn picture and tries to get Momoshiro off of him, and the next second he's filled with adrenaline and hormones and angrily sucks at Momoshiro's lips. His hormones and Momoshiro's tongue eventually win him over and thoughts of taking a normal picture with him is thrown out of his mind. Especially when Momoshiro starts sucking on the side of his neck, which makes Kaidoh's face scrunch up together while his mouth is wide open, trying to suck in air.

Flash.

He barely even acknowledges the flash as Momoshiro plants a kiss right above his collarbone. Then one higher, and another, and Kaidoh's feeling all fuzzy again and he moves his body against Momoshiro. He slides his tongue all the way up his neck, to his ears, which feels both disgusting and pleasurable. Kaidoh's hands are everywhere on Momoshiro's body, feeling him there and there, and scratching a trail of red marks on his arm when Momoshiro nibbles on his earlobe.

"Takeshi ..." says Kaidoh in a low voice. He sighs in pleasure and squirms a bit—but they have to stop. This is getting a bit too ... Momoshiro's hand ends up in Kaidoh's lap, right on his ...

"Not here!" he hisses out loud, and gives one final push against Momoshiro and he falls off of the stool—and rolls out of the booth.

Momoshiro lies on the floor with a puzzled expression; he's too shocked to even complain. Kaidoh makes his way out of the booth and wipes his wet lips dry. He looks down at the idiot, then helps him get up.

"You know," says Momoshiro, "next time—"

The photo booth whirs and cracks, and out pops a strip of photos. Kaidoh doesn't get to hear what 'next time' will happen, and he quickly scoops up the pictures from the booth. Momoshiro leans over his shoulder to look at them too.

The first picture has them grabbing each other by the shirts. The second one they're bumping heads against each other, each yelling and having an ugly expression on their faces. The third has Kaidoh pressed up against the wall as Momoshiro kisses him. The fourth ... Kaidoh blushes and he quickly moves his thumbs to cover up his face so Momoshiro can't look at it.

"Heh," grins Momoshiro. "That about sums us up."

Kaidoh punches his arm.

They end up splitting the pictures afterwards. Each one getting a fighting one, and a kissing one. Momoshiro insists on getting the last picture, which Kaidoh had to be convinced of.

He's eventually bribed when Momoshiro gets him to make the same expression as the last photo.

oOo

Everyone's there, except for Echizen, who's still in America. But excluding him, everyone of the old Seigaku tennis club is in the room, exchanging greetings and small talk with each other. Kaidoh stands awkwardly in the middle of the room as Momoshiro goes off on his own and happily chats with everyone.

"Hello, Kaidoh," says a chilly voice.

Kaidoh turns around. "Hello, Inui-senpai. Did you graduate as well?" That was a silly question; of course he did. Everyone in this room except for Momoshiro and him had graduated high school.

"I had a 100 percent chance of passing," he says with a push of his glasses.

Of course he did. Kaidoh looks over at the living room, which is connected to the kitchen, where everyone is huddled. There's Eiji who is fixing snacks for everyone, Oishi who is right behind him, Tezuka who is on the couch talking with Fuji, and Kawamura is talking with Momoshiro. Everyone has grown up, becoming taller, broader, and their voices much deeper. Only he and Momoshiro look the same. Or perhaps that's because he was never separated from Momoshiro that he didn't notice the both of them growing up.

"Snacks are here!" yells Eiji excitedly. He walks out of the kitchen carrying a tray full of bowls that are filled with chips, crackers and other things that are bad for you. Momoshiro is the first one to grab a handful of chips out of one of the bowls.

Before Eiji can complain, Kaidoh steps in and slaps Momoshiro's hand. "Idiot, don't be too greedy. Respect your host."

Momoshiro gives him a grumpy look, but lets his hand go and the chips fall back into the bowl, and he grabs three pieces in return. He munches on them loudly, giving Kaidoh a dirty look.

Eiji hands everyone drinks, then raises his glass in the air. "I'd like to make a toast!"

Everyone stops talking and they gather together. "To the Seigaku members: congratulations on your graduation!" Everyone clinks their glasses together, Momoshiro and Kaidoh do it as well, even though they're not graduating.

Despite being around everyone again, they feel further away than ever. Everyone's going their separate paths, almost no one will pursue tennis. What will happen to him when he graduates? What of Momoshiro? Momoshiro notices Kaidoh's gloomy look, and he throws an arm across his shoulder. "Come on Kaoru-chan, don't sulk!"

"I'm not sulking," he says with a pout.

Kawamura looks at them perplexed. "You guys ... aren't fighting?"

Momoshiro and Kaidoh look at him, Momoshiro's arm still slung over his shoulder. "Huh, why?" asks Momoshiro.

"You just called Kaidoh 'Kaoru-chan' and didn't get hit?"

Eiji happily joins the conversation. "Ne, they've been calling each other by their first names since they entered high school!"

Kaidoh hisses and hides his blushing face, while pushing himself away from Momoshiro. He quickly walks away before anything else embarrassing can happen. Stupid Momoshiro with his stupid nickname. He at least wants to look dignified in front of his senpais. He wanders around Eiji's house and happens to stumble upon the bathroom, so he enters. He splashes some water in his face at the sink, and when he looks up at the mirror, he sees Momoshiro in the reflection, standing behind him.

"What's wrong?" he asks. His voice is serious, that tone he only uses around Kaidoh when he's being gentle and caring.

"Nothing," responds Kaidoh and he dries his face with a towel.

"You know, they're talking about us in there."

His stomach clenches tight. "Let them talk." What will happen if he returns? Will they find out? Will they laugh at them? Shun them?

Momoshiro puts his arm around Kaidoh's stomach and presses his body against his back. Kaidoh naturally leans in. "What are you so worried about, hmm?"

"I don't know."

Momoshiro puts his chin on Kaidoh's shoulder and sighs, it's making Kaidoh feel a little bit better. Less queasy, less anxious. More comfy. He places his hand on top of Momoshiro's and squeezes it.

"Everyone's graduated already," says Momoshiro.

His breath tickles Kaidoh's skin, and it feels like a warm blanket, covering him up. "I know. They're all leaving us behind." He doesn't want to be left behind by Momoshiro.

"Hey now, who was the one that said they're not moving out of Japan?"

Kaidoh snorts. "Not like that." He snuggles closer to Momoshiro's warm and big body. "Not like that," he murmurs.

"They're not going to laugh," he says. "Well okay, maybe Eiji-senpai will faint. Since he still hasn't realized after two years."

Kaidoh grins. "He's almost as dense as you. Almost."

"Hey now!"

Kaidoh chuckles and Momoshiro tightens his grip on him. He doesn't feel anxious or queasy anymore. If Momoshiro is with him, it'll be fine ... it'll all be fine.

There's a very loud bang that suddenly echoes through the bathroom. Kaidoh freezes, Momoshiro stops snuggling, and they look at each other in the mirror with wide eyes. The stench of rotten eggs fills up his nose, and Kaidoh immediately covers it up before he can smell it some more and throw up.

"Oh my god!" he says. He starts hitting Momoshiro to try and get away from him.

"What!" whines Momoshiro indignantly. "Those chips made me gassy!"

"That's fucking disgusting, you pig!" He punches Momoshiro's stomach and he finally lets go of his grip, then he quickly opens up the bathroom door—and almost trips over Eiji.

"Eiji-senpai," he says, surprised.

Oishi is right behind him, crouched on the floor. Eiji starts to smile nervously. "Ehehe, it was Oishi's idea!"

"What, no it wasn't!"

Fuji is right behind them, and snaps a picture with his shiny digital SLR. Inui is standing next to him, and is seen scribbling furiously in his notebook. Kawamura shuffles awkwardly, and Tezuka looks as emotionless as ever.

Kaidoh grows hot in the face; does everyone know now?

"Yo!" calls out Momoshiro as he also exits the bathroom. He waves his hand in front of his face. "Phew, don't go in there—Kaoru-chan can be rather smelly."

Kaidoh swings his fist at Momoshiro, who luckily dodges it.

"Kaidoh, Momo ... it can't be right?" asks Eiji in disbelief. "Tell me you guys weren't ... all this time."

Inui pushes up his glasses. "There's a 87 percent chance of Kaidoh and Momoshiro being in some sort of relationship."

Kaidoh wants to crawl in a pit full of spikes and get slowly impaled—anything is better than enduring this. He wants to die, and preferably, take Momoshiro with him, so he starts to strangle him in front of everyone.

"Seriously? Seriously! Right under my nose! Oh, I feel deceived!" whines Eiji.

"Now, now, Eiji, they might have had their ..." Oishi swallows. "Reasons."

"Shouldn't we break them up?" asks Kawamura concerned. "Momo's face is turning blue."

"There's a 15 percent chance of Momoshiro passing out because of lack of oxygen. There's a 66 percent chance of him punching Kaidoh before he does."

"Right under my noooose!"

"Kaidoh, give him some air!"

"There's a 20 percent chance of Momoshiro passing out now."

Fuji takes another picture.

Momoshiro punches Kaidoh in his stomach, and he's finally relieved of his strong hold on his neck. He gasps for air as he clutches his sore throat. Kaidoh leans against the wall, heaving heavily, his face completely red from embarrassment and anger. He then glares at all of his former team members.

"Yes, Takeshi is my fucking boyfriend—you guys happy now?"

Eiji starts to whine out loud and Oishi blushes awkwardly. Kawamura and Tezuka shuffle away. Fuji just snaps another picture, and Inui writes some more stuff in his notebook. Momoshiro just splutters something incoherent.

When all is said and done, and everyone's leaving to go home, Momoshiro muses on the fact that at least they got some pictures of them together, he asked Fuji to send them through mail.

Kaidoh starts to strangle him again.

oOo

"Oh come on, you can't stay mad at me forever. It wasn't even my fault!"

Kaidoh hisses, but says nothing else.

"And I think the pictures came out pretty good. I look dashingly handsome."

"You mean dashingly retarded."

"Well, that was uncalled for."

Kaidoh plumps down next to Momoshiro on his bed. He sighs; he's not mad. He's just ... anxious. Or something like that. Like there's something gnawing at his stomach and it won't go away. The pictures Fuji sent them didn't turn out too bad either, just that it had captured the most embarrassing moment of his life.

"I should frame this one and put it on my wall," says Momoshiro with a grin. He's holding the one where Kaidoh's face is red and he's yelling at the other guys, while Momoshiro's gasping for breath in the background.

"Like hell you will," he says.

"I'll just cut out myself, and just have you, I should ask Fuji to send me the negatives so that I can get a bigger version of your face."

Kaidoh elbows Momoshiro's side, who counters with a punch in the arm. They briefly get involved in a tussle, but it soon tires them out and they lean against each other while breathing slowly.

"Ah man, I heard Inui-senpai got admitted to Tokyo University!"

"Yes, I was the one that told you, dumbass." He doesn't really want to talk about this.

"And Oishi-senpai is going to medical school—he's really becoming a doctor."

"Aha."

"Eiji-senpai is ... I don't know what the fuck he's doing, but I know he's stalking Oishi-senpai. Then there's Tezuka-senpai, he's going to America as well, the prick. Fuji is going to college, I think he wants to become a professional photographer. Kawamura's taking over his dad's sushi place ... which reminds me; we should go eat there. I'm sure I can score some free stuff out of him."

"Ah," says Kaidoh, only half caring.

"And then there's us."

His stomach twists into a knot again. He can't help it; he's worried and anxious. Everyone's moving on, everyone's doing things with their life. What will become of him and Momoshiro? Sure he's got another year until they graduate, but then what?

"You wanted to go pro, right?" asks Momoshiro.

"Yeah, I think so."

"I'm way too lazy for that," laughs Momoshiro.

"I know, you wouldn't be able to handle it."

"Hey!"

Kaidoh bumps his head against Momoshiro's. He doesn't want to leave, he doesn't want to have a different path in life than Momoshiro. They've always been together since middle school, and now especially, when things are going pretty well, and everything's fucking sunshine, he just doesn't want to let go of it. But everyone's doing different things, and Momoshiro isn't planning on following him anymore.

"Well, I'm probably gonna go to college. I'm sure my mom will force me whether I want to or not."

"You'll probably drop out."

Momoshiro snorts out loud. "Just because you want me to, doesn't mean it's going to happen."

Yeah, he wants it to happen. Drop out, stay with him, don't go anywhere and leave him behind. Just stay.

Momoshiro kisses the side of his head, right underneath his bandana, and he feels a little better. Can't they stay in high school forever?

oOo

"You ready?"

"No."

"Okay, let's go then."

Kaidoh pulls onto Momoshiro's shirt, so that he doesn't go anywhere. He looks at him; he's scared. He doesn't want this to go bad, because if it does, then perhaps it really will all end between them. And they haven't even graduated yet. Momoshiro kisses Kaidoh's forehead, and even though this makes him look like a little kid that needs comforting, he doesn't care, because it is comforting. Momoshiro is Kaidoh's support; he needs him by his side right now.

"I'm right here," he says.

"I know."

"Then let's go." Momoshiro grabs Kaidoh's hand and pulls him along. If he weren't, Kaidoh's sure he wouldn't have been able to walk at all.

They walk down the stairs, into Kaidoh's living room, his mother and father sitting at the dining table, and his brother is watching tv. Kaidoh turns around to walk away, but Momoshiro shoves him into the open, bastard.

He stands next to Momoshiro, the palms of his hands sweaty and sticky, so he nervously clutches his pants to dry them off a bit. He doesn't know what to say, he doesn't know how to start. He doesn't want them to hate him. His entire body feels like ice, frozen to the ground. Chalk stiff and frozen solid. Momoshiro gives him a slight shove with his shoulder and he's back on earth again, unfrozen, and with a support. He opens his mouth to talk, but no words are coming out of it, his throat feels dry like he swallowed a bunch of sand.

"It's okay," whispers Momoshiro.

Kaidoh swallows, then gives him a small nod. "M-mom, dad, I've got something to say," he says in a shaky voice.

His parents look up at him with loving smiles. This makes him even more nervous. He claws at his thighs, he's nervous, he feels like there's a stampede of animals running over his body, and again his mouth if filled with sand.

"I .. I ..." he says, but doesn't quite get any further than that.

"Kaoru, what is it?" asks his mother, a little bit concerned now.

"I want to tell you ... tell you that ..." His head is spinning, he can't make sense of his own words anymore. What is he supposed to do? How can he say this? What will happen? What will happen to him and Momoshiro? He almost lets out a girly shriek when Momoshiro grabs his sweaty and sticky hand. He curls his fingers around it and suddenly he's not alone anymore. He swallows the sand in his throat.

"That Takeshi is my boyfriend."

There, he said it. It's out in the open now. His parents can hate him forever, and Momoshiro can leave him now. Fuck.

"Oh dear!" his mother says with a gasp. She holds a hand in front of her mouth.

Now he's literally frozen; that doesn't sound good. Not at all.

"That was supposed to be a secret?"

Momoshiro snorts out loud, then quickly coughs to cover it up. Kaidoh is slowly thawing out and now he wishes the ground would swallow him up.

Then Hazue walks by. "If it was supposed to be a secret, you guys should learn to lock the door."

"Why you little brat," says Momoshiro darkly and starts chasing after Hazue.

Kaidoh's face is all scrunched up in a bad grimace. He wants to die. Die in a hole, because what the fuck—his mother and brother knew? All along? What the fuck has he been worried about then?

"I want your blessings," he says out loud and determined. Momoshiro stops chasing Hazue and slowly creeps back to Kaidoh's side.

"Kaoru, my boy, if you didn't have our blessings, we would have never let Takeshi step foot in this house," says his father.

"Thank you very much, Kaidoh-san," says Momoshiro politely.

That's it? That's seriously it? That's all it took? For the entire two years, that's it?

Momoshiro grabs Kaidoh's hand again, and he forces him to look at him. "Kaoru, breathe."

And he does. He takes in a deep breath, and lets it out in his traditional snake hiss. Okay, that feels a bit better now. He suddenly feels drained of all his energy, all this build up energy of anxiousness he's been holding onto for a very long time are bubbling up. They slowly leave his body, and he feels as if he hasn't eaten in days. Momoshiro catches on quickly, and he grabs Kaidoh's shoulder so that he won't collapse right then and there. What would he do without his support? He wants to give Momoshiro a smile, to tell him he's okay, but he can't even find enough energy to do that.

"Takeshi, why don't you take him upstairs? He looks kind of sickly. I'll fix you up some snacks," says Kaidoh's mother.

"Will do. Come on, idiot, or did you forget how to walk?"

Kaidoh glares at him; no, he did not forget how to walk—nor how to hit Momoshiro. They struggle together as they walk back up the stairs. He collapses on his bed straight away, completely drained of everything and anything that he ever bottled up. Well, not completely, but most of it.

"You okay?" asks Momoshiro concerned.

Kaidoh props his head up on his pillow and stares at Momoshiro. His support, his better half, the idiot who won't leave him alone, and the idiot who knows when to be serious and hold onto his hand.

"Yeah," he says with a croaky voice.

Momoshiro sits down next to him on his bed, and he starts to rub Kaidoh's back. The energy that had left him just moments ago returns to his body. With each comforting stroke Momoshiro makes, a warm liquid fills his veins. He feels better, a lot better. A lot less worried. He's so worriless, he almost feels like crying. But that's Momoshiro's thing, so he settles on sighing against his pillow and closing his eyes. Momoshiro's hands are still stroking his back, and it feels like he's taking a very warm bath, and he never wants him to stop.

Don't go, don't leave, don't ever stop. Stay, stay forever.

Kaidoh rolls over on his back and stares at Momoshiro, who looks back at him with warm eyes. He grabs his hand, and he pulls it up to his face, so that he can rub his face against the palm of his hand. Momoshiro simply smiles at the action, and cups his entire cheek. The feelings won't stop pouring out of him, and before he knows it, Momoshiro leans forwards and kisses him.

They've kissed a thousand times already; in the club room, in the storage room, in the broom closet, on the streets, in the bathroom, in his bedroom, in Momoshiro's bedroom, they've kissed so much. But nothing, nothing could ever compare to the feeling that's leaking into him from Momoshiro's lips, it fills him up, from head to toe, it's warm and yet rather chilling. It's a feeling that has been slowly building up inside of him, he never noticed it before, but it was there, just waiting to rear its head and make him go flying across the clouds.

Because that's what it feels like right now; he's soaring on a magic carpet with Momoshiro, exploring the sky, the world at the tip of their fingers, and they can do anything they want. No one can stop them, no one can prevent them from being with each other.

Kaidoh sits up straight, but he never leaves Momoshiro's lips; they are his for now. It's gentle, and it's comforting, and that feeling inside of him just keeps building up. They're not even doing anything rough or exiting, just pressing and slowly moving their lips against each other, and yet it's the greatest feeling in the world.

Momoshiro is the greatest feeling in the world.

Everything about him, he wants it. He wants to hold it close. Kaidoh's hands grab onto Momoshiro, everywhere he can touch he does, not leaving a spot to the imagination. Momoshiro responds to his touch as well, and he's also holding onto Kaidoh. Gently, careful, comforting, like the touch of a feather, like a whole bunch of them. Now his arms are behind Kaidoh's neck, and he pulls him closer, to his body, where he melts into it. Nothing else matters to him now, just Momoshiro. Momoshiro and the greatest feeling in the world.

They stop kissing, but only long enough for them to rid themselves of their shirts, and they're back again, kissing softly, sucking, nipping. Their skin is hot to the touch, but it only strengthens the feelings inside of him, he doesn't leave an inch of space between him and Momoshiro, chests sliding across each other, and hands running—exploring all over.

"No, wait," says Momoshiro all of the sudden.

Kaidoh doesn't want to wait, he doesn't let go.

But Momoshiro pulls back completely, and he feels lonely and cold, and please come back.

Momoshiro walks over to his door, then turns the key to lock it, he hops back over to his bed. "Just so your mom gets the hint," he says with a shrug.

Kaidoh laughs, mostly because he's filled with jittery and confusing feelings and he's riding on the clouds, and partly because Momoshiro is just so Momoshiro. And then his lips are back, more forceful, hungrier, lovelier, and please don't ever stop. Their lips move, like a dance, like a beautiful waltz, in tune with his beating and thumping heart. Each thump sends a shock through him, it's like a drug because it's making him high, and he's hardly able to think straight. All he can think about is Momoshiro, Momoshiro, Momoshiro.

Everything is glowing to him, Momoshiro's skin is glowing, like magic, like a fairytale, he doesn't even really know if this is reality anymore. He kisses Momoshiro's arm, leaving more and more kisses, everywhere he can. The expression on Momoshiro's face is pure bliss, and his body shivers and jerks at his touch. More, he wants more. They rid each other of their pants, now only left in their shorts, and on the bed, moving in a rhythm only they can understand. His ears are ringing again, much like the first time from years ago—when everything was still new. It isn't any more, but it feels so much better. So familiar, so high on those drugs.

Kaidoh's body raises up, and it goes down, Momoshiro kisses his chest, his belly, it doesn't really matter what he touches it seems, because it makes Kaidoh squirm either way, leaving him wanting for more. More of Momoshiro. His moans are like a song, one that Momoshiro composes, because each touch creates a different moan, and a different twitch, and this unbearable itch of wanting to get closer and closer.

Momoshiro tugs at Kaidoh's boxers, and he slides them off of his hip. He raises his body so that Momoshiro can take it off entirely, and flings it somewhere behind him. Then he's back, kissing Kaidoh, tongues now swirling and sliding in their mouths. Kaidoh moans when he feels Momoshiro press up against him; he's completely naked, high on Momoshiro's drug, and very, very hard. The last piece of fabric between them annoys him, so he parts from Momoshiro.

"Take it off," he murmurs. He doesn't want to be the only one who's naked, he wants to see Momoshiro as well.

Momoshiro continues to kiss Kaidoh, never leaving his lips, but he fumbles around, trying to get out of his black boxers. Kaidoh half registers that those are his, but then he's back thinking about Momoshiro again. That guy is just filling his mind, threatening to spill over if something isn't done about it soon. Finally the last piece of clothing is gone, and they're naked on the bed, Kaidoh underneath Momoshiro, rocking back and forth in the same rhythm still.

"Ah!" Kaidoh yelps when Momoshiro bites his neck. He winces his eyes shut, and claws at Momoshiro's back; biting has never felt so good. They do it a lot of times, it hurts, but it feels good, especially when Momoshiro does it. He'll like anything Momoshiro does right about now.

His teeth nibble on his sensitive neck, like he's some sort of prey—not that Kaidoh minds. Oh no, he can nibble on him as much as he wants, it feels fucking fantastic, and it turns him on even more.

Returning the favour, Kaidoh bites Momoshiro's neck as well, not even starting out gently.

"Shit," wheezes out Momoshiro and his body half collapses on him.

He leaves a bunch of bitemarks that make Momoshiro freeze up, he simply concentrates on the pleasure that Kaidoh gives him. Then he kisses the bitten spots, which he knows Momoshiro likes as well. First biting, then kissing, it's strange, but it's how they work, how they move, how it makes them feel the best. Except everything is feeling a lot better right now, every touch is hyper sensitive, and feels ten times better than before.

Especially when Momoshiro's hard penis shifts against his own, and they simultaneously gasp out loud.

Kaidoh is about to worm his hand in between them, to stroke him, but Momoshiro moves away from his face, down his chest, towards his hips. And then he hovers above his erect penis, and he can literally feel Momoshiro's heavy breath hit it. He's half high still, and half self-conscious, because they've never done that before. Self-conscious thoughts are pushed into oblivion when Momoshiro's tongue licks the tip of the glans. Kaidoh digs his fingers into the mattress, and it takes a huge amount of effort to not thrust his hips upwards in response.

"Takeshi," he says worried. He doesn't want Momoshiro to do anything he doesn't want to, despite it feeling really really good, and he sort of wants to push Momoshiro's head down on it.

Momoshiro simply answers by putting his lips on the top of his penis. Kaidoh sucks in a deep and harsh breath and feels tingly and shaky. Momoshiro parts his lips, and his warm breath feels so fucking good, but his lips sliding all the way down feels even better. It's extremely wet and hot, and all the muscles in his body just keep twitching.

So that's how he ends up grabbing the back of Momoshiro's head, his fingers running through his sticky hair, as he bobs his head up and down, slowly, like torture.

"Fshuuuu," Kaidoh hisses. Do it faster, damnit.

As if he knew what he was thinking, Momoshiro does. His wet lips slide all the way down, and then back up, and he sucks at the tip and Kaidoh's rolling around, writhing and squirming and letting out gasps and moans at the same time. It's just so wet and warm, and it's Momoshiro, so Kaidoh knows he's not going to last long at all. Not at all. Momoshiro's hands are on his thigh, and he sucks some more and goes faster, until he's pulling everything out of Kaidoh. All his muscles tighten, right as Momoshiro's lips tighten around him, and he scratches the back of Momoshiro's head, calling out his name, and he shudders violently as he comes into his mouth. Spasm after spasm, and his head is in the clouds, and he lets out a long drawn out hiss as he spills his seed completely.

Momoshiro pulls back, the sensation still feeling good as he does, and he gags a little bit, then spits out Kaidoh's sperm in his hands. Kaidoh's feeling too sticky and good to care about that right now. He can see Momoshiro rolling off of the bed and grabbing some tissues out of his drawer, but again, he's only half paying attention, because he's seeing stars explode in front of his eyes.

"That felt good," he says blissfully.

"Yeah? I bet," responds Momoshiro. He cleans his mouth, and then climbs back on Kaidoh's bed, and kisses him.

Kaidoh kisses him back, and despite finding it rather gross that those lips were just touching his penis, Kaidoh enjoys it either way. It's Momoshiro's turn now, not because he feels indebted, but because he wants to make him feel good too. Make him feel so good he'll scream out his name. But not too loud, since his entirely family is downstairs.

"Lie down," Kaidoh says, giving a slight push against Momoshiro's shoulder.

He obeys without complaint, and Kaidoh's on top of him, kissing him, then biting his neck (which earns him scratches on his back), and traveling down. Now he's at the same position Momoshiro was in not that long ago. He sees his red and hard penis sticking up straight, throbbing, and just waiting to be touched.

He uses his hands first, simply because he likes the soft skin of it, his fingers trailing it up and down.

"Nnghh," Momoshiro lets out, trying to hold back. Kaidoh tries not to smirk; it must feel like torture after being turned on for so long.

All of his fingers wrap around his penis, and he pulls the skin up, and then down—just giving him a little bit more torture. He enjoys seeing Momoshiro squirm, he enjoys seeing Momoshiro enjoy it. After teasing Momoshiro for a few more seconds, he finally leans down and takes it into his mouth. It's hard and soft at the same time, and it tastes very salty and sweaty, kind of musky. His lips slide over the entire penis, all the way down, until it's at the back of his throat, and any more, and he'll gag.

"Ah, Kaoru," moans Momoshiro, who's probably in 7th heaven by now.

Kaidoh lifts his head, and his lips slide up, and then down, and he continues to do this motion until Momoshiro's being loud and moaning, and then he thrust his hips up, gagging Kaidoh by going too far, and he comes into his mouth as well. Kaidoh immediately lets go, coughing and spitting out the salty sperm that's dripping from his mouth. He sees Momoshiro tremble and shiver, he's probably out for now, so he grabs some of his left over tissues and spits the rest of it in there, and cleans himself up some more.

"Sorry," says Momoshiro, he's looking at him now, his eyes glazed over.

"It's okay," says Kaidoh and he wipes his mouth, his own penis, then Momoshiro's. He's already limp, but Momoshiro's still only half way.

He flings the tissues away, then lies down on his bed next to Momoshiro, and cuddles up next to him. Their naked bodies stick to each other like glue, since they're so sweaty. They're both breathing heavily, and they feel good, a bit sticky, but good. Kaidoh puts his arm on Momoshiro's stomach, and Momoshiro does the same. He closes his eyes and leans his head against Momoshiro's neck, the side with bite marks all over it.

It just feels so good. Of course, the orgasm was fantastic, and he's probably going to be begging for some more blowjobs now, but this, just holding each other after doing something like that, it's ... it's ... he doesn't quite know how to explain. It's just a very comfortable state, it's stable and it's strong, and he likes the cuddling. There's just no pretence between them like this, just Kaidoh and Momoshiro. Two gay guys who just had sex, cuddling.

"Takeshi?" he calls out.

He can hear Momoshiro's heavy breathing, and he opens his eyes to look at him. It seems he's asleep. Well, he does feel rather sleepy too, since it's so comfortable, and being with Momoshiro made him sleepy too. Just being with Momoshiro period makes everything feel better. He hugs Momoshiro's body closer; he doesn't ever want to let go. No, Momoshiro's is his, his forever, he ... he ...

"I love you."

Yeah. That about sums it up alright.

Kaidoh falls asleep soon afterwards, thinking of nothing but the comfortable state he was in, and that he's finally accepted that special part of him and Momoshiro.

When he wakes up, he's alone. Naked on his bed. He looks around; it's morning, and Momoshiro is not in his room. His clothes are gone too. That comfortable feeling of yesterday is immediately yanked out of his body as the panic settles in. Where's Momoshiro? Did he leave? Why? Why'd he leave without saying anything? Then he sees the note on his night stand, along with his black boxers, neatly folded. The note has got Momoshiro's hand writing on it. He quickly picks it up.

Gone to America. Bye, Kaoru-chan.

Kaidoh blinks at it, then reads it again, and he thinks it's a joke. Until he calls Momoshiro's mother and she tells him Momoshiro took the train towards Osaka just hours ago, saying something about finding an airport.

Seriously?

Without even thinking about it, Kaidoh chases after Momoshiro, taking the first train he gets and goes to Osaka.

oOo

"What the fuck were you thinking?"

Momoshiro is sitting on the edge of the sidewalk, looking up with a goofy grin at Kaidoh. They're in the middle of fucking nowhere. "You found me," he says.

"Yes, after scourging the city, shoving your stupid picture in people's faces, yes I fucking found you after three hours."

"Is it the picture in which I look dashingly handsome?"

"Takeshi," Kaidoh growls, he doesn't have the patience for games anymore. "Explain yourself now, or I won't be able to control myself and you will get another broken nose."

"Geez, calm down. No need to be so angry."

Kaidoh splutters and hisses and angrily stomps over to Momoshiro, who throws his hands above his head to protect himself.

"Okay, okay! I was running off to go to America."

"You're in Osaka."

"Okay, I didn't get that far," he grumbles.

"What the hell were you thinking?"

"I wasn't? Or I was? I don't know. I just had to clear my mind a little bit, and test something out."

"Test what out?"

"I heard you, you know."

"Heard what?"

"I wasn't asleep. Well, okay, I was half asleep, but it's not like you were whispering it. I heard it loud and clear."

"Oh ..."

"And I sort of ... freaked."

"Understatement of the year."

"Shut up. I've been thinking a lot lately, you know? About us, about you, and especially what would happen if your parents wouldn't accept us."

"Ah."

"And then I started thinking; well even if they do, that doesn't mean much. Everyone's going off to college, and I will too, and you'll go do your stupid pro thing in a year, and we'll be separated. What would happen then? Do we part and go different ways? Well, I don't, I don't want to be apart, so I wanted to see what it would be like if I was away from you, and I came here."

"And?"

"Oh it was awful, I used up all my money getting here, and then I wandered around trying to find the meaning of life and everything, and then I got really hungry, but I'm broke and couldn't buy anything, and I think I might have dug through someone's trash to find food. But I could have been hallucinating that part."

"No you idiot, what's it like being away from me?"

"Oh. Yeah. That." Beat. "It sucks."

"You seriously had to go to Osaka to figure that out?"

"Okay, I admit it wasn't the greatest idea ..."

"Again, understatement of the fucking year."

"Shut up, asshole. It's all because of you. I couldn't stop thinking about you. Why'd you have to go and mess up my head."

"I didn't do anything."

"Exactly, you don't even try. It's like you're flaunting it, really." He raises his voice. "Look at me, I'm Kaoru-chan and I won't stop bugging you. I'll dig myself deep inside of you and won't let go. Fuck."

"That's creepy."

"I know."

"Did you seriously dig through some trash?"

"I don't know, I was half thinking about hamburgers, and half thinking about sucking you off."

"..."

"Oh don't give me that look, we both know what we did last night."

"Takeshi."

"And wow, it's getting me hard already just thinking about it. But you know, it's all your fault. Why'd you have to go and say something like that. While I'm sleeping no less!"

"Takeshi."

"Couldn't you at least wait till I was awake? It doesn't matter I was actually awake at that time, what matters is that you were being sneaky and said it without me being able to say anything back."

"Takeshi ..."

"Of course you had to say it first. Bastard."

"I'm talking to a wall."

"Yes you are, bastard, that's what you get for saying it first."

"Fuck you."

"Fuck you too—well, maybe later?"

"Why don't you stop day dreaming for a second, and just give me a reply already."

"Why? I want to hear you saying you're sorry first."

"For what?"

"For saying it while I'm asleep!"

"What's wrong with that!"

"Everything! Bastard! Making me feel all lightheaded and jumpy, and I couldn't do anything about it because I was supposed to be asleep!"

"You could have said something!"

"No, that would have made me look stupid!"

"You are fucking stupid, you moron."

"I don't want to hear that from you, asshole!"

"Stop avoiding it!"

"Fuck you!"

"Fshuuuu."

"Stop hissing."

"Stop being a moron."

"Okay fine! I'll say it! I'll fucking say it!"

"Okay, go."

"Can you turn around first? I don't like that look on your face."

"This is just how I look."

"Exactly, you're giving me the creeps."

"Say it!"

"Argh! For two years, two years!"

"Three."

"Has it been three?"

"Two and a half, probably."

"Okay ... For two and a half years! I've been trying for two and a half years not to say anything at all. But fine, here you go: I love you! There, I said it! I fucking love you. Completely and utterly in love with you! I've been trying so hard to never say that out loud, or to even acknowledge it ... but there you have it. I'm gonna go jump off of a bridge now, 'kay."

"You're such a moron."

"Yeah but, hey, you love this moron."

"Yes I do."

"... Okay, I didn't expect you to agree with it so easily. That sort of hurt. Asshole. Wait—did I hear that right? Do you really love me?"

"Yes ..."

"Oh okay, I was just making sure I'm not hallucinating or something. Yeah, hehe, because that would be one hell of a prank if it were. Fuck."

"Let's go back home, stupid."

"Okay. Hey, do you love me?"

"I would very much love to punch you right now."

"Yeah but, you love me right?"

"Takeshi."

"Wahh, don't hit me, don't hit me!"

"I love you. Fshuuuu."

"Oh okay. Just making sure. Hey, can you pinch me? OWW! I SAID PINCH, NOT PUNCH!"

"Didn't sound like it."

"Prick."

"Let's go home already."

"Okay. Hey Kaoru."

"What? I'm not going to hold your hand."

"I didn't even say anything!"

"Good."

"Not like I wanted to."

"Good."

As if it's magic, their fingers slip together—they don't even need to look.

The magic is quickly broken when Kaidoh feels his fingers touch a cluster of Ketchup between Momoshiro's fingers. He wasn't hallucinating.