Chapter 4: What Does Your Heart Say?
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~ C & B ~
The inside of his bottom lip burned and he only dug his teeth in deeper. The ache was comforting. It was something he could cling to as his anxiety grew more by the second. Another stack of papers was set to the side and the rhythmic beat of the stapler matched the nervous twitch in his knee.
The woman hadn't looked up at him once.
She flipped through her papers, jotting down random notes and highlighting words he couldn't even define. For a half hour now he'd been sitting here, waiting to hear back from this woman about the progress of his adoption. It had been two months and though most people seeking an adoption wouldn't have heard back this quickly, his name and reputation had pushed him to the top of the list.
Fame is good for something, after all!
Finally gray eyes met blue, the woman sending a practiced smile his way, "Mr. Keller, I have some good news and I have some bad news. The good news is, we're sending someone out to interview your friends, family, work friends. Pretty much anyone who knows you and could tell us if you'd be a good fit for this."
"And the bad news?" he questioned softly, teeth digging again into soft flesh.
"The bad news," she started, reaching back into her file and pulling out a few magazine clippings, "is that even though your name got you this far into the adoption, your name is also hurting you. You have quite the reputation, Mr. Keller. And not a good one."
Brows furrowed, "But everyone has a past."
Her brow rose a little, clearly uninterested in whatever sob story she felt he was about to feed her, "True. But not everyone's past is posted all over the tabloids. There are rumors of drugs, promiscuous activity, alcohol abuse. This isn't looking good for you."
"Most of those are lies!" his voice rose a little more than he intended and the woman frowned deeply, making a note.
"Don't write that down! I-I'm just frustrated. I can't help what the papers post about me."
"No," she agreed, not a hint of sympathy in her eyes, clearly all business, "you can't control the tabloids. But you can control yourself. You need to prove to child protective services that you're fit to be a parent. No more partying. No sleeping around."
She stacked her papers mechanically, "You need to be perfect. One false step and you'll be lucky to even be allowed to try this again. You only get one shot here."
Chris swallowed hard and nodded his head, messy hair falling in his eyes, "When will I know how the interviews go?"
The woman shrugged one shoulder in a dainty manner, "I will call you as soon as I've been told whether to proceed or not. It could be days, weeks, or even months. Just be patient and like I said, stay on your best behavior. One red flag could end this for you."
The boy nodded, a nervous pit building in his stomach the more this woman talked. She said each thing so bluntly, as if it was simply business and not the rest of his life they were talking about. He stood a while later and let himself out, tugging nervously at a stray string on his jeans. He glanced over at a familiar building and contemplated for a moment before finally making his way over, not seeing a single important reason not to.
~ C & B ~
Brooke let the pencil hang from her mouth absentmindedly as she looked over the sketches spread out over her desk. Slowly her eyes slid over every single picture and every single detail. It had to be perfect considering the Wicked Bitch of North Carolina was hovering over Brooke like some creep, waiting impatiently for a decision to be made.
"I'll pick…" Brooke began slowly, her sentence trailing over when she looked up to hear her office door opening and in coming a somewhat casual Chris Keller.
"Oh for heaven's sake," Victoria muttered as she stepped in front of the desk and took the coffee cup out of Chris's hand. "Christian, as much as we love your presence, it's not needed today. Shoo, shoo."
"Christopher," he corrected in the same casual tone he always used with the woman. He snatched the cup back and set it in front of Brooke, eyes trailing over Victoria in that way he knew usually had her leaving the room in a string of curses after only a few moments.
"Looking lovely as always, Vicki. You can hardly notice your age in that dress suit."
Brooke watched on in amusement from behind her desk and sent Chris a wink as she sipped her coffee.
Impressive, he remembers my favorite flavor more than I do.
"You can hardly notice that arrogant ego," Victoria said back, giving him a look of disdain. She laughed lightly and reached over to grab her purse off of one of the chairs sitting in front of Brooke's desk. "Have a decision to me by the end of the day or I choose."
Brooke watched as Victoria left and she laughed lightly at her desk, brushing off Victoria's negative energy as quickly as she possible could. "Free extra foam coffee. And to what do I owe this wonderful gesture?"
"I met with the adoption agency again today."
And it went horribly.
"It went okay, I guess," he said softly, shaking his head as he plopped down in front of her desk. "Apparently my professional reputation could stop this adoption before it ever even really gets going."
He slumped down and stared up at the ceiling. "They're going to be calling all my friends and family soon to get a feel of what type of guy I am. So as long as they don't talk to Peyton or any of the millions of people I've pissed off in this town, I may have a shot at getting my kid."
"You could always pull a Michael Jackson," Brooke teased lightly, a frown forming over her calm features when she noticed his facial expression didn't budge even for a joke. She sat down in her seat and leaned forward on the desk, "Come on. Don't worry about it. The worst that can possibly happen is Clay being interviewed and he turns the interview into a question and answer about himself."
She leaned forward on the desk even further and placed a comforting hand on top of his, giving him a reassuring smile when their eyes met, "Even your biggest enemies know you're a great guy. And you'd be a great father. Trust me, you'll be okay."
He nodded and let out a calming breath, "I know, I know, I'm just getting nervous. The more into this I get, the more barriers that pop up to stop me. I'm just really nervous. I met the little boy I'd be adopting a couple days ago and he's just so awesome. We played with ninja turtles and he told me stories. I just want it to work so bad."
He stole the coffee he'd just brought her, taking a sip before handing it back, "His name is Michael, by the way. He's four and both his parents just passed away. It's the saddest thing in the world, but that kid is just filled with smiles."
If only we could all be more like that.
Hazel eyes softened at the description and the brunette swallowed hard. How could anyone that young go through life without parents because they were snatched away?
When she was about to speak, she stopped herself and examined the pair of blue eyes before her that seemed to sparkle a little extra at the talk of Michael. Chris Keller was definitely ready to become a father. It was now or never.
"He's gonna be the luckiest kid ever. Michael Keller. Eh, doesn't sound nearly as heart throbbing as Chris Keller."
"Oh finally admitting you're into me?" he teased, fingers tapping her palm against the table, "All it took was the thought of Chris Keller as a single father and you can't get enough. Feel free to come see me in action anytime you want."
He laughed, eyes sparkling more as he stole her coffee again.
"Have you ever thought about kids?"
Brooke was about to make a smartass remark about how she wouldn't throw away her figure over a whining baby but she stopped herself. In all honesty, the brunette was great with kids. At least she was great with her cousins' kids. And for someone that couldn't cook the greatest that was good enough for her.
"They're amazing." Her smile widened when his did and she sat up straighter.
"They just have this way of making someone's day better. They don't have to understand you're having a shitty day. They'll just be all, 'Look, I wanna color. Let's color together' and then you just go and color."
His smile widened and his eyes lit up, "Would you color with my kid? I'm not a very good colorer and I'd hate for Michael not to have anyone to teach him how to stay in the lines."
Brooke couldn't help but snort and she nodded her head, "Well duh. Clearly your kid is gonna need to be all artsy so he might as well learn from the best."
The brunette grabbed a file and stood up, shoving it into the filing cabinet before turning to him. "Soooo, me and Luke haven't really talked. For a while. Have you been keeping in touch?"
"We were," he started, making a face, "until he started spending all his times with Voldemort. Also known as my ex wife, in case you were confused."
He shook his head in annoyance, glancing at her face as he spoke, "He said you knew about them hanging out and stuff, but I still think it's completely shitty of him. How are you holding up with all that?"
He fixed his stare on her seriously, "Be honest."
Brooke's eyes stayed glued to his and she opened her mouth to speak.
Honest doesn't necessarily mean tell everything you're feeling, Brookie. Just be simple.
"I just… don't know." His eyes looked disbelieving and she frowned.
Oh to heck with simplicity.
Her voice came out quiet and soft, yet very sure of itself. "Something inside of me is telling me not to trust him with Peyton. At first, I avoided seeing him because I knew the second I did, he'd just go on and on about how perfect and beautiful and talented Peyton was. Then, it just became a habit to exclude him from my everyday life."
"The entire last year of my marriage I had that same feeling. I knew in my heart that I couldn't trust her, but I stayed anyway. Well, we all know how that ended."
His eyes roamed her face slowly, "I'm not saying that Lucas is going to do something, but I think if you feel the need to cut him out because he might, then maybe you should rethink things."
He gave her a soft smile, both remembering when she'd been the one to give him this exact advice months ago about Peyton. "If you can't trust him, then why are you still with him, Dimples? You deserve better than holding onto something that doesn't even feel real to you anymore."
"It can get better," Brooke said, trying to convince Chris and herself at the same time with those words.
She shook her head then and gave Chris a curious look, "What do I deserve then? A prince? A knight in shining armor? Those guys don't exist."
"Says who?"
He raised his brow and leaned forward, voice soft but still firm, "It's not about finding a prince. It's about finding someone who does more than just say that they love you. They have to show it too. They have to be willing to put up with all your crazy and all your insecurities. They have to be able to deal with your dragon of a mother. You just deserve a chance to be happy, that's all I'm saying."
Brooke laughed lightly at the description of her mother before nodding her head, "Well, when you find someone who's willing to do that, drop him off here."
"I don't think it'd be hard at all to find someone like that," he countered quietly, "You're you."
Brooke looked Chris over for a second, something in his words sounding different then what they usually sounded. She brushed it off and took a seat next to him on the same side of the desk. "Would you put up with it all?"
"Haven't you noticed I already do?" He licked his bottom lip and shrugged one shoulder slowly, trying to get control of his voice before he gave too much away.
She's still Lucas's girl.
And Lucas is still your best friend. Shut up!
"Yeah, but that's because you're my best friend," Brooke spoke softly, smiling slightly. "Does Chris Keller think he can handle me on an even higher level?"
He raised his brow, casual smirk sliding over his lips, "Chris Keller can handle anything. Don't underestimate him."
Brooke laughed loudly and shook her head, glancing up at the clock before standing up from the seat across her desk. "Right, of course. How could I forget?" She sent him a wink and grabbed her purse, "I have a meeting, Keller. I'll see you around."
She leaned down and brushed her lips over his forehead, her voice comforting and soft, "And remember, don't let the adoption process and your reputation get you nervous. You're great."
~ C & B ~
"That was great," Peyton said, her finger pushed down on the speaker, looking past the clear glass that separated her currently signed band and herself. "We'll pick it up tomorrow."
And with one last confidence filled smile, the curly blonde was out of the room and back into her office.
This was just another ordinary day for Peyton Sawyer, formerly Keller. Get to work, be kickass at work, and then bring work home with her so that way she can be kickass when she went in the next day. Work seemed to always come first in the long run of whatever Peyton was dealing with in life. It was her own escape, and lately that escape was also being shared with someone else.
Someone that was bad news.
"Peyton!"
Speak of the devil.
"Luke!" Her smile widened instantly and a sense of warmth washed over her at the charm of his smile. "Surprise seeing you here."
"Not really," Lucas said with a light laugh, giving his watch a quick check before he walked over to her. "We scheduled lunch, remember?"
Peyton's smile only widened and she nodded her head. Who cares if she remembered or not? He was offering free food and he was Lucas Scott. Two of Peyton's biggest weaknesses. And so the two went, going to their usual restaurant and sitting at their usual table with their usual food.
"So how are you and Brooke?" Peyton asked after a few minutes into their meal. With that question, she could see his baby blues go a little darker than usual. Something was up. "Not so good?"
"She's still ignoring my calls. She usually picks up at the first ring whenever I call," Lucas said, not trying to sound too disappointed. He brushed Brooke off as if she was nothing and focused on the girl before him. Whether he liked it or not, Peyton always ended up growing on him. They were always best friends no matter what. Whenever Brooke was brought up, he always dodged it. The guilt that seeped in was too overwhelming.
He knew what he was doing.
He was falling for his best friend's ex-wife and holding onto Brooke, hoping that one day that spark that they had way back in high school would rise again and his small crush on Peyton would dissipate.
But the more he hung out with Peyton, and the less he hung out with Brooke, the less likely that seemed to happen.
"You okay?"Peyton asked with a light laugh, sliding a fry into her mouth. "Hello, earth to Lucas Scott."
Baby blues blinked back into orbit and Lucas nodded his head, giving Peyton's leg a light kick from underneath the table. "I'm great."
"Good," Peyton said softly, trying not to show her blush as she slid another fry into her mouth. "I'm sure she'll call sooner or later. She's just probably busy with work or something. Kinda like us." She sent him a wink and sat back in her seat. Peyton Sawyer was falling for her ex best friend's current boyfriend aka her ex-husband's best friend.
What is going on here?