A/N: Downhill stretch guys! I'm pretty sure I don't need to say this but Michelle=Seychelles & Eduard=Estonia.

Chapter Eighteen

Matthew stuffed the last piece of clothing in his suitcase and zipped it up. He was sure he had everything, but that's what he thought the last three times he zipped it shut. Putting his suitcase by the door, he wandered back towards Alfred's room to see if he was even packing yet. He wasn't. He was too busy chatting on the phone, throwing clothing out behind him, seeking the perfect whatever.

"Al."

Alfred ignored him and laughed into the phone. A sparkly thong flew through the air and hooked on Matthew's glasses. He squeaked and threw it off him. That was so gross.

"Alfred!"

Alfred whipped around, dropping the phone, and glared at Matthew in irritation.

"What?"

"Why aren't you ready?"

Alfred sighed, "I was talking to Toris."

Matthew rolled his eyes. Why did he agree to this? Oh yeah, he loved winter sports. It was almost a race to see who could say yes faster when Roderich invited the twins to his family's mountain ski retreat. Alfred wasn't big on cold but he loved snowboarding even though he'd rather be on the lake in summer.

So he was about to get in a van full of people to spend the weekend of skiing and playing around before Christmas. Roderich had pretty much given Alfred free reign to invite some friends and Matthew wondered if he had realized what a 'few friends' meant to Alfred. Because somehow it turned into Ivan, Katerina, Toris, Natalia, and Feliks. This was in addition to those Roderich had personally invited: Liz, Ludwig, Sophie, and Gilbert (Matthew was sure the latter was purely out of obligation). Luckily the his invites were going in a separate car. Matthew was glad he wasn't going to be stuck in the car with Gilbert, Roderich, and Liz for several hours, and he wondered if they were planning to drug Gilbert.

He hoped so, for everyone's sanity. And Gilbert's braincells.

"Alfred!"

"Yeah, yeah, don't get your panties in a twist." Alfred mumbled dragging out a huge duffel bag. It looked like he decided to bring his sock drawer. Matthew didn't comment on how he was packing light because Alfred would probably beam and take it as a compliment.

The trip up wasn't too bad despite being squished between Ivan and Feliks in the back seats of the van (because the two couldn't be trusted to touch without vicious pinching and whining). Toris and Alfred sat up front, Toris driving of course, and the girls sat in the middle. Alfred wanted to sit in the back and so did Natalia. Ivan had refused to get in the vehicle to until the seating had been rearranged.

"Ooo, such a cute puppy." Katerina cooed over Aster, who thumped his huge tail against the side of her seat. He gave her a sloppy kiss, making her squeal, while both Natalia and Ivan glared at the Great Dane puppy.

"Alfred, why is there a dog in the van with us?" Toris asked.

Alfred laughed, "Because Aster is awesome. And because we have to take him up because Roderich won't let him in their car. Something about too many dogs or whatever."

Matthew could see why Roderich would have a fit about all of Ludwig's dogs. Actually, they were only bringing two of their dogs, Beck and Blackie, but Gilbert whined and pleaded to have 'his' dog come too. But Aster tended to slobber, so it was no wonder he was banished to the van where he wouldn't offend Roderich's sensitivities towards drool goo and dog farts.

Matthew wondered what he would do if he and Liz ever had a baby. He giggled at the idea of Roderich holding the baby at arm's length wearing rubber gloves and a facial mask. Ivan looked down questioningly and Matthew shrugged, struggling to hide his smile. Ivan gave a smile back and Matthew felt warm tickles that made him blush. He snuck his hand into Ivan's, carefully hiding it from Natalia's view, and gave a small squeeze.

Just because they had gotten Francis back, Matthew wasn't quite ready to give up Ivan's rights as boyfriend. He knew Alfred and Ivan had planned a big "break-up" to be staged during the vacation with as many witnesses as possible, but he hoped they would forget their stupid plan.

How'd he get suckered into the master plan of the two most manipulative people in town?

Oh yeah, because he had a handsome, sweet Russian boyfriend at his beck and call. Mostly. Enough. Well, at least in public. He wouldn't mind a bit more action in the private sector. Or a lot more action. Or any action really. Please, please, any action would be good. He could barely keep his hands off Ivan as it was, all he needed was a little encouragement. And much to his frustration, Ivan was chastely patting his head and holding his hand like they were twelve.

He yawned and swayed. He had been too excited about the slopes to sleep much the night before and looking out at the boring mountainside, his eyelids felt heavy. Jerking his head up, he tried to lean back. It made his neck hurt and he ended up leaning forward. Eventually he ended up leaning down towards his lap.

"Matvey," Ivan whispered softly. Matthew's head jerked up and he looked at Ivan blurrily. "Here."

Matthew barely processed Natalia's glare as he gratefully nestled into Ivan's warm side. Feliks was clicking madly on his cellphone, Katerina was sleeping against Natalia, and Alfred was chatting with Toris. Matthew felt safe and comfortable but he felt Ivan's big fingers run through his hair before falling back.

The next thing he knew his head thunked down on the cushioned seat. He whimpered and saw the tail end of Ivan's scarf and Natalia's skirt flash out the door. Followed by a big, happy dog, a big, happy boy, a cross-dresser, and a girl with boobs that would make a cow jealous. Only Toris was left, dutifully turning off the car and pulling the parking brake up.

"We here?" Matthew mumbled and yawned. He wished Ivan had at least unbuckled him before dropping him on his head. Then he wouldn't have had his body practically cut in half by the seat belt.

"Yes," Toris smiled, "I think everyone was getting restless, so it's good we got here when we did. Alfred was about to start serenading with Elvis."

No wonder everyone vacated so quickly. Matthew was forced to marvel at his own mad sleeping skills. He'd probably be bleeding out the ears while he was unconscious. His internal head trauma would kill millions of braincells and he'd snore away.

Yawning again, he staggered out of the van to help Toris with the baggage. He grabbed a few bags, grunting at Alfred's undoubted fifteen outfits, and went towards the door. He almost made it when he felt someone lift the bags off him. He hung on stubbornly, sure it was either Ivan or Alfred (and considering he was doing work, he highly doubted it was Alfred).

"I got it." Matthew said. This seemed to be a nasty backlash to Ivan being his boyfriend. And Matthew had a sinking feeling that somehow it was his fault, but he didn't tell Ivan to treat him like a retarded 4 year old. Suddenly Ivan didn't see him as another equal, independent guy; he saw Matthew as his boyfriend. And for some bizarre reason that made Matthew a weak, ballsless girl who needed the door held open and a jacket to step over puddles. Really, he could definitely sympathize with feminists after this nasty little revelation.

He barely stepped out of the way as Alfred and Feliks tore past. Alfred was laughing obnoxiously and waving a pink something or other around over his head. Feliks was shouting in outrage before he gave up panting and went to whine at Toris about Alfred's behavior.

"We are going ice skating. Would Matvey like to come?" Katerina asked holding a pair of skates with Ivan and Natalia behind her. Matthew wondered if they would've left him to freeze to death in the car if he hadn't woken up. And where'd they get the skates so fast? Surely Roderich didn't just… he looked where Katerina was pointing and saw an entire closet organized with skates.

At the risk of appearing to be a rude, poor boy, his jaw dropped.

Ivan handed him a pair of skates, "12 is Matvey's size, da?"

Matthew normally would've thanked him and thought nothing of it, but now he was wondering if Ivan only fetched his skates because that's what boyfriends did. He snatched them somewhat gracelessly and said thank you. Ivan scowled for half a second, probably sensing his insincerity, then teased, "Matvey had quite big feet for such a little body."

"That's why we call him Big Foot." Alfred hooted, streaking past. Matthew wondered who was stupid enough to give him Monster this time. He shook his head, "No one calls me Big Foot, Al."

"We do now!" Zoom. Alfred dove into the closet head first and came out with skates. He then zipped past again before skittering to a stop at the door, fumbling for his gloves and hat.

"Roderich said that they will be arriving later tonight." Toris informed everyone, hanging up. Matthew sort of found it odd that Roderich had invited Alfred (probably he was supposed to invite Matthew but forgot, so he invited them both), yet Toris ended up taking care of all the details, driving, unlocking the hide-away key, and fielding all the communication efforts. And Toris didn't even know Roderich. Or Ludwig. He knew Gilbert (and was not a rabid fan), but who didn't? He idly wondered if this was the story of Toris' life: the doomed responsible one.

It made him feel a tiny bit better.

The group headed down to the pond on the property and were surprised to find several people already skating on it.

"Is that Berwald?" Matthew asked Ivan. He immediately felt stupid for asking. Who else would be over 6 feet of scary and that nimble on the ice unless Berwald had a twin brother.

"Yeah, and there's Tino!" Alfred grinned lecherously, "He's got himself a sweetheart."

Matthew was quite sure that several hefty bets were lost in the instant because Tino was certainly not sucking face with Berwald. Matthew made a note to double check his bet with the bookie because he was sure he was owed some big bucks. And unless it was an open relationship, Tino was having a crazy affair while Berwald accompanied another two figures on the ice.

"Heeeeeeeeeeeeey guuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuysss!" Alfred screamed at them, waving frantically. He only yelped when he was shot at.

"Who the hell are you?" An angry blonde stormed up the hill with a shotgun. He scowled darkly as Alfred tried to get his gun to look at it. Alfred did seem to have a fascination with weapons of any kind.

"Uh, I'm Toris, and we're Roderich's guests. Who are you?" Toris asked slightly behind Ivan. Ivan peered down unimpressed at the shotgun toting stranger.

"Vash," the guy grunted and lowed his gun out of Alfred's reach. Thank god, Alfred had enough dangerous potential without bullets and firearms. By that time Berwald had wandered up to hulk behind the gun-toting guy. He peered down and mumbled a greeting, "Berwald, these are friends of yours?"

"M'stly."

"Oh, hi guys!" Tino puffed up after the other two. He looked flushed and glanced out of the corner of his eye at the other two that had followed them up. Matthew stared at a girl that looked startlingly similar to the gun-bearing guy. He assumed they were siblings. She hid shyly behind Berwald and the crazy gun-toter, looking at them. The last member of the group wore glasses and looked fairly inconspicuous.

"T-Toris…" he sputtered and turned into a frozen-looking tomato. Toris looked equally stunned, "Eduard, I thought you were with Raivis."

"He went to spend the weekend with Peter." Eduard fidgeted, "I suppose you saw— " he waved his hand in a vague gesture, "Er, this is my boyfriend Tino. Tino, this is my brother Toris."

Tino waved slightly and Toris gave a weak smile. Matthew just wanted to shout in happiness that life wasn't just fucking over him.

"Yeah, yeah, hi everyone: I'm Alfred! Now let's go skate!" Alfred was practically dancing in place until his speech ended. Then he bolted down towards the pond grabbing poor Toris on his way down. Vash grunted and Berwald made one of his weird noises and that seemed to be that.

Matthew sat on the edge of the pond watching everyone, still a little groggy.

He watched as Alfred whirled and bowed to Natalia. She turned her head away but grudgingly held out a hand. He gently seized it and led her across the ice. Despite being a crazy stalker, Matthew had to admit they looked good together. It was a little demoralizing to see his perfectly handsome brother lazily gliding over the ice with a Playboy model-worthy girl on his arm. Then again, she seemed to help him reign in some of his crazier, hyperactive antics. He was… gentler, calmer, more focused. So not the captain of the football team, party animal, barely passing university because he was distracted Alfred that Matthew was used to.

Tino and Eduard decided to forgo any more making out while big brother was around and were skating around talking, hand in hand. Although they looked pretty normal compared to the other couple on the ice. Berwald towered over Vash's sister. He looked like the snow monster about to eat the sacrificial maiden. Until she gave him a little push and a laugh and took off across the ice. He stood there for a moment before taking off after her. Berwald was known on the rink for his slow, methodical defense, so Matthew wasn't surprised to see that he floundered around trying to catch up.

He eyed Toris and Katerina next. Katerina was trying to coax Toris on the ice. He was standing uncertainly on the edge, teetering and waving his arm. Katerina made an encouraging motion and Toris wobbled towards her. He smiled, unsure, looking somewhat like a demented toddler learning to walk while Katerina clapped and giggled. He almost made it to her when he tripped, taking them both down, and landing face first in her cleavage. Matthew watched him struggle to escape the boobpit while slipping and apologizing while Katerina tried to help him by making it worse.

It was revolting and Matthew felt less than generous about the whole thing. He tried to buck it off. He hated feeling so shitty and Scrouge-like. Normally he'd just give a wistful smile and move on, but he was being smothered here, dammit!

"Matvey?"

He jumped ten feet in the air and made a not-squeal in surprise.

"You are going to skate, da?"

"In a minute."

Alfred had somehow convinced Natalia to do a complex figure skating dance. Matthew always knew Alfred was more in touch with his feminine side. The closet was a dead giveaway. He half expected Alfred to rip off his heavy winter coat to reveal sparkly red, white, and blue spandex doing a Blades of Glory rendition complete with blinding smile and no underwear. The two synchronized amazingly, making Matthew a little more suspicious about his brother's "football" practice. Matthew was sure that Natalia would never let Alfred participate, which meant he learned all the moves just by watching. Sometimes he was so sickening.

Ivan must have followed his gaze because he rumbled in a tone Matthew couldn't identify, "Alfred and Natalia look good together."

"Want to show them up? With our hockey skills we should at least look decent." Matthew teased, letting himself fall back against Ivan. Ivan tucked his chin down on Matthew's head and sat watching silently.

Matthew decided he didn't like Ivan being so silent and still. He was usually smiling or giggling or fidgeting with his scarf or making some quip.

"C'mon, the worst that can happen is we look stupid." Matthew cajoled. He thought looking stupid was one of the suckiest things that could happen, but he wanted Ivan to perk up. Even if it meant being uncomfortable and more than likely landing on his ass on the ice.

They were just about to take the ice to do something (probably not, much to Matthew's disappointment, hot, close ice tangoing) when a voice rang out across the pond.

"Vaaaaaaaaaaaasssh!"

The gun guy, who was minding his own business (watching his sister like a hawk—Matthew wasn't sure where the shotgun went but he was probably imagining a scope on Berward's broad back), jerked his head up.

Matthew watched as a girl bounded out of the woods making a beeline towards Vash. He looked around for an escape. Matthew was surprised to see that it was Francis' niece Michelle. The logistics of such a thing slightly baffled him, something about Francis being an accident and all his siblings and cousins being older than him, but he remembered Michelle. And that could be problematic for him.

And apparently overt, unwelcome groping ran in the family because she tackled Vash into the snowbank and felt him up. Before he could react she jumped up giggling and bounded back over the snow like some magical snow dolphin to skid out on the ice in her boots and hide behind the sister.

"Michelle," Vash ground out while trying to straighten his clothes. He ripped the scarf from around his eyes and settled it back on his shoulders. "Your hands are cold."

"Were they? Sorry, I didn't even think of grabbing some gloves. Maybe I should tuck them in your pockets until they warm up and we can try again!" Michelle winked. She was definitely related to Francis. And apparently she had set her sights on poor Vash. Matthew knew what a bulldog she could be once she was interested… it had taken a lot to convince her he really was gay and not just playing hard to get.

She peered around at the gathering, suddenly realizing they had an audience, and spotted Matthew. She gave an excited greeting in French and tried to race (skid and flail) over to him. Ivan moved to intercept her, probably fearing he'd be stripped and left for naked, but Matthew patted his arm.

"Matthieu!" Michelle chirped brightly, giving him a big hug. Ivan glared. "How are you? Oh, is this your boyfriend? He's hot. Uncle Francis was just speaking of you and your new boyfriend the other day!" Ivan scowled at the mention of Francis and looked like he was ready to pick her up by the pigtail. She seemed to realize this because she sidled around the other side, "He says I should give you a French kiss for him."

Ivan did move then. He lunged forward only to find a shotgun in his face.

"No fighting on my pond." Vash warned lowly, glancing at Michelle. She meekly tucked her head and mumbled a sorry.

Ivan giggled and grabbed Matthew's arm possessively.

Did he have to do this. Every. Single. Time. They. Met. Another. GUY?

Michelle darted forward and pecked Matthew on one cheek then the other. She punched him in the arm and darted away as Ivan giggled again darkly. Vash glared at her but kept his gun trained on Ivan.

"We have so much catching up to do." Michelle smiled and gave Ivan a little wave, "I want to know all about your boyfriend. See if he measures up to my standards. I don't care what Uncle Francis says, you two look cute together."

Matthew had the feeling that the bounty on Francis just grew larger and that he wouldn't appreciate his niece's flippant remarks. He'd be lucky if he could keep his manhood at this rate.

"Were you guys skating?"

Uh, duh.

"Cool. I'll go get my skates! Then everyone will have a partner, right? Vash, be my partner!"

Matthew rolled his eyes. Now they'd never have peace. And Heaven help him if she caught him alone because she'd weasel every dirty little secret out of him that he'd known, dreamed, or thought of. Including his fake relationship and current troubles. The thought was just mortifying beyond belief. He would probably combust if she knew his secret and laughed at him.

Alfred couldn't keep the grin off his face. Natalia had long since abandoned him but he continued to skate in lazy, graceful circles. It wasn't that he didn't appreciate Matthew's love of hockey, he was always up for smashing things, but he had to admit there was something to figure skating. At first, when he had followed Natalia to her sessions, he had scoffed and laughed about how girlie it was, but when he crept on the ice after she left, he learned that it required phenomenal amounts of concentration, power, and finesse.

Trying to get Natalia's attention was quite possibly the hardest thing he'd ever done. He was used to getting his way with a charming smile and a few glib words. He knew he wasn't patient. One of his teachers had likened him to a chipmunk on crack. He had to agree with no small amount of pride. He was a genius of spur-of-the-moment plans and had enough determination to out-stubborn a mule and enough smarts to do just enough work to look good.

So when he launched (with a bit of help) such an intricate plan, he wasn't very confident. Now he was on cloud-nine and eyeballing the others skating around.

He thought he might have gotten somewhere with the kiss he attempted after walking her home from the carnival, at least before she tried to shove his nose up his skull. She was just surprised, he knew. He hoped anyway. It was kind of a stupid thing for him to do, scaring her like that, but he was used to girls wanting a good-night kiss.

His eyes lingered on Toris, who had gained a little bit of confidence. He was giving short, clipped strides to keep up with Katerina's long, smooth ones. She was proving that she wasn't nearly as klutzy as she seemed to be off-ice. He didn't know what Toris' problem was. When Matthew made an off-handed comment about the two, Alfred hooted, not remotely bothered that he hadn't spotted it first. And now he was annoyed at their slow pace. It wasn't like Katerina was going to say no.

He glanced over at his brother. He had to look a couple of times and he forgot what he was doing once or twice as he avoided the trigger-happy Vash, who was accompanying his sister. Sometimes he wondered how he and Mattie were even related, looks aside.

Mattie was so quiet and… sarcastic. Geez, and get him mad and that was it. He would hold it against you forever, even if he pretended he didn't. And he saw things in people that Alfred only felt. He used his brain when Alfred just acted. But working with Natalia made Alfred notice some things about his brother and he wasn't sure he liked them.

He momentarily dropped his smile and frowned a little. What was the hang up? He'd practically handed Ivan over on a platter. And now Matthew was moping on the sidelines while Natalia dragged Ivan around by the scarf. Literally. Alfred thought the blue shade was pretty unattractive on the big guy. It made him even paler.

He made towards his brother, dodging Tino and his geeky looking boyfriend, but was cut off by Michelle. She gave him a wide, bright smile and he had to grin back. As often as Francis got on his nerves, he was pretty fond of Michelle. Granted, they only managed to go on three dates before deciding to go separate ways.

"Hey there, buster. I see you've got a new girl." Michelle teased and gave a mock sniffle, "So quick to replace me."

"I wish she was mine." Alfred responded, glancing longingly over at Natalia and Ivan. Ivan was trying to keep his balance and keep her at arms' length, "We're just friends."

"Uh-huh. And that's the look you give a friend you want to have some benefits with."

"You're so nosy." Alfred laughed loudly, "Who are you driving crazy now?"

She sighed and stumbled on the ice. He leaned forward to catch her, not noticing Natalia's icy look, and held on until she straightened, giggling.

"Oh, you know. I'm doing the solo thing right now. There are some guys I've got my eyes on, but, you know. I'd really like to get into Gil-Gil's pants but Uncle Francis had a cow. Vash is pretty cute when he's not being a jerk." Michelle waved her hands and almost fell again. Alfred held out his hand and she gratefully took it.

Once he escorted her to the safety of the snowbank, she gave him a curtsy and whispered, "What's the deal with Mattie? He's being so mopey."

Alfred blinked. Damn, he'd forgotten Matthew again. That's what he had been doing. He was going to go pester his brother. It wasn't his fault Matthew blended into the background.

The two of them shifty stared at the subject of their covert conversation. He was sitting on a frozen bench, very un-Matthew like when there was ice to skate on, and staring off into space. A small frown was stuck on his face.

Michelle followed his blank gaze and she frowned too.

"So Uncle Francis wasn't kidding, huh?" Her dark eyes tracked Ivan across the ice. He had managed to get away from Natalia and had stolen Katerina away from Toris. The siblings gracefully crossed the ice, oblivious to their audience. "So what's the problem? They're dating and Francis said he's pretty damn good in the sack… oh my god, you don't think he beats Mattie, do you?"

Alfred scowled, wincing at the comment on his brother's sex life- he so did not want to know that, "No. Ivan's not… he wouldn't do that to Mattie. He can be a prick and he's, uh, been threatening before, but he wouldn't hurt Mattie."

"You don't sound so sure."

Alfred shook his head. It wasn't just that he didn't think Ivan wasn't capable of it… he was quite sure of the opposite. There had been a several times where he had seen Ivan's temper. There were a few times he had been on the receiving end of it when he jabbed some hidden button too hard as well. He just didn't think Matthew would put up with it for very long. Matthew wasn't as big of a pushover as everyone assumed; Alfred knew first hand.

Plus, he had seen Ivan at the party. He got the feeling that Ivan didn't take care of other people very often. No, Ivan had been treating Matthew the same way he would've Katerina. And Alfred was sure he wouldn't be graced with the same treatment if he had been as dumb as Matthew.

"Well, then what's the problem?"

Alfred shrugged. The hell if he knew. Matthew was a complete mystery to him most of the time. He was like Alfred's opposite, so who knew what went through his curly blonde head. Alfred was sure that Matthew was the problem and not Ivan. Ivan was… well, being Ivan… whatever that meant.

Michelle watched the ice for a few more minutes then grimaced, "Uh, I think your not-girlfriend is plotting my death."

"Natalia's too wrapped up with Ivan to notice."

"Then why is she glaring at us like she wants to stab me?"

Alfred looked up. Sure enough Natalia was posed several yards away, her hair whipping slightly in the chilly wind and a frown on her pretty face. He felt his heart do a little fluttery thing, the thing it only did for her, and an unconscious grin made its way across his face. He waved back and she looked away. Within moments Matthew and Ivan were out of his head.

He bounded forward, hitting the ice with a small slip. He laughed and skated up to her feeling like a ridiculous puppy.

"Heya, Nat, you look beautiful. Ice and snow really suit you." He praised, meaning every word. While Ivan looked washed out and unhappy in the snow, Natalia seemed to be in her element. The ice made her look elegant, untouchable, perfect.

He was sure he looked like an utter idiot but he didn't care.

"Has she finished with you?" Natalia asked, looking past him at Michelle, who was cornering Matthew.

Alfred choked.

"All done. She's not too good with ice skating, so I was just doing the heroic thing and helping her out." Alfred explained slowly, reminding himself Natalia had no idea what she implied, but still smiling brightly.

He was hoping she would skate with him again. He wondered if she knew how to snow ski. He and Matthew were definitely going to hit the slopes tomorrow. He hated snow and he hated cold, but he loved skiing and skating. He even went through a snowboard phase as a teenager. It'd be nice if she didn't; then he could teach her like Katerina did Toris.

Natalia's pale blue eyes relaxed a little.

"So long as you are finished." Natalia replied blandly but didn't look away like she normally would. He continued to smile and wait patiently. She relaxed a little more and added, "Perhaps you could show me other routines?"

"Of course!" Alfred whooped exuberantly, any remaining thoughts of Matthew, Ivan, or Michelle clearing his head at light speed. And he completely missed Michelle's wide grin as she pointed at them while talking to Matthew.