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WARNING: Reference to suicide/drugs/rape
CHAPTER TWELVE
Today has been good so far. School had been fine, he hadn't spied Blaine anywhere and his car hadn't been in the parking lot and he'd literally felt his anxiety drop off his shoulders like a heavy blanket. Just to be safe though he'd gone to practice with the TroubleTones at lunch, ignoring the hurt looks on both Rachel and Finn's faces. Though he couldn't bring himself to care. Finn still hasn't escaped whatever bubble he's in to notice that something is wrong, although he had gotten a weird look from him when he'd flinched away from a friendly hug. Which had been odd, Finn's not normally affectionate, especially not in public, and definitely not with him.
He's home now, helping Carol organize dinner and she's keeping up a steady stream of conversation, one he doesn't need to contribute to overly much. He's hearing all about her day, the strange customer requests, weird clothes, and moments like this he wonders whether he'd get along great with his own mom. He's always assumed he would, from what he remembers of her, but sometimes a little traitorous part of his mind points out that they were very similar and would've likely ended up arguing about which music to listen to. He ignores it.
The doorbell rings and indicates he'll answer it, Carole busy peeling potatoes. He looks through the peep hole and frowns, can't figure out why Dave would be at his house, it's not like they're friends, despite what's happened, and he's pretty sure Dave should be at training. Or some other after-school activity. He opens the door slowly, slightly hesitant. Dave is standing there, hands in pockets, looking like he'd rather be anywhere else but there, looking slightly embarrassed. And worried.
"Hey Kurt…"
"Dave. Hi. What can I do for you?"
"Look, uh… this is really, uh, awkward, but do you have Blaine's parent's cell numbers or something?"
What the hell?
"Why would you need those?"
"Uh… it's kind of…um…personal. Um. Can I come in?"
If Carole wasn't home he wouldn't have thought for a second before closing the door in his face, except she is home and he just feels that he can trust Dave to not freak him out. Hopefully. He opens the door wider and beckons Dave inside with a hand, leading him through to the lounge after informing Carole of their visitor.
"Look, uh, I don't need to stay long, I just… need a way of getting hold of Blaine's parents."
"Oh. Well I don't have their numbers. Do you mind telling me why you need to get hold of them so desperately?" He snaps.
Dave lets out a long sigh and ruffles his hair and rubs his face, and he looks tired.
"I get that he's a complete asshole, and I've never liked him… but he came to find me today."
"What? Why?"
"Because you aren't talking to him and he wanted to find out what happened on Saturday. Not that I could shed much light, except tell him how I found you… he believes he raped you."
He stiffens at that, doesn't want to get into all the details again, least of all with Dave Karofsky. It's none of his business.
"Look Kurt, I don't like the guy, but he… he clearly loves you. A lot. I mean… He's pretty cut up about the whole thing. Devastated even."
"He's devastated?"
"Fuck. I'm screwing this up. Look. He had a bottle of sleeping pills on him. I get that he's a complete ass. I really do. I just… I think you'd have made me take you to the police if something reallybad had happened, not that what happened wasn't bad. Fuck. Shit. I'm not good with words."
He doesn't know what to say, because Dave seems to be doing fine with the words, but he's gone cold at the idea of Blaine killing himself because of what he's done. Clearly he's not as cold-hearted as he'd like to think and a small part of him hates the idea of Blaine hurting. It's a very small part though. Dave's continued talking, hands still shoved into the pockets of his jeans, eyes on the toes of his shoes.
"Look, I get it. He betrayed your trust. Has hurt you and shit… but how will you feel if he beats himself up so badly over this that he does something stupid? Like, really stupid? I'm trying to do the right thing, so I drove out to his place and there was no one there, so I drove back to Lima and I didn't want to bring…him here, so I took him to my place so my step-mom can keep an eye on him and then I came here… because I'm out of ideas. So that's why I need a number."
Kurt lets out a sigh. Despite it all Dave is making sense even with all his rambling. He doesn't wish Blaine dead, and he might hate him right now, might never want to see him again, but dead? No. He's glad that he's not sitting out in Dave's truck though, that Dave didn't want to bring him here. It's a small comfort.
"Come on, his dad is a lawyer in Cincinnati. We can work from there."
He hasn't even pulled his phone out of his pocket before the doorbell rings again and Carole calls out 'I got it!' He enters in a search engine for legal firms in Cincinnati with Anderson, because he's pretty sure Blaine's dad is a partner. Or associate. Something.
"Kurt? You have another visitor…"
He turns and okay, Dave Karofsky is not the strangest person to ring his doorbell this afternoon. Blaine's mom is a petite woman, tidily dressed in designer jeans and blouse, stylish boots, but instead of her usual coiffed hair and impeccable makeup she looks… desperate. Worried. Concerned.
"Kurt, I… I know it's probably a long shot, but Blaine hasn't been by has he? He left his phone at home."
Kurt looks to Dave, who looks between him and Blaine's mom.
"Uh…Mrs um… uh… Blaine's mom… sorry, I don't know your last name."
"Oh, I'm Meredith Harper. I… have you seen Blaine?"
"Uh, yeah. I've been trying to get hold of you actually. Um… Blaine's not so good."
Kurt watches as her face drains of color and he has to bite his lip.
"He's fine. He's at my place. My step-mom is keeping an eye on him… I just didn't want to leave him alone."
"Thank you. Thank you so much…"
Kurt watches as Dave's eyes fly wide as he's hugged by the tiny woman. She looks particularly small beside him, but the fierceness of her hug obviously has some impact and he awkwardly pats her on the back. Then he's being hugged, he stiffens automatically and can hear her sob into his chest.
"I'm so sorry Kurt…so sorry."
Why was she apologizing? He's not sure how to respond. Because it's not okay. He's not okay. He can't forgive her for something she didn't do, and he's definitely not forgiving Blaine. And he's unsure of the etiquette in this situation but thanking someone for an apology that is second-hand. He just shrugs, unsure, and she steps back, wiping under her eyes daintily with a fingertip.
"I'm going to be following up the drug use. I've been talking with the school governors today…"
"Wait. What drugs?" He demands, wants to know if there's more to what happened to him on Saturday.
"Sebastian. He apparently drugged Blaine, I –"
"That's not an excuse!" Kurt snaps out, understanding dawning.
"Of course not. There's never an excuse. But it is an explanation. I hope you know he would never have deliberately hurt you. It's killing him inside that he…" her voice trails off and her eyes get teary again, and why is he the one feeling bad?
He needs to tell her the truth, needs Dave to tell her about the pills, although he's pretty sure she already knows, or at least suspects.
And today had been going so well up until now.