Abridged Alluring Secret ~Black Vow~
Hurrhurr.
I just had to. I mean. Yes.
And plus, looks like quite a few of my watchers enjoy them. Which I'm happy about. 8"D

But oh my god, I haven't been typing lately. This summer's submission count for me, compared to the other summers... Is honestly pathetic. xD;;

Warnings: The same thing. Sexual implications, slight violence, and annoyingness. XD

Disclaimers: Rui belongs to ~VocaloidfanNerara, Matei belongs to ~Sasori1234, Mari belongs to ~RecruitShiruru, Mike belongs to ~Ninten2Rootbeer, Mana belongs to ~Xx-OblivionRose-xX, and Matiku belongs to ~Matiku-Cami. Alluring Secret belongs to Hitoshizuku-P.

You know, Hitoshizuku is an awesome producer. They made Soundless Voice/Proof of Life. And apparently people's append favorite- KARAKURI BURST. Also, Yume Sakura is a nice song, but that range of genres is quite amazing, to me, at least. One of my favorite producers indeed.

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"RUI," Mike, the feared judgement angel, yelled for the little angel, who walked into the room because her wings just couldn't support her boob size.

Aw. Already? The narrator got stabbed after 1 paragraph? Dang...

"Jaaaa?~" Rui replied, a huge smile on her face. She would be flying with her pair of wings, for everyone knew she was lazy. She was wearing all white and blue; white shorts with a chain that held up by a cross, baby-blue knee high boots with white thigh high stockings, and a no-sleeved collared shirt with a blue corset.

"First... What did you do to your clothing?" Mike boomed. "IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE ALL WHITE! YOU'RE AN ANGEL, MEDANGIT."

"Medangit...? OH, I GET IT! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHH-"

"SHUT UP, STOP LAUGHING."

"Are you really God? Because it doesn't seem like it," Rui spat out and continued to laugh.

"JUST GO GET OUR ORDER OF PIZZA ON EARTH, BECAUSE YOU'RE A FATTY AND CAN'T FLY AND FIT BETTER WITH THE HUMANS."

"... God, you are mean. While I'm down there, I'll just tell everyone to surrender themselves to the Devil," Rui stomped out the cloud door.

Because you know, Heaven is in the clouds and everything there is a bunch of clouds and angels.

It's been scientifically proven.

Wait what.

SO. Rui was just lazing around, I mean, God really didn't tell her where the pizza place was. So she was walking around for days, going by instinct...

Though I kinda wonder if Rui has instincts.

At all.

"UGH OH MY GOD, WHY DIDN'T GOD GIVE ME THE ADDRESS TO THE PARLOR?" the tired angel collapsed onto her feet, tired of walking. Man how she wished he boobs weren't that big.

And a certain girl came along.

"Uh, hello! Are you lost?" she asked, holding out her hand.

"You would be, too, if you were sent out to pick up pizza at a parlor your... Master I gue-" the angel looked up to... Her "savior" in her quest for PIZZAAAAA. It was a redheaded girl with yellow eyes, but with her bright features, her clothes didn't suit her. She was wearing a black gown, with enough patterns and such to be considered a dark wedding dress.

But her eyes...

Instantly, Rui pathetically fell for her... The yellow... Bright, dazzling.

"Oh! I happen to know quite a few pizza paroles around here! Maybe it's one of those?"

"Ah, just leave it, God can go get it himself."

Meanwhile in Heaven...

"I sense... A disturbance."

"It's nothing, maybe someone will join us soon," Mari, the documenting angel replied.

BACK ON EARTHHHH

"Eh? Excuse me?" the girl asked, pretty sure she heard "God". I mean, really, Rui DID have wings...

"Wannagoout." Rui got up, staring right into those captivating yellow eyes.

"W-what?"

"Wanna go out? I thought I was pretty clear," she said, being a smart aleck again.

"... Drop that attitude."

"Fine... If I do, will you go out with meeeeeeeeeee?" she complained like a 7 year old.

"Um... Okay then."

"SWEET I PICKED UP MY FIRST EARTHLING!"

"SO YOU ARE AN ANGEL?"

"No, I'm an alien."

"Liar."

"Hush, God wanted pizza."

"... I'm not gonna ask."

"Good," the immortal smiled, grabbing the girl's hand.

"Let's go, uh...!"

"... YOU PICK ME UP WITHOUT KNOWING MY NAME?" Mana slapped her face.

Weeks passed, and the pair spent so much time with each other, and though Rui did fall for her when she first met her eyes, she soon cared for Mana deeply, but it wasn't really the same around...

"Please Mana-hime! JUST ONE KISS?"

"NO GODDANGIT RUI-BABY, I TOLD YOU, I'M ENGAGED!"

"BUT WHY DID YOU HOOK UP WITH ME?"

"BECAUSE I-"

Mana was cut off to warm lips pressing on to hers.

And a hand soon met the other's face, instead of lips.

"I SAID-"

"Why... Would you do this to me, Mana...?" her head, and her voice, low.

"Rui, I said..."

Before she could even finish her sentence, the angel was gone.

MAN, THIS COULD BE A LIFETIME MOVIE...

... Haha, LifeTime...

Really, these authors need to stop angering God, we're running low on crackheads that can write.

A week passed, and there was no sign of Rui... On Earth, or in Heaven.

("Where's my medang pizza.")

So there was only place left...

Hell.

"Please, Satan. I'll form a contract with you. I'm surrendering myself to you... All I want is one... Wish."

"... Honey, please. This isn't Kuroshitsuji."

"Shut up, I don't want revenge. I want to be made into a boy. A human boy."

"... So instead of Ciel Phantomhive, you're Pinocchio?"

"SHUT UP JEEZ JUST MAKE ME A DANG MAN ALREADY."

"JEEZ, DO YOU SPEAK TO GOD LIKE THIS?"

"AS A MATTER OF FACT, YES. YES I DO."

And with that, the petty angel sold her soul to the Devil.

"... I should call up Jesus," the Devil said once Rui... Well I guess she... HE changed his name to Matei was brought back the the surface world. He pick up his pink cell phone (it even has a Hello Kitty keychain on it!) and speed dialed Jesus.

"Hello, Matiku? HAY GURLLLL"

"Don't ever call me again."

Back to the surface world!

It was the day of the wedding, and though Matei was happy to be there, he was still kinda pissed and sad that her... His...

MAN THIS IS GETTING ANNOYING...

Mana rejected him... Her... OKAY FINE, IT. WOULD THAT WORK?

So without knowing it, his expression stayed as a sorrowful one as he watched the ceremony.

But when the two turned to each other, Mana glanced at the crowd, only to meet eyes with those...

Those same green emerald eyes.

But wasn't her Rui missing? ... Angels are one gender, right?

She just had to know if it was her. She ran from the altar, towards Matei.

The pathetic bride fell for the man with mysterious eyes.

The raven haired held out his hand, and she grabbed it, both making a commotion in the chapel, and caused the chaos to burn brighter and stronger when they escaped it together.

No, like, really.

Matei thought it was a funny idea to oil the outsides of the chapel.

... Hurr, I'm so going to Hell for this story.

... I'm sorry but we're out of writers for this story, the last one was in the chapel recording from there.

JUST KIDDING.

What the pair had was the fruit of lust they both desired.

And then they banged. Several times.

"So... H... How was it?" Mana gasped for air as they laid beside each other.

"Well, it would've been much more enjoyable if you had bigger boobs..." Matei scoffed slightly.

"SHUT UP."

And they banged again. Apparently hate sex is really fun...

"Hey..."

"Hm?"

"I still don't know your name."

"... Neither do I," Matei lied.

... Anonymous sex is also apparently very fun...

"I'm Mana."

"Matei."

Jeez, guys have been having sex for quite a few days now, and you don't even know each other's names? Matei even gave you a ring, and you don't know his name?

God, this sounds like an MTV program...

One day, Matei went out to get pizza for himself ("BEAT THAT, GOD!"), and he left a sleeping Mana by herself. When she woke up though, she just found herself admiring the ring...

I mean, mood rings are pretty cool to watch when they change colors...

And suddenly, a huge crash was heard behind her.

God was standing there, with a gun in his hand.

"MEDANGIT I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS PIZZA FAR TOO LONG. AND I'VE FINALLY FOUND RUI'S DISTRACTION FROM FRIGGING GETTING MY FRIGGING PIZZA!" he loaded his gun.

"R-Ru-!"

Mana fell to the ground, stone cold.

"Me. I hope Rui finally gets that pizza when she sees this. I mean, she even sold her soul to the Devil! He needs to stop texting my son, the bills are getting high..."

And with that, he vanished.

"Pizza delivery for a very lo-...! MANA!" Matei ran to her cold body, cradling her in his arms.

"GODDANGIT, why do I always have to die?" Matei cried.

His contract was broken... And soon made a new one.

He would trade his life for Mana to live again.

But before that, he change back to his original form... Rui.

"Mana..." the fallen angel smiled sadly, tears profusely falling from her eyes when Mana awoken from her...

I guess permanent sleep? If that makes any sense.

And with that, Rui was gone.

But that didn't sadden the redhead at all.

"I KNEW IT! MATEI WAS RUI! OR... RUI WAS MATEI! I WIN THE BET!"

But then she realized she was all alone, and how much she actually really did like hate sex.

But they will meet again...

...

"And in the end... I STILL DIDN'T GET MY MEDANGED PIZZA!"

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Oh man I'm so going to Hell for this. LOLOLOL
So what do you think of this abridged? XDD