Ooh, this is oodles fun to right! Same disclaimer as the first page, I haven't acquired either work in the time between updates.

Space, near Earth, time undefined:

Far, far out in an inky vacuum, the planet Earth grew larger in an invaders' viewport. Blue-green, swirly atmosphere, typical. If you've seen one terrestrial planet, you've seen them all.

Hearing one is different.

The invaders' antennae had never once taken part in the pleasure of such transmissions. To think that such a small, undeveloped world could produce an achievement of this magnitude, and then broadcast it into space, as if desperate for attention and an identity among several trillion siblings. Joyful tones, soft and loud at the same time, it seemed, like the paradox of photons and light waves. What instruments could produce such tones? Surely most, if not all of them, had to be non-synthetic. The Irken hoped he had time during his mission to witness the working of this piece, or one like it, live.

"Are you hearing this, MR-vin?" the Invader asked to a grubby SIR unit, which stared pointedly away from the earth, as if the planet was just some annoying distraction from its' thoughts.

"Yes, I am, Invader Tab. And I'm trying not to. It sounds so disgustingly upbeat," the unit groaned. Its' parts were worn weary, its' voice in the same condition. Every word despondent and droning Tab had learned in the months they had travelled together not to voice any sympathy to Marvin; at best the robot would sight theatrically, at worst he would launch into a pseudo-philosophical tirade that would last the better part of an Irken day.

That voyage was past Tab now. Just when he was convinced he would make a crazed break from those cramped surroundings into space, they had arrived. Old invigoration began to pulse again in the Invaders' veins. I am here, Zim- back from Dirt, back reclaim my rightful title, back to- the hell, is that AT energy?

It was.

"Slight detour Marvin," Tab exclaimed, to which the robot managed a grunt, "We will be investigating this mysterious signal. Perhaps we will even run into Zim, doing the same thing?"

Another grunt.

"In any case, let us see the common names for that area… hmm, incoming data from this "internet"… Alright, from now on, to get in practice, we will refer to each other as Kaworu and Chouji Nagisa."

"I get to be Chouji," Marvin said, "It sounds somewhat less horrible to say than the former."

Tokyo-3 Junior High, 7:23 AM:

"Greetings, foreign children. I am here due to your previous teachers' disappearance, and probable death. He will not be missed," said Bitters-Sensei, gesturing to her name on the board in Kanji. The class didn't quite know how to take this odd manner of being addressed, so they remained silent. The strange, decrepit Gaijin woman spoke fluent Japanese, but word was that she used no honorifics when addressing members of the staff. Shinji wondered what was up with the school board- first the creepy green student in his class, now their new teacher, who managed to say such disturbing things while keeping a straight, even livid, face.

"If I may, Bitters-Sensei," said Hikari Horaki, resident typical class rep, "Was that meant as a joke, or-"

"No it was not meant as a joke, little miss Simpleton, as any sane being could have told through my tone of voice," Bitters snapped, an accusatory, yellow fingernail jumping at the speed of light towards Hikari.

The class rep stammered something about protocol, doubtless her only refuge in times of crisis.

Bitters sneered, if one could sneer without the basest hint of amusement. "You weakling Asians are all the same, almost as bad as American upstarts," she whispered hoarsely, still loud enough for everyone to hear, "Be that as it may, you will all be expected to overcome base instincts and grow the spines that your ridiculous teenage 'Ah-Nee-May'"-she said it like it was a bad taste on her forked tongue-"heroes seem to have you pegged at."

Hikari mouthed several empty syllables. "And my name is Bitters, not Bittelisu. Learn english, child, I learned Japanese," the teacher finished as an afterthought. "Let's see if they'll accept a transfer of you to Gaten City, to set an example. I'll take my time filing the paperwork, so you can say goodbye to your horrible friends. You!" she pointed to Zim. "I hate you less than the others. You're our new class representative."

Zim nodded slowly, not listening. "Yes, yes," he mused, "And how prepared, would you say, is earth for…" he paused, looking like he was pretending to think, "A, uh, full scale alien invasion?"

A couple kids snorted. Bitters raised an eyebrow. Her coke-bottle glasses had yellow, opaque lenses. Combined with the expression, they really could shut a class up fast.

"And just what is the source of such frivolity?" The teacher asked. "You there," she pointed at a kid in the front row, "You tell me! You were the loudest!"

The student gulped, loud as he could, and stammered, "Well, I uh… uhhhh… its'… he just asked the same question to the last teacher, on his first day, m-ma'am."

"Did he nowww?" the Sensei purred, like a grave supervillain. "Zim, you may join me, Hikari, and Shinji in lunch detention."

"What? Why me?" Shinji squeaked, jumping a little in his seat.

"Because you remind me of Napoleon Bonaparte. He was a real pussy," Bitters answered, as if it were obvious. Shinji nodded and drooped his head. He didn't see Zim stroke his own chin- or chuckle to himself.

Same Location, 11:39 AM:

"Next, the absorbency test," Zim announced.

Shinji stared apprehensive daggers at the puddle of milk on his desk. "You want me to clean it up- OW!"

The diminutive green boy had slammed Ikari's head into the table. "Good, good," Zim said, ignoring Ms. Bitters' shouts for silence, "Your well-groomed hair soaks up the moisture most adequately." He pulled a stunned Shinji up into a sitting position. The newer kid blinked the milk out of one eye, groaning.

"THAT WIIIILLLL DOOOOO!" Zim announced, letting Shinji's head droop again, and prompting the teacher to yell "Quiet!" again from over her book. "You have proved worthy for the friendship material of ZIM. I will call you. Maybe we can dangle ourselves sometime, as all the frigid children do."

Shinji was only half-listening to the nonsense. He really didn't need any new friends right now, especially full on insane, mutant ones. He asked, tentatively, "Uh… Zim, was it?"

"HMMM?" The green boy looked down, the manic glint to end all glints in his eye.

"Well," Ikari said, avoiding eye contact, "You just see- its' really- why do you need me for a friend, anyway? I'm not even that good at being one, I don't think, and-"

"You see that girl there?" Zim interrupted, hunching over Shinji's desk, and pointing to Hikari. She was eating a sandwich calmly, still dumbstruck by her misfortune. "I have heard her describe myself as a- quote, 'friendless freak-boy,' end quote. I have decided, that in order to be perceived as a quintessential non-freak, I must have friends. Enter: You!" He gestured at Shinji, who quickly looked to the front desk, where Bitters had stopped trying to keep the room in silence.

"You're lack of will, and our mutual outsider status are perfect attributes." Zim continued as he marched around Shinji's desk, hands behind his back, "The fact that we share punishment presented the opportunity of testing, and you've passed with flying colors. Now, I will not bother you, but it should be stated, loudly if need be, at least 9 times a day that you and I are friendhumans by each of the two party members in question. Is that understood, minion?"

"Minion?" Ikari looked up.

"Yes. Now, out of my sight."

"But we're both in deten-"

"LEAVE, EARTH TROLL."

Misato Katsuragi's Apartment, 3:57 PM:

"Afternoon Shinji-kun! How was-"

"Why am I still here?"

Misato tensed. This was of course what she'd expected, but she evidently should have expected it more. Shinji looked at here, blank faced. She stared back, to him a silhouette created by the blinding light from her sparse lodgings.

"Your father thinks that it- that it's best if you stay in Tokyo-3," she answered after enough awkward to choke a cat. "Just in case you change your mind. I personally am against it," she added quickly. Shinji didn't move one muscle in his face.

Just then, the tension broke. The breaking sounded like this.

"GIR! GIR! WE DO NOT DEFICATE IN OTHER'S DWELLINGS. EVEN IF THEY ARE INFERIOR GRIME-JUNKIES!"

A greenish blur ran up the darkened stairs, and, without stopping for breath, said to Misato, "Do you have any unhealthy food-like substance? I need to placate my dog"

The muscles in Shinji's face seemed to be working just fine now. "Z-Zim- Why? I… who?"

"Well, I was in the neighborhood, walking my INSUBORDINATE CANINE," he glared down the stair flight, "When I happened upon your temporary dwelling."

"Wha- how did you know this was where I lived? How did you know it was temporary?"

Zim seemed not to have thought that far. He froze. Misato decided to butt in.

"Hello, uh, Zim was it?" she forced a smile and leaned down (short kid, for his age). She'd heard of a bizarre greenish hued child with no history files suddenly butting his way into the school system, so she didn't real away in terror. "I'm ah… Misato Katsuragi, Shinji's legal guardian for the time being. You a friend of his from school?"

Before Ikari could interject, Zim said, grinning in a soberingly sinister way "Yes, a very good friend. May I enter?"

NERV medical bay, 5:34 PM:

"OW!"

Dib sat bolt upright. Any sensory information had been cut short for what felt like four seconds. He'd had no time to express his pain as anything other than crude shrieking, and now that he was conscious again, the boy could sum it up in one simple, simple word.

Logic took over. He was disoriented- both the slimy synthetic hell-fluid that he had had to breathe and shuddering impact were gone, replaced by warm sheets and a small, dark room. Dib would normally have taken up active exploration of his surroundings, but seeing as his head felt like an ultra dense neutron star, the son of Membrane remained sedentary. Eyes proceeded to adjust, and, after what felt like another lapse into sleep, a door opened.

"Ah! I'd had a feeling you may be awake. I've come to inform you of your current condition," Dr. Akagi said. It was a miracle how Dib picked up on her stoicism in the dim light. Must have been her voice. "You must be very confused. Rest assured, all is well. You're in a med-bay, neither you nor your sister suffer any permanent injury. The angel is dead. Gaz quite astonishly dealt with it, given her level of training."

Dib grunted his aknowledgement. His lips were like lead blubber

"I don't want you to feel ashamed," said Ritsuko, her voice contradicting that statement, "But running disconnecting the umbilical cable like that was a risky, and costly move. You might have been afraid, but I can assure you that your accident was far more likely to cause fatality than dealing with the angel." Her tone instructed Dib that that was not a solid fact. He didn't have time to care though- because now the boy had been reminded of why he had run off.

"N.. n..ot…Scared," he managed.

"Oh?" said Akagi.

"Aaa..Alien," croaked Dib.

The Doctor sighed. "I can't expect to have a coherent conversation at this stage in your recovery. Just one more thing." She got up and spoke to the Pilot from his doorway: "Your father will have to work round the clock here for the next few months. You will be staying with Shinji and Misato. Your sister will be-"

But Dib blacked out at that part.