A/N: Sorry, this update is kind of short, but I wanted to get it up. There are about eight to ten more chapters left, so I hope you stick along for the rest of the story!

Chapter 32

As Meredith snuck out of the apartment at six in the morning, she realized that she had nowhere to go. In an ideal situation, she could just take a cab to JFK and hop on the next plane to Los Angeles to see Cristina. Or Seattle to see Izzie. Hell, she'd even go to Iowa to see Alex. She would go anywhere if it meant getting far away from Derek so she could think clearly. However, it is September, and she is in her final year of medical school, so Meredith cannot fly across the country just because she wants to. She has to stay in New York so that she can go to class and work. Unfortunately, her best friends don't live in New York, so Meredith isn't sure what to do.

After going through every number in her phone book, Meredith had a plan, but she wasn't too keen on it. She hailed a cab and said a silent prayer as it drove a few blocks, towards the more wealthy area of the Upper East Side. Pulling in front of a large apartment building, butterflies began to build in Meredith's stomach. She sighed deeply, paid the cab driver, and grabbed her bags. Heading to the door, a well-dressed doorman pulled it open for her, and grabbed a few of her bags. He led her inside, but rather than take her to the elevator, he took her to the front desk. Clearly, he knew she didn't live here.

The receptionist, a man in his mid-fifties with salt and pepper hair, studied her up and down before speaking, which made Meredith feel uncomfortable.

"May I help you?" the man said, his tone condescending.

"Um, yes," Meredith began. "I'm here to visit Addison Montgomery."

"Mhmm," the man responded, his voice disbelieving. "And does she know that you're coming?"

"No she doesn't. It's kind of, uh, a last minute visit," Meredith said quietly, lowering her head in embarrassment. When she looked back up, the man was looking at her with disdain, and Meredith figured it was because she didn't look or act the part of a wealthy socialite, so she had no reason being in this building so early.

"Look Miss…" the receptionist trailed off, looking at her expectantly.

"Mrs. Grey," Meredith said pointedly, though she wasn't sure if she wanted to be married anymore.

"Mrs. Grey, I'm afraid that I cannot let you see Miss Montgomery. It is very early in the morning, and I'm sure she doesn't want to be disturbed."

"Trust me, I'm an old friend," Meredith insisted. "She will want to see me. Please call her for me. Tell her that Meredith is here and it's important."

The receptionist rolled his eyes at Meredith, but apparently decided to humor her, picking up the phone at the front desk and dialing Addison's number. Meredith could hear the dial tone from the phone, and it rang four times, the man's smirk getting wider with each passing ring.

Finally, on the fifth ring, Addison's tired voice came through the line. The man became the epitome of excellence, apologizing for being forced to wake Addison so early.

"Hello Ms. Montgomery, I'm so sorry for waking you…You have a visitor here to see you, I tried to tell you that you were probably asleep, but she wouldn't…I believe her name is Meredith…Yes, of course Miss Montgomery, have a nice day." He hung up and looked to Meredith.

"Miss Montgomery will be in her apartment waiting for you. Enjoy your visit Mrs. Grey."

Meredith rolled her eyes at the front desk man before she followed the door man to the elevator. The car travelled up the five floors quickly, and she followed the door man when he took a right out of the elevator and walked to the very end of the hallway, where Addison's apartment was.

Addison was already stepping out into the hallway when she arrived, her face filled with exhaustion and confusion.

"Meredith?" Addison said, stifling a yawn. Her expression became even more confused when she saw the door man was carrying two of Meredith's bags, and Meredith was holding one, and her backpack as well. "What's going on?"

"I'm sorry," Meredith began, tears beginning to fall. "I don't know where else to go, and I know you have an extra bedroom, so can I stay here for a little while?"

Addison's face creased into concern and worry as she watched the young girl fall apart in front of her. "Yes, of course, come on in." She signaled to the doorman, who followed suit.

Addison's apartment was quite large for one person, but her father wanted to ensure that she had the best. The living room and kitchen were large and white; Addison's father hired a maid to clean her apartment every other day. Her apartment also had two large bedrooms, as well as a smaller office. Meredith had only been there a handful of times, but it was very impressive.

"Just put her things in the room at the far end of the hall," Addison said, pulling a twenty dollar bill out of her purse and handing it to him. When the doorman left ten minutes later, Addison looked at Meredith expectantly.

"What's going on, where's Derek?" Addison said, obviously concerned about Meredith.

Meredith let out an involuntary sob. "He kissed a scrub nurse. Or a scrub nurse kissed him. Do you know Rose? Because that's who he kissed. And it hurt so much when I found out. And I'm so freaking tired, but I couldn't sleep because I was sad and Derek was in the next room, so I had to leave."

"What? Derek kissed Rose? And you just left?" Addison was in shock, trying to process everything.

"Yes. Please Addison, I'm exhausted. I really want to sleep, and I promise I'll tell you everything in a few hours, okay?"

Addison opened her mouth to say something, but thought better of it. "Yes, of course. You know where the spare bedroom is."

Meredith gave Addison a small smile. "Thank you," she reached for Addison's hand, squeezing it gently before turning and walking down the hall.

When she reached the bedroom, she immediately stripped out of her clothes and threw on sweatpants and a tee shirt. Then, she crawled into bed, the very large, very empty, king size bed. The enormity of the bed emphasized the fact that Derek wasn't there beside her; that she had packed her bags and left him, needing to get away as fast as possible. The tears started flowing once again as she cried softly, but eventually, she slept.

XXXXXX

Meredith didn't know how long she slept for, but when she woke, she felt slightly more rested than she had before. Pulling on a sweatshirt, she stumbled into the living room, where Addison was reading a book, dressed impeccably as usual. She looked up as Meredith came in, offering her a sad smile.

"Hey," she said, giving Meredith a sad smile. "Do you want something to eat?"

"Sure," Meredith shrugged, following Addison into the kitchen. After pouring cereal and sitting down at the table, Meredith looked up to find Addison staring back at her.

"So, what happened?" Addison asked expectantly. "You said he kissed Rose."

Meredith nodded, determined to be resolute, and not cry. "On Monday, but I didn't find out until yesterday. And it wasn't even Derek that told me. It was Mark, he had overheard them talking about it in the hallway."

Addison moved to hug Meredith. "I'm so sorry, that was such an asshole move. What are you going to do?"

"I-I-I don't know. There are other things I need to consider now…" her voice trailed off, unsure as to whether or not she wanted to tell Addison.

"What other things? I mean, you still love him right? You guys should be able to work through this. You should take space, a lot of space and time, but you can figure it out."

"I may not have a whole lot of time," Meredith muttered.

"What? Why not? I mean, you have to apply for internships, but it'll be okay," Addison continued.

"No, it's not that," Meredith started before inhaling deeply. "I'm pregnant."

Addison stared at her for a minute expressionless before her eyes widened. "You're what?"

"Pregnant," Meredith groaned. "But I can't be more than five weeks. That's the only reason I found out about Rose, I had taken a test and needed to go to the hospital and freak out with Derek, but I saw Mark first."

"Wait, were you guys trying to get pregnant? I didn't know that you wanted kids now."

"We didn't, we weren't!" Meredith insisted. "But with how crazy my schedule is with my classes and clinicals and work, I guess I didn't take my birth control at the same time every day. Which is apparently essential to preventing pregnancy, especially when you and your husband decide to have sex whenever you can because you're so busy, which isn't always at the same time every day." Meredith ended her statement with a grown, and looked to Addison for advice.

"Well, what are you going to do? Are you going to keep it?"

Meredith groaned again. "I don't know. When I first saw the test, I was freaking out; I didn't want to get pregnant right now. But then I started thinking about it. I mean, I can't be more than five weeks, so by the time the baby is born it will be May, and I'll be graduating Med School, which means that the baby will be about two months when I start my internship, so it would be old enough to go to daycare. Plus, I thought I would have had Derek, because I know how much he wants to be a Dad, so I was sure that he would have moved some of his shifts around to be there for the baby."

"You said you thought that you would have Derek. Do you not know anymore?"

"I don't know what I want! I love him, but he has basically broken my heart and destroyed my trust in him, which I'm not sure I can come back from. And I am freaking out, but I thought I wanted this baby. With Derek, with Derek I could have this baby. I don't know if I can do it if we aren't together, but I don't know how to handle this."

"So, what are you going to do?" Addison asked.

"I'm just going to wait and see. I could have the baby and not be with Derek, but I have to define our relationship first. I don't want the baby to have all kinds of issues because Mommy and Daddy are together sometimes and then sometimes they hate each other. We need to work on our relationship."

Addison had to repress a smile when she heard Meredith refer to herself as Mommy. "I know you do, but you can't take too long. Thirty five weeks is not as far away as you think it is, trust me I'm an OB."

Meredith let out a small laugh. "Thanks for listening Addison, I really appreciate it. But I think I'm going to call Cristina now, okay?"

Addison nodded, understanding Meredith's desire to talk to her best friend. "Sure, go ahead. And Mer, you are welcome to stay here for as long as you need."

"Thanks Addison," Meredith smiled, flipping open her phone and walking to Addison's spare bedroom.