Title: Moped Romance
Pairing: Axel/Roxas, background Riku/Sora
Warnings: Boys speaking Italian, language, references other things relating to sex, drama.
Rating: R.
Beta: the BetaMistress alovelysilence
A/N: Inspired by experiences had by a good friend of mine while we were studying abroad in Rome, Italy, in the spring of 2009.
Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts, but I do get a kick out of writing for the fandom. I also do not own any of the songs mentioned; they belong to their respective artists and labels. In this chapter, Sugarcult. There was an alternative song here for a while, please youtube it and give it a listen: "Con Te Partiro" by Andrea Bocelli.
Summary: Lost on the back alleys of Rome one night, Axel finds a savior in a young blond on a moped. A love story with subtitles.
In this chapter: Four days.
Track 12 – The Investigation
Watching it burn to your fingertips
Everything stings a bit
Dangerous silence surrounds you
All of the ashtrays and magazines
Recurrent love themes
Captured by time zones that hurt you
If I could be a part of your world
Leave this all behind
I would investigate a perfect life with you
If I could say it in another way
If words could make this right
I would investigate a perfect love with you
Time is a bitch.
To a freshman arriving at college the next four years are an eternity; the potential of those years is almost inconceivable – anyone can plan out their college career, can prophesize where they will be on graduation day and where they are going. Sometimes they're pulled in another direction, and most of the time their plans don't go exactly as they foresaw. Ideas change, people change. But inevitably a day comes when the infinite amount of time in four years to accomplish this or that disappears and becomes not enough – usually when you need it the most. The last semester, the final hours before a paper is due there is simply never enough time, it just seems to speed up.
Axel was acutely aware of time's bitchiness; he'd been cursing it for a few days now.
His time was almost out.
There was still one last language exam to take care of, but then? Mere days until he'd be ushered onto a plane, his Roman life zipped into suitcases and stuffed into his backpack, watching the city disappear out his window. Four months of living in Rome had come down to only around a hundred hours, and every passing moment felt more fleeting than the next – especially the time he spent with Roxas.
Roxas himself was trying very hard not to count down the hours. Sometimes Axel could see it in his eyes, the days reduced to hours, minutes and seconds, penetrating stare memorizing the lines on Axel's face, the hard swallow in his throat that made Axel think 'dread.' It made him wonder if they'd made the right choice staying together like this until the end.
Then again, the alternative made the redhead's heart clench something painful. They'd be ok, he told himself. For now, they could be happy.
The weekend had gone far, far too quickly – but that was time again, fucking with them. Time made Axel more adventurous, made him more willing (than usual, anyway) to give into Roxas' whims and fantasies, as seen by the new video file on his computer that would probably never see the light of day again – Axel just hoped his computer never got hacked. Roxas spent a bit of time helping him review his more traditional vocabulary and grammar, as well as the more colloquial language Axel had learned. The blond, after a . . . thorough revision, deemed his sexual vocabulary in good shape, as well as his normal set.
When Axel finished his language exam late Monday morning, he stayed behind and chatted with his Italian instructor for a few minutes as the man commended him on his progress with the language. Axel eventually revealed that his secret weapon was in fact an Italian boyfriend.
Then congratulate him as well, the man said proudly. You're a spectacular student.
Axel nodded and thanked him, then headed out to meet a waiting Roxas. Once Axel was out of the doors Roxas pulled up in front of him on the moped.
The weather was gorgeous, and Roxas decided their destination was the Borghese Park. They stopped at one of the local markets, picking up some ciabatta bread, a package of freshly shaved prosciutto, a block of fresh mozzarella and a handful of greens. While Roxas was engrossed in picking out ingredients, Axel nipped into a little store and grabbed a bottle of wine and, to his excitement, a box of Baci chocolates he and Roxas enjoyed a great deal.
They found a shady spot beneath a tree deeper in the park and sat down to make their sandwiches. Without wine glasses they simply handed the bottle back and forth, taking sips of the sweet white concoction Axel picked out.
How did your exam go? Roxas asked.
Axel put the wine bottle down. It went really well. My professor wanted me to tell you thanks for being such a good teacher.
Roxas smiled to himself, unwrapping one of the chocolates carefully. The silver and blue foil gave way to reveal the mound of chocolate and hazelnut deliciousness. Roxas popped the chocolate into his mouth and pulled the wax paper quote – Axel thought of them as high-class fortune cookies – from the foil.
He looked at it for a few seconds, staring silently, before stuffing it into his pocket wordlessly. In the process he jostled the necklace and charms out from beneath his shirt. Axel was overcome by a bit of curiosity.
Will you tell me about your necklace? Axel asked quietly, fingering the delicate chain and lifting the dangling charms a little higher. What do they mean?
Roxas paused, spreading out his palm so the charms were splayed out. It was a gift from my parents, he started, the tip of his finger gliding along the thin braided silver to the cross. From when I had my first communion. My mother added the coral-
Isn't that a chili pepper? Axel interjected, eyeing the squiggly gold charm.
No, Roxas chuckled, they used to make them in Florence with pieces of coral. Then they started making these.
And the ring?
Roxas didn't answer for a moment, his finger playing over the bright blue stone. Axel realized the ring was too small to be his. It was my mother's, he finally answered. Before I left . . . I took it from her dresser. So I would have her with me.
You miss her, don't you.
Course I do. Something like ninety percent of Italian men live within a few blocks of their mothers, didn't you know that? Roxas laughed, the sound incredibly pleasing to Axel's ears. I'm more than a few miles away from mine.
Maybe you can go visit, now that you and Sora are ok, Axel suggested.
I'll write to her first, Roxas hedged. I made her life difficult too when I started talking. She might not want to deal with me, he added with a shrug.
Sora might be able to talk some sense into her.
Roxas shrugged again. I'll try not to get my hopes up. This is all I have left of her – it's precious to me.
Well, it's good you have it. When something is precious you shouldn't let it go.
Axel realized hemight've said something wrong when Roxas looked at him sharply, his mouth set in a thin, firm line. What if I have to?
The redhead froze. He was precious? Then I think we're both out of luck, Axel said thickly. Just like that, the happy and contented mood shuddered and keeled over, stone dead. Axel paused, then looked down. Have you considered somehow being able to keep in touch with-
Roxas shook his head, cutting him off. Do we really want to watch each other move on? he asked, chuckling bitterly.
It would still be nice to talk with you once in a while.
It's late, Roxas stated simply. Maybe we should head back.
Sure, Axel agreed, somewhat reluctant given the dropped subject. We can probably finish up Supernatural if you'd like.
Only if you don't spoil anything else for me, Roxas joked, helping Axel to his feet.
Dinner was only slightly somber; Roxas didn't seem to be in such a talkative mood as he usually was. It was only later, after dinner but before they'd decided to start watching the last few episodes that Roxas finally broached the subject of their remaining days together with him.
How do the next few days go? Roxas asked quietly, tilting his head on Axel's chest.
Axel took a few moments to think, trailing his fingers idly across the blond's shoulder and arm. I have to pack. Do last-minute gift shopping, and make sure everything is good at the school. Wednesday we have a class dinner, then we meet at Termini Thursday afternoon. He paused, frowning in thought. What are you thinking?
Roxas shrugged. Nothing, he said, too quickly to be telling the truth.
Tell me?
What is . . . an American date like?
Axel shifted onto his elbow to get a better look at the younger boy lodged at his side. Why an American date? he asked with a little chuckle.
Because I took you on a Roman one! Roxas protested. So what's an American one like?
Well it's not always dinner at a gay bar with all of your friends, Axel said with a grin, rolling them over so Roxas was on his back while Axel leaned over him. There isn't really a universal 'American' date – a lot of people do the 'dinner and a movie' thing.
Doesn't sound very hard.
Axel shook his head. Not really. Most of the time people will go out to dinner, eat, get to know each other-
Just each other? Roxas clarified.
Yup. No friends.
I knew… I knew they were usually smaller. So then they go to a movie?
Axel nodded. And if they really like each other, maybe they'll make out for most of the movie.
Roxas set his jaw and poked Axel solidly in the chest. Take me on an American date! he commanded.
You just want to make out in the back of the theater, Axel said knowingly, his eyes wrinkling with mirth.
Roxas looked affronted, but Axel could tell he was trying to keep himself from laughing outright. Of course not! he protested, the corners of his lips quirking up. It's called cultural exchange!
Axel fell into chuckles, resting his head against the blond's shoulder. Ok then – tomorrow, Axel promised. Tomorrow was Tuesday.
0o0
Tuesday morning Axel woke very slowly, surprised to find Roxas lightly tracing the tip of his finger over Axel's bottom lip and over his jawline. Roxas was smiling fondly. You were drooling on my pillow, he whispered, leaning in for a quick kiss.
Tuesday night, Axel and Roxas went on a date.
Truth be told, it wasn't that bad – Axel was used to things blowing up in his face, and he really couldn't complain about how the night progressed. After spending most of the day lounging, finishing up Supernatural, and sitting out on itty bitty apartment terrace nursing drinks they got dressed and headed out on Roxas' moped in search of a good trattoria to eat at close to a theater. Eventually they found one, and after sharing a bottle of the house wine as well as several delicious courses they fought over the bill, much to their server's amusement.
Once they settled that there was the movie. Axel didn't remember the name, but it was something artsy, with the typical bittersweet open-ended 'finito' that some Italian directors seemed to favor. Or at least that's what Axel figured it was, since there was still a considerable amount of wine in his system and Roxas – as usual – made it very difficult to concentrate. There were, fortunately for him, a larger number of people in the theater than they'd anticipated, so Roxas' plans for the movie were put back a small step.
But only a very small step, judging by the fact that three-quarters of the way through the movie Roxas was in Axel's lap, his tongue making itself very familiar with Axel's.
When the movie was over, Axel was quite pleased. It was pretty obvious what they'd been up to given the state of their slightly rumpled clothing and reddened lips. Roxas' hand was solid in his, squeezing and reminding him of the present.
Come, Roxas said enthusiastically. I want to show you something.
It was late now, somewhere in the vicinity of two or three in the morning. The cool night air whipped around them as Roxas drove, the fabric of their jackets and pants fluttering in its current. Axel had lost track of where they were, but he could have sworn they'd just veered off of Corso Vittorio.
When Roxas eventually slowed down and came to a stop, Axel looked around, completely puzzled. It was a narrow cobblestoned street, quiet and dimly lit; it looked like any of the other back alleys in Rome at night to Axel. What's going on, Roxas?
You don't remember this? Roxas asked as Axel climbed off and they both removed their helmets. Roxas shook his hair out to get rid of the rampant hat head he was dealing with.
Axel shook his head. No clue.
Roxas dismounted the bike, leaving his helmet on the seat, and put his hands in his pockets. This is where we first met.
"It is?" Axel blurted. I couldn't have remembered it if I'd tried.
Roxas hummed at that. And the second time, too.
Are you serious?
Of course I am, why would I make that up? Roxas responded, a little waspishly.
Ok, ok.
This is where we began, Roxas said quickly. Sort of, anyway. I wanted to come back here before . . . the end.
Axel felt like Roxas had punched him in the gut, hard. Is this, he swallowed thickly, is this the last time I'm going to see you?
What? What, no! We still have all day tomorrow, idiot, Roxas muttered fondly. Just to bring it full circle here.
Axel nodded slightly in understanding, feeling the weight lift a little. Then immediately he began to worry; the sheer possibility of not seeing Roxas after tonight had nearly shocked him to his core. How would he deal with it when they had to say goodbye, really?
Wait.
Why were you here that night? Axel asked curiously. It was really really late, and this place is nowhere near your apartment. Did you just happen to pass by going home from a club?
Roxas blanched, looking away quickly and scratching the back of his head. No, he chuckled, a little bitterly. No, I was . . . my ex lives around here, he said with a sigh.
Your ex? Axel repeated, wondering what story there was to this.
He wasn't my ex at that point, Roxas corrected. I'd gone to visit him earlier. We got into an argument – totally normal for us – and I decided to just go back to my apartment. I was driving down this street when I saw you huddled on the side of the street. You were gorgeous, and I was feeling petty and thought you'd want some fun after I got you back to your apartment, Roxas admitted with a shrug. Then when we got there, you just looked at me with this, this expression – he shook his head, unable to find the right word to describe it. No one had ever looked at me like that, even Leon.
Your ex-boyfriend, Axel clarified.
Roxas nodded. Well, you know how that ended. You puked, I punched, should have been the end of it. I started bothering Leon about it, you know, 'why don't you ever look at me like that, all you're interested in is my mouth and my ass,' he muttered bitterly. We broke up. Then I met you again, and I guess I figured 'why not.' When you didn't call back, Roxas said slowly, obviously trying to keep his tone even, I thought maybe you were just like him.
When we met for the second time, you were here too.
I was thinking about getting back together with him, Roxas admitted reluctantly. He'd called, trying to get me back. We argued again, and there you were again. It was really fucking weird.
Axel paused for a minute, taking it all in. Leon's the guy you were with two weeks ago. At Cube.
Roxas didn't say anything, which was all the answer he needed. Not that he was jealous, not at all. Thank you for bringing me back here, Axel said, wrapping his long arms around Roxas' shoulders and pulling him in despite the stiffness in the blond's stance.
I'm not coming back, Roxas muttered fervently. He swallowed dryly as Axel looked down at him curiously. I always went back to him, but not anymore.
It's ok you know, Roxas. If he makes you happy-
He doesn't, Roxas growled, cutting Axel off forcefully and pressing his face into Axel's chest. He made me feel better, like I was wanted. But, his voice almost imperceptible, you make me feel more.
Axel buried his nose into the hair at the top of Roxas' head, massaging his hands over the blond's spine in a calming motion, willing their combined emotions away for the time being.
0o0
When Axel woke the next morning to Roxas grinding his morning erection against his thigh, Axel merely grinned and quickly began to enact his favorite mode of waking Roxas up; he didn't even have to think about it. He guided the blond onto his back and shimmied down his smooth, taut body, tugging Roxas' boxers down his legs along the way. For a few moments he watched the way Roxas arched into the cooler air, the muscles in his abdomen tensing, cock bobbing against the coarse blond hair just above it.
Axel shifted the blond's legs farther apart and knelt between them, wrapping his long fingers around the base of Roxas' cock and delivering a long lick to the weeping head. Roxas moaned, arching into his touch and tongue with a choked gasp. Axel looked up through the strands of red hair hanging in his face, taking in the blond's slackened jaw and watching as his lips moved around half-formed phrases. His hands found Axel's hair and gripped, thrusting up slightly into the redhead's mouth.
Axel wasn't in that much of a rush though, taking his time licking the shaft and sucking, thoroughly enjoying the sounds Roxas was making above him. Just to feel the blond's reaction he moaned around his cock, relishing the quake of muscles beneath Roxas' skin.
Only when Roxas lifted his head and muttered his name in a curious tone did Axel take him all the way to the root, feeling the head of his dick slide all the way to the back of his throat. He heard Roxas groan, felt his orgasm begin between his lips and pulled back, stroking the blond through his climax. When Roxas flopped back against the pillow, the tension in his body drained and panting, Axel gave the head of his cock one last lick before sitting up on his knees and stretching. Good morning, Axel said, licking his lips.
Morning, Roxas responded. But when he looked back down again, Roxas was watching him with sad eyes.
Then Axel realized what day it was, and felt the air sucked clean from his lungs.
Wednesday had dawned, deceptively like any other day which it most certainly wasn't. Tomorrow Axel would be on a plane. Tomorrow he'd be watching the Italian coastline disappear from view.
Roxas too had stilled, his fingers still curled around the back of Axel's neck, as he had also realized the significance of the morning. Then he pulled Axel in for a quick kiss, tasting himself on the redhead's tongue before pulling away. Let's go shower, he murmured, pulling Axel up with him.
Like any other day.
It was almost painfully ordinary, painful enough to make Axel feel sick. The idea of one day, twenty four measly hours, made his stomach churn and his heart clench – made him freeze when he felt Roxas' soapy hands on him, reminding him of what he'd soon be missing.
Roxas, ever perceptive, withdrew his hands reluctantly. What's wrong?
Don't give me that, you know what day it is, Axel said testily, scrubbing the shampoo from his hair vigorously.
It's the same for both of us, Roxas reminded him, voice taking on an icy edge. We talked about this day, so don't treat me like that.
Then stop pretending it's like every other day, Axel threw back snarkily. Not when I can't touch or see you after today.
This isn't about just you! Roxas finally shouted, turning on him with a horrified expression. We, Axel, we. This is our last day and . . . I didn't want to make a big deal out of it. We decided this was how we were going to end, and if we can't handle it, he cut himself off, breathing deeply as he shut the water off. For a few moments there was only the sound of draining water between them. I'm sorry.
That was me, Axel murmured regretfully, his forehead dropping on the blond's wet shoulder. I'm sorry, that was me being stupid. I'm feeling stressed by everything. I shouldn't have said that.
It's ok, Roxas said quietly, petting his hair comfortingly. Just remember you're not the only one in this, right?
Axel nodded. Love you.
Love you too, Roxas whispered, kissing the shell of his ear. Now get out, I'm getting cold.
Axel chuckled and let him go, stepping out of the shower to grab two towels. He tossed one to Roxas, who toweled his hair dry before wrapping it around his waist and getting to work on his morning routine.
I have to go finish up my packing at my apartment, Axel said as he toweled himself dry.
Alright, I'll go with you, Roxas offered, styling his hair with gel. He paused and looked over his shoulder at Axel, offering a small smile. Help you bring your stuff over.
Thanks.
Back in Roxas' room, Axel was putting everything, everything that belonged to him in his backpack. He paused when his hand closed on the DVD case; they'd finished the third season of Supernatural the night before, much to Roxas' displeasure. He'd weathered the last episode rather well, considering Dean's inevitable end and Sam's inability to save him.
As he looked around the room for any of his other belongings that he might have missed, he came across a photo frame he hadn't noticed before. It was nestled on a rather messy bookshelf along with several other frames containing pictures of Roxas with his friends, some he knew and others he didn't. But this one was of him and Roxas, both smiling happily as Axel carried him piggyback near their favorite picnic spot in the Borghese gardens. Axel could remember that day with startling clarity: the sun shining in the clear blue sky, the grass beneath his bare feet and between his toes as he carried Roxas, Hayner and Olette climbing the giant tree providing them with so much shade; Naminé sitting between the roots, sketchpad and pencils out and working away diligently, and Pence, camera poised, calling out their names and snapping the photo.
Axel hadn't even thought about it – it certainly wasn't a big deal, he had plenty of pictures of himself and Roxas to call his own. But this was something of Roxas', something the blond would look at and remember – unless the memory became too painful and the photo was hidden away. Here they were together, inseparable, frozen in time just as two people ridiculously in love with each other. All too quickly, they would simply become a memory.
When Roxas came back into the room, looking fresh and ready for a day riding around the city, Axel was still looking at the framed picture Roxas had of them, his thumb brushing over the blond's face absently as he stood transfixed.
"Axel," Roxas prompted sharply, causing him to jump and look up at the blond. "What are you doing?"
"Just," Axel started, mind coming up blank. Wondering what I'm going to do, he answered lamely, wondering if he sounded more pathetic with or without the unspoken 'without you.'
"You are going to live!" Roxas said forcefully, the emotion behind the words drawing his accent out more. "This is not the end."
It's the end of us, Axel argued half-heartedly.
Roxas shook his head, closing the distance between them. This is not us, he said, covering the picture with his hand. Then he put his hand on Axel's chest, right over where Axel's heart was thudding painfully. This is.
I don't know if I can do this, Axel whispered desperately.
Look, Roxas said, sighing through his nose before he started to speak much faster. Ok, here's the thing. We're not some psychotic Romeo and Juliet couple, right? I didn't fall in love with someone who'd going to kill himself or never let himself love again because we won't be together anymore, right?
No, I'm pretty sure you made your distaste for Romeo pretty clear, Axel muttered.
Good. Because love is about life – if you can't live without someone you've become a parasite, and if you stopped being who you are because you didn't want to live without me… I'd be heartbroken, Axel. So this is what I want, he said thickly, putting the photograph aside before grabbing Axel's hands and squeezing them. I want you to go home, and be happy. That's what I want for you, because that's what you deserve.
Hey, Axel interrupted, pulling Roxas in closer; Roxas dropped one of Axel's hands as it moved to cup his cheek. That's what I want for you too. You are worth so much more than I could ever give you.
Oh, shut up, Roxas said, his voice even thicker still.
Hey now, I'm serious. I love you, but I don't want to be the reason you never look at another guy again.
Don't flatter yourself, Roxas chuckled, draining all possible poison from the remark. What is the phrase? If you love something…
You let it go, Axel finished, his heart thudding horribly in his throat. This hurt, but he was beginning to feel the pain lessen somewhat, if that was possible. You alright? he asked, placing a chaste kiss on Roxas' forehead.
Roxas nodded. I think I'll be ok. Though, after that cliché, I may never look at you the same again.
You started it, Axel shrugged, wondering if he could sort out the emotions of leaving before Roxas hit him.
0o0
When they got to Axel's apartment, it was empty. Suitcases were haphazardly piled all around, with bags containing keepsakes and gifts taped together in hopes of passing them as another carry-on bag.
The first thing Axel packed was everything from the bathroom; he left it accessible for the morning, but he wanted to make sure he had it. Then came his clothes, dirty and clean, all shoved indiscriminately into his suitcase for washing . . . later.
Roxas was sitting at the foot of his bed, absentmindedly eating Xigbar's cheez-its.
I'm not coming, you know, Roxas said suddenly, resolutely. To the airport.
Didn't think you would, Axel responded, continuing to fold up his remaining clothing.
I don't want this to be some long, tragic 'goodbye,' he continued, as if trying to justify some act of heartlessness. We're better than that.
Axel looked up from his packing, glaring steadily at the blond, who was looking at him nervously and twisting his hands together anxiously. He abandoned his folding and grabbed Roxas' forearm, pulling him in and kissing him soundly. Roxas made a small sound around his tongue before giving in and wrapping his arms around Axel's neck; for his part Axel tried to memorize the taste of his mouth, cigarettes and the salty candy he liked and the citrusy fruit he picked out from the stands.
Roxas smacked his arm and pulled away. Don't miss me.
Axel's hand lingered on his arm for a moment until he finally had to let go. You know I will, he chuckled to himself.
Sap, Roxas muttered fondly.
Axel put the last few articles of clothing into his suitcase, and with some difficulty (read: he asked Roxas to sit on it so he could actually pull the zipper) managed to get it closed. Then he stepped back and felt the ground beneath his feet disappear. All of his belongings save the clothes he wore now and a few other smaller items, were packed up in his suitcase and backpack. His room was bare and horrendously clean, save for Xigbar's waiting bags. There was nothing left in this room that was his, and within twenty-four hours all that was would be in the belly of a plane, bound for JFK airport in New York City. The entire apartment felt empty, a complete shell without the rambunctious antics of its soon-to-be former tenants; all traces of them had been wiped clean. Demyx was right, Axel thought as a cold stone settled in his stomach. Their time was ephemeral, and when it was over anything that remained of them was swept away in preparation for the next wave of students studying abroad.
Axel tried to swallow, but his mouth was completely dry. He sat down on his bed heavily, rubbing his temples and trying to calm himself down.
Roxas was there almost instantly, muttering endearments and curses as he guided Axel's head out of his hands, his fingers gentle as they tilted his chin up. Axel felt a deep ache in his chest throb and threaten to explode; the blond was smiling sadly, tracing his thumbs over the tattoos on Axel's cheeks. Then he stepped between Axel's knees and let the redhead wrap his arms around him; Axel buried his face into Roxas' chest, and immediately felt the blond's fingers comb into the hair at the back of his head and rest against his shoulder, holding him there.
They stayed like that for what felt like an eternity, one holding the other more tightly as time itself became nonsensical. Axel figured he could have stayed like this just fine, there were hundreds of thousands of worse options than being held together by Roxas' arms.
Then with a kiss to the top of his head, Roxas gently tilted Axel's head back to look at him again. Your dinner is soon, he muttered. I can take you over there, if you'd like.
I don't think I'm in the mood to sit and talk about how excited I am to go home, Axel said with a shrug. Mostly because it would be a lie.
What if, Roxas bit his lip in thought, what if we make dinner, and we can talk about how amazing it was to be here? I can bring you back here later, he offered. You can even invite Demyx and a few others, if you'd like.
Axel smiled and felt his chest ache again. I'd like that.
Roxas pulled him to his feet as soon as he spoke. Send them a message, we have shopping to do. Then he gave Axel the mad grin he'd come to associate with 'adventure time' and his boyfriend.
The two immediately set off on the blond's moped, leaving the empty apartment behind them. Axel sent off messages to Demyx and Zexion to gauge their interest as they arrived in a large outdoor market bustling with activity. Roxas pulled a giant shopping bag out of the compartment under Axel's seat, and dove right in.
Within a short period of time they were lugging around about two pounds of potatoes (I make my gnocchi from scratch!), a bunch of colorful vegetables, several loaves of savory-smelling bread, blocks of cheeses, and after a trip to the butcher shop on the outskirts of the market, prosciutto and some pancetta. At this point Demyx got back to him, saying he and Zexion were interested and asking what they should bring. After a few seconds of thought Roxas responded with Wine.
Axel relayed the message, as well as where they could find Roxas' apartment. Didn't think they'd want to miss the class dinner, Axel commented.
Well I'm glad they did, Roxas said briskly, setting the shopping bag in the footwell of his moped. Last suppers should be spent among friends.
How exactly are we going to make all that food before dinner?
Roxas sent a devious grin his way as they put their helmets on that clearly said to him 'you're my willing slave, aren't you?'
Not his only one though, since all three of Roxas' flatmates came out to help him prepare the meal along with Axel. Very soon the intoxicating aroma of fresh spices and herbs filled the apartment, along with the sounds of vegetables being cut up and rowdy conversation.
Axel became Roxas' right hand man in gnocchi-making, mixing whatever ingredients Roxas told him to in a giant container before being assigned to start forming the little dumplings.
No, like this, Roxas said quietly, reaching over and guiding Axel's hands to demonstrate how to roll them.
Axel chuckled, following his example. Think we're going to have enough?
Roxas glanced at him sharply. Of course!
The redhead grinned and stole a quick kiss.
Get a room! Hayner shouted from his tomato-chopping station.
Roxas turned and glared at him; Axel called out, I'd be careful, Hayner – he's armed. Roxas brandished his giant wooden spoon intimidatingly.
Eventually all of the gnocchi went into a boiling pot, and the tomatoes were stewed into a sauce along with the pancetta. Asparagus was wrapped in prosciutto and drizzled in oil and stuffed in the oven. Artichokes sizzled on the stovetop, leaving no cooking spot available. Once the asparagus was done Pence's veal dish quickly replaced it. But something was clearly missing.
Where's the wine? Olette shouted as the actual preparations died down.
Axel checked the time on his phone. They should be here soon. Then the little phone started ringing, Demyx's name popping up over the little telephone icon. "Speak of the devil. Demyx!" he greeted his friend.
"I think we're here, can you let us in?"
"Is the wine here?" Olette asked quickly. At Axel's nod, she announced "I've got it!" Then she disappeared out the door.
A few minutes later she reappeared with Demyx and Zexion in tow – as well as what looked like four bottles of wine. Olette looked ecstatic.
Est! Est! Est! she cried, coveting one of the bottles.
"You guys sure you want to skip out on the dinner?" Axel asked as they handed over the other bottles.
"Are you kidding?" Demyx demanded. "This looks like so much more fun, man," he said, patting Axel on the shoulder.
"Who is the head chef?" Zexion asked, sniffing the fragrant air. "I might have to kidnap this person."
Axel wrapped his arm around an unsuspecting Roxas' waist, a highly satisfied and proud smirk on his face. Roxas started, turning and looking up at the redhead perplexedly. Then he saw Axel's friends. Mister head chef, Axel murmured, tipping an imaginary top hat at him.
Zexion, looking deadly serious, got down on one knee. Come home with me, please, he whispered fervently.
I'm flattered, Roxas said. You can go on the waiting list.
Axel paused. Then he and Demyx spoke simultaneously, in two different languages with two different inflections; Demyx in awestruck English, Axel in a mockingly accusatory Italian tone: "There's a waiting list?"
Dinner was flat-out amazing; there was no other description to be found for it. Roxas was truly a secretly-talented chef, though he refused to take credit and said they should thank his mother and the cook he used to bother at their house farther north. The food was beyond delicious, savory and scrumptious; the veal melted in Axel's mouth, the flavors blooming with each bite. The gnocchi were tender and perfectly paired with the simple, yet flavorful sauce. Wine and water were passed around liberally along with the loaves of fresh bread he and Roxas had found earlier. It summed up the culinary experience Axel had in Rome. How would he be able to go home and eat anything else, that is to say 'less.' What could he possibly eat that would overshadow this meal? Everyone got along beautifully too, as if they'd all been friends for years – even Hayner, ever prickly around Axel, seemed to relax and laugh more. For a few hours, Axel forgot about everything. He forgot about the suitcases back at his apartment, the stress of the following morning, the impending plane. Life was positively beautiful.
Then, in the middle of shared joyous laughter, Axel caught Roxas' gaze; Roxas too was laughing, his smile broad across his face, cerulean blue eyes alight with humor and happiness – and Axel felt himself fall all over again.
Roxas' happy expression fell suddenly by degrees, the light and love draining from his face.
As if everyone else was catching on to the dying mood, the rest of the table fell into silence. Then Pence and Olette shared a glance, and they both smiled encouragingly. "It is late," she said, grabbing an emptied plate. "We should clean, I think."
Axel put his hand on Roxas' arm, nodding his head in the direction of the sink. Let's go help.
When they were done with the dishes, no one seemed to know what to do. Finally Olette tackled Axel, hugging him tightly as they exchanged kisses on either cheek. She touched his cheek, her grin wavering. "I am happy to have met you, Axel. Go well." Then she released him, allowing Pence and Hayner to wish him goodbye as well.
Roxas approached him somberly after. I'll take you back, he whispered.
"Axel, are you coming or…" Demyx asked loudly, trailing off when he looked back noticing Axel lingering back with Roxas.
Zexion caught on immediately. "We'll see you back at the apartment," he nodded, dragging Demyx behind him.
"We'll, ah, we'll take a cab," Demyx offered hastily and unnecessarily, seeing as they'd arrived via cab, leaving Axel with the other residents of Roxas' apartment.
"I'll wait up," Olette promised, and Roxas nodded slightly in acknowledgement.
They headed out into the courtyard, finding Roxas' old white moped not long after. Roxas offered Axel his helmet and said quietly, Let's go for a drive.
Axel held on tightly, his arms wrapped around Roxas' waist as they drove at a remarkably leisurely pace for the blond. The bright lights and lanterns lining the main streets blurred together and reflected in the water as they drove over the Tiber. Roxas wasn't taking him back to his apartment – at least not yet it appeared, and he was just fine with that.
When it didn't appear that Roxas was going to stop, Axel realized he was giving him one last look at the city and its eternal beauty. He let himself take it all in, the images overwhelming his memory until he just couldn't do it anymore. Still he prayed to whatever deities were listening to slow time – just to slow it for a little while so he could stay with Roxas longer.
Despite all off Axel's internal pleas to slow time, they pulled up in front of Axel's apartment far, far too quickly. Roxas killed the motor on the moped, leaving Axel with a distinct, overwhelming feeling of defeat. He slowly dismounted the moped, fingers fumbling at the helmet strap under his chin. Roxas mirrored his movements, and put his helmet down on the seat; Axel suddenly had to realize, this was it. There would be no Facebook communication for them – Roxas had shut that down quickly, he didn't want to try and maintain what they had over the internet. After this, Axel was gone – another student who came and went.
Axel trailed a knuckle over the open V of Roxas' shirt, realizing for the first time that the blond wasn't wearing his omnipresent necklace and charms. Where's your necklace? he asked curiously, lightly touching the top of Roxas' scar.
Roxas knocked his hand away and tangled his hands in Axel's hair, pulling him down level with Roxas' face forcefully. Lips were against his immediately, the kiss hard and wanting and everything they had been together; tumultuous and tentative at times, marked by an overwhelming desire to remain with the other, lingering and beautiful even when it came to an end. Axel found himself stealing smaller kisses just to keep from having to pull away, his hands grasping desperately at Roxas' jacket as the blond tugged at Axel's hair and dragged his nails across his broad shoulders.
It was Roxas who ended it, whispering in Axel's ear; then his hands formed a vice-like grip on Axel's upper arms and forcibly kept him in place as Roxas withdrew from his embrace. Axel stared after him, ignoring the empty feeling is his arms and chest as Roxas fumbled with his helmet and swung his leg over the other side of the bike and kick-started the engine. A quick glance over his shoulder, and Roxas was gone.
As the sound of the blond's moped dissipated and it disappeared around a corner, Axel finally moved, his feet shifting like lead to unlock the door to his apartment building.
"Ci vediamo," Roxas had whispered. We'll see each other. Axel hoped he was right.
0o0
Two mornings.
The first:
When Axel woke early Thursday morning, he stared at the ceiling of his room blankly for about an hour, watching as the rising sun slowly creeped along the ceiling. Not even Xigbar's snoring could bother him. But once everyone started to wake up, chaos reigned. They had to finish packing. They had to clean the apartment one last time, and get all of their luggage out to catch the bus to Termini. From that point it was a train to the airport, then customs, then . . . a six hour trip to the east coast.
"Let's move," Lexaeus said in his booming voice. "There is a bus heading towards Termini in half an hour."
"Some of us might need to call a taxi," Xigbar chuckled snidely, looking at a few well-stuffed bags that would probably prove difficult to carry.
"Let them decide on that then," Lexaeus said with an uninterested shrug.
"Did anyone leave anything behind?" Demyx asked for the fifth time, just for good measure. "If you leave it you'll never see it-"
"They get it, Dem," Axel sighed, cutting his best friend off as he hefted his own heavy bags.
"Just making sure," Demyx said defensively. "You know how jittery traveling makes me."
"Get your jitters out now," Zexion said pointedly, "because I am NOT putting up with you being twitchy and obnoxious the whole way back. I WILL KILL YOU," he said, his voice ringing threateningly.
"I thought I was sitting with Axel," Demyx responded, sounding confused.
"You are," Zexion clarified. "But I'm sitting in front of you, and if you spend six hours kicking my chair I will break your nose, among other things." Then the smaller man headed right for the door, not looking back.
"Oh," Demyx squeaked, his eyes wide. Even his expertly-styled Mohawk seemed to deflate.
Axel snickered. "That was funny."
"So glad I could be of some amusement," Demyx grumbled, throwing his backpack across his shoulders.
The late April sun made a walk around Rome quite pleasant – but not so much for those dragging heavy suitcases and backpacks laden with clothes, souvenirs, technology and keepsakes. They made for quite a sight, and Demyx had even mentioned feeling like he was part of a herd of pack-mules. Just walking down the street to catch the bus had become a chore, made even worse by trying to fit everyone and their luggage into a relatively well-packed bus.
A fast-paced walk to the Leonardo express was the only semblance of fresh air they got before being herded onto the stiflingly hot and crowded high-speed train. Due to lack of seating, Axel found himself sitting on top of one of his bags in the hallway of the train, rocking back and forth numbly as it rocketed down its track.
Fiumicino Airport was just as Axel remembered, he thought as he finally collapsed into one of the chairs in their terminal after what felt like hours of standing in line to check their bags, to go through security and customs and finally get to the right section. Their plane hadn't even arrived yet.
The second:
Roxas knew he was rushing.
The exam meant almost nothing to him; he could almost do it in his sleep. English came much easier to him now, the words and spellings flowing as he scrambled through his essay.
He'd already sent Axel a message, but something nagged at him deep in his chest – a soaring, churning feeling that whispered go go go go in his mind.
So he went, finishing up his essay without a second glance and rushing for the door, Olette cheering him on from down the hall.
0o0
Axel hated waiting.
The plane had finally boarded, and despite several vocal arguments with stewardesses about the size of some carry-ons it appeared they were getting ready to leave the gate. He hated how sick he felt, a constant sensation of something being crushed against his chest making it difficult to breathe.
Axel leaned down and looked out the tiny airplane window, trying to get one last look at Fiumicino and its wide glass panes; he could vaguely see their boarding area as the plane began to move slowly. His heart suddenly lurched – Roxas was standing right behind the panes; he looked like nothing more than a ghost reflected in the glass, his palm pressed flat as if trying to break through. Axel felt his heart rip in two; it was screaming he came, he came! and what are you doing, you can't leave now, but Axel knew this was it. The end, period, full stop. The plane was moving, already drawing away from the gate – and Roxas already looked farther away than he'd ever been.
As they pulled away from the airport and onto the runway one of the stewardesses came around and reminded him to turn off his cell phone. Axel started and nodded, pulling out his phone from one of his pockets. He blinked owlishly; there was a 'nuovo messagio' icon taking up the screen. As she walked away Axel opened the message, his heart racing.
Check your backpack, was all it said.
Axel turned the phone off like he was told and pulled his backpack out from underneath the seat in front of him, brows furrowing in confusion. What could be in his backpack? Did Roxas leave him something?
After some searching and sifting through his belongings in the bag, his fingers closed upon an envelope whose origins he didn't know; he pulled it out from underneath a set of clothes, then stuffed his backpack back under. It was small and plain, and there was something in the envelope, heavier than paper and much bulkier. He opened it up and tipped the contents into his hand.
It was Roxas' necklace – the one Axel never saw him take off, its silver chain still carrying each of the charms Roxas kept. The one he'd called 'precious.' Axel fingered the chain and charms reverently, feeling his heart swell ridiculously in his chest.
A wide smile spread across his face; the text could have said he'd won a million dollars, or maybe even a new car, or any number of amazing things – he wouldn't have cared one bit. This was worth more than all of that.
Demyx was saying his name curiously, but Axel didn't hear him at all.
Not even Larxene's invasive questions about it or Xigbar's snide remarks could take this moment away from him.
This was his, and his alone.