Thanks so much for all the lovely positive reviews. I don't want to let any of you down with this fic. Enjoy the latest installment
Carla was having more and more of those dreams again. Sometimes they were normal, the usual playing around together as children. She still had the disturbing with Liam uttering because I can, but lately more and more memories of the growing intimacy between the two have found their way into Carla's subconscious. They were memories of kisses on the cheek, of hugs that were innocent until they weren't anymore, and that uncontrollable giddiness she felt even as a child whenever Liam was around her. Then there was the memory she had tried so hard to bury; the one Dr. Harrington had brought up, it kept on seeping through when she least expected it. It was triggered by the simplest of things; there was no escaping it. She had dreamed of it last night.
"Can I come in?"
He stands in her doorway his naturally rosy cheeks enhanced from the outside air from which he just came. His black hair has been made messy by the wind and his blue eyes are dancing with anticipation. Liam stands in front Carla with such confidence; he demands her full attention. Carla steps aside to let him in.
"What are you doing here Liam?" Carla's heart is still beating loudly as she tries to steady her voice. Her attempt to come across as annoyed falters as she is intrigued by Liam's presence."
Liam slips out of his grey coat and takes off his scarf draping it over a sitting chair.
"I need to talk to you Carla?"
"What about? Is it about Paul, is Michelle ok?"
"They are fine," Liam says. His eyes are more intense than ever and it is making Carla nervous. Her hands are sweating and she begins to play with her necklace. "How come you never ask after me?"
"Well you're right here, 6"1 perfectly healthy Irishman, you look fine to me."
"Well I'm not."
" Well what's wrong with you then?" Carla says shuffling her feet. She is getting flustered just looking at his beautiful face. Ever since they were little Liam had a way of making women shower him with attention for mysterious aliments
"What do you think?"
"I don't read minds Liam."
"You really don't know what this is about Carla?"
"NO! If I did I would have said so already."
"Fine then, I just have to know something. Do you really think he'll be enough for you, my brother Paul?"
Carla's heart was now beating uncontrollably and she felt ashamed of herself as she began to blush. Liam must have noticed. Why did he have to do this now? She felt her knees going weak and she try to walk backwards as to increase the space between them. But with every step backwards Liam moved closer until he had her locked against a corner of the hotel room. Carla could feel the heat of him, it was sensual, and it was warming. But she tried not to look at him as he clasped her cheek with his right hand. It was unbearable.
"Carla," he whispers in her ear and she feels as though she could ignite. "Look at me, look at me please," he pleads. Carla forces herself to look at him; the weight of his stare makes her want to fall apart in his arms.
"Please Liam," Carla musters, "Let me go."
"I can't Carla, please don't ask me to. I look at you and I feel like I could crumble. Every time I see you all I can think about is how I want to kiss you, I have loved you since we were little Carla."
She knows her pleads for him to stop are pointless, he knows what she really wants, him. He leans in slowly locking his deep blue eyes into her green and holding her there with deep anticipation, slowly wrapping his hands around her waist. His breathing is shallow and once more he whispers her name. His kiss is hungry and Carla responds just as hungrily meeting his tongue with equal pressure. Slowly she moves her hands through his black hair. She is in heaven
Oh my god! What am I doing? I am marrying Paul tomorrow. Carla's euphoria becomes overshadowed by guilt. She pushes Liam off of her, away from her, feeling flustered. Liam is out of breath his eyes searching hers. His victory short lived.
"This is a mistake Liam. You can't feel this way about me. I'm marrying Paul tomorrow." Carla tries to stifle the sobs giving way in her voice.
"You don't love him Carla."
"You don't know anything about it Liam!" Carla turns away from him to face the wall. "You have no right coming here and doing this."
"If you don't feel anything for me, then look at me and tell me to my face you don't love me."
"I don't love you Liam. I can't…"
" You don't or you can't? I didn't ask you if you couldn't."
"Fine I don't!"
"Liar, you're such a liar Carla and you know it. Look at me and say it to my face."
Carla turns around to face him. His face is pleading; he is yearning for her and she for him. She knows the battle is lost. It has always been a losing battle for both of them. Carla is in tears now.
"Look at me Carla…"
He is pulling her in once more.
Ring Ring Carla's mobile brings her back to the present once more. She picks it up immediately. It's Maria and she wants to talk, she wants to hash things out. She will be ready to have Carla over in the evening. Carla hangs up the phone bewildered, why is Maria ready to talk to her now she wonders. She walks into the bathroom, filling up the tub. As the water fills, Carla can think of nothing more than wanting to return to her past, to everything that ever existed between her and Liam.
Maria didn't even know what really possessed her to do it. But for weeks she felt uneasy. She needed to talk about it or it would eat her alive. So she picked up the phone and she dialed Carla's number. Each stroke, she thought of how many times he dialed it to, how many times did Liam call Carla when things were eating at him? Everyone keeps on saying she needs to let go, what happened between Liam and Carla. And sometimes she really feels she should forgive them. It wasn't really the past that bothered her so much lately, but it was looking at photo's of Liam and trying to decipher every smile, every gesture and realizing she would never fully understand the man she called her husband. The pain was in the fact that she couldn't know everything he did; Liam had a whole life outside of her, a life that existed long before she ever came into the picture. A life in which he harbored a long-standing desire for a woman he could never truly have. That was the Liam that Maria married, the only one she ever knew. Carla was his constant. And lately whenever Carla tried to apologize for everything, Maria found herself wondering what exactly everything was. It could very well destroy her but if she ever wanted to forgive Carla she needed to know everything about his husband and Carla Connor's relationship.