AN: im jus ritin dis now becuz i gut a butload o insparashun (That would be constipation, honey. Not inspiration.)
den i went 2 hagwats (That sounds like a sexual slang term, or an STD.) dena nigga came out a no were an says "hey im harry potter". i turned an said "u aint harry potter!11 i saw him in da movis!" (Wow….)
"i no but fo da audeance dey got a wite boi 2 play mi" (Only three words in the whole sentence were spelled correctly. Impressive.)
"wat i said. (Two.)
"u herd mi" (ZERO.)
"dem rassist ppl!" (Still zero.)
i entred da big ol place were everabodi eatz an dey put da wiserd hat on mi hed and it says "yo in ravenclaw" (I love that wiserd hat. 'Yo in Ravenclaw, bitchezzzz.')
"hey daz were i stay" sed harry potter (Canon rape! Harry Potter's in Gryffindor). den we both went to da room togedder (Gimme a homo! Gimma a sexual! No, just kidding). wen we were dere we saw the dumbldoor (I've never heard of that kind of door before.) an he turnt 2 mi an sez "welcum 2 skool distrect 7 (wateva dat meens). (You're writing this, not me) im ur dumbledoor." (This door can turn around! And talk!)
hairy turnd t mi an seys "dis is da dumbledoor of da entire skool." (Oooh, one door for the whole school!)
"hi mistr duumbledoor"
"yo can call mi alvin". (A chipmunk-themed door.)
"ok alvin"
"goodbi" he sed an raned out on hiz broomstik. (Wait…a door on a broomstick? I'm starting to worry…that it isn't what I think it is…could it be?)
"im sleepi" sed hairy potter (Where'd the hairy potter appear from? Do they have pottery classes at Hagwats?)
"butt (ROFL) its not even 12 o clock yet" i sed (Midnight? Do they all turn into fried chicken?)
"i no but tomorow we hav skool an ill sho u all de pretti girlz an how to play bromstiks" (You mean QUIDDITCH.)
"sho" i sed "do u lik 50 cent?"
"do u lik soulja boi?" sed harry (Socrates says, answer every question with another question.)
we were best frends. (That was faster than in Sims3.)