Disclaimer:I do not, in any way shape or form, own Bleach—I merely play with the characters. Any extra characters mentioned, however, are my creations alone.

Author's Note:Too bad chap four isn't about Ulquiorra, but oh well you gotta do what you gotta do…anyways! Hurray that I actually came up with something for these two, but since my mind refuses to be any more creative I'm only making one chap for them and then one chap for StaHall so prepare for the long chapter ahead!

◙█Grimm

Capítulo Cuatro—A Call from Hell

Szayel's POV

Szayel was still a bit angered with himself for accidentally assigning himself with Nnoitra, but he knew getting angry over it would not change the fact that he did.

"Wowza! Look at that babe!" Nnoitra jumped up and down, pointing at different babes each time. Szayel sighed; this is going to be one hell of a long two weeks, at least in my case.

"No, wait," Nnoitra ran over to a random outdoor photo shoot, "these girls are real babes."

Szayel rolled his eyes.

Nnoitra gave him an "I'm-annoyed-with-your-attitude pout, "why must you act all Grimmy on me whenever I talk?"

"It's just that I don't understand why you are so infatuated with human females," Szayel sighed.

"Your just jealous because you don't got what they do, Suzie." Nnoitra stuck out his chin then ran ahead to separate a currently sucking-face couple on a bench.

"My name is not Suzie!" Szayel shouted after him then shook his head. Whatever, it is pointless to argue with the likes of him.

Szayel turned his head at the sound of a random song go off next to him. He watched a female fumble through her bag to find something.

Akaku, akaku, akaku…

"Let's see who's calling me…" she pulled out an oval shaped object, frowned, then flipped it open and spoke to it. "What is it, Takahiro?" the female tapped her foot in annoyance.

"Excuse me Miss," Szayel interrupted her, "I hope you don't mind me asking, but why are you talking to an object? Does it help you to relax or something?"

The female gave him a look that said 'where-the-hell-have-you-been?' and replied, "It's called a cell phone, pink-haired weirdo. What are you, a hundred or something? How could you not know what a cell phone is? Oh I'm sorry, Takahiro!" her face changed and she started walking away in the other direction. Szayel was fuming by now! How dare that lowly human call him stupid?

"Hey, Suzie! I thought you were against wasting time and here you are, just standing there like a space cadet!" Nnoitra shook his butt ahead with his hands cupped around his mouth, acting like his usual idiot-self.

"Do not start with me, Quinto." Szayel narrowed his eyes and stomped ahead to meet up with him.

"Hey," Nnoitra nudged him when he caught up with him, "don't go all Ulquiorra on me now, OK?"

"I do not act like him and you know it! What is with your obsession with those two lately, anyhow?" Szayel clicked his tongue.

"What two?"

"Auuugh! You are so irritating! The Cuarta and the Sexta, who else, dumbass!" Szayel pulled at his hair.

"Dude, Check out that chick's jugs! They look like three gallons!" He had already lost him.

So Szayel took off ahead of Nnoitra to look for some way to earn money for a hotel himself, but so far his efforts were futile.

"Hey Beena, doesn't that guy look just like that one old model from 'Boys Be'?" he overheard a girl talking to a fellow female.

"Yeah he so does! Let's go ask for an autograph!" Szayel stared at the females as they bounced towards him with notebooks in their hands.

"Omigosh, omigosh! Do you mind giving us your autograph, Aporro-nii?" the girls giggled at him. How the hell did they know his name? Whatever might as well go with the flow for now since they were supposed to focus on the idiot this week; him the next.

"Would you pay for it if I did?" He gave them an innocent smile.

"KYAAAAAAAAAAA! I'd pay ¥10,000 if I had to!" the first female squealed, then soon followed by the other.

"Give us a second, would ya please?" the second female chirped, and then she did the craziest thing—she turned around and flipped up her shirt! Immediately guys came running, as she wiggled from side to side, and started throwing yen at her to touch her breasts. It was insane! She suddenly flipped her shirt back down, bent down, picked up the currency and shoved it down her shirt. She turned around and blinked at Szayel then made a face of realization, took back out the currency, mentally counted it and thrust it at him.

"Here ya go, Aporro-nii, I hope that covers for both of us, teehee~!" they both giggled then squealed after he signed their notebooks and ran off like that. He shrugged and pocketed the money, how odd…

"There you are, Szayel! I was worried shitless, I mean I thought I'd lost you!" Nnoitra cried as he ran to him and kneeled over with his hands on his knees after catching up, all out of breath. "Don't…ever…do that…again…"

"Szayel just smirked evilly and said, "well if you weren't so focused on your current babes you wouldn't have just missed the titty show displayed by a young n' fresh babe just a few moments ago, now wouldn't you have?" Szayel patted his back in pity, still smiling.

Nnoitra's jaw dropped, "say wha—?"

"Come on, I have money now—let's go find a hotel and check in for the night, ey?" Szayel patted him once again. Nnoitra groaned in protest but came along anyway. "Oh! I almost forgot about my brilliant idea—how about we earn enough yen to buy cheap cell phones for everyone so that we can communicate in case of an emergency?"

"…what's a cell phone?"

"Awesome! Only one bed!~" Nnoitra clapped.

"You are seriously sick," Szayel glared at him, "try anything funny and you sleep on the couch from then on."

"I'm stronger than you!" Nnoitra pointed out the obvious.

"And I am smarter than you and you also keep seeming to forget—I'm the one with the yen." Szayel snapped back, "and do you really want to start something right here and now? It wouldn't be so smart…"

"No…" he pouted in the other direction.

"Wow you are actually acting your age for once—hurray!" Szayel clapped on like him.

"Fuck you."

"Love you, too!" he walked over to the shopping bag from before they checked in, picked it up and pulled out a—pink n' sparkly short transparent night gown with ruffles at the bottom. "Nnoitra!" he popped five veins and screeched at him like a harpy.

Nnoitra just laughed and clapped, "hey you can't blame me for thinking you'd look cute in that!~"

"You are never going shopping for us ever again." He clenched his teeth, but changed into the skimpy thing anyways. Anything is better than sleeping in dirty clothes, icky.

Nnoitra seemed to be having a tough time deciding which side of the bed to sleep on so Szayel pushed him out of his way and walk-ran over to the right side in annoyance. "Is it really that hard, Nnoitra?"

"Yes, yes it is—it is a big deal for me trying to consider which side I would be able to sleep on the longest without tossing and turning. And you do look really sexy just lying there in that transparent nighty, Suzie-chan," Nnoitra winked at him.

Szayel shivered in disgust, "just shut up and jump in bed already." He clapped, causing the light to snap off, then pulled up the blankets and scooted as close to the edge as possible—thank goodness the bed is king-sized.

"If you so insist, Sherlie."

Couldn't he just decide on a nickname already?

Nnoitra's POV

Nnoitra's eyes suddenly snapped open at 2:38am and glinted in the dark. He smiled his creeper smile and let a small, dark chuckle escape. I need to know if it is small or not, I need to know of it is small or not…he repeated to himself over and over again. He slid next to Szayel as quietly as possible then hoisted himself up and leaned over him, his hair draping to the left and resting on Szayel's ass. He slowly moved his hand to hover in front of Szayel's private area, and then gently lifted up the skimpy night gown until just the lacey underwear was showing. Heh-heh he wore that, too, eh? Good Szayel…He slid down the panties only to find a locked chastity belt. He frowned, what the fuck! Who the hell wears a fucking chastity belt these days? He suddenly squinted when he saw something gleam on the lock just as he was about to attempt the combination. What is—a micro-scopic camera? Oh, shit am I so fucked!

Nnoitra silently pulled back up the panties even though he knew it was pointless now. He scooted carefully back over to his spot and faced the wall's direction. Nnoitra cried in fear that Szayel will hate him even more than he already does—until he blacked out again.

Szayel's POV

Szayel just knew Nnoitra was going to pull something. He woke up the minute he felt Nnoitra's body heat brush him, although it was very evanescent. The saddest part? He let him attempt to violate him, knowing he'd eventually hit that dead end, though. He just listened to the sound of Nnoitra's sniffles and had to giggle—it was just so hysterical! And he thought Nnoitra could give less of a shit whether he hated him or not—guess he was wrong? No—he was never wrong, how could he ever think of such a stupid reasoning as that?

Suddenly the sniffles stopped and soft snoring took its place.

Szayel pulled up his legs and hugged himself. He really did miss that lab of his, wishing they could just go back already. Was Aizen really dead? He had a sneaky suspicion that the bastard surrendered and got himself jailed if anything—he just never took him for the type to let himself die. He started to see black spots blot at his vision, op! Looks like sleep is taking over…

And then the blackness took over…

Bright lights.

A cheering crowd.

Overwhelming anxiety.

I can't really see where I'm going, but I know I have to reach where the light is peering from. I am wearing heals and a very long, silky pink dress—that much I know. 'Where are my glasses?' I wonder, but the thought is completely evaporated when I reach the light.

The crowd goes wild now as I take to the cat walk, taking small steps yet striding with confidence. My dress trails behind me like fairy dust from the flying sparkles and the back frills flaring out like wispy wings. I feel so beautiful walking so elegantly with rose buds being thrown at me, kisses blown towards me, and flashing lights signal pictures being taken. I felt a smile coming on and was about to let it lose when I spotted a small, lanky fifteen year-old shoving his way through the crowd. He looked like he was desperately trying to escape something—or maybe someone? I turned around slowly and headed towards back-stage after the walk ended, still keeping up my elegant stride, however. Out of the corner of my eye I saw the teen push open the emergency alley-way exit doors.

Backstage everyone congratulated me and offered me wine, but I just blew through them with a 'thank you' or a 'no thanks'—for I had to reach the teen quickly. I grabbed a fuzzy brown fur coat off the rack and pushed open the EXIT doors. Once out in the alley, I looked this way and that for the kid until I finally spotted him sitting on a cardboard box. The teen stood up and ran to me, shivering and wide-eyed.

"You have to help me, p-please." He gripped my dress.

"Shh you're shivering," I cut him off and draped the fuzzy coat over his shoulders, "we can talk about it in my car. Come now—"

"N-no, w-we have to ge-get inside you don't understand he's c-coming!" He started pulling at my dress now and attempting to usher me towards the door.

"Who's coming?"

"Stop hesitating and co—" his eyes widened, "he's here." He gulped.

"Wh—" I whipped around and stared at a man in a black coat in front of me. "Why hello there, are you by chance threatening this te—" I stepped back and shut up when I saw the knife the man was holding shine in the street light, but it had already struck my neck. A big gash opened and I saw my own blood taint the beautiful white snow. I rolled my eyes to look at the teen and saw he was shouting something but I couldn't hear. I then looked back at my attacker as I continued to fall in what seemed to be in slow motion. Black splotches began to cover my vision and I couldn't breathe.

I was soon falling, fading away into a cruel blackness…

Szayel's eyes flew open and a tear drop rolled down his currently glazed over with sweat face, but he soon came to realize that he was clutching onto Nnoitra—and digging his nails into his back—for dear life it seemed. He slowly pulled his head out of Nnoitra's chest and looked up at him with wide eyes. That awful dream caused me to act like this?

"Did you have a nightmare, Sweetie pie?" Nnoitra smiled like his usual self.

Szayel glared at him.

"It is OK because I had half a nightmare, too. Well it was more of a sense that the nightmare would frighten you rather than me, but whatever it was still a nightmare."

"Just get on with it already, idiot."

"Snow—I was watching snow fall from a clear, black sky. And I kept on watching the snow until my view zoomed in and focused on one single snowflake. The snowflake seemed to be having a hard time trying to stay up like it refused to meet its destination. But the snowflake eventually did reach its destination and just sat there, on a strand of pink hair resting on a pale-peach cheek. Then the screen zoomed back out and focused from above—bird's eye view—on you lying on the ground. Except there was no smartass smirk on your face like usual—there was no trace of life in your eyes at all. And yet, the snow continued to fall on you from above as if saying that life still goes on even though you were clearly dead there. But all of a sudden,"Nnoitra now lay on his back and started gesturing with his hands, "your eyes snapped over and seemed to be focusing on me. Your lips parted and whispered in a creepy tone, 'five years from now—he'll kill you next'. And that's when you were hurriedly dragged backwards and out of my view, blood trailing behind you and leaking from a gash in your neck at the same time. A big garbage bag was dropped after you were out of sight and your arm was sticking out of the opening, then a gloved hand came down and shoved your hand to fit in the bag and tied up the bag. As the bag was slowly dragged away, only then did my vision start to fade to black. And then I woke up." He looked at Szayel, who had on a stupefied expression.

"When you explain your dreams you actually sound smart, too bad you don't normally talk so serious." Szayel gawked in fake-surprise.

"You know what? Fuck you! I'm actually being serious for once and you still choose to make fun of me for it. Never again, never again…" Nnoitra pushed off of the bed and trailed off into the bathroom.

"You know I was only expressing my surprise!" Szayel shouted, causing Nnoitra to lean out of the bathroom and flick up his middle finger at him and only then did he shut the door, slamming it in the process. Why do I even bother…

"Tell me again why we are in a gas station because there are absolutely no babes in here." Nnoitra complained.

"Would you just shut up? I wanted to try a slushy, is that too much to ask, Quinto?" Szayel wrinkled his nose as he held down the handle, watching the sticky liquid pour into his cup.

"There you go acting all Ulquiorra again…" Nnoitra walked away and found a sudden interest in the twirling hot dogs.

Szayel picked up his cup and walked over to the cashier who was currently nowhere in sight. He stared at the charity lollipop box to help find missing children and blinked at the picture of the latest missing child. The kid could be a perfect candidate for Nnoitra if he wasn't so damn cute. He tilted his head and read the big 'found' printed across the flyer. He then looked up at the name spot and almost spat out his slushy—Nnoitra Gilga was printed after the colon. Just then, the cashier came from the back room and rang up his slushy.

"Excuse me, Miss," Szayel turned to look at her.

"What?" she bobbled her head, "your total is ¥109, by the way." She blew a bubble and it popped on her face. He handed her the yen and watched her put it in the cash register, stretch the gum off of her face and rolled it in a ball, stuck it in her hair and walked to the back room where she entered from.

"Hey Ichi! Let me give you a BJ." He heard the girl pop another bubblegum piece. How many did she have in her mouth?

"You already did fifteen seconds ago, Fruitalupe!" the guy shouted back.

"You know what? Fuck you, Kevin fucking Jonas!" she walked back out and stared at Szayel. "Why are you still here, Pink Princess? You got what you came here for now get!"

He popped a vein, but spoke his mind anyway, "I wanted to know what happened to this kid here," he pointed to the missing kid picture.

She leaned over to peer at it and blew another bubble, "oh, that kid? He was like, on the news like two weeks ago. A sewer cleaner happened to find his soaked up body only he had the structure of a twenty-one year old. It is too bad such a cute kid was forced to spend his life in the basement of some rapist pedophile until he was finally murdered when he got too old for the guy's likings. They caught the pedo, though. But I can understand why the pedo chose him—I would wanna bang that cute shit, too, uh-huh I so would!" she smacked her ass and Nnoitra was heard shouting 'yes' in the background.

She peered over at him and tusked, "Ew! Not you fool, you ugly! Although you do look like the older version of the kid! Now if you'd excuse me," she dug down he pants, pulled out anal beads and dangled them in front of her, "I got some business to attend to." She pulled the gum piece out of her hair and popped it back in her mouth, making an 'ok' face as she chewed it then popped another bubble and walked away to the back room for a third time.

"Uh! How dare you cheat on me, Ichi! You really are a Kevin Jonas you teme!"

"Get away from me, Fruitalupe! Ahhhhhhhhh!" smacking metal sounds were heard, which Szayel assumed were from the anal beads.

"Come on, Nnoitra; let's go find the police station. I found out how you died already," Szayel chimed, happy that they were finally going to move onto him soon.

"Alrighty—let's go!" Nnoitra fist-pumped and ran over to him.

"Hello officer," Nnoitra tried his best to smile innocently at the officer behind the deputy's desk, "I'm a second cousin of the recently found missing child Nnoitra Gilga. You see I was so close to him and was very sad when he went missing—I'd just like to know what became of him. More importantly, is he a-alive?"

The officer gave him a look of pity and shared the bad news, "I am sorry sir, but I'm afraid your cousin was recently found dead in a street sewer two weeks ago. We tracked down his murderer and discovered that he had been kidnapped about twenty years ago and was a consistent rape victim each day. All I can really do for you is tell you where his resting place is and that's all." The officer shrugged.

"Why don't you give him the boy's diary since he was so close to him, Kharl? We don't need it for the investigation anymore since the case is closed now." Another officer behind the desk in the working area pushed back from his computer in a wheelie chair.

Kharl sighed, "I suppose it couldn't hurt now. Well hand it over, Hiro." Hiro handed him the diary. "By the way, did I mention that you look just like Mr. Gilga's dead body, what's-your-name?" Kharl thrust the diary at him.

"Noritora," he took the diary and smiled at the cop's shocked face, Szayel laughing behind him. "Thanks for giving me back my diary, Deputy Kharl, and maybe you should lie down, you're lookin' a bit pale—like you've just seen a ghost. Ciao~!" He skipped after Szayel out of the building and laughed. "That was so much fun~!"

"So out with it—what does the first entry say?" Szayel grinned at him. Nnoitra flipped open the diary to the first page and continued to laugh.

It read—

Author's E/N: Like my little cliffie ending? *Waggles brows* Mwuhahaha! You'll never know how this one ends, but you will receive an idea of what it said lol it is hysterical I promise!~

Just edited my typos that I found while reading it to my bro and sis xD I guess that's the upside of re-reading ur fics ^^ Oh and also ik you all know I hate writing in first person, but the next chapter starts in first-person bc I just could not picture it told in any other way :O halfway through it (at least I think it'll be halfway) I'm switching back to third person. Thank you for reading my not rly important news if ya did! 3