Hawkeye vs. The Black Widow!
"The hell?" Clint screamed. "Get out!"
Natasha raised an eyebrow. "You're in my room. You get out."
Clint stared at her, slack-jawed, and then made a move to open the door.
"What, are you going to stand in the hall for six minutes?"
"Yep." Clint said, still facing the door. "What in the name of Satan's testicles are you doing here?" he demanded.
"Sit down and I'll tell you."
Clint turned and stared calmly at her. She was smiling at him in a way that made him instinctively reach for his knife. Which he wasn't wearing... he swore under his breath, and moved to sit.
"This is just like Churchill all over again."
Clint froze, his eyes darting around the room "Why? Are you planning to throw a polar bear at me?"
Natasha gave an easy laugh. "No. And in my defence, the bear wasn't injured. Actually, I think he kinda' liked it."
"You are deranged. And what the hell are you doing? I brought Steve here to- Jesus!" Clint suddenly cried. "This is why he looked so freaked out a minute ago. Nat, what did you do to him?"
"Nothing" Natasha said defensively. "We talked. Like reasonably normal people."
Clint was silent, letting his rising eyebrows do the talking.
"It was good. We just talked. It was good practice. For him. The man has courage under fire, I'll give him that."
Clint shook his head. "One night. We take one night off from the team, from the crazy that is our lives, and here you are, barnstorming our event. You are... shameless!"
"Someone has to look out for him, and clearly you're not doing a very good job of it. You say you brought him along to meet women- but this is all just for your ego. And that's fine, Clint. Ego it up. Just don't drag Steve into it."
Clint stared hard at her. "Do you have a crush on Captain America?"
"No."
"Then why do you think he needs looking after?"
It was Natasha's turn to stare hard at Clint. "Do you have any idea how shy that guy is?"
"He's fine!"
"No he's not. He can barely talk to women unless they're in a uniform. Do you realise he's never actually had a girlfriend, and is most likely still a virgin."
"Wait. What?"
Natasha shrugged. "Social norms were different back then. He was different back then. Just because he's a brave son-of-a-bitch in battle doesn't mean you can throw him to the wolves here. And these chicks are wolves, trust me. We were mingling before we came in- I didn't like a single one of them for him. "
Clint considered Natasha, something cunning growing behind his eyes. "You're his fairy godmother."
"What the hell are you talking about?"
Clint shook his head, a gleeful look on his face. "I thought you were here to mess with me, but no! No, this is way better. You're protecting Steve. This is... sweet! This is adorable! Man, wait til I tell Tony! Wait til I tell Fury!" Clint crowed.
Natasha raised an eyebrow. "That's it? You think you've figured out, and you're off the hook?"
"Yep" Clint said smugly.
"I got news for you, Barton... your fly is undone. Did you realise? It's all the way down. When you walked in here and sat down, I'm pretty sure I could see underwear. Or something."
Clint's eyes darted down, and he struggled not to take her bait.
"Have a great night." Natasha said serenely.
Author's note: You asked for it, and here it is. I hope you're not disappointed! I wasn't sure how their interaction would go, but I'm happy it turned out like this. Also, NO idea where the polar bear thing came from, just popped into my head, so I went with it. Make of it what you will! Again, thank you for all the lovely feedback and encouragement and favouriting of the series, it means a lot to a fic writer! Obligatory disclaimer- I own nothing here, and earn nothing but praise!