A/N: Wow I just checked the word count and this chapter isn't that long but it feels like it :O Yay.
Okay um I realised while writing this that I put to much of myself into this chapter, those who know me might make connections but that's about it.
Any who how are you guys? Good I hope :D
Okay I don't really have anything to say sorry :P
Enjoy
WARNING: Trigger warning.
Disclaimer: I do not own Glee or any movies, musicals, songs, events, products, clothing, labels, schools, names or anything else you can think of I own nothing except my imagination.
This is a Kurt/Blaine fic, so if you don't like boy x boy then there is a little 'x' button in the right hand corner of this page feel free to click it in times of closed mindedness.
NOW
Kurt couldn't stop thinking about how he was going to get his fake ID, his first idea was to ask Noah Puckerman but he was a part of the glee club and the glee club was notorious for not keeping secrets. So he knew he had to go out side of the club, he'd walked over to the back of the bleachers, his hands clammy as he did, he knew this was where they hung out, the Skanks.
A very odd name since the word 'skank' was derogatory and just plain rude so why would they title themselves that? Kurt didn't understand but he had the three girls and now Quinn?
"Quinn?" Kurt asked startled, he hadn't seen her since the last day of school the previous year and now she had pink hair and a tye died skirt.
"Kurt," Quinn acknowledged in her breath filled voice.
"Nice get up," Kurt said with a smile, he couldn't deny it, the look actually suited her, Quinn showed a flicker of a smile in his direction but that was it, her bad girl facade falling over her face a moment after.
"What do you want Hummel?" The girl who identifies her self as 'The mack' said as she popped her gum.
The others looked at Kurt expectantly and Kurt's words caught in his throat, he thought about it for a moment, if he told them what he was looking for and Quinn went back to her normal self, the glee club would know and then the whole school.
He opened and closed his mouth for a couple of seconds before a voice came from past the girls "He wants me so fuck off," Kurt looked past them and into the eyes of Blaine Anderson.
"And who says we have to do what you want?" Sheila said and Blaine just laughed at them.
"Leave. Now." Blaine said stiffly as he glared at the girls, they rolled their eyes but still made their ways past Kurt, Quinn hesitated for a moment and Kurt smiled at her, "you can talk to me when you're ready," Kurt said sincerely and Quinn nodded before moving off.
Kurt looked up and the smirking Blaine and Blaine sauntered closer to him "So we're alone," Blaine said darkly "just think about all the devious things we could get up to," Blaine smiled as he trailed his finger down from Kurt's collar to his belly button.
Kurt tried to breathe easy, he was not going to let his hormones get the better of him, Blaine took a step closer and Kurt could feel Blaine's breath tickling against his face.
"So tell me, what could you possibly want from the skanks?" Blaine whispered and Kurt let out another breath.
"ID, a fake ID," Kurt said slowly and Blaine laughed.
"Really? You?"
"Yes me, why?"
"Well," Blaine said slowly and Kurt scowled as Blaine looked at him "it's a little obvious you're a goody two shoes."
"I want it so I can buy a bottle of wine," Kurt said quickly.
"Wine?" Blaine laughed as he crossed his arms over his chest "You want wine, well I can buy you that."
"You wont know what to get."
"Tell me then," Blaine challenged.
"No I would rather get it my self thank you."
"What ever you say lover," Blaine said licking his lips a little.
"Don't call me that."
"What would you prefer?"
"Just stop okay, can you do it or not?"
"Of course I can," Blaine said and Kurt smiled "for a price that is," Blaine finished.
"How much do you want from me?"
"A kiss should suffice," Blaine smirked.
Kurt shook his head "no."
"Then no ID," Blaine said and Kurt glared at him, he bit his lip before leaning forward and pressing a peck to Blaine's cheek "There," Kurt said and Blaine let out a slight laugh before grabbing the back of Kurt's neck and crashing their lips together. Blaine backed Kurt into the wire of the fence and Kurt wrapped his arms around Blaine's neck as he pulled Blaine closer forcing Blaine to deepen the kiss. Blaine slid his tongue into Kurt's mouth and Kurt felt Blaine's piercing stroke along his tongue, a moan escaped Kurt's mouth and Blaine smiled and detached his lips.
Kurt opened his eyes and realised what he was doing and pulled his arms back to his side, he avoided eye contact with Blaine and moved to get out but Blaine's arm stopped him. Kurt looked at Blaine's arm, the leather of the jacket had slipped down revealing the skin hiding underneath, dark scars ran horizontally across Blaine's wrist.
"What are these?" Kurt asked looking at Blaine, Blaine hung his head and Kurt looked at him more intently.
"Kurt," Blaine said in a warning tone and Kurt shook his head.
"You've stolen two kisses off me, I've had your tongue in my mouth," Kurt said and Blaine laughed.
"Would you rather it somewhere else?" Blaine said with a wiggle of his eyebrows, Kurt scowled at him.
"Not now."
"You mean later?" Blaine said with a wink and Kurt shook his head.
"That is not what I meant at all, are you going to talk or not, what are they?" Kurt ordered and Blaine took a deep breath in and out.
"They are exactly what you think they are," Blaine said simply and Kurt's heart sunk, oh, god, I'm an idiot for asking, Kurt thought to himself as he looked down at the dirty cement.
"I'm sorry," Kurt said slowly and Blaine just laughed, "No you're not, no one ever is, not really anyway, you certainly don't regret asking so why be sorry,? Blaine said harshly.
"No I really am okay, I was just so, I don't know, I wanted to know but I didn't think of the emotional effect, so I am sorry," Kurt insisted and Blaine just shook his head and took a step back and threw his arms to the side.
"Ask me what you want to know, do it, I know you're itching to ask me something, I can see it in your eyes," Blaine said and Kurt's heart thumped, he was scared, he didn't know what Blaine was capable of.
"Okay then, why?"
"Come on Kurt, you can do better then that, you're a smart boy after all, expand, define what ever you want to tell me," Blaine said as he gestured wildly with his hands.
"Why did you do it, the self harming, why?" Kurt asked timidly, his fingers gripping onto the metal fence.
"There it is, that question and do you want to hear the answer I didn't like who I was," Blaine said simply.
Kurt shook his head "There is more to it then that."
"No there isn't."
"Stop dodging, you wanted me to ask what I want to know and I am, what pushed you to that point?"
"I'm gay Kurt! Okay, not like having my tongue down your throat wasn't a tell but I was hated for it, my parents had brains smaller then a mouses testicles and they hated me, they hated me because of who I am, everyone hated me, and I figured I'd discontinue it." Blaine finished in a whisper.
"Discontinue what?"
"My life, so I grabbed my Pencil sharpener broke it and pulled out the blade, obviously I didn't plan it that well my brother Cooper found me, he showed me a few of his own scars and he cleaned up my cuts, Coop wanted to be a doctor so I was like gold to him," Blaine said with a laugh.
"Coop promised he wouldn't tell, but you could just tell they knew, they all knew, doesn't take much to guess why the resident delinquent has bandages, after a while the looks and stares became to much and Cooper moved us here."
"You don't live with your parents?" Kurt asked softly.
"Did you miss the part where I said they hated me? For them it was a blessing, daddy dearest wouldn't have to waste all of his energy beating me any more," Blaine said sarcastically.
"Oh," Kurt whispered, he didn't know what else to say, what was he supposed to say? Sorry wasn't enough.
"Yeah oh, now get it over with, judge me, tell me I'm stupid, say it! I'm fucked up, I have a fucked up life!" Blaine cried and Kurt shook his head, it wasn't like he wasn't hiding some demons of his own.
"For your information I wasn't going to judge you Anderson," Kurt said rather harshly as he pushed himself off the fence.
"Really you sure cause a piece of ass like you is the exact kind of person that thinks that I'm nothing in comparison," Blaine hissed.
"Shut up! Okay just shut up!" Kurt cried, anger burning underneath his skin.
"Why do you want to start judging me? Because I don't need it from you! I get it enough from every body else!"
"You know what? If you just shut your yap for ten seconds and let me talk you would realise I think the exact opposite to what you think I think!"
"Great, just great, so the pristine beauty is going to tell me how I don't have to do this to my self, huh? Do you have a little speech?" Blaine yelled and Kurt glared at him, the volcano bursting inside of him.
"SHUT UP! You're not the only one with a fucked up life!" Kurt cried and Blaine looked at him disbelievingly.
"Oh what, did your favourite designer die?"
"No, my mother did!" Kurt yelled, his heart thumping against his chest, he couldn't stop the words from flowing from his chest to his mouth.
"I was nine and it was my fault! She was so sick and she'd had gone into a state of mania, I wasn't supposed to be near her, dad said she needed her rest but I was walking past her room and she called me in. She was anxious and she just wouldn't stop talking, so much talking and I didn't understand it and then she was coughing and mum used to give me water when that happens to me so that's what I did." Kurt pinched the bridge of his nose.
"She didn't stop talking still and she just breathed the water in, it went straight to her lungs and drowned her within a few hours, tell me again how I have a perfect life because I don't I killed my mother!" Kurt cried and Blaine looked on helplessly.
"When I was fifteen I wanted to kill myself, I was hated for being gay and I just thought that it was punishment because of what I did and I thought I'd be better off dead, I started slow, I didn't want my dad to see, so I'd just cut my leg when I was in the shower. I guess it became an addiction but one night my dad caught me, I was taken to the doctors and I've been on anti depressants ever since, so tell me Blaine Anderson, jut tell me one more fucking time how much your life sucks because if you haven't noticed you aren't the only one fucked up here!" Kurt yelled before clamping his hand over his mouth, he didn't know what he was thinking when he said all that, Blaine looked at him with a gobsmacked expression.
"I'm sorry, I've never told anyone and I was just really angry and I'm sorry," Blaine whispered.
"I never thought I would hear you apologise," Kurt said distantly.
"Don't get used to it," Blaine laughed, they stood in silence for a few moments before Kurt spoke up again "If it's any consolation you were the first person outside my dad and doctor to know."
"I liked how you told me," Blaine smirked.
"What?"
"The whole angry swearing, it was super sexy," Blaine said slowly coming closer and Kurt couldn't help the blush that fluttered across his face.
"Shut it, I'm as sexy as a baby."
"You're wrong, you are beyond sexy," Blaine said licking his lips, Kurt looked up at him.
"Anderson please stop."
"Call me Blaine, please," Blaine pleaded with a smirk and Kurt shook his head, trying to focus on being witty then the fact that he had just bared his utter soul to someone he'd met the day before.
"I will call you by your first name the moment you earn my respect," Kurt said softly, Kurt knew already that Blaine had indeed learned his respect and he was itching to say his name out loud, 'Anderson' just sounded strange.
Blaine stepped closer to Kurt, his body pressing against him, his mouth coming to Kurt's ear "I only wanted to hear you say it so I can picture you screaming it when I'm all alone in my bed tonight my hand wrapped arou-"
A bell rang in the distance and Kurt sighed "oh look the bell, we better get going Blaine-" Kurt's eyes widened as he realised what he'd done "-fuck, shit, dammit."
Blaine laughed "That was more then I asked for, I also got to hear you say a string of profanities right after my name, just remember if you ever want to let loose some time, it'll be just you, me and a hotel room," Blaine whispered as he licked the shell of Kurt's ear. Kurt would never have thought that such an act could be as sexy and amazing as it was, his knees shook a little bit and Blaine smiled as he noticed, he wrapped his arm around Kurt's waist and pulled him that little bit closer.
"Unless you don't want to wait for the hotel room, everyone is in class, they wouldn't hear us, unless you want them to," Blaine whispered huskily as he bit Kurt's ear lobe.
"I have to get to French," Kurt stuttered as his eyes closed when Blaine licked and bit along Kurt's neck.
"I hope you mean kissing but if you ask me you don't need to go to a class for that," Blaine said before slamming his lips against Kurt's for the second time that day.
Blaine detached slowly and removed himself from Kurt completely "If you're looking for a tutor to help you learn a new language I majored in body language," Blaine said with a wink before Kurt watched Blaine's retreating back.
"You would be the last person I would go to!" Kurt called after him with a small smile.
A/N: So the main dialogue in this chapter was the second thing I ever thought of for this fic, I was venting about a lot of things and I just kept writing and then it moulded into something pretty good (IMO :D) I hope you guys liked this chapter :D Even if it's really angsty :P
Love you all
Shae xo
PS This goes for all of you: if you have anything you want to talk about, anything at all, big, little, the size of mouse testicals ;) anything, I'm here, my PM inbox is always open, my tumblr ask is also always open, you can find that under fallingthroughwonderland . tumblr . com / ask I take any kinds of things, you do have someone you can turn to and believe me when I say that I understand what you're going through, I told you how I put a lot of my self into this chapter, Kurt's story loosly translates into mine, different ages, different parent. So now you know my story, perhaps you want to get yours off your chest? You are loved, remember that, it may sound silly but you're reading my story, I love you for that and I would hate to lose you.