A/N Omigod, you guys! Sorry it took a while.
This chapter is a little angsty (and also fluffy?) and leaves some stuff unanswered, but alas! There will be answers in the near future!
Disclaimer: I do not own Glee
"-not fucking listening to me! This is not some fucking joke!"
Kurt snapped awake at the sound of his roommate shouting. His eyes were fuzzy with sleep and he rubbed them with the heels of his palms hastily, trying to figure out what was happening.
"Thad, please. Just stop for a second-"
"Fuck off, Trent! Quit it!"
Kurt wiped the rest of the sleep out of his eyes and looked around frantically, only to see his room looking like it had survived some kind of natural disaster. It was hardly light out yet, and there were loose papers everywhere and Thad's side of the room was almost completely covered in clothes. His roommate suddenly stormed over to his bed where a small suitcase lay haphazardly open and started shoving miscellaneous items into it. Kurt blinked and sat up straighter, watching as two boys – Trent and Jeff, he realized – followed Thad and tried to pull the things from his hands.
"Just listen to us, Thad. You can't do this now-"
"I said fuck off, you guys!" Thad shoved Jeff squarely in the chest, and the lankier boy fell over backward and landed roughly against the desk in Thad's corner of the room, hitting the small of his back against the corner and letting out a hiss of pain. Trent approached the dark-haired boy and pushed him hard against his shoulder, pushing him down to sit on his bed, causing him to halt in his actions.
"Listen, bro. Cool the fuck off and listen to us. You're on probation already for breaking curfew last month, and ditching campus is only gonna get you that much closer to getting expelled." The dark-haired boy scoffed in response. "I'm fucking serious. Just wait 'til the weekend and have someone call in a pass-"
"That's the thing, Trent. He was the one who always called in my passes! I have to do this-"
"Then talk to the dean! Talk to the RA, or counselor, or Ms. Webber or someone! Maybe they'll understand the situation and give you a pass!" Thad simply shrugged off Trent's attempt to convince him with a shake of his head and resumed packing clothes into the suitcase. The bigger teen sighed exasperatedly and turned to face Jeff, who was leaning against the desk he had fallen into with his arms crossed. "Jeff, man. Help me out, here." The smaller boy simply shrugged in response, a look of annoyance etched onto his face.
"Forget it. He's gonna do whatever he damn well pleases... Nothing new there." The blonde boy muttered the last part and began walking towards the door when he noticed the very puzzled, wide-eyed Kurt sitting up in his bed, giving them all confused stares. Jeff shared a long look with the boy, not saying any words, and stepped through the door, closing it behind himself.
Trent eyed the path of the other boy as he made his way out the door and then, too, caught sight of Kurt and sighed. He turned back around to face Thad.
"Listen, bro. I hate doing this, but if you keep packing up to leave like this, I'm gonna go wake up the RA, or – or warn the guards, or something. We can't have you doing shit like this." And with that, the bigger teen exited the room, not pausing to hear or see any reaction from Thad.
Kurt turned to watch is roommate, who had stopped in his hasty attempt in packing and stood, facing away from him with his hands on his hips. Kurt could hear his fast, angry breathing. Thad suddenly chucked the open suitcase off his bed and it hit the wall with a loud bang! and the previously-packed belongings scattered to the ground. Kurt inhaled sharply at the sound and his roommate whipped around, eyes dark with rage and his breathing heavy and quick, fuming.
"What? Don't fucking look at me like that, Kurt!" He bellowed, taking a threatening step towards the young boy. Kurt simply stared at his roommate, a blank, confused expression on his face. Thad let out a frustrated sigh and stormed into the attached bathroom, slamming the door violently, causing the pens, and pencils, and other items sitting on the boys' desks in the room to rattle slightly.
Kurt blinked a few times and shook his head, trying to come out of the confused trance. Why was Thad trying to leave…? Kurt sighed. He'd most likely never be able to guess and he'd probably end up hearing more about it later. Kurt craned his neck to find the clock on his bedside table.
5:42 a.m.
You've got to be kidding me. The first class on Wednesday didn't start until 8:00. And even then, Kurt's first class was his required extracurricular, which ended up being track, much to his dismay, and he usually skipped out on his shower in the morning and, instead, opted to take one after his grueling physical education. This being said, he usually didn't get up until 7:00, enough time to do his skin routine and get down in time for breakfast at 7:30. There was no reason in hell that he should be up at this ungodly time of day.
He sighed and scanned the room, taking in the mess before him as he heard the shower start to run from the bathroom. He stood up, realizing he wouldn't be able to get back to sleep, and slowly began putting away his roommate's things. Kurt picked up Thad's clothes slowly and folded them neatly before placing them carefully into his drawers, hanging the uniform shirts and blazers up in the wardrobe and placing the suitcase in his closet.
He saw a crumpled, bright orange note sitting on the floor next to Thad's homework pages, the kind that came from the office, usually informing a student of a meeting set up with the dean or counselor, or a message from home. Knowing it most likely had to do with whatever had happened this morning, Kurt folded it closed and placed it on his roommate's table, beside his bed, respecting his privacy. He collected the loose sheets from the floor and tried to make sense of them and organize them somewhat, laying them in small stacks on his desk.
The bathroom door flung open and Kurt turned around to see steam emerging out of the room in waves, and Thad standing, clad in only a dark navy towel, taking in the neat room from the doorway. The dark-haired boy blinked a few times, an unreadable expression on his face, and stepped fully into the room and to his wardrobe, taking out a uniform blazer and oxford shirt. He opened the drawers to pull out a pair of slacks and Dalton-issued P.E. wear for his first class, which he shared with his roommate, but stopped when he heard the bathroom door close. Thad turned around and saw his roommate was no longer next to him.
"Thank you," he muttered, though he knew the other boy most likely couldn't hear him.
Kurt sighed as he entered the bathroom, taking in his haggard appearance in the mirror. The cuts on his face from a week and a half ago were almost completely healed, and the bruise around his mouth was a sickly yellow color, though not very noticeable. The only thing that had improved about his appearance since he'd arrived was the general quality of his skin. Since Finn had given him his things a few days ago, he'd been able to get back into his moisturizing routine.
He dragged his hands over his face and let out a shuddering breath. I might as well take a shower… I have nothing better to do for over an hour.
Just as he was reaching to grab the handle of the hot water, a loud thump! against the wall made him jump back in surprise. It was coming from the wall that connected to the dorm next to his. That's Jeff and Nick's room… He heard a voice shouting, but it didn't sound like either of the room's resident's, and then a grunt of pain and something hit the wall again. What is going on in this place…?
Kurt shook his head in annoyance and turned on the shower, stepping under the spray of hot water and sighing as some of his tension eased. He suddenly came to a realization that he was at a reform school. Of course weird things could be going on. And of course there would be guys yelling, and throwing stuff, and having drama at 6 in the morning. As much as Kurt liked to pretend Dalton was some kind of fancy prep academy, with its hallowed halls and leather-chaired common rooms, it was really a teenage correctional school. The guys here were here for bad reasons. They were here because they had done something wrong, something illegal. And as much as Kurt liked to play along with his friends' childish antics and live in their little bubble of false innocence, the truth was, everyone here, himself included, were bad guys who did bad things.
"Holy shit! Nick!"
Kurt jumped again, dropping his bottle of shampoo when he heard the familiar voice shouting from the room next to him. There was no mistaking the vocal quality of his blonde, lanky friend, one of the voices he woke up to this morning screaming and arguing. Now something apparently was happening next door as well. Kurt sighed and picked up his shampoo bottle from the shower floor. Maybe he'd survive this place…
Thad, Kurt, Trent and David made their way to the Arts Building after track, deciding to spend their hour block of free time with their friends.
"I just don't understand. I made it specifically clear that I wanted the auto-shop class. And they said 'okay.'" Kurt slid down the wall and took a seat next to Wes. "Doesn't 'okay' usually mean… okay?"
"Maybe they thought you were kidding," David suggested, rubbing his hands up and down his arms in an attempt to get warm. "I mean, honestly, Kurt, if you told me you wanted to fix cars and build engines, I'd think you were kidding."
"Yeah," Trent agreed, and Kurt narrowed his eyes at them.
"Still. They give me the class I don't want, and now they're surprised when I don't do the stuff they want me to do. I mean, who in their right mind likes running around in this weather?" He gestured wildly around himself. "It's freezing today! So much for our Indian summer…"
"'Indian summer'?" Blaine looked at Kurt with a quirked eyebrow as he offered his lighter to David. "It's been raining for two weeks straight. How is that an Indian summer? You should be thankful it wasn't raining today." Kurt huffed and wrapped his arms around his body.
"Maybe. But it was still unseasonably warm while it was raining. Now it's just clear and freezing. It feels like it's gonna start snowing soon." Kurt looked up to the sky, glaring at it, as though it would reveal all of its upcoming weather secrets. Next to him, Wes scoffed and bumped shoulders with him to get his attention.
"It's late October and we're in Ohio. It'd be weird if it didn't start snowing soon." Kurt shrugged in response and a silence fell over the boys.
A few moments later, Nick came walking up to the wall and leaned against it, looking tired. Kurt's eyes widened as he saw the boy's left eye was swollen and bruised. He glanced around the group, trying to determine if anyone else had seen it, and they were all staring at the boy with pitiful, upset looks. Eventually, they all turned their attention away from the dark-haired boy, none of them saying a word about his black eye. Kurt squirmed, uncomfortable, and looked down to his hands, trying to figure out what was going on. He gave one last look at the group of boys and saw Jeff watching Nick out of the corner of his eye as he took a hit from his cigarette, a hurt, pained expression etched on his face. Nick didn't seem to notice as he stood and stared off into the vacant field ahead of them.
"Like this?" Jeff looked up to his lab partner to see him staring off at a place next to Jeff's head. He held the beaker up and waved it in front of the pale boy's face. Kurt stared longingly at the curly-haired boy across the room, fumbling with his chemicals as he poured them into his beaker. Even from this distance, Kurt could tell they were incorrectly measured. A low chuckle resonated from Blaine's throat and Kurt felt that familiar twitch run through his body. His dick jerked and stiffened slightly, his cheeks flushing with color. "Kuu-urt," his lab partner said in a singsong voice, snapping Kurt out of his haze. The boy looked at Jeff with a raised eyebrow expectantly, and crossed his legs in front of him, attempting to hide his obvious arousal. "I said 'like this?'" He presented the beaker to his partner, the thermometer attached to the side. Kurt blinked at it a few times, trying to remember what they were doing. He shook his head slowly.
"No…" He drew out the word, taking it from the blonde boy's hands. "No, see, the thermometer can't touch the bottom, or else it's going to read wrong." While he was adjusting it, Jeff peeked around his shoulder to see what Kurt had been staring at. Blaine and David were stationed at the lab next to theirs, laughing as their beaker's contents were overflowing and spilling onto the table. Jeff smirked knowingly. Before he could say anything, Kurt let out a frustrated grumble and ran his hands through his hair that was falling into his eyes.
"My bangs are just getting much too long. I need to trim them. Well, really, I needed to trim them about a month ago, but you can't have scissors in jail." He scoffed, pouring the prepared mixture into the beaker and placing it on the hotplate. Jeff's eyebrows shot up in surprise.
"You cut your own hair?" Kurt nodded slowly, eyeing the boy in front of him, as though it were obvious. Jeff perked up. "Do you – can you cut other people's hair? Can you cut my hair?" Kurt raised an eyebrow questioningly.
"You want me to cut your hair…? I mean – I can do it, I know how. I'm just surprised. I thought you had the whole fringe over the eyes thing happening on purpose."
"Oh! No – yeah. I do! I mean – I want to keep that… The f-fringe thing, or whatever. I just want to cut the back a little. It tickles my neck." Kurt chuckled, amused again at how these kids could so easily switch between sounding like five year olds to imprisoned criminals. This time, it being the former.
"No, of course. Absolutely. I understand… Just…come by after the last class today."
"…This is the last class today, Kurt."
"Oh! Well then, in that case, we're gonna need some scissors... Can you snatch the ones over by the teacher's desk?" Jeff scoffed and rolled his eyes.
"The fact that you even ask insults me."
Snip! snip!
"There. What do you think?"
"Wow… How'd you do the back without looking like that?" Jeff stared in awe at the pale boy's head, his eyes raking over the expertly trimmed layers and detail.
"I've just done it so many times to myself that I can sort of feel where to cut... Anyway, let's get you started! Sit down." Jeff sat down on the chair Kurt had placed in front of the mirror that hung on the inside of his wardrobe door. Kurt draped a towel around the blonde boy's shoulders and took a few moments inspecting his hair with a critical eye. "So you just want a trim? Like, say, a half an inch taken off from the bottom?" Jeff blinked a few times, slightly confused, then reached his hand to feel the hair by his neck. He nodded slowly.
"Uh, yeah. Sure. Just from the back, though."
"Right. Well, take your necklace off." Jeff shot Kurt a narrow-eyed glare while he unclasped the chain around his neck.
"It's a dog tag," he mumbled irritably, dropping said chain onto the floor beside his chair. Kurt blinked in response and began combing through the boy's hair.
"I'm sure it is. Now, hold still, unless you want this all uneven." A few moments of silence passed as Kurt trimmed the boy's hair, until Kurt spoke up again. "Jeff… What happened to Nick this morning…? To his eye..." The blonde boy sighed.
"…He, um… He owes this guy money… And to be entirely honest, I'm not even sure what it's for this time, but what I do know… is that he doesn't have it." Kurt nodded thoughtfully, taking all the information in.
"Is that – did the thing with Thad have to do with that, too?" Kurt watched as Jeff furrowed his eyebrows in thought and pursed his lips slightly. He let out another sigh.
"…No." He looked at Kurt through the mirror to see his face. "But that's really not my thing to tell. If Thad wants you to know, he'll tell you."
"But it's perfectly fine telling Nick's private business," Kurt countered, a slight attitude to his voice. Jeff's eyes widened and he had to resist whipping his head around to face the other boy.
"No, no, no. See – first of all, me and Nick are, like, best friends. We've known each other since we were, like, seven. And second, the thing going on with Nick, that's not a secret. You could ask anyone – everyone knows that shit. But the whole thing with Thad… It's kind of private. I'm not sure he wants too many people to know. You know how he can be kind of private about stuff…" Kurt considered all this for a second, then nodded.
"Yeah, I suppose. Blaine can kind of be like that, too…" He trailed off for a moment and then spoke with a lighter tone. "I didn't know you and Nick were friends before you got sent here." Jeff raised an eyebrow curiously, noticing the obvious diversion away from his mention of Blaine.
"Um, yeah… We got sent in here together for jacking a car… Wait, what do you mean about Blaine, though?" Kurt spun Jeff's chair around to look at the front of his hair.
"Do you want me to shape up the front? It's kind of shaggy-looking... It won't even look shorter." The blonde boy nodded in response. "…Well, just that he can be all secretive around me. Or standoffish, I guess…" He titled his head sideways in thought as he very carefully took a small snip off of the hair in front of him. "But, only sometimes. I mean, sometimes, he's, like, really open and talks to me about his day, or whatever. And then sometimes, he acts like I'm not his friend and that I'm just following him around, asking him questions and bothering him. It's weird…" Kurt brushed some snippets of hair from the Jeff's cheek. "But I guess that's just the drugs, or whatever. Like, mood swings, right? I don't know. It's confusing. Especially considering…" He trailed off and shrugged, stripping the towel from the blonde boy. "Well, voila! What do you think?"
Jeff looked into the mirror at his freshly cut hair and smiled. "Wow. Cool, Kurt. It actually looks really good. Thanks. I can see what you mean, now, about the front looking shaggy before…" Kurt giggled and dusted off the boy's back where some hair had fallen, regardless of the towel. "Um… What were you saying before, though? Considering what, exactly?" Kurt's smile fell and he sat down on his bed gingerly. He watched as the other boy took a seat across from him on Thad's bed.
"Well… I guess it's probably pretty obvious, anyway. And there's no use trying to hide it because nothing's going to come from it…" Jeff gave him a nod, urging him to continue. "But you can't tell him. You can absolutely never tell him about this." Jeff nodded again, gesturing with his hand for him to continue. "I…think…I might possibly…have feelings…for Blaine." The blonde boy in front of him smirked. "Don't give me that look! I just… Something about him… I can't figure it out. He really confuses me with his behavior, and yet I find myself not being able to…resist him!" He let out a groan. "I'm so pathetically helpless!"
"…Kurt…" Jeff looked at the boy with a serious expression. "I'm going to be honest with you. When it comes to stuff like this, like relationship stuff… Blaine is generally bad news." Kurt covered his face with his hands and let out a small muffled groan. "But – but I'm not saying he's like that all the time! It's just what I've seen before. I've never really seen him in a real…relationship, I don't think. Not that he couldn't be in one…" Kurt removed his hands from his face and stared at the other boy as he spoke. Jeff blinked thoughtfully a few times before continuing. "Blaine… He kind of treats sex and guys a certain way, and I'm not sure you want to get mixed up in that," he shrugged. "But I could be wrong... I'm just giving you a heads up." Kurt nodded, a pained, thoughtful expression on his face. He sighed.
"Well… Thanks for the…advice, Jeff…"
"No problem... Thanks for the haircut!"
"Okay… 13th."
"…Oh! The – the duck one!"
"…The du – what…?"
"You know! The duck one… Lame Duck!" Nick laughed and shook his head at the Asian boy.
"Nooo, Wes. No, not even close. That's the 20th amendment. This one's the one that has to do with the abolishment of slavery." He laughed, watching the disappointment on Wes's face turn to anger. The Asian boy let out a frustrated sigh and buried his head in the pillow on the floor.
"Screw this. I'm gonna fail so fucking hard. I hate this shit." David eyed the boy from where he was sitting in one of the leather couches, texting on his phone.
"Don't be such a little bitch, Wes. We're all gonna fail and we've accepted that. Just embrace your defeat and get over it." Wes's head snapped up from the pillow and eyed the curly-haired boy across from him, sitting on a pillow with his Government textbook open in his lap in front of him.
"Except Blaine. Blaine's not going to fail. He's gonna get a fucking A like a little bitch." He let out a huff and collapsed back into the pillow. Blaine glanced up from his reading with a cocked eyebrow.
"Uh... I wouldn't be so sure about that. I'm really bad at memorizing things like this." Trent sighed and stood up from one of the leather chairs.
"Fuck this. I'm totally done with this crap. We've been here for, like, two hours and all we've done is argue over the pronunciation of that one guy's name, and figure out the most creative way to kill ourselves with the textbook. I'm going to bed." Most of the guys made noises of agreement and stood to follow his lead. Blaine noticed Kurt putting his textbook into his bag.
"Kurt!" The young boy turned around and raised his eyebrows in acknowledgement. "Do…you wanna, maybe, come to my room to study a little bit more before we go to sleep? My roommate has a counseling session until curfew, so it would just be us." The pale boy flushed a bright crimson and Blaine smiled sincerely, looking over Kurt's blushing cheeks with a fond, honest smile. Jeff locked eyes with Kurt as the blonde boy was leaving the common room and gave him a knowing look. Kurt turned back to Blaine.
"Um… I'm actually pretty tired, Blaine. And I got most of this stuff down, anyway. Thanks, though." Blaine furrowed his eyebrows together before his face shifted into an indifferent expression and he scoffed, shrugging one shoulder lightly.
"Whatever, then. See you tomorrow." The curly-haired boy flung his bag over his shoulder and stalked away, obvious attitude in his stride. Once the boy was completely out of the room and out of earshot, Kurt let out an angry grunt. He snatched his bag from the floor and took long, livid strides towards the second exit of the room, leading to the outside of the building. There was no way he was going to face anyone right now.
Who does he think he is? He acts like a little flirt all the time and then becomes an asshole when I tell him no, or when he all of a sudden feels like it. Is it even the drugs making him moody? Or is it just him trying to be a player and getting bitter when he's shot down?
Kurt stomped outside into the cool air, taken by surprise at just how chilly the night was. He kept his head down and forced his way through the cold weather, pulling his blazer tighter around himself.
If what Jeff says is true, then why am I even bothering with him at all? I let myself drift off and daydream about him, and think about all the little things about him that fascinate me, but I know that he's really just trying to get with me. Then… why does sometimes he sound so incredibly sweet and caring…?
Kurt let out another aggravated noise, sitting down firmly on a bench that lined the sidewalk between the dorm building and the Science wing. He rummaged through his bag and yanked out his phone, checking the time. He still had 22 minutes before curfew, and he was planning on using all of those precious minutes to cool off before heading back to a place where he had to interact with people. Kurt let his eyes flutter shut and tried to focus on controlling his heavy breathing.
I've gotten my heart broken every time I've let myself be vulnerable and put myself out there. That is not happening again. No, definitely not. I'm not going to let myself fall for another guy who is just going to stomp on my heart. Another guy who will rise up my spirits with the idea and feelings of being in love, only to have them come crashing down in a disastrous fall. No. I'm not letting him use me. That's all he's doing, trying to use me, and it's not going to work.
"Oh, shoot. I think I left my jacket in the fitting room." Kurt stopped in his tracks and sighed. He turned to the girls standing next to him. "I'm gonna go back and see if it's still there."
"Do you want us to come with you?" Tina asked him, turning to face the pale boy. Yes! Yes, come with me! Don't let me leave alone!
"No, don't worry about it. It's late, anyway. I drove here by myself, so it's fine. I'll see you girls Monday!" He kissed both Tina and Mercedes on the cheek and turned on his heel, heading back in the direction of the small boutique they had just left. A loud club was blasting music as he approached it, and he barely heard the man calling after him.
"Wait up, faggot."
Kurt spun around sharply, seeing four men looming over him, the one leading the group, a man with greasy-looking tan skin and dull, black hair.
He knew what was coming next. He always knew what happened next. He knew this was just a dream, a nightmare, but he was never able to wake up.
A swift punch to the nose and he was being dragged into the alley next to the club with the booming music.
No! Stop! Don't do it! P-please don't rape me! He was yelling, but no one heard him, not even the men. It was just him yelling in his third-person dream perspective. He saw himself as though he was watching a movie unfold, being held down by the men as the others beat him. He saw himself, but he couldn't do anything to help. He knew what was coming, he'd replayed it in his mind a thousand times, but his foolish earlier self didn't, and he didn't fight hard enough.
Stop! Stop! Just stop! Get away!
"Kurt!"
Who was calling his name? Was it Mercedes? Or Tina? Was someone coming back for him? To save him from his hellish repetition of this nightmare?
Help me! Oh God, please!
"Kurt, wake up!"
Kurt's eyes shot open, and he instantly squeezed them closed again, cringing at the burn of the tears in his eyes. He sobbed violently, his back heaving and shaking fiercely with each breath. He noticed the warmth around him coming into focus and realized a pair of arms was wrapped tightly around his waist, forcibly trying to hold the boy still and control his shaking.
"Shh, it's okay, baby. Come on, it's okay. You're awake." Kurt knew that voice. He blearily forced his eyes open and his vision was filled with a scruffy jaw and chin. Soft lips were pressed against his temple for a quick second, and the arms that were around him ran up and down his sides hastily. "Shh, shh. It's okay, it's okay." The voice sounded more frantic than comforting, like he was trying to calm Kurt down, but he had no idea how. His blurry vision filled with dark, messy curls as the boy holding him rested his head on Kurt's shoulder and sighed shakily as the young boy's sobs began to subside. "Good, good. Come on, now, that's better. Shh." Blaine lifted his head from Kurt's shoulder and pulled away enough to get a good look at him. He searched the small boy's face with a pained expression and tilted his head to the side. He ran his hands up and down Kurt's back. "There. Now, come on, baby. Look at me… You okay?"
"W-why are you c-calling me that?" Kurt stuttered out brokenly through his remaining sobs.
"…What?"
"You k-keep calling me – calling me baby." The hands running up and down his back stopped movement immediately. Blaine pulled his hands away and dropped them to his side. Kurt looked down, only now realizing the position they were in. Kurt was partially sitting up against his pillows, on top of his covers, and Blaine was kneeling in front of him, his knees on either side of one of Kurt's thighs, his body pressed against the other boy's.
"I – sorry. I didn't realize I was – I was just trying to – to calm you down… You were screaming in here..." Blaine removed himself from in front of Kurt and sat beside him, tentatively wrapping an arm around the young boy's shoulders. When he didn't pull away, he pulled him in closer and placed his other hand on Kurt's thigh. "Are you okay?"
Kurt eyed the hand placed on his knee with a flushed face and shifted his gaze to the curly-haired boy's face, who was looking at him with a concerned, expectant look. Kurt opened his mouth to reply, but suddenly stopped. He looked at the hand on his knee again and the arm around his shoulders, thinking about what Jeff said about Blaine. Kurt's face morphed into a scowl and yanked away from the other boy, rising to his feet next to his bed.
"I'm fine, Blaine. You don't have to run in here and use my nightmares as some excuse to feel me up! I've hardly been able to sleep as it is since I got here, and then you come in here and shake me awake from my nap." The other boy stared at him, his mouth open in shock, an incredulous expression on his face.
"Kurt… You were screaming bloody murder in here! Everyone's down in the common room studying and I – I came back up here to grab my French book! You – I heard you in here, so I came in to see if you were okay… I wasn't feeling you up!" He sat back against the pillows of Kurt's bed and crossed his arms over his chest, an angry expression taking over his features. "And don't bitch about me waking you up. I'm sure you'd rather be awake than still having that nightmare." Kurt opened his mouth as though to argue, but closed his mouth and sighed.
"Just…go, Blaine." The curly-haired let a quick hurt look flash across his face before moving to the edge of the bed. He swung his legs over the side and faced Kurt from his position on the bed.
"What's up with you, Kurt? I – I like you, and I was starting to hope me and you could… I don't know, spend more time together... And I thought you liked me, and you've been acting all pissy around me the past few days. Did I do something to tick you off?" Kurt's irritated expression shifted to one of hurt. He turned around to face away from Blaine and let out a pained whine.
"…D-don't tell me you like me, Blaine... I can't let myself… do this, with you. I don't think I can handle it…" Blaine leapt to his feet and came around to approach Kurt's front. The young boy took a step back towards the bed and curled his arms around himself.
"Handle what…? Kurt, I… I want to be with you…" The pale boy shook his head, overwhelmed, as tears started pooling in his eyes. "Yes, Kurt. I do. I really do... Let me…" He stepped closer to Kurt, watching his eyes the entire time he did so, and the small boy didn't move away. Kurt's breath hitched in his throat and he couldn't tear his eyes away from the warm pools of hazel that were presented before him. I'm not gonna let this happen. I'm just gonna have my heart broken again… And yet he found himself not pulling away as Blaine wrapped one arm tightly around the his waist and pushed them both back until the back of Kurt's legs hit his bed, causing him to gasp lightly and hold onto Blaine's neck with both of his arms. Blaine slowly lowered him down, his other arm bracing them as they became horizontal.
Blaine set Kurt down entirely and lay gently on top of him, his legs on either side of one of the small boy's thigh, strangely similar to their position earlier. Blaine continued to hold Kurt's glasz eyes with his own, searching his face for anything that would tell him to stop. When he found nothing, he brought both of his hands to grip the boy's slim waist, pulling their hips flush against each other.
Without warning, he lunged down at captured the boy's lips with his own, causing the boy beneath him to inhale a sharp breath, taking a second before responding to the kiss. After getting over the initial shock, Kurt closed his eyes and began moving his lips against the other boy's slowly, bringing one hand up to tangle in the Blaine's curls and the other to grip his neck. Everything about it felt so right, like he was meant to be in this very position, beneath this very boy… Blaine's lips were shockingly gentle, in comparison to his rough hold on Kurt's waist and rugged attitude.
Blaine let out a low moan from the back of his throat and Kurt couldn't help the shudder that ran through his body at the sound. Kurt pulled away from the kiss, panting slightly from lack of oxygen and turned his face to the side, his eyes clamped shut. Blaine took this opportunity to kiss his way down Kurt's jaw and neck, stopping only to bite lightly against the boy's pale skin. As the boy started grinding his hips against Kurt's, the young boy pushed lightly against Blaine's chest, pulling away from his lips, suddenly thinking back to what Jeff had told him.
"Blaine," he breathed. The other boy hummed in response, resuming his devouring in the young boy's skin. "Blaine," he repeated, with more force, pushing again on the other boy's chest, forcing his lips away from his collarbone. Blaine pulled away and propped himself up on his arms, hovering over the small boy and looking down at him with concern, his lips swollen from kissing.
"W-what? What's wrong?" He asked, quiet and breathless.
"I – I just – I mean – what is this?" Kurt replied, his eyes wide and frightened-looking. Blaine looked utterly confused. He cocked an eyebrow and searched the young boy's face for some kind of explanation.
"What…? What is what?" Kurt sighed and scooted from underneath the curly-haired boy and sat up. Blaine furrowed his eyebrows and sat up as well, watching the young boy in front of him.
"…What is this?" Kurt gestured the space between them. "I don't usually just kiss guys, Blaine. What is this…?" Blaine looked even more confused. He stared at Kurt, trying to make some kind of sense of what the boy had just said.
He didn't want to kiss him? He didn't usually kiss guys…? He didn't mean…? Was Kurt one of the guys who made a no-kissing rule and just slept with people? But… Did Kurt just want to hook up with him?
"I – you don't – do you not want to kiss? I can – I mean – we can just…you know…if that's what you want," Blaine stuttered, watching the young boy for his reaction. Kurt opened his mouth, ready to respond, but then hesitated. He looked confused and scrunched his face up in puzzlement.
"…What…?"
"…You know, like just have sex, or whatever. If you just want to do that, right away, we don't have to kiss..." The young boy's mouth fell open in shock, his eyes showing the obvious hurt.
"…What?" Blaine's face twisted back into a confused expression and he ran a hand through his curls.
"Um, well, I know some guys don't like to kiss when they hook up-"
"H-hook up – was that – is that all this was to you?" Kurt was horrified. He knew it. He knew it. And he still let himself fall into the trap that was Blaine Anderson. He could only blame himself for this.
"What? No! Kurt, I-"
"Get out!"
"…Kurt-"
"Get out!" Blaine stood up and stumbled over to the door and Kurt followed him, shoving him out and slamming it closed behind him. The curly-haired boy stood, staring at the wall in front of him, completely stunned. Now Blaine was really confused… Wasn't it Kurt who had said he didn't want to kiss…? Is that not what he meant by that…? Blaine sighed. He really messed up.
The door Wes and David's room flung open on the Saturday morning at 7:30 a.m. Wes opened his eyes and squinted at the door, still mostly asleep, to see a curly-haired boy standing in the doorway with a pout. He was about to ask him what he was doing there, but said boy sulked over to David's bed and collapsed onto it, face-first, toppling sideways across the dark-skinned boy's legs and letting out a muffled moan. David shot up, awake, and stared down at the boy lying across him.
"Good morning, sunshine…" David greeted him in a monotone voice, his expression flat. "Any particular reason why you're sprawled out in my bed, instead of yours?"
"Or better yet," Wes added, sitting up and facing Blaine with an annoyed appearance. "Why you're in here moaning to us, instead of waking up your own roommate?" They received a muffled, incoherent noise in response. "Words, Blaine. Use your words." Blaine held up his hand and flipped his middle finger at the Asian boy's condescending tone. He rolled over onto his back and exposed his face, twisted up in confusion and hurt.
"I said, you know Justin hates me… Oh, you guys," he whined, staring at the two boys with a wounded expression. "Ifucked up with Kurt real bad," he then proceeded to bring his hands up to cover his face, letting out another low moan. The boys in the room shared a quick glance and Wes shrugged. David pulled Blaine's hands from his face gently.
"Uh… What happened, B?" David began uncertainly. It seems as though this was all it took for Blaine to shoot up into a sitting position, his face morphing into a look of frustration.
"He was all… Ugh! And we were there – and – and he was, like, blah, blah, blah, don't wake me up!" Blaine spoke in a high voice, appearing to be attempting to mock Kurt. Both Wes and David's eyes widened, watching their friend crumble into a hysteric, twelve year old girlish, mess. "And then, I was all 'I like you'! And he was like – well he didn't say anything, but he was, like, whatever, and cool with it! And then we kissed!" He turned to face David and then Wes, as though challenging them to deny it. "Oh yeah, it happened! But then he was, like, blah, blah, blah, stop kissing! And then – then… then…" He dropped his face back into the bed and moaned, like he had done when he first arrived. He brought his head back up and rested his chin on his arms folded in front of him, his expression deadpan. "Then I said stupid things… And for stupid reasons!" He whined and squeezed his eyes shut. David shared a stunned look with Wes, both of them shrugging, unsure of how to proceed. Wes cleared his throat briefly.
"O-okay… Um, Blaine… Maybe you should try talking to him… That usually works, right?" Blaine let out a scoff.
"I guess. But what if he doesn't want to-"
"Well!" David cut in, clapping his hands together. "As much as I've loved this little boy talk-bonding time, and your cute little story, Blaine, we still have almost an hour before breakfast today, and then we have group, so I'd like to sleep. So…goodnight." He yanked the covers up over his shoulders and shoved Blaine off the bed with his foot. The curly-haired boy scrambled to stay on his feet and glared at the dark-skinned boy, then glanced over to where Wes was already laying back down in bed, his eyes shut.
"Fine... Why do I even keep coming to you guys for relationship advice? I think this is the last time I'm making that mistake…" At this, both boys shot back up into sitting positions and whooped.
"Oh fuck, yes! He's finally learned!"
"Oh Lord, how we have prayed!"
"Alright… Mr. Anderson? Is there anything you'd like to share with the group today?" Blaine sat up at the call of his name and glanced over to Kurt, who was idly picking at his fingernails, not paying attention to those around him. Blaine blinked a few times, and opened his mouth to respond, but hesitated. He looked back to Ms. Webber who was giving him an expectant look and then back to the pale boy, who now raised his eyes to look at Blaine, as the class had grown silent.
"I – yes… Yes, I wanted… to…" He spoke slowly, trailing off, not drawing his eyes away from Kurt. The young boy now placed his hands down in his lap and folded them together, raising an eyebrow in curiosity as the curly-haired boy stared at him blankly. "I wanted to… apologize. To Kurt." Everyone in the room seemed to be watching intently. Kurt narrowed his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest, leaning back slightly in his chair and tilting his head in a way that suggested 'go on.' Blaine swallowed audibly, nodding. "I… I'm sorry. For being a jerk last night… And for, I guess, like…upsetting you. And for the…misunderstanding…?" Blaine spoke slowly and uncertainly, giving the smaller boy a pleading look.
"Kurt?" The young boy glanced over to where his teacher had prompted him to reply. He sighed and readjusted his position, shifting slightly, with a contemplative look on his face. He turned to face Blaine with an unreadable expression.
"O-okay. I guess…" Blaine cocked an eyebrow.
"…Do you… accept my apology?" Kurt sighed heavily and stared at the floor in front of him, biting the inside of his cheek. He blinked a few times thoughtfully and turned back to face the other boy.
"I – you…made me feel like shit, Blaine. And I guess it was my fault, because I was warned about the kind of person you are... I understand what you want, but I'm not interested... And…I…accept the fact that you're sorry. But I don't forgive you." Blaine looked at him for a moment, his eyebrows furrowed together, blinking in confusion.
"Kurt. Please. Explain to me what you're talking about… Because I'm just, so confused at this point." Kurt's expression morphed slightly into one of irritation.
"Listen, Blaine. I get that you like to just hook up with guys, or whatever, but I'm really not looking for that kind of thing-"
"No! No, Kurt, I'm not, either! I mean, sometimes I am, but – but not now. I like you… I just, I thought that's what you wanted, so I was going with it…" Kurt stared at him, his face showing his mix of hurt and frustration.
"So, if that's what you thought, then why didn't you-? If you really like me, then why would you be okay with just hooking up with me?" Blaine looked panicky and then completely defeated.
"I… I don't know… I just wanted to be with you in some way, even if it was just sex! And – and that's basically all I know! That's usually the only way I'm with guys at all and-" He was cut off with a loud groan from Kurt.
"Why do you just have sex with guys, Blaine? Why can't you just be-?"
"What? Normal? I don't know how! It's the only way I've ever done it! I'm scared as shit to let someone else that close to me! Why do you think I…? Why do you think I continue with my 'problem.'? I don't just do it because I'm fucked up! I do it to get away from myself! I am so insanely freaked out by myself that I couldn't even imagine dragging someone else into my life!" He belted, temporarily forgetting the other people in the room, staring directly into a pair of intense glasz eyes.
Kurt searched the other boy's face, red from screaming, watching the series of emotions flickering over his face. His problem… Heroin. He did heroin to get away from himself, to get himself out of his own mind… Kurt nodded slowly, keeping his gaze locked on Blaine's the entire time he did so.
"Okay," he nodded again, his voice gentle, soothing. "Okay… I get it, I do… But just because you have problems within yourself doesn't mean that when you take them out on other people, it'll sting any less." Blaine's face fell slightly at his words. "You still…hurt me, Blaine. And I'm telling you right now, it might take a little while for that to heal."
A/N Sort of ehh ending, but there's a lot more to come that will bring closure to all this! Next chapter will be up soon!