A/N Jeez, sorry for the wait. I had a "surprise family gathering", which basically equates to people showing up unannounced and me being unprepared
Anywho! Here you are! This one's long at least, so think of it as my apology?
Disclaimer: I do not own Glee
"Blaine, I…thought about what you said… And I understand that you have a…confusing relationship with sex, and that you've really never done anything but hook up with guys before… But, if you really like me like you say you do, then I'm willing to help you through that and possibly start a relationship with you..." Kurt stared blankly at the boy in front of him, waiting for some kind of reaction or response, but got none. His face morphed into an expression of annoyance. "Well?"
Trent snorted from where he was casually lounging on Kurt's bed and glanced up from the phone he held in front of him. "Dude, you sound like a bad TV show, or something... Seriously, bro, how many times have you practiced saying that?" Kurt's face fell and he let out a high-pitch whine, his eyes falling shut.
"What should I say, then?" He opened his eyes to face the bigger teen. Trent placed the phone down on his lap and looked thoughtful for a moment before responding.
"Just be like 'I don't care that you used to fuck a bunch of other guys, but I wanna do more than just fuck…'" Trent shrugged, shifting his attention back down to the phone. "I mean, whatever. Blaine's never really done anything but screw guys before, but I don't think anyone's ever tried to do anything but screw him, either," he glanced back up to Kurt. "You know?" Kurt nodded slowly, then sat down on the edge of his bed, deep in thought. "Dude, why do you have a bunch of pictures with a hot, blonde chick all over you?" Kurt's head snapped up to look at Trent, seeing it was his phone he had been playing with the entire time. He leaned over to snatch the device from him, but the bigger teen held it out of his reach.
"What are you – why do you have my phone?" Kurt narrowed his eyes suspiciously and raised an eyebrow.
"Because," he held the phone away as the young boy tried to claim it again. "You were bitching about Blaine and I got bored and – okay, what the hell?" Trent turned the phone so Kurt could see the screen. It was a picture of Kurt being hugged by all the girls from Glee, before a competition at one of their 'girl's' nights. When the young boy gave no reaction, Trent turned it back to look at the picture again himself. "Man, I would fuck all of these girls. And judging by some of the other pictures on here, of you and that taller blonde one? She was totally offering… And you're gay! Why is it always like that…?"
Kurt finally ripped his iPhone from the other boy's hands and pocketed it, trying to force out memories of his girlfriends. It was just too painful. "Well, I'm going to talk to Blaine now. Are you planning to continue lying in my bed and doing nothing?" Kurt questioned the other boy with his arms crossed over his chest. Trent sighed and swung his legs over the side of the bed and brought himself to a standing position.
"Nope. I'm gonna go next door and see what Jeff and Nick are up to... Later, bro!" Kurt waved lazily as the other boy made his way out of his room and to the one next to it. He sighed and squeezed his eyes shut, anticipating the conversation he was about to have.
He really took what Blaine had said at group the day before to heart, and understood the fact that he was afraid of being in a relationship, and had never been in one before. Kurt just wanted him to know that he was sorry for overreacting and that if Blaine was willing to try to be in some kind of normal relationship, he would be there for him. He would try, too.
Kurt left his room and walked a few places down to the familiar door, and stopped in front of it when he noticed it was open a crack. He heard movement coming from inside and assumed the curly-haired boy was probably in there at that very moment, and that he was really going to have to have this uncomfortable conversation. He had no problem apologizing, but this subject was just obviously touchy, and he had to be careful to approach it the right way.
He pushed the door open slightly and saw Blaine sitting on his bed, facing away from him, hunched over. Kurt was about to greet the boy when Blaine suddenly tensed up and yanked a small green band from his left arm. Kurt narrowed his eyes and took a subconscious step back, but remained watching from the doorway, stunned. Blaine let out a shuddering sigh and let his head fall back, his body visibly relaxing.
Kurt knocked a couple times quietly on the open door and Blaine jumped violently, snapping his head around and sighing in tremendous relief and letting his eyes flutter shut when he saw the familiar pale boy standing in the doorway. Kurt noticed immediately how his face was flushed and his forehead shiny with sweat. Blaine opened his eyes and stared at Kurt with droopy, tired eyes.
"Kurt, you scared the shit out of me. What are you, um – what are you doing here?" The boy stood up from bed and Kurt noticed him place a small syringe on his bedside table with lazy hands. He hastily tugged his left shirt sleeve down, turning to face the pale boy with a curious look. Kurt couldn't tear his eyes away from the rumpled tan shirt sleeve with the tiny dot of red blood seeping through the material, near the crook of Blaine's elbow. The curly-haired boy seemed to notice this, as he folded his arms across his chest and furrowed his eyebrows, cocking his pierced one, giving Kurt an expectant look, though his eyes seemed foggy.
"…I… I just came by to say…" Kurt shook his head, trying to get himself out of his distracted haze. He focused on the hazel eyes in front of him, noting their distant quality. "I was going to say that I – I understand your, um, feelings, about yourself…and that you don't really know how to be in a real relationship…" Blaine blinked a few times, silently urging him to continue. Kurt sighed. "And I was gonna say that if you were willing to try to – to work on that – with me… I'd be willing, too, and-"
"Oh God, Kurt. I'm so glad! I've never been anyone's boyfriend before – not really – and it might take a little while, but I'll try my best to-"
"Stop! Blaine, please..." Kurt stared at the curly-haired boy as he cut him off from his ramble. He really stared at him, taking in his constricted pupils, sweaty face and messier-than-usual curls, his scuff that he seemed to have neglected shaving for longer than he usually did, and the absence of life in his eyes that seemed to be disappearing more and more frequently these days.
Perhaps he had never looked closely enough, or maybe he had, but he pretended not to see it. It could have to do with the fact that Blaine's lifestyle of casual sex and overall attitude had seemed like the most important things that stood in the way of them being together, and he never imagined he'd actually get this far, never approved of himself getting this far, and never thought things out.
Whatever the reason was, as he stood in the doorway of Blaine's room, gazing intently at the curly-haired boy in front of him, looking at his disheveled appearance and inattentive presence, it dawned on Kurt just how big of a problem this addiction was.
"I – I was going to say those things, but Blaine," he shook his head, curling his arms around himself. "I can't. I can't talk to you when you're like this." Blaine furrowed his eyebrows, eyes clearing up slightly and trying to focusing at his words.
"Can't…? Like what?" Kurt gestured wildly up and down Blaine's figure.
"This! You're all – all strung out, Blaine! You're strung out on heroin!" The curly-haired boy glanced around nervously and then yanked Kurt fully into the room and shut the door, holding a finger up to his lips, making a shushing sound. "Sorry… But, Blaine, really! You're high right now!" The other boy sighed and ran a hand through his curls, then threw his arms up in the air.
"What do you want me to say, Kurt? I'm normal when I'm like this. I shoot up to be normal. I'm high all the time… If I wasn't high you wouldn't be able to talk to me! I'd be all jittery and stuff, and – and-"
"No! Stop, Blaine. I can't – I can't do this!" Kurt shook his head rapidly, willing the tears in his eyes not to spill over. He retreated away slowly from the other boy, his back hitting the door. Blaine took a tentative step towards the small boy, trying not to feel offended when Kurt cringed back slightly.
"Do what? Kurt, please! You already know I have problems with – with this relationship stuff, with sex stuff, and I thought we could get around that, but now! Now you expect me to give this stuff up?" Kurt shook his head, squeezing his eyes shut as hot tears ran down his cheeks. He smacked his hands against his ears, trying to drown out Blaine's words. He began speaking in rushed, frantic sentences.
"I-I can't be around you when you're hurting yourself like this! I know you do these things, a-and I see you do them, and watch you act this way, and yet I find myself still falling for you! I – I can't look at you, and be so disgusted and disappointed in myself for still having feelings for you." Blaine flinched back, a hurt expression falling over his features. He looked utterly in shock, speechless. Kurt whipped around and opened the door, stepping halfway out before turning around to face the other boy. "I'm sorry Blaine. I can overlook your – your thing where you don't know how to be in a relationship with someone, but it's too confusing and sickening to fall for a drug addict..." He shook his head slightly, fresh tears pooling in his eyes. He swallowed audibly, continuing to back out of the door, and let out a bitter, tear-filled laugh. "What kind of person lets themselves fall in love with someone who hurts themselves? It's like I'm… approving of you hurting yourself… Or – or like I'm hurting you, myself."
"That was – that was good, you guys," Kurt yawned, stretching his arms above his head lazily. He scanned the faces in front of him and blinked a few times, then arched an eyebrow. "Would have been a lot better if we weren't missing more than a quarter of our Warblers…" He waited for someone to say something, but when no one did, he sighed. "Anyone know where Nick and Jeff are?"
Trent shared a quick look with Wes and the latter sighed. "Thing 1 got the shit beat out of him again because he still hasn't paid Vince back, and Thing 2 is busy fixing Thing 1's face…" Kurt raised an eyebrow at Wes's nicknames for the two boys, but rolled his eyes and shrugged.
"Well, whatever. I hope Nick's okay…" A few of the guys shrugged in response. "But, on a happier note, I know you guys have been getting really bored with practicing warm-ups and a cappella exercises, so," Kurt turned around and picked up a folder that was lying on the piano and waved it in front of the boys' faces teasingly. "I have a little surprise for you!" He opened the folder and whipped out the first sheet, then revealed it to the guys with an excited smile.
The small group of boys, minus one, cheered at the sight of the song title.
"Grenade! That's awesome!" Trent whooped, turning to high-five David. Kurt smiled and nodded, though his face dropped significantly as he took in Thad's unenthusiastic attitude.
"Y-yeah. Well, the first day I heard you guys singing, you were trying – and failing, might I add – to do an a cappella version of this song, so I thought it would be a good start. Something that…you guys…would be passionate…to work on – Thad?" Kurt had lost focus in his words as he continued to stare at his roommate's expressionless face. "Do you not want to do this song? We can look into another one if you-"
"No, Kurt. I do… Sorry, I'm just sort of out of it today." He replied in a monotone voice, not sounding very convincing, but Kurt nodded slowly, then turned to face the rest of the group.
"Right. Well, this song is specifically designed for an a cappella choir, so it should be-"
"Do I get the lead?" Blaine interrupted, sounding giddy. He locked eyes with Kurt for a moment and his smile faltered, still slightly unsure of where they stood, due to the recent complications. Kurt's lips twitched up slightly, causing the curly-haired boy slight relief and to recover his dopey grin. The pale boy nodded slowly, but held the sheet music away as a few hungry hands tried to snatch it from him.
"Not so fast. There's one condition-" He was cut off by a chorus of moans. "Hey now! None of that! We will do this song… But the arrangement is made for a choir of at least 10 members… And it would be nice to have more than one person doing the bass and drum parts…" The boys stood in front of him with expectant looks, pretty sure they knew what was coming next. "So, that being said, we will do this song if we get more members to join. Or at least try to get more members. I propose we ask the guys in group." There were a few small noises of reluctant agreement, and Kurt smiled. He began passing out the sheet music and assigning parts. "Now, I'll go give Jeff and Nick their parts, but you guys are in charge of trying to give the guys in group their music. You said most of them were in the Warblers before it was disbanded, so try your best at judging their vocal ranges."
David raised an eyebrow skeptically, eyes flickering up from his music to look at the young boy. "So… We're just gonna tell them to come sing with us? And guess what parts they can do…?" Kurt nodded, pursing his lips together slightly.
"…Pretty much… And I know we're all pretty busy this week, with midterms coming up pretty soon, so… How about you hand out the music, everyone looks it over, practices it a little, and we'll meet again next Saturday."
"Same time?"
"Yes. 4:30… Oh! And don't forget… Our practices are still…on the down low. So make sure to mention that to the other guys." There were a few nods, and Kurt smiled and clapped his hands together. "Alright, then! Meeting…adjourned!" Wes stayed where he stood with a contemplative look on his face as the others began filing out.
"You know, we should get one of those little hammer things. What are they called? A Gavel! You know, for formality, and everything…" No one seemed to pay his idea much attention, but David gave him an incredulous look as he pulled his jacket on, a sly smile playing at his lips.
"A gavel…? Really, Wes?" He laughed and shook his head at his Asian roommate, motioning for him to follow him as he made his way to the exit. Kurt grinned fondly at his friends, but his smile dropped when he noticed Thad slowly pulling his coat on, a sad, distant look on his face. Kurt approached his roommate and tentatively placed a hand on his shoulder, getting the other boy's attention.
"Thad… Are you okay?" The dark-haired boy gave him a curious glance, like he was about to say 'what are you talking about?', but Kurt narrowed his eyes and gave him a stern look. "Don't give me that look… You can't act like you haven't been…" He gestured to his roommate's distressed features. "…lately…" Thad sighed and crossed his arms over his chest, an obvious wall being placed up.
"I'm just… There's just some stuff going on," he shrugged, his lips coming together to form a tight line. Kurt simply nodded in response, knowing that if Thad wanted to tell him, he most likely would.
"If you want to talk to me about it, you can, Thad…" The dark-haired boy broke eye contact with his pale roommate and nodded, keeping his head down and heading out the door without another word. Kurt followed his path with his eyes and sighed, then walked out the door himself, turning around only to replace the replica heavy-duty lock on the big double doors. The boys had bought an imitation lock to replace the one the school had placed on the doors when the Arts Building was originally closed. They had cut off that lock ages ago, and bought one that they had the key to, for more convenient break-ins.
Kurt sighed and began making his walk towards the dorm building, where he figured Nick and Jeff would be. He needed to give them their sheet music, which could probably wait until later, but he didn't have anything better to do, and he also had something else he needed to give Jeff.
He ran his fingers along the cold metal of the item in his coat pocket, feeling the tiny letters that jutted out from the otherwise flat surface. He remembered a few hours before, when he had stepped over the dog tag necklace, tripping over the chain in his hasty attempt to get to Warblers rehearsal. It had been over a week since he had given the blonde boy his haircut, and he had forgotten his chain on Kurt's floor, but neither of them seemed to realize it.
Kurt thought back over the past week, and all the events that had unfolded, all the conversations he'd had.
It was Wednesday morning and Kurt stepped out of his shower, after another unpleasant bout of physical exertion. At least he'd gotten to sleep in to his normal time, unlike the previous week, and was able to resume his usual routine of showering after class. He pulled on a pair of boxer briefs and his uniform white oxford, sighing as the shirt stuck to his slightly still-wet body. He stepped into his bedroom only to see Blaine sitting on his bed, chatting quietly over a cigarette with Thad.
At the sound of the door opening, both boys turned around to face Kurt, and the young boy stopped in his tracks, taken by surprise by the sight before him. Blaine cocked an eyebrow and blew the smoke from his mouth, his eyes raking over Kurt's barely-dressed body. His pants tightened around his crotch as he appreciated the definition of the young boy's stomach through his white shirt, as well as the fact that he could make out the outlines of the Kurt's cock through his thin cotton underwear. Blaine noted the feeling he got in the pit of his stomach as he took in the expanse of milky skin of the boy's thighs, and he crossed his legs, taking a long drag of his cigarette as he continued to watch Kurt stare at them blankly, frozen where he stood.
Suddenly Kurt made a small, incoherent noise of confusion and fumbled around to grab a towel from the room behind him, covering his waist hastily. He stood awkwardly for another few moments like that and Thad sighed dramatically. He stood and chucked the uniform slacks that were on Kurt's bed to the pale boy, who caught them swiftly, then plopped his cigarette butt into the soda can on his table and made his way to the door.
"Don't pop a boner over there, Kurt... I'll see you guys later." And with that, Thad left the room and shut the door behind him, leaving the two boys in the room in silence. Blaine dropped his cigarette butt into the soda can and began to light a new one, and Kurt took this opportunity to frantically pull on his uniform slacks. Blaine turned back to face him and his eyes ran over the young boy's body again as he drew in a deep hit.
"So… Kurt. I wanted to talk to you." Kurt nodded, trying not to be distracted by the small streak of grease on the boy's forearm, visible as his shirtsleeve was rolled up, still present from his auto shop class.
"I figured that much..." Kurt sat down on Thad's bed, sitting across from the Blaine. The other boy opened his mouth as though to speak, but closed it again. He ran a hand through his curls and stood up, taking a seat beside the smaller boy, who eyed him questioningly.
"Kurt… I'm…sorry about what happened on Sunday." Kurt glanced at him sideways, and when he said nothing in response, Blaine continued. "I – I'm sorry that there's so much shit that's making it hard for us to be…anything," he sighed, tilting his head to try to look at Kurt's face better. "And I really do want to try to – to be in some kind of…relationship with you. Something that's more than just sex… And I'm trying to figure out – look inside myself, to see what's making that so hard for me. I really am. And…" He tapped the ashes of his smoke into the soda can and stared blankly at the floor in front of him. "And I want to try to get off the...drugs." At this, Kurt's head snapped up to face him, and Blaine glanced sideways at the young boy, a small, crooked smile playing at his lips.
"Really…?" Blaine nodded slowly, gazing into the smoke that rose from the stick in his hand.
"Really. And – and I'm not…guaranteeing anything – not right away, at least – but I want you to know that I'll try. I don't know how, but I'm going to try." Kurt could hardly believe the words he was hearing. Someone, some other human being, a gorgeous boy, at that, was willing to give up his addiction to hard drugs…for him.
Kurt yawned as he pushed the door to the dorm building open, thinking back to his sleepless night. He had experienced another nightmare. The same one. The same one he'd had occur randomly for the past six or so months since it had happened. The same one he'd had every time he'd close his eyes for the past week straight. The one where he had to watch himself being raped and couldn't do anything to help.
Kurt shifted his focus to the conversation he'd had with a few of the guys the day before, regarding Blaine's drug problem.
"-probably just short-supplied. You saw what happened last time he tried to get off the stuff. I don't think he'd try that again. Especially not this soon." Trent considered what the dark-haired boy said and shrugged, shoveling another spoonful of stew into his mouth.
"I guess. But he said he didn't want to shoot up, not that he couldn't, or didn't have enough." Kurt approached the table and dropped his tray down, raising a curious eyebrow at the suddenly silenced conversation.
"Were…you guys talking about Blaine?" The two boys shared a glance and then nodded. Kurt nodded in response and poked his salad lazily. "About…him quitting drugs?" He questioned casually and Trent and Nick shared another look. Wes sat down and, having overheard Kurt's last comment, raised an eyebrow.
"Who, Blaine? Is he trying to get clean again?"
Trent looked up from his food. "He was acting all cranky, and I told him to quit bitching and go get a fix, and he said he didn't want to…" The boy shrugged. "But he might just not have that much and is trying to, like, spread it out over the days, or whatever." Wes nodded in agreement.
"Yeah, like, ration it." Kurt raised an eyebrow curiously. Had he not told his friends that he was trying to stop…?
"He told me he was trying to quit." The boys all looked at him incredulously. "..I kind of told him I wouldn't be with him if he was all strung out… And… I guess he took that as motive to get clean." Wes raised his eyebrows in surprise and let out a low whistle.
"Wow… I guess he really does like you… Now that you mention it, he has been moodier lately."
"And shaky… Like real shaky. Like when he tried to quit before." Trent added, still piling food into his mouth. Nick nodded thoughtfully, then looked at Kurt.
"I guess Sunday will be the real test." Kurt raised an eyebrow.
"Sunday…?"
"Well, since Halloween's on Monday, we're all celebrating it Sunday this year. And we're gonna party pretty hard. If Blaine stays sober – well, not sober, but…not on heroin, anyway – I'll give him props."
Since Kurt and Blaine's conversation, they had fallen into some kind of flirty, slightly confusing, friendship. It was like they both wanted to be together, but were waiting for the time it could happen. It all rested on Blaine's shoulders, and from what the other boys had said, it seemed like he was really trying to get off the stuff.
Kurt stood outside Jeff and Nick's door, smiling as he overheard bits of their conversation.
"-all swollen. And this is still bleeding a little bit. Shit, Nick. Hold still for a freaking second-"
"Ah! Fuck, Jeff!"
"Sorry… Just... There. How's that?"
Kurt knocked on the door, interrupting the chat. Kurt heard Jeff yell 'come in!' and opened the door slightly, poking his head in. Nick was lying down on his bed, looking a mix between pissed off, humiliated, and tired, and had a fresh bandage taped across his cheek. Jeff was packing up the contents of his First Aid kit, and glanced up when Kurt opened the door. He gave the pale boy a small smile.
"Oh. Hey, Kurt." The blonde boy shoved the small kit into a high place in his closet as Kurt walked in, closing the door behind himself. Jeff turned to face the other boy completely, leaning against the closet door. "Sorry we couldn't, um, make it to Warblers today… But…" He gestured vaguely to Nick lying in bed. "…This kind of happened. And it's still kind of bleeding, so I've been changing the bandages pretty often." Kurt nodded and glanced at Nick again. Aside from the bandage on his face, there was a large, red bump on his forehead that looked particularly painful, not to mention the black eye that was still healing.
"…Don't worry about it, you guys. Um… what, um – I mean – is he okay?"
Jeff shifted his glance over to his dark-haired roommate and tilted his head thoughtfully. "Yeah. He's… I mean, Vince – you know, the guy he owes money to – kind of shoved him against a wall. That's what gave him the huge-ass bump. Then he, like, socked him right in the face. And he had a ring on, so it broke the skin. I think it'll be fine, though. It doesn't look too bad. Shouldn't need any stitches, or anything…" Kurt nodded, then remembered the reason he came. He pulled two sets of music from the folder in his hands and held them out to Jeff proudly.
"Well, I actually came by to give you this." The blonde boy took the music and, after reading the title, broke out into a grin. "I have the other guys handing out other parts to the guys in group, so that should be interesting… Seeing how that plays out… But, anyway, we're meeting next Saturday at 4:30," he nodded and then fished around in his coat pocket until presenting the shiny dog tag. "Aaand, you left this in my room last week." Jeff's eyes widened slightly and he quickly touched his neck, feeling the place where the chain usually lived.
"Oh. Wow. I can't believe I didn't notice… Thanks." The blonde boy returned it to its rightful place around his neck and nodded. Kurt smiled and there was a beat of silence before he spoke.
"What's it from, anyway?"
"What?" Kurt pointed down to his neck.
"I mean, it has all the stuff on it like it was actually from the military. Where'd you get it?" Jeff picked up the piece of worn metal and inspected it for a moment, running his fingers over the embossed letters.
Sterling
Jeffrey S.
113-65-6729
O Pos.
No Religious Pref.
"We made them in the Warblers at the end of sophomore year, when we heard the department was being cancelled. I guess the other guys don't really wear them all the time, but I think they're pretty cool." Kurt cocked an eyebrow, but smiled, nevertheless.
"Don't you think it's kind of a bad idea to wear a chain around your neck that has your social security number on it?"
"…Well. At least if I'm ever in an accident or something, they'll know what blood type I am… And they'll know to not pray for me."
"B… B…" The blonde man sighed, eyes darting around the room nervously. He shook the boy one more time, this time more forcefully. "Blaine!" Blaine's eyes fluttered slightly open, and his dull hazel eyes were met with a pair of harsh blue ones. He jumped slightly, then winced and clutched his stomach with a pained expression on his face.
"Ugh… W-what happened?" Jeremiah narrowed his eyes in annoyance and sat down on the foot of the bed, still completely naked. He sighed irritably as the younger boy came to a sitting position dizzily.
"You passed out… While we were still…" He trailed off, but the unsaid words were obvious. Blaine blinked a few times, confused, and ran a hand through his hair.
"I – sorry. I've been trying to – I was trying to – to quit, so I threw most of my stuff out. Then I started craving, but I didn't have that much left, so I – I've been skipping meals to try to…" He made a small gesture with his hand, trying to find the right phrase. "…extend the high because I was only able to shoot up, like, once a day. So I've been pretty dizzy lately…" The blonde cocked an eyebrow, sort of wondering why he was being told all of this, then crossed his arms over his bare chest.
"You know that doesn't really work, right?"
A slightly irritable look fell onto Blaine's face. "Well, it was the best I could do... And it worked for me! Now can you please just give me my shit and leave? I have to get to my group therapy class in, like, an hour, and I'd like to have had a fix by then." Jeremiah blinked a few times, then tilted his head to the side.
"B… you kind of…" He gestured to the bed messily. "…before I could get off." Blaine's eyebrows knotted together and he glanced down, only now noticing the man's still hard penis, condom still on. Blaine let out a frustrated moan and fell onto his back. "Sorry, Blaine. But you know this is the deal we made... Just flip over, I won't last long..." Blaine sat up slowly, his face slightly twisted in pain. He held his stomach again.
"Jer, please. I feel really sick…" The blonde shrugged and rolled his eyes, yanking off the condom and throwing it angrily into the trash bin. He shook his head as he searched for his boxers.
"Not how it works, Blaine. But whatever. If you don't want to, you can wait for a fix until next time I see you…" Blaine looked like he was honestly considering this offer, his face still contorted in pain from his obvious nausea. His body gave an involuntary jolt, something that happened a lot lately from his drug weaning, and he focused his gaze back on the man in his room.
"Jeremiah… Come on. I'm dying over here." Jeremiah shrugged, annoyed that he was left unsatisfied.
"You know what the deal is," he turned back to face the younger boy. "But I'm warning you now… You probably really want this. I'm going out of town for a while and-"
"What?" Blaine jumped up and snatched the underwear the blonde had finally located out of his hand. "Wait, what am I supposed to do, then…?"
"I thought you said there were plenty of guys who would give this deal to you?" The blonde asked, his voice dripping in attitude and irritation.
"What about Z? Is he still dealing-?"
"Not for you, he's not. He doesn't accept fucks as payment anymore." Blaine's eyes flickered around, panicking as he ran through mental lists. He finally looked back up to Jeremiah with a pleading look on his face.
"What if you give me a couple weeks supply in advance and I-?"
"No! Damn it, B! You know the deal we made, you know how it works! You know you could actually pay for this stuff and-"
"I don't have the money for that! I hardly have enough to keep up my damn nicotine addiction-"
"Not my fucking problem. Now if you want anything from me today, you're gonna get the fuck on that bed, and you're gonna get out another condom!" Blaine nodded slowly, a wounded expression dominating his features. He walked over to his bedside drawer and began rifling through its contents, but froze and turned around to the blonde.
"What if I – Can I just blow you, or something…?" The blonde shook his head exasperatedly and walked over to the drawer and retrieved a condom himself, and began stroking himself into full hardness again.
"No. Just get on your fucking stomach, Anderson."
Kurt hummed to himself as he made his way up to his floor hastily. There was still about 45 minutes before group, but he thought it would be nice to hang out with Blaine beforehand, possibly walk with him there. Since their little talk and since he had heard from some of the guys that Blaine seemed to be trying to quit, he had enjoyed spending time with the boy. It seemed like their possible relationship was inching closer and closer to reality every day.
He suddenly collided with another figure as he turned a corner and jumped away instinctively. "Oh! I – I'm sorry!" Kurt informed the other person quickly, though as Kurt took in his appearance, he realized he didn't recognize the blonde boy. He seemed older than a high school student. The blonde shrugged and quickly made his way towards the stairs and past Kurt, who followed his path with a raised eyebrow.
"Hey, Kurt!" Kurt whipped his head around, only to come face to face with Trent and Thad, who still looked depressed and cold. Kurt forced a small smile and turned towards the bigger teen who had greeted him.
"Hey you guys… Um… Do you know who that guy was? The blonde one?" The two boys shared a confused glance and each of them shrugged. "I dunno… He just looked kind of old to go here and-"
"Oh!" Trent interrupted, realization dawning on his face. "Kinda tall? Long, curly, blonde hair?" Kurt nodded slowly, a curious eyebrow raised. "That's Blaine dealer. He comes by on the weekends to hook Blaine up, or whatever. Usually comes by on Saturdays, though." Kurt's eyes widened dramatically and his jaw went slack. He blinked a few times, trying to wrap his head around what the other boy had just told him.
"W-what? His… His heroin dealer?" The boy whispered the second to last word, a tone of disgust evident in his voice. Trent and Thad nodded casually, not fully understanding his reaction. Kurt's eyes fell to the floor and he had to will himself not to give in to the feeling of breaking down. Not now. Not here. "He… I thought he was trying to get clean?" Thad scoffed lightly, rolling his eyes.
"Blaine's always trying to get clean. He goes for about a week or two and then gives in again… The thing he's got going with that guy-" Thad pointed in the direction Jeremiah had gone. "-is just too much to turn down, I guess. He doesn't even pay for it." At this, Kurt's eyebrows shot up in surprise.
"He doesn't…pay for it?"
"…Well… He fucks for it."
And with that, Kurt found himself flinging open Blaine's door, face scrunching up in rage as his eyes raked over the scene in front of him. Blaine jumped violently from his position on his bed, presumably naked beneath the covers that were around his waist, holding a lighter in one hand, its flame heating the contents of a cut-off soda can bottom which was oh-so-casually sitting in his other hand. Kurt's eyes darted around, looking at the room, at Blaine's messy hair and sweaty forehead, at the rumpled bed sheets, at the small syringe lying on his bedside table.
"Kurt! What the fuck are you doing?" Kurt stepped fully into the room and slammed the door behind himself, torn between breaking into sobs and breaking Blaine's floor lamp.
"What the fuck – what the fuck am I doing?" He screamed, motioning wildly with his hands at everything before him. "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?" He dug his hands into his hair and let out a strangled sob. Blaine reluctantly put down his materials and pulled his covers more tightly around himself, sighing.
"Kurt, look. I told you that-"
"NO! YOU LOOK!" The pale boy let out another broken cry, taking a step to approach the other boy. He lowered his voice as he began to softly cry. "Y-you broke your promise t-to me! You broke both of your promises to me!" When Blaine gave him a slightly confused look, Kurt fiercely threw his arm up and pointed to a small shiny object on the bed. "You think I'm stupid? The condom wrapper is right there, Blaine! I know you have sex for drugs, and I know you just did that with that guy that was walking down the hall!"
Blaine let out a tired sigh, running his hands over his face. "Kurt, I told you this would be hard for me-"
"No! You said you'd try to quit! And you said you – you wanted to be with me! And not just hook up with guys! And then here you are!" He let out a harsh, bitter laugh. "Hooking up with guys for drugs!" Kurt turned his back to Blaine and let his body shake with a few good sobs, tears breaking free and streaming down his flushed cheeks, red from screaming.
Blaine tugged on his own hair and let out a pained moan, watching this fragile boy hurt because of him. "Oh God, Kurt, please, just-"
"I am so fucking disappointed in you, Blaine Anderson." And Kurt walked out the door, slamming it for a second time.
Blaine considered briefly jumping up to go follow him, follow the beautiful boy he'd become somehow so attached to. The boy he just wanted to hold, or kiss, one more time. But the familiar twinge ran through his body again, screaming for a fix, and he picked up the forgotten soda can filled with a dose of drugs and began heating the contents again with his lighter. He dropped a cotton ball in, letting it absorb the liquid and placing it down on his table. He retrieved the green elastic band from his supply box from where he had placed it on the floor and, using his teeth as assistance, Blaine tied the band around his left arm, slapping his forearm a few times before picking a vain that hadn't completely collapsed from abuse.
He picked up the syringe and watched carefully as it soaked up the delicious fluid from the cotton, being careful to avoid air bubbles, and held it up in front of his face. I have nothing, he thought momentarily, before plunging the needle into his arm, ripping off the band and letting himself be taken over by the sweet feeling of narcotics.
Fuming, Kurt stomped down the hall towards his group therapy classroom. Sure, he'd be early, but he needed to do something. Walking was something. He'd walked from the dorm building down through the courtyards and past the office building. He'd walked all the way to Arts and back to the dorm, and now he was walking here. Walking was definitely something. He couldn't believe he'd let himself get tangled up in the mess that was Blaine Anderson. How could he have been so blind? Of course Blaine wouldn't stop using.
I've gotten my heart broken before… Why does it hurt so much more this time…?
Kurt sighed as he turned a corner, noting the hallway was completely empty and subconsciously increasing his pace.
I was so careful this time… I watched out for myself, I was warned of him, I told myself I wouldn't do this… And then I felt like after everything he said, everything he promised me, it was finally safe, and now this…? He shook his head in frustration. I let myself go so far with this one, too far. I gave him my first real kiss. The first kiss that I willingly gave to a boy… Why did I love the fact that it tasted like smoke…?
"Sup, fag!" Chills ran down Kurt's body and before he could even contemplate whether to turn around, to run, or to scream for help, he was tackled roughly to the ground, his cheek coming in contact with the floor, causing heat to rush to his face. Someone grabbed his right arm, twisting it painfully behind his back, and pushed him heatedly further into the ground, and he felt his nose make a sick crunching sound, though the surprising lack of pain suggested it didn't break.
A few snickers could be heard and he realized that there was more than one person there. This was happening again. He was being attacked by a group of guys. Whoever was pushing down on his bent him arm again, sending an electrifying, sharp twinge of pain to shoot down his entire arm and back, causing him to let out a strangled yelp of pain. Another set of hands soon found the hand of the arm that was being tortured and crushed it roughly, and Kurt released another cry, sure his fingers were broken. He squeezed his eyes shut and suddenly the weight was lifted off of him and he could hear a strange assortment of voices, mostly yelling, and wondered what was happening. Kurt attempted to lift himself from the ground to try to inspect his surroundings, but his shoulder gave out, still sore from being unnaturally pushed behind his back. He rolled onto his back and gasped.
He first noticed David, his dark skin sticking out among the rest, pressing a boy with a shaved head against a wall, then Nick and Jeff, both clumsily attempting to hold off a short, husky, dark-haired boy, each of them having captured one of his arms as he struggled and tried to throw punches, and then he saw Blaine. Blaine – sweet, stupid, drug-addicted, sex-manipulating, Blaine – was on the ground beneath a red-haired boy, holding both of his arms and trying to gain dominance as Wes seemed to be yanking – or at least trying to – said red-haired boy off of him.
Finally, the Asian boy seemed to give a forceful-enough tug, and was able to detach the teen from Blaine, and shoved him away, sending him stumbling further down the hall. The two guys apparently with him shoved away from the boys who were holding them and followed the red-haired boy.
"That's right! Back the fuck off! We see you trying to mess with Hummel again, we won't go easy on you." David threatened the other group. Kurt's eyes widened, shocked at how menacing he sounded. He hadn't heard David use that voice since he had first came to Dalton, since he first tried to intimidate Kurt into telling them his name.
"Yeah, yeah, Thompson! You protect your little fairies! We'll get that little lady when he's alone…" The red-haired boy sneered, as the boy with the shaved head suddenly approached Nick, pressing his arm against his neck and pushing the dark-haired boy against the wall.
"And Nicky boy," the teen hissed, pressing his arm firmly against Nick's throat, causing him to choke slightly and grab at the arm for release. Jeff stormed up to the boy and gave a tug on the hood of the teen's sweatshirt, causing him to loosen his hold on Nick slightly and shove the lanky blonde away. "You still owe my brother money. He's not gonna wait around much longer. You got that?" He pushed against the dark-haired boy one last time before releasing him, without waiting for an answer, and went back to join the others as they retreated down the hallway.
Kurt watched, wide-eyed from his position still on the ground, his injured shoulder and mangled hand throbbing painfully loud in his ears. Wes scanned around the small battle scene, watching as Blaine dusted himself off. The Asian boy caught sight of Kurt and rushed over to him, kneeling beside him and reaching a hand out tentatively to his arm.
"Are you alright, Kurt?" Blaine, apparently having approached the young boy as well, asked, bending over to look at Kurt's face. Still angry about their fight that happened only 20 or so minutes ago, Kurt huffed and turned to face Wes, watching intently as the boy tried to roll Kurt sleeve up to look at his hand.
"Shit. David…? Can you come look at this?" The Asian boy called behind him, and soon his dark-skinned roommate kneeled down as well, looking concerned before gently taking the young boy's injured limb in his hands, causing Kurt's face to scrunch up in pain. David turned his hand over, noticing the swelling and bruising near the base of his joints and sighed.
"Can you move it?" Kurt wiggled his fingers slightly, but winced and took in a sharp breath. The young boy nodded his head slowly, a pained expression taking over his delicate features.
"Yeah, I think – I think it might be broken. My hand, or fingers or something." He used his other hand to point to a place between his wrist and knuckles where the swelling was the worst. "It… I think it's broken right here…" David sighed and nodded, then covered his mouth with his hand, a contemplative look on his face.
"Yeah… Well, go to the nurse's. Say you fell, or something. Landed badly on your wrist…" Kurt wasn't sure why they weren't telling the truth, but he nodded anyway, trusting his friend's advice. "Um… Someone should take him there though. He's probably gonna get pretty dizzy if it is broken. Jeff, or Blaine, or someone. Help him walk over there, okay?"
"No!" Kurt exclaimed suddenly, causing everyone present to give him incredulous looks. "I don't want Blaine to take me." Said curly-haired boy nodded, eyes locked on the floor and lips drawn together in a tight line. The other boys all exchanged confused, skeptical glances. Wes, who was still kneeling beside Kurt, narrowed his eyes at Blaine, then turned to face the pale boy.
"O-okay… Who would you like to take you, Kurt…?" Kurt looked at the Asian boy and sat thoughtfully for a moment. He knew he was being rather immature, but if he had a choice who could take him, he most certainly didn't want the stupid, curly-haired boy of his damn affections to be there, making his discomfort even worse.
"Jeff," Kurt decided, realizing fully that he sounded like a five year old being stubborn at picking a coloring-time partner. Wes nodded slowly, then glanced sideways to make eye contact with the blonde boy, who nodded in agreement to take the boy.
"Come on, Kurt. I'll take you," he said, coming forth to help the small boy up carefully, watching as he cradled his injured arm protectively. "That was Renny, by the way… Too bad we weren't able to warn you about him before…" The boys all nodded somberly and Jeff placed his hand on the small of Kurt's back to guide him off towards the nurse's station. Once they were out of sight, everyone who remained turned pointedly at Blaine, who shrugged sheepishly, a frown pulling at his mouth.
"Care to explain what that was all about…? Why Kurt wanted to be nowhere near you…?" Wes asked bitterly, folding his arms over his chest and tilting his head.
"Nope."
As Kurt made his way down the hall, guided gently by Jeff, he suddenly recognized that he had just been attacked. His knees wobbled slightly at the realization and Jeff had to steady him, shooting him a questioning glance, silently asking him if he was okay. When Kurt continued walking, his eyebrows furrowed together, thinking about all the things happening around him in his life.
He was the target of a new group of homophobic Neanderthals, Blaine was somewhat trying to pursue him, seemingly regardless of his suffering drug and relationship problems, Nick was in some serious trouble, or so it seemed, due to his money complications. Thad was still hardly talking to anyone, Kurt especially, and was having some kind of personal troubles, making him withdraw into himself.
These things were just enclosing in on Kurt and suffocating him too fast. It was only a matter of time before it all came crashing down, or came to a boil and something bad happened…
"K-Kurt! Kurt!" David stumbled over to the small boy and clumsily clapped him on the back, then grasped it tightly to stable himself. "I'm glad that – that your hand is – is okay," he slurred, his drink sloshing over the side of his cup slightly and he began laughing at the sight, bending over, still clutching onto Kurt's shoulder as his giggles took over his body. The young boy chuckled lightly in response, holding his own drink with his injured hand.
"Y-yeah! I'm glad it wasn't – wasn't broken," Kurt giggled in response, holding up his wrapped, sprained hand as proof, causing both boys to break out into another round of laughing as he, too, spilled his drink slightly.
Blaine watched this interaction from across the room where he sat with Thad, his eyes narrowing as he huffed. He took a long swig from the bottle of vodka in his hands and coughed slightly, passing it to Thad, who took it hungrily. "I-I hate this shit, man. S-seriously, Thad, he's – he's, like, ignoring me." The other boy nodded slowly and solemnly, his eyes falling shut after he took a drink from the bottle.
"I hear ya, B," he nodded the bottle towards the curly-haired boy. "Life…" Thad started, looking thoughtful before responding. "…sucks... So," he passed the bottle back to Blaine, slurring his words together and letting his face fall into a pained expression. "Drink up! M-maybe then, everything will suck…less."
Blaine nodded, taking a swig and wincing slightly at the burn of the alcohol and then a beat of silence fell over the two boys before he spoke. "I think he – he hates me. Yeah, he hates me," he decided, watching Kurt with a longing expression, then took another hit of the vodka.
"He doesn't hate you, B. He likes you so much it hurts," Thad informed him, following his gaze to watch the pale boy laugh with Wes and David over a bag of chips. "Trust me, unlike my – my problem, yours is gonna work out fine… I'm bored…" He realized suddenly, then stood up, snatching the bottle from Blaine and holding it up triumphantly. "Never have I ever!"
Collective drunken whoops were heard throughout the room and the boys all stumbled to gather around in a small circle on the ground, the bottles of various alcohols and shot glasses placed in the center.
"Isn't this kind of gay?" Trent blurted out as he sat down, then shot glances at Kurt and Blaine. "S-sorry… I mean, isn't this kind of lame? Never have I ever?" Nick shoved the bigger teen on the shoulder, though there was a teasing smile present on his face.
"Just shut up and pour a shot. It's fucking Halloween!" Everyone in the room poured themselves shots and Thad was about to start the game when Jeff let out an overdramatic whine.
"Ah, man. You guys, i-it's Halloween and we forgot to d-dress up!" He giggled, stumbling over his words in his intoxicated state. The guys all laughed and Wes held his hand up in protest.
"No! No, we dressed up… W-we're…teenage delinquents," Wes decided, noddingfirmly, pronouncing the last two words very carefully, like he had a hard time speaking. Thad let out a low chuckle, something none of the boys had really heard in the past week, and held a hand up.
"Yes, yes. Okay… Never have I ever…fucked Jeff's sister." Everyone in the room, aside from Thad, Jeff, Blaine and Kurt took a shot. Jeff rolled his eyes, then shot an incredulous look at Wes.
"Wes! When did you – when did you sleep with Sarah?" The Asian boy grinned and shared a dirty look with David.
"Last month… When – when she came by to visit you and you were in counseling," he snickered, looking at his roommate again. "M-me and David! We – we both fucked her s-so hard!" The blonde boy's eyes widened tremendously.
"You h-had a threesome with my sister?" Trent laughed, letting his head fall back, having to use his hand to brace himself.
"You're sister's such a slut, bro." Jeff sighed and ran a hand down his face.
"…I know… Anyway. N-never have I ever…had sex!" All the boys groaned and took shots, Kurt with a gloomy expression on his face as he did so. "Ha! N-now whose sister…is – is a slut!" David cocked an eyebrow and looked at the blonde boy.
"Still yours… And b-being a virgin? Not… Not something to be proud of…" Jeff grunted and the dark-skinned boy chuckled lightly in reply. "Never have I ever…" He scanned the room, looking for something to say. "…gotten a piercing." He smiled and looked at Blaine, who rolled his eyes and took a shot, along with Jeff, for his ear stud, and Kurt. A few boys look at the latter questioningly. The pale boy noticed these looks and yanked his sweater up, pointing to the tiny, shiny bar in his bellybutton.
"…Did… Did you guys s-seriously not notice this? Didn't you, like, t-take my shirt off when I stabbed myself?" David cocked an eyebrow, still transfixed on the small piercing, as Kurt lowered his sweater.
"I think… we were a-a little more concerned with, you know, the stab-wound and blood-"
"That's hot," Blaine commented suddenly, causing all eyes to focus on him. He blushed slightly and tried to backpedal. "I-I mean the bellybutton thing, not the – the blood and stuff." Everyone continued to stare and him, Kurt looking slightly angry at the flirtation, and the curly-haired boy cleared his throat. "W-Wes, your turn."
"…Never…have I ever…stolen m-more than $500 worth of – of stuff from a store." Blaine, Jeff, Nick, and Thad all took shots, and Kurt raised an eyebrow, but said nothing. "Your turn, Kurtsie," Wes added, his speech sloppy.
"Never have I ever smoked a cigarette," the pale boy declared proudly, already having prepared one for his turn. Everyone aside from him, Nick and Trent took a shot. The latter two high-fived messily, missing the first time but trying again until they clapped hands. Trent was up next.
"Never have I ever…had sex with a dude!" He pointed at Blaine with a smile, then to Kurt who only frowned in response, but both took shots.
"Never have I ever gotten paid for sex!" Nick nearly screamed, wide, drunken eyes glued to Kurt, waiting for him to take a shot. When the young boy raised an eyebrow at him and crossed his arms across his chest, Nick looked sorely disappointed. "N-no lying, Kurt!"
"I'm not lying!"
"Does getting drugs for sex count?" Blaine mused dazedly out loud, interrupting the verbal battle between Nick and Kurt. When no one replied, he shrugged and threw back the shot. "Whatever. I am… so drunk, anyway," he giggled, seemingly having trouble pronouncing every syllable of the sentence. "'S my turn…? Never…have I…ever…" He snorted, falling forward slightly. "…had anyone 'sides my family t-tell me they love me." When none of the boys took a shot, a different air took over the small room. Kurt suddenly let out a bitter laugh.
"We're – we're all really p-pathetic, aren't we?" No one said anything and Kurt continued laughing harshly, and then let out a strangled sound that was a sad mix between a laugh and a cry. The young boy buried his face in his hands and his body trembled with sobs. He removed his hands and looked at the boys in front of him, who were all giving him sloppy, slightly dazed, confused pity-stares. "D-do you guys think that – that everyone we left behind in our – our lives hates us? B-because of what fuck-ups we are?" Everyone looked at him, not sure what to say to the emotional boy.
Blaine, in his non-sober state, crawled across the circle, carefully avoiding the bottles and shot glasses, to the hysterical boy, and wrapped his arms around him. Kurt flinched initially at the sudden contact, but only proceeded to cry harder and bury his face into Blaine's shoulder, breathing in his smoky scent.
"Shh, baby…" Kurt wasn't exactly sure how it happened, but Blaine wiped away the tears on his cheek with his thumb, then kissed the spot softly. The next thing he knew, the curly-haired boy was kissing the corner of his mouth, and he was leaning into the affection. Perhaps it was due to both of the teens' inebriated states, or their deep-down attraction, but before either of them knew what exactly was happening, Kurt was pressed hard down on the floor with a messy Blaine lying on top of him, their mouths latched onto each other's.
In a part of Kurt's mind, he knew he shouldn't be letting this happen again. He really did. But after a few minutes of heavy kissing – and was that Blaine's hand on his hip? – he couldn't deny how right it felt. But he still knew the long lasting effects of falling for a guy like Blaine were still going to bite him in the ass later, but how could he resist something that felt so perfect? And oh, how he'd longed for this, craved it like a drug…
Blaine ran his hand along Kurt's side and squeezed the side of his ass, initiating a small gasp from the boy, and he grinned into the kiss. Blaine ran his tongue along Kurt's lower lip, and the young boy moaned deep in his throat, causing Blaine to tighten his grasp on Kurt's hip and ass, and pull himself flush against the small boy. Kurt opened his mouth, allowing Blaine's tongue to enter, and he could feel the young boy's hard cock throbbing against his tight jeans on his thigh.
Suddenly, too much like their last kiss, Kurt pushed against Blaine's chest and pulled away, scooting out from underneath him. Blaine brought a hand up to rub his lips slightly, having known this was most likely going to end too soon.
"No. No, Blaine, we're – we're not doing…that," Kurt scolded him, sounding incredibly slurred and intoxicated. He wagged his finger in front of the other boy's face before noticing they had an audience. He turned to look at the rest of his friends, all staring wide-eyed and speechless.
"I'm blaming my hard-on on the fact that I'm s-super smashed… And…I'd get turned on b-by basically anything right now…" Wes said, a deep blush gracing his features. Some of the boys gave him skeptical looks, but the Asian boy just shrugged messily. Blaine was still facing Kurt, and reached out to touch the pale boy's face, but Kurt removed it gently.
"B-but Kurt. You – you kissed me, too."
"That, my g-good sir, is because I am drunk. Very…drunk. I stand by what I said before about…about us being…anything. This… This means nothing!" Blaine nodded, swallowing audibly, but there was a tiny spark somewhere in his heart.
He knew what he felt. He knew how Kurt had responded to the kiss. There was something there. Kurt wanted to be with him, he was just afraid, just scared because of his addiction. There may have been things stopping them from being together, but that didn't mean Kurt didn't want it. There was certainly something there. That most certainly meant something.
The boys stumbled back into their dorm rooms, mere minutes before curfew, and proceeded to pass out, taking special care to lay on their sides and stomachs. Kurt took one more glance around his room through blurry, drunken eyes, looking at his lamp and curtains, his phone charging on his bedside table, and his roommate, already fast asleep, and closed his eyes. Maybe things will blow over… Maybe things will work out for the better in some way…
Kurt sprung out and bed and dashed to the bathroom, barely making it in time before he emptied his stomach into the toilet. He sighed and spit the remaining vomit from his mouth and flushed, standing up to rinse his mouth out. It was still mostly dark out, and he didn't dare turn the lights on. His head throbbed like someone was repeatedly squeezing it, over and over, and his entire right arm ached from where it had been injured the day before, his sprained hand the worst of all. He decided maybe getting completely smashed on a school night wasn't the best idea he'd ever gone along with…
Kurt walked back into his bedroom to get back in bed and stopped dead in his tracks. The entire other side of the room was void of any belongings. Thad's entire desk was cleared off, the posters that used to adorn the walls were missing, the shelves next to his bed were positively bare. Kurt's breath hitched in his throat as he realized his roommate himself was gone as well.
Kurt thought back to the Wednesday before last, when Thad had implied he needed to leave campus. Surely he hadn't… But, his things were completely gone and…
Without a second thought, Kurt sprinted out of his room and frantically knocked on the neighboring door, knowing that at least Jeff knew what was going on in Thad's life and could possibly know what was happening. Not waiting for a response, Kurt swung the door open and gasped when he saw that both Jeff and Nick's beds were also vacant. "What the…?"
Not skipping a beat, he ran a few doors down to Trent's room, knocking loudly and then throwing the door open. Trent's roommate sat up abruptly and then gave Kurt an aggravated look before huffing and falling down back into bed. Kurt thought he was hallucinating when he saw Trent's bed was empty. He ran over to it, to make sure the boy wasn't simply buried beneath the covers.
"'S not here… Get the fuck out!" Trent's roommate, Ryan, mumbled irritably, and Kurt nodded dumbly and fled the room, accidentally slamming it in his hasty attempt to hurry. He stood in the hallway for a second, simply panicking, drawing his hands up to his face and letting out a fretful groan. He quickly ran over to Wes and David's room, not even bothering to knock before flinging the door open, and sighed in tremendous relief when he saw both boys drowsily rise at his entrance.
"Whuh th' fuck, Kurt?" David mumbled, rubbing his eyes with his hands. Before Kurt could respond coherently, Wes looked over at the bedside clock and let out a moan.
"It's 5:30!" Wes screeched and began trying to shield his face with a pillow. At Kurt's paler-than-usual face and speechless horror-struck expression, David sat up, raising an eyebrow.
"Kurt? What's going on?" Kurt pointed to the door, stunned, trying to form a sentence.
"Thad and Jeff and… Thad's gone." At this, both boys shot up out of bed and began walking out the door, and Kurt frantically followed. "And – and so is Jeff, and Nick, and Trent. But Thad… His stuff is all gone, too!" The boys all quickened their pace down the hall until entering Kurt and Thad's dorm, and when they came into the room, Wes and David exchanged a worried glance at the missing possessions.
"Shit," David hissed, then turned around to face Kurt. "Is Blaine still here?" Kurt simply shrugged in response. He hadn't checked to see if Blaine had gone missing as well. "Well, Wes, go check and see if he's there. I'm gonna go talk to Ryan, see if he knows where Trent went… Kurt… Fuck, breathe, Kurt. You look like you're about to hyperventilate." Kurt nodded, still not saying anything and the other two boys fled the dorm.
He looked around Thad's side of the room, noting again how thoroughly empty it was. How had he managed to pack up all this stuff so quickly…? And silently, for that matter? Was he planning an escape of some kind…? What was going on? He suddenly saw a small folded piece of paper and his heart started beating rapidly in his chest. He fumbled to open it with shaky hands and saw his roommate's messy handwriting.
sorry
Sorry…? Was he sorry for leaving? For the reason he left? Kurt seemed to be the only one left out of the loop and he was not having any more of that.
"Shit! David! David! Help! Oh God!" Wes's shaky, frantic voice rung throughout the hall and the Asian boy stumbled blindly into Kurt's room, eyes darting around quickly, his face twisted in panic and horror, seeing Kurt was the only one in there. "Fuck! Kurt!"
"Wes! I found this note and-"
"I think Blaine OD'd!"