1 - I don't own NCIS or any of it's characters. Just using them as inspiration for some fanfictions.
2 - I'm NOT a native english speaker. So there may have mistakes (it certainly have). I'm sorry. My english is not 100%. But it's good. I'm trying hard to let it easy to understand what I tell.
3 - I'm not expert in medicine so I'm sorry if there is something wrong about the medical parts.
By your side
Chapter 6: Going home
Previously on Ncis:
- About my legs. Did you figured out the problem? - McGee asked
- We discussed it a lot. It wasn't easy but we found the problem.
- Is it definitive or reversible? Will I ever be able to walk again?
The expression on the doctor's face became serious again and McGee knew this couldn't be something good.
- We detected a minor spinal cord injury. It's small it was hard to get in an agreement as for the extention of the damages. The spinal cord has the function of conducting nerve impulses from parts of the body to the brain, produce and coordinate activities impulses and muscle reflexes. So any damage can affect the transmission of information that is taken to the brain. And this causes loss of sensibility on the affected zone and you could loose the movements. However in you case, you have what we call of Incomplete spinal cord injury. When the damage causes only partial loss of sensibility and you can recover your movements until 100%. That's the good news. You'll be able to walk again. But you'll need a huge effort during the treatment in which you'll have to go through a large amount of physiotherapy sessions - The doctor said
- These kind of injuries tend to be severe - McGee said - How can I have small proportion injuries when I also had my spine damaged?
- Everything about you had been rare. One of the reasons of the disagreements between the doctors is that seeing such a small damage that wasn't normal and we though we were mistaken. For better asnwers I suggest you to ask your guardian angel. He must be really powerful. Because your improvement is a big mistery.
- I'd call this a miracle. You could as well give the miracles more credit. A lot of people don't belive. But c'mon, you just saw it happening right before your eyes - Abby said
- We're all amazed with your progress. If you keep this way I have no doubts you'll fully recover. However it may take time. More than one year at least if you focus your treatment and put it in the first plan.
- I can't complain. From being almost dead to a possibility of ful recovery. It's a lot of information to handle - McGee was still confused but could feel the hapiness taking control of him.
- I told you Timmy that your life it's going to go back to normal. From the beggining I always knew it. It's amazing to know that I was right the whole time - Abby said holding his hand
- What about now? - Ziva asked - How are you going to preceed?
- We did everything we had to do already. Your health is good and none medication is needed. The physiotherapy sessions will be the only care you'll need.
- So if there's nothing else to do on me, does it means that I'll be discharged anytime soon?
- Anxious to go back home? I guess anyone in your situation would be. Don't worry, if everything go well in two days you'll be released to go home.
- In two days only? Thanks God.
- That's everything I had to tell. Do you have any question? - The doctor asked and McGee waved negatively - I need to go back but later I'll give your directions for the treatment.
- Thank you so much doctor Philipps. For the effort you and your team put on helping him - Abby said and hugged the man. He was surprised by her gesture. The normal gesture of acknowledgment was a shake of hands.
- Don't worry doctor. She loves hugging people - Ziva said and the doctor left the room and Abby went to the bathroom - Congratuations McGee. Soon you'll be out of here. You're so lucky to have Abby as your guardian angel. She never lost her faith no matter as tough the situation was. I guess this battle is so worth when you have someone like Abby, and what she means for you, with arms wide open willing to do everything to help you.
- I can't get used to the idea of having to be tied in a wheelchair. I guess that when it really hits me it's going to be a bad time for me. To have Abby helping me on these moments I'm sure it will make a big difference.
- She will be like a bullet gum stuck on your shoe. But we all will be here for anything you need.
- You mean, a bubble gum glued on my shoe. And yes I know. Being such awesome people as everyone are I know can count on you all. I'd do the same for everyone. I can't wait to be discharged.
- I can picture Tony planning a way to celebrate it - Ziva said as Abby came back - So I guess it's time for me to go, tell the others the news and leave you two alone. See you later - she nodded to Abby and left.
McGee and Abby were alone in the room. They haven't had much time for a talk about themself. They talked about a lot of other things but less about them. They knew they had to have this talk but it wasn't a proper place. As they were lost in their thoughts, which were the same, the room were filled with an awkward silence. When their eyes finaly met, McGee was the first one to smile.
- Oh, I really missed your shy smile, Timmy. I don't know what I'd do if I had lost it forever. If I could never see your smile or having your beautiful eyes staring at me again, If I could never hear your sweet voice saying the most beautiful things to me - Abby said. She was starting to sob as the first tear ran down her face - That would be the death of me too. Because I guess you became a huge part of my life and it has no meaning if you're not around. I don't think I can live without you. I keep hiding things that I shouldn't. Even hiding from myself. I'm so afraid of admitting my own feelings. The thing is that I can't hide it anymore. I've tried to avoit this feeling to not see it. But I can't. I'm sorry it took this blast and almost loosing you to realise I can't hold it to myself. You deserve to know about somethings... I'm so sorry. I should have... - McGee never thought he would ever hear Abby saying this things for him again. He was surprised since he always thought that she was past this. That she didn't feel the same way what he felt for her.
- You don't have to apologize. I've done the same mistakes. I should have talked to you long ago but I had no clue on what would be your reaction. Maybe you just saw me like a best friend and nothing more and I was expecting for something that I couldn't have anymore. It'd be so painful if something ever happen to me and you never get to know what I really wanted to say. The truth that we both know we have been hiding from each other over those years - McGee said and made an gesture for Abby to get closer. She put the chair near his bed and he touched her face - Don't worry Abby. We'll have a lot of chances to talk this. Not now. And not that I don't want to talk about it because I do. But not in a hospital. Just give some time for me to settle to this new condition and everything else. I promise you we'll have this talk - with his hand he pulled gently her face a bit closer to him and with some effort to control his support on the bed he kissed her cheek.
- I know and yes, this is not the right moment for this. But I just thought you should know this bit at least.
- I understand. Just like the Port to Port killer when Mike Franks died. I was afraid that something could happen to you. It happened suddenly and I wasn't prepared to tell you what I really wanted and I barely could finish the phrase. However I'm sure you understood me back then just as I know what you meant a few minutes ago.
- I was always curious to know the rest of what you were saying.
- I don't really know. I mean there were so many things running in my mind and you know sometimes words are not necessary, just a look means more then a lot of words put together - he could see she still wanted to know - If something ever happen to you I'd never be okay again, I'd never be able to keep going without you. I'd die as well. I know being a federal agent can be dangerous at sometimes. And unfortunatelly we lose people who is close to us. It's a risk we take. Kate, Jenny, Mike and many others who died like Agent Cassidy. Their deaths were hard for us. And for me if something happen with you I won't have reasons to live anymore.
- Funny how we never knew what to say or we never had the courage but now it seems easy.
- The truth tend to make things easier - McGee said cleaning the last trace of tear from her face - So what do you have in mind? How are things going out there?
- I wanted so much to hug you Tim. But I believe it would end up keeping you here on the hospital for some more weeks - Abby said laughing
- Oh God. No! I love your hugs but hate hospitals. Guess I can wait until we get home
- Gibbs is helping me with some changes in your apartment.
- What are you doing to my apartment?
- Relax. We're just adapting it for you. I also have rented a wheelchair for you.
- Rented? They rent those things?
- It's hard to find a place who does this. But I found because I don't wanna buy a wheelchair for you. I don't wanna see you for so long in a wheelchair. And when you get able to walk without needing it ever again I'l return it. I don't want to keep it. When you're done I don't want to look back to what you have been through on the next months and probably years since we know it's gonna be hard. But I'll be always here for help. Just please promise me that you will do your best in the physiotherapy sessions.
- I'll try but I'm sure of one thing. Having you by my side will make things better for me. Thanks for everything you've done for me. For saving my life. You had always been such a wonderful person and I willl never be grateful enough.
- You don't need to thank me. Just get better and this will be enough.
After this they stayed in silence. McGee was stroking her hand and Abby would glance at him sometimes and they would end up exchanging a smile. They stayed like this for a little while before they started to talk about random things.
Later in that night the doctors finaly allowed him to get off his bed. They helped him to sit in one of the hospital wheelchairs. Abby was keen to take him for a walk. She was so happy about doing this that he had to remember her they were at the hospital on their way to the small garden.
They kept enjoying the starry night. McGee missed so much the sweet smell of the trees and leaves. The nature smells delight him. As Abby talked about her lab being still in maintenance and that she had new babies machines he couldn't avoid his heart of almost melt at her smile. How could there be any possibility of him not being able to see it again? It would be so painful even that he wouldn't feel if he had been dead by the blast.
Abby was relieved to see McGee having some fun after so long. It was just a walk in the garden but he was really happy doing this. Going far from the bed he had been lying for ages. She knew he'd probably look at simple things like that and see it in other ways. It was normal for people who had an almost death experience.
On the morning scheduled as his discharge from the hospital McGee woke up extremely happy. It felt so good to finally being close to go home. No longer after that Abby came into the room carrying his breakfast on a tray. He couldn't tell why but she looked even more beautiful then usual.
- Wow. This is wonderful - he said looking to the breakfast tray - I don't even know if I deserve such special treatment.
- Of course you do. I'm finally taking you home today. This deserves something special. I made it by myself. With things the doctors allowed me to give you. I hope you like it.
- Are you kidding me? How could I don't like something that comes from you? Besides, I could get used to have such an amazing woman like you bringing me breakfast every day.
- You wish - she said with her sweet smile - But you know, you just need to ask me the proper question.
- Don't tease me. You know I'd do it without thinking twice - McGee said. They looked to each other longer than normal then Abby looked away.
- Enjoy your breakfast while I tidy the things so we can leave the hospital in a few hours.
It had just passed the lunch time when the doctor came in with the discharge authorization papers in hands.
- Congratulation McGee - the doctor Philipps said - Freedom waits for you. You're officially released from the hospital.
- Thank you so much for everything you have done to make possible for me to leave the hospital by the front door. And not for back door and in a coffin. Thanks to all of your team as well for taking care of me and letting me healthy again. I imagine it was tough since I was practically a lost case.
- You're welcome. However it's our duty to do this. Unfortunatelly It's not always possible to help everybody but we do our best. There was a moment when there was nothing we could do for you since we had no response from you. Sometimes the pacient counts too in a successful recover. That's your case. It wasn't all about the medical part. Suddenly you started to react as we wanted and it helped. It's so grateful for a doctor to see his pacient have this huge health improvement.
- Thank you anyway - McGee said greeting the doctor with a handshake.
- Right, I have also some instructions written on this paper for you. It's about some medicines and the physioterapy - the doctor said some more things about the intructions - Your girlfriend is right. Miracles really happen.
- Actually I'm not his girlfriend. We're just friends - Abby said trying to not sound impolite once she was tired of restating this a lot to times
- I'm sorry. My bad. I could swear you were envolved in a relationship. The way you acted towards him all this time made me think this. I won't hold you anymore here. You can go. If you need help to get in the car there are some people at the reception exit who can help you. Just ask them.
They said goodbye to the doctor and Abby started to guide his wheelchair to the parking lot. She was walking fast, almost running when McGee called her atention.
- Abby! Abby! Slow down.
- Why? Don't you wanna get home as soon as you can?
- Yes. Preferably alive. And not arrested for running over someone with the wheelchair either.
- C'mon Tim. You know how good are my driving skills. And by the way, I'm driving your car.
- My car? Oh my God. What have you done to it? Please tell me you didn't hit anything when you drove him - McGee asked and this earned him a head slap - Ouch. What was that for?
- For confusing me with Ziva. She could have hit something not me. Although I must admit that even having a crazy driving style, she is good.
- You said this because you never have to ride the Ncis truck when she drives.
- It works doesn't it? You always get in the crime scene in time. Never late. And for what I know it was only once with you that she drove like a really crazy ninja and that was because she was mad at you and your book Deep Six.
- Yeah but she does that up these days.
- Now is probably Tony's fault. - Abby said - You don't fit in my car in this condition so I had to pick up yours. Unless you want me to do just like Mr Bean and tie your wheelchair to the top of my car just like he tied his armchair. I don't know why people laugh at it. I mean it may actually be fun. And it's not a bad ideia at all.
- Abby! Stop. Just take me home safely. That's enough. I thought Gibbs would come to pick me too. Why isn't him here?
- Well.. He is... busy I guess - she lied. She knew what he was doing but couldn't tell - No. It's not a guess. I'm sure he's busy. There's a crazy case that appeared yesterday. They are wourking hard on it.
- Then why you're not in your lab checking the evidences?
- Because I'm here with you, duh. And there's no evidence yet. I told you it's a crazy case.
- Alright then - McGee was a bit disappointed for not having the team with him in this important moment for him. But he knew the ups and downs of his work and understood the situation.
- Don't get upset Timmy. They will visit you as soon as they can - she assured him. But in reality they had other plan. - Now oyu better use this for a while - she handled him an object.
- Sunglasses? For what?
- Trust me. If you go out there without protection, the sun light will make your eyes burn.
Abby asked someone to help her on sitting McGee in the front seat. He felt so uncomfortable by being so dependent of someone to do things. And this was only the begining of this nightmare. He was so used to be independent since an early age. And now being back to this dependency, and in this case in a worst way, seemed bad.
In the drive to his apartment he kept thinking on it. He knew even hating how he was now he should be grateful since for many people this condition was irreversible while there was still possibility for his recovery. Thinking about how long it could take was not nice. He loved being a field agent. But what if it take so long. What if one day he gets to walk again but not be able to do what he loves. To chase bad guys. To help the team not only with his computer skills but in the field.
While Abby drove, she sometimes threw some glances at him. Some minutes ago he was happy for leaving the hospital. Now she could see he was a bit sad. Maybe reality was starting to making sense for him. When stopped in the traffic light, she could see better his expression when he turned to look at her. He smiled for a little while and then turned back to look through the window. She knew his smile wasn't truthful. He was trying to disguise his sadness. It could maybe work for everyone esle. But not for her. She knew him pretty well to distinguish when what he wanted to make us believe wasn't really the way he felt. She could talk to him now but she decided to let him rest for now.
When they reached their destination Abby helped him to sit in the wheel chair again. It was hard do this but she managed. She left the bags on the trunk to be taken later. As McGee started to guide the wheelchair on his own Abby took her cellphone out of her purse.
- Oh. I have a missed call - She lied and dialed Gibbs number - Hi Gibbs... Yes... Is everything ready?... Now?.. I'm almost done here... Alright. I'm coming - she turned off the call
- Duty is calling for you? - McGee asked when they arrived at the elevador.
- Uh, yes. Yes. They found some evidences I need to run.
- Why do I have the impression you're lying?
- Lying? No. No - Abby felt the need to change the subject since he was starting to mistrust her - So. We hadn't lunch yet. What do you want me to do for dinner?
- Anything. I'm so sick of the hospital soups. Anything better than that is enough for me.
- I'll see what I can do - she said and then they were in front of his door - OH. I just remembered that I forgot something in the car. Here's your key. Go inside while I go there. I'll be right - Abby went to the staircase but never really went down to the parking.
He was surprised how suddenly she ran quickly back there. He could bet it was not what she was going to do at first. He opened the door and the place was dark as it was dusk so he needed to switch on the light. That's what he did and what he saw gave him a fright.
- Surprise! - everyone said. Even Abby who now was behind him.
There was a big banner with the words: "Welcome home Probie". There were also some others decorations too. His apartment looked like a place for parties. In the conter there were some food and drinks. He was staring at all the people he loved. Gibbs, Tony, Ziva, Ducky, Jimmy and even his family.
- I can't believe you totally fooled me Abby. - McGee said when she put on han on his shoulder - I should have seen this coming.
- C'mon McGee. Do you really thought we wouldn't throw a party for you? - Tony asked - We wouldn't be friends if we didn't make this. Let's celebrate having you back.
- It's so good to see all of you here. It means a lot to me to be able to count on you guys. Sarah, Mom and you too Dad. Thank you. Thanks to all of you for this surprise. I loved it.
The apartment looked small for the amount of people that were there. Nobodry seemed to care. Everyone was enjoying this mini party. McGee was surprised at first but after some time he was there talking to everyone and enjoying it as well.
As it was staring to get closer to 9pm they started to leave for their homes. His family was the last one to go. His dad and him talked before at the party and for McGee it was so nice that he doesn't tried to push things, as they had some past issues. He was feeling happy for having all this support and his family around. But all of that didn't make reality seem better. When there were only him and Abby there, it was hard not to remember that.
They had just finished dinner, Mcgee gave her a small smile and guided himself to the bathroom. By now he was almost begging for a nice bath. When he entered there he saw there were new items for wheelchair uses. Just as his apartment had changes with some facilities for him as well. Not longer after he got in Abby came inside.
- What do you think you're doing here alone? - she asked
- I want to take a shower.
- How do you plan moving to the bathtub by yourself?
- I can take care of myself. I'll find a way.
- You need help. That's why I'm here.
- Ok. I take your help. But not now. - McGee said - I don't want to depend on you for everything.
- Look you need help. You can't deny it. Let me help you. Don't worry. It's gonna be like this everyday. But at the beggining you'll need my help. Not only mine but the others too. They will want to help you somehow.
- I swear I can get by on my own - he said but seeing her putting her hand on her waist, he knew it was better not to contradict her - Alright. But Abby this is so embarassing.
- Do you think me helping you with your bath is embarassing? - she asked laughing and with a big smile she said - Well, I'll just call Tony then.
- Please don't make things get worse.
- See. I'm the best option for it. You need help at least on the first days. So you don't need to feel embarassed about it. Besides, I know pretty well what is underneath your clothes. I had already undressed you as well. You have no reason to be embarassed.
- Abby! Stop it. That was so much long ago.
- Relax Timmy. I'll help you with respect. If you want just tell me to close my eyes and I'll do. But you can't do it alone. Because at the end you're not gonna get to do this. And I bet you'll ask for help. It's just waste of time try to do this on your own.
- Ok then. Better you than Tony to help me with this - McGee said - I just remembered that this bathtube fits two people in. Why don't you join me? And I'll stop complaining about how embarassing this is.
- McGee! And I was thinking you hated hospital. Are you trying to get back there? Want me to send you there again? Invitations like that make me wanna put you in bed.
- Since you're already about to give me a bath then it wouldn't be a bad ideia to put me in bed.
- In a hospital bed I mean. Honestly, did they drugged you? Or the medication they gave you is causing some side effects? You look like Tony with this invitation.
- It's just a joke. But seriously I don't see any problem at sharing the bathtube with you.
- Neither do I. But not today. Let's just do it soon. It's almost sleep time - Abby said starting to help him take off his clothes. He could manage to take off the upper body clothes, but the lower body was a problem.
While he took shower Abby was preparing the couch for her to sleep on there. When he was ready he called her and she helped him to get out of the bath, changing clothes and taking him to lie on the bed.
- I guess we're done for today. Time for rest. It has been a long day - Abby said
- Are you sure you want to sleep on the couch?
- That's no problem. It's confortable. So, before I go I just want to know how you're feeling. Are you alright?
- I'm fine Abby. - McGee said. It was a lie because he wasn't ok at all. And he knew by her expression that she didn't believe on it. - Get some rest. Don't worry, I'm fine - he finished trying to give her a smile
- Look I understand you may not want the others to be worried about you - She said walking from the bedroom's door to sit by his side on the bed - I noticed how you smiled to people when asked about how you felt. It's the same you're giving me now. A fake smile. I hate it.
- Sorry. I thought that just like the others you would believe it and let it go.
- The others may have believed but not me. Tim, I can read you without even needing a polygraph machine. So please don't lie to me. - Abby said and lay beside him. She held his face on her hands making sure he was looking into her eyes - You're feeling hurt. And this isn't a question. You know you don't have to hide it from me. After all, I can see it even if you try to hide. You're a strong man but even the strongest ones has their weakness moment.
- Nobody needs to see it. I don't want to get in their way with my problems.
- They care about you. They want your welfare. It's your option if you want them out of it. But you must know I'll insist. Against your will if it's the case. So be honest to me.
- I've always been honest to you. I didn't mean to lie to you a few minutes ago. I just thought you didn't need to know what I'm truly feeling.
- It's worse if you keep it for yourself. Sometimes open up your heart helps. Whenever you need to talk, don't be afraid of showing when you're feeling down.
- It's not a big deal. It's just some scary thoughts running through my mind - McGee said - Nothing worth to talk about this late on night.
- Alright. I don't mind if what you want the others to believe it's not the truth. However, you better not hide things from me. You never succeeds doing it. Sooner or later I'll always know the truth.
- I'll try not to hide it. You don't need to be so worried about me. I'll be alright eventually.
- I know I actually can't promise that since it's not in my hands, but this will work out and everything will be back to normal. I can feel it. I know you'll walk again. It's a long road you have to take but you're not alone. We're in this together - she said and kissed his forehead - Now good night because I'm off to sleep - she was about to get up when he held her arm.
- Stay. - he asked - I don't think you mind us sharing a bed, do you?
- Not at all. But just for tonight.
- Thanks for being here for me.
- You're welcome Tim. Good night.
- Good night Abby - he said and he kissed her cheek before going to sleep.
Even knowing we would probably have some nightmares on his sleep, it didn't teke long for him to fall asleep. He was glad to be home. Despite being a bit upset he knew he was lucky to be alive after all. But he just couldn't get along with his legs problem. He could see this was going to be a tortuous time for him. It could take too long until the day he could walk again. And this is, if he would ever walk again. Even people saying he would, sometimes he doubted.
Abby also didn't take long to fall sleep. But she watched him sleep for a few minutes. She knew that at some point, things could get ugly when for some reason he feel frustated by the progress of the physioterapy. It would take a lot of time and the progress is slow until the results start to appear. And she knew people usually never has enough patience in those situation. She feared a bit what could be his behavior if this happened but she would be there to distract him. She would only leave his side against her will if he asked her to leave. She would give him sometime and then she would go back to help him eventually.
Chapter 6 is up. I did it! In time. I could manage write the chapter within one week even being hard sometimes to write some parts.
I tried to play with a "Zivaism" in there but I'm sorry with it didn't work but I hope you understand.
And I made a little reference to Mr Bean played by Rowan Atkinson. I hope you know what I metioned. It's old but I believe it was funny sometime back then. In case you don't remember, to see the scene search for "Mr Bean driving on roof of car". I can't post links here. Abby's red car (sorry I don't know the name of her car) is small, so if McGee wanted her to use her car then I guess he would only be able to go on the roof.
It's so good after so long to write McGee going back home and feeling better compared with the way he was shortly after the blast. He still have to face his legs' problems but it's so small comparing to almost die.
So this new phase is complicated and as you know it takes time. So I can't write it day by day, or week by week. Otherwise I will never finish this story. So from the next chapter on I'll skip some time as the scenes go on. But you'll know. Counting the blast was in the middle of May then in the next chapter we are about to get to July.
Thanks for the reviews. I hope you like the chapter and let me know what you think about it.