Alec set his cellphone down on his bedside table, feeling a heaviness in his chest. He had lied to Magnus earlier. Phones were allowed at team meetings. Alec just didn't know how to talk to Magnus at the time. Ragnor's words from the other night remained in his mind and were slowly taking over everything. Magnus had been one of the best things that had ever happened to him, he made him feel happy and desirable and not at all like an abomination.

Alec would never want to hurt someone who made him feel all of those things and on top of that was one of the most beautiful people Alec had ever met. No, he was the most beautiful person Alec had ever met. Alec thought of telling him that one day but figured it would be too embarrassing to do so.

So after the meeting, Alec checked his phone one last night, hoping for a text from Magnus for some stupid reason. Finding nothing he fell asleep with that awful feeling in his chest. Needless to say, he didn't sleep well that night.

/ / / /

Alec spent most of the day in a daze, not paying attention at all to what was going on around him. This was completely unusual for Alec as he was a straight-A student who equal parts studious and intelligent. A sharp elbow to the ribs from Jordan Kyle during English class was what finally snapped him out of it.

He glared at his friend and teammate.

"You alright man?"

Alec nodded, rubbing his side and still glaring.

"Yeah, why wouldn't I be?"

Jordan shrugged, which Alec found irritating. He was the one who brought it up, why wouldn't he know the answer to that question.

"Maia said you were out of it today in Chemistry and you haven't heard a word I've said at all. You haven't been going to dinner with Coach and the rest of us. I was just asking."

Alec blinked. He wasn't even sure why he suddenly felt a wave of guilt again as he knew he was about to lie to Jordan. The two weren't particularly close, but they got along well enough.

"Yeah, I'm fine, just stressed."

Jordan snickered.

"What could you possibly be stressed about? You have everything going for you right now."

Alec offered a half smile and shook his head. And maybe that was it, he thought. Maybe he had so much: soccer, friends, family- these things he had his whole life and this one thing that he couldn't change even if he wanted to (he didn't) could rip it all away. And no one seemed to understand how absolutely terrified and alone that made him feel.

/ / / /

Alec's eyes searched across the hallway, looking for a specific person. Catching golden locks and hearing a rather obnoxious laugh, Alec effortlessly found his target (Jace stood out easily among his peers).

"Jace!" Alec yelled, needing to be heard among the loud chatter of the hallway.

Jace turned around at the sound of his name, only a little surprised to see it was Alec who had called him.

"What's up?" Jace asked, as they neared one another.

Alec jerked Jace by the elbow and pulled him into a nearly empty corner of the hall.

"I need you to sneak me out tonight," Alec said in a hushed tone.

Jace pulled back, a sneer on his face.

"Sneaking out to see Magnus again? So soon? Alec don't you know you're supposed at least try to play hard to get. Make him miss you."

Alec narrowed his eyes, not amused by his brother's antics.

Jace raised his hands, "Fine, fine can do. Though I may need some help from Isabelle. There are going to be random room checks tonight."

Alec's eyes widened and he ran a hand through his already mussed up hair.

"Never mind then, I guess I could try tomorrow."

"No you couldn't," Jace interrupted. "You have a long practice and then you guys leave for the tournament."

Alec looked positively crestfallen.

"Which is why you're sneaking out tonight," Jace informed him.

At Jace's words, Alec looked up with confusion.

"Jace, how can you possibly help with this? These checks are random, hence the name random room checks."

"Oh Alec, you truly are too naïve at times. Let me do all the work and you just talk to Maggie Bean about my problem and we'll call it even."

"Don't call him Maggie Bean," Alec hissed, but Jace simply ignored him and walked off.

Alec shook his head and walked to his next class, an uncontrollable smile plastered on his face for the rest of the day.

/ / / /

Alec felt the key in the palm of his hand, twirling it between his fingers, still not quite sure how to feel about possessing a key to his new boyfriend's place. His conversation with Ragnor had made having this object all sorts of confusing. Though to be fair to Ragnor, the man did have a point and he was just looking out for his friend. He had no doubt Isabelle or Jace would do the same for him.

Tossing all doubts aside, Alec tentatively unlocked the door to Magnus' building and headed up the rickety staircase to his boyfriend's loft. He had texted ahead of time to ask Magnus if it was alright if he came over. Magnus had responded with an enthusiastic "of course", which both surprised Alec and yet didn't surprise him at all. Since they had met Magnus had made it clear he wanted to be around Alec as much as possible but the why was what continued to baffle Alec. He wasn't very interesting; especially in comparison the worldly man he was dating.

"Alexander darling," was his greeting as Alec reached his boyfriend's doorway. It was of course already opened and waiting for him. Moments like this warmed Alec's heart in ways he could never explain. It was a tiny gesture that said so much. It said Magnus was as excited and impatient to see Alec as Alec was to see him.

"Hey," Alec said his voice cracking. He wasn't sure why, it hadn't even been two whole days in between them seeing each other.

Magnus greeted him with a sweet kiss, tilting his chin up and forcing their eyes to meet.

"Are you alright? You look tired."

Alec thought about confessing everything right there. He wanted to dump the weight off of his shoulders into Magnus' very capable hands. However upon further inspection of their surroundings, Alec saw they were not alone and this was not the time for that.

"I'm fine. I didn't get much sleep last night."

"Long meeting?" Magnus asked.

"What? Oh yeah, it lasted a long time." Alec lied. It was just easier that way.

Magnus regarded him suspiciously but Alec remained straight faced.

"So, um is this Tessa?" Alec asked, wanting the attention off of himself.

Magnus spared his boyfriend one last concerned glance before turning back to the gray eyed girl behind him.

"Indeed it is," he said, "Tessa, this is Alec, my boyfriend. Alec, this is Tessa a dear friend of mine."

Tessa, who had been busy explain a book in her hand to Ragnor looked up with a kind smile.

"Hello Alec. It's so nice to meet you; Magnus has talked so much about you these past few weeks."

"He has?" Alec asked, disbelieving.

Tessa nodded. Her smile, if possible, seemed even warmer as she observed Alec.

"Is it really that surprising darling? If so then I guess I'll have to do a better job at showing you just how much I like you," Magnus teased, causing Alec's face and neck to warm with a deep blush.

"No, that's not necessary," Alec said in a low voice. Magnus snickered and kissed his boyfriend's cheek.

Ragnor rolled his eyes at the display.

"Quit showing off Magnus, it's unbecoming."

Tessa looked quite surprised at Ragnor's words, Magnus noticed and smirked.

"Have I told you my theory about Ragnor?"

"Not this again," Ragnor groaned which only seemed to encourage Magnus. The banter between the two reminded Alec of himself and his siblings.

Before Magnus could open his mouth to speak, Ragnor cut him off.

"I am not jealous Magnus and your theories of my being in love with you are ridiculous. In fact I don't even think I believe in love at all, especially with how ridiculous it makes one act. Did you see yourself yesterday?"

Magnus 'eyes widened and Ragnor looked immediately regretful.

"Yesterday?" Alec questioned with concern. "What happened yesterday?"

"Nothing darling, I was just a bit . . . worried when you didn't text back," Magnus replied stiffly, glaring at Ragnor as he spoke to Alec.

He was too busy glaring that he didn't notice the look of shame overcome Alec's face. Alec looked to his feet.

"I'm sorry about that," Alec said, truly remorseful.

As he looked up, his eyes met Ragnor's and Alec felt another pang of emotion that he couldn't quite pinpoint. It wasn't good though. It was as if in that very moment Ragnor knew Alec had intentionally avoided texting Magnus all day.

"It's fine sweetie, Ragnor is just being dramatic."

"Yes," Ragnor said, still staring at Alec. "I was simply trying to tease Magnus."

Magnus beamed and looked to his boyfriend, "See? I promise you have nothing to apologize for. Though I may have to apologize for my poor choice in who I let live with me."

Alec snorted and shook his head.

/ / / /

It was nearly three hours later and the couple sat lazily on the couch, limbs tangled together and Magnus twirling random strands of Alec's hair as they watched a movie.

"They didn't leave because of me did they?" Alec finally asked the question that had been bothering him for the past hour and a half.

Magnus stopped twirling Alec's eyes and turned to face him so their eyes locked. Alec shifted a bit uncomfortably but maintained the eye contact. He was never really good at expressing himself.

"Why would you think that?"

Alec shrugged, dropping his head and picking at his fingernails.

"They left right after I got here. I know Tessa's here to visit you, not Ragnor."

"Tessa's an impartial person. She could enjoy spending time with just about anyone. They've been talking about going out since this morning."

"Since I texted you?" Alec asked, looking back up.

Magnus shrugged. "That may have had something to do with it, but not the reasons you're thinking darling. Tessa just thought she'd give us some alone time since she's aware we don't get much. She quite likes you actually."

"Does that bother you?"

"That Tessa likes you? Not at all, she has a fiancé and you'd obvious never be interested."

"Magnus!" Alec said, playfully swatting at his boyfriend.

Magnus smiled.

"Not what you meant?"

Alec shook his head. "You know what I meant."

"Do I wish we could spend more time together? Yes, I quite do because I love spending time with you Alexander. But no, it doesn't bother me. I know what I was getting into when I started dating you and I have no intention of turning back."

Alec was too elated with Magnus' answer to say anything back. In fact it was hard to look at the man without blushing so Alec felt forced to look away, back towards the movie they hadn't really been watching.

Magnus was having none of that and gently grabbed Alec's jaw, turning his face so they were looking at one another again.

"Does it bother you?"

Alec shrugged. "I wish I didn't have to sneak around so much, but I know it's not something I can change."

Magnus nodded, dropping his hand from Alec's face and instead grabbing onto Alec's hand.

"Don't let it bother you. Whatever time we get together is more than enough for me. I mean it."

Alec swallowed; feeling like his heart was in his throat.

"Okay," Alec managed and Magnus smiled.

"Okay." Magnus replied, and turned back to catch the last five minutes of the movie.

/ / / /

"I bet you two can't even tell me the plot of that movie," Ragnor joked as he entered the apartment alongside Tessa, a large bag of books in her hands.

Alec shot up, straightening his shirt and re-buckling his belt, his face hot from his making out with Magnus and from the embarrassment of being caught red-handed. Magnus was much more annoyed than embarrassed and scowled at the TV screen which was playing the DVD Play Menu on loop.

They had tried to turn it off earlier but they had grabbed for the remote control mid make-out, causing the remote to go skidding across the hardwood floor. It was too far away for either to grab for when there was fondling and kissing to be done.

"I thought you were going to text when you were on your way back," Magnus said, obvious frustration in his voice.

Alec looked over at his boyfriend, confused as to why he was so upset with his boyfriend. Sure it was inconvenient timing, but it wasn't as if they had planned it.

However, upon further inspection Alec realized, seeing Magnus' flushed face and the couch pillow in his lap that the frustration was of a different nature. Despite the supreme embarrassment and discomfort, he felt a bit proud he had the ability to do that to Magnus. It was nice to know it wasn't so one-sided.

"We did," Ragnor replied dryly. "It seems you were paying as much attention to your phone as the TV and that's not saying much."

Magnus was about to retort when Alec placed a calming hand on his chest. Magnus looked from Alec's hand to his face, confusion darkening his gaze.

"Ignore him, let's go to bed," Alec whispered as he leaned in and pressed a kiss to his boyfriend's cheek.

Magnus' eyes brightened immediately, and the sight of those cat eyes so light made Alec's heart contract. He really was amazing to look at.

Then, as calmly as he could, Magnus said good night to both Tessa and Ragnor before he pulled Alec into his bedroom and slammed the door shut behind them.