Disclaimer: I don't own FMA or any of the characters, but I do own Sam Mist.

I walked into my room and closed the door behind me. I grabbed my suitcase and headed straight to my bathroom and closed the door quietly behind me. I dropped my suitcase on the floor, it made a thud as it hit the white tiled floor, I leaned up against the door and slid down it and pulled my knees up to my chest as I felt tears stream down my cheeks. I reached for my suitcase and opened it up, inside I saw my sweet release. That perfect little cutting knife that I knew that would help to know that I could feel instead of being numb.

I reached for it and I pulled my right sleeve up. I looked down at the many scars that I had put upon myself, searching for a new place where I could destroy my pale skin. Once I found the spot I drug the knife against my skin, I moaned in pure pleasure at the feeling of the knife cutting into my skin. It was so wonderful. I watched the blood run out of my new cut, as I felt more tears run down my face. I looked up at the ceiling as I made my arms and legs go limp. I closed my eyes, still feeling tears flow from my eyes, as the memory of what happened in the colonel's office came flooding back into my mind

We reached his office and he opened the door for me like any gentleman would, but I had a feeling that something bad was going to happen. I stepped inside his office and he must have followed after me, because I heard the door close and I thought I heard the door lock. Before I knew it the colonel had spun me around and was holding me in a tight embrace.

"I don't think I've told you this yet, Sam," he whispered in my ear, it sent a sickening shiver up and down my spine. "But I love goth girls. Do you want to know why?"

"Why," I asked before realizing it.

"I love them, because there's a sense of danger and rebelliousness about them that turns me on," he whispered again in my ear, in the most sickening voice.

He pulled me closer and I could feel a bulge rub against my leg. The colonel moaned softly in my ear. My eyes grew wide with realization as to what that bulge was. I felt warm lips touch the side of my neck, I gasped in surprise. I tried to get away from him, but his grip on me only tightened. My hands were at my sides so I couldn't move my arms. I stepped on his foot to see if he would let go. Instead he bit my neck, I cringed in pain. I could feel him start to move me towards the couch. Once we reached the couch he pushed me down onto my back. I quickly tried to get up but he quickly straddled my hips. He grabbed my hands and put them above my head. He held them with his left hand, and cupped my cheek with the other.

"You look so beautiful like this, you know?" he whispered. "I bet you'll look even more beautiful when you're covered in sweat and moaning my name," he said, huskily, with a smug smirk on his face.

"In you're dreams, you sick prick of a bastard!" I growled at him.

"Oh, come now, Sam. Don't you want to know what it feels like to have me in side of you? Me thrusting my thick, long, cock up inside of you hitting that special spot that makes you quake. And after hitting that spot so many times you scream out my name as you reach the overwhelming orgasmic pleasure. The many other women I've been with have told me that it feels…wonderful." He breathed in my ear. He moved his hand away from my cheek and he snaked it up under my shirt. He lifted up my bra and grabbed my breast.

I gasped and glared up at his stupid smug face, as he played with my nipple. I tried to scream but he captured my lips with his. I opened my mouth letting his tongue relish the taste of my mouth before biting down hard onto his tongue. He let go of my hands and covered his mouth. I punched him in the face and pushed him off of me onto the floor. I got up from the couch and clapped my hands before touching the doorknob to make the door unlock. I fixed my bra real quick before running out of the room and I stormed towards the Elric's apartment.

I heard a knock at the bathroom door and my eyes fluttered open.

"Sam, are you ok? You've been in there for about twenty minutes now." I heard Edward's sweet voice ask.

I wiped my eyes before replying, with a halfhearted giggle, "Yeah, I'm fine I guess I just fell asleep on the bathroom floor without realizing it."

There was no reply after awhile, before I heard him ask, "Sam, can I come in?"

My eyes grew wide; there was blood on the floor, blood on my arm, and blood on the knife. "Sure, but could you give me a minute?" I asked, reluctantly.

"Sure, I'll be sitting on your bed, ok?"

I nodded before saying "ok" back. I quickly opened up the cupboard underneath the sink and put my suitcase and the knife in there. I closed the cupboard and stood up and grabbed a washcloth and turned the faucet on letting it get drenched with water, before turning off the faucet and cleaning my wound. Once it was clean I got down on my hands and knees and cleaned the blood up off the floor. I made sure there was not a spec of blood before throwing the washcloth in the cupboard. I pulled my sleeve back down and walked out of the bathroom, to see Edward sitting on my bed like promised.

He looked so handsome with the light from the window shining on his beautifully tan face. The light made his beautiful golden eyes sparkle along with his hair. I sat down beside him, wishing I could run my fingers through his soft golden locks. "So what do you want to talk about?"

His amber eyes held so much strength as he looked at me. "I wanted to tell you that if there's anything you ever want to talk about then you can talk to me or Al. We won't judge you, we're your friends, we're here to help," he said with so much confidence that it kind of astounded me. He was also being so kind, it almost brought me to tears, but not tears of sadness, but tears of happiness.

I could feel my eyes start to water with joy. "Thank you, Edward," I said joyfully, as I pulled him into a warm embrace. I felt the tears stream down my face, as I buried my face into his shoulder. I felt him return the embrace and held me tight in a comforting manner. He was so warm and gentle; the feeling of me being held in his arms was wonderful. It felt like I was meant to be held like this forever, by him. I felt a strange sensation in the pit of my stomach. It was like how you feel when you're really happy to be with someone that you care about. Does this feeling I have mean that I like Edward more than a friend? Could this mean that I love him?

I pulled away from the embrace and looked into those beautiful golden orbs of his, and he looked into my gray-blue ones. It seemed like our faces were inching closer and closer, our eyes never leaving one another's. Our faces were so close, that I could feel his warm breath caress my lips. We hesitated, and then finally our lips met. I closed my eyes relishing the moment. His lips were so soft. I felt his tongue caress my bottom lip. I was scared I didn't know what to do, so I just opened my mouth and let his tongue explore mine. I moaned from the sensations that he was causing my body to feel.

"Brother, Sam." Our lips parted and a deep blush spread across my pale cheeks. "Is everything all right, you've been in there for awhile now," Alphonse said with worry.

I didn't know what to do so I just looked down at my hands. "Yeah, Al. Everything's alright." Ed responded back.

We heard Al's footsteps fade away, telling us that he had walked away from my door. I could feel Ed's gaze turn back to me. I felt his soft lips kiss the top of my head before saying, "I'm sorry about that. I guess it was just a in the moment kind of thing," he said, with concern heavy in his voice.
I looked up at him, "No, it's ok. Besides…I…liked it." His eyes seemed to grow big, but then they calmed down. Probably because he saw the blush on my face.

Then the cutest thing happened, a deep pink blush spread across his face too. "Well, the truth is…I …liked it…too."

A small smile graced my lips. "Well since we both liked it…can we…do it…again?" I asked, nervously.

I saw him smile a warm smile that made my heart flutter. He reached his hand behind my head and pulled me into a passionate kiss. This one felt even better than the one before. It felt so nice to be kissed by him. I grew bolder, and this time I licked his bottom lip, asking for entrance. He gladly accepted. Our tongues relishing each others mouths, as if we were trying to memorize each other's tastes. As if we were tying to memorize every crevice, every bump, Hell, even every taste bud.

Slowly I could feel him start to lower me onto my back. I couldn't help but panic. I pushed him away. He looked at me with worry stained eyes."Sam, are you ok? Did I do something wrong?"

I wanted to tell him that I thought he was the colonel, and that he was trying to rape me, but I didn't want him to worry any further. "No, no, that's not it at all. I just want to go slower." He looked at me like I had two heads. Then he made me worry, he started laughing.

"Sam, I was never even thinking about going past kissing. Do you want to know why?"

I nodded my head and responded, "Why?"

"Because I'm not ready to do that kind of thing yet."

I started laughing at my own stupidity. "Well that's good, because I'm not ready either."

We laughed for a little while before Edward said, "Well then it's settled, we won't go any further than kissing until we're sure we're both ready."

"Ok, that's a promise." We sealed the promise with a chaste kiss. We pulled away and he wiped the tears from my cheeks with his thumbs. He kissed the top of my forehead before getting up and walking towards the door.

He looked back at me before saying, "Oh, and by the way, I ate all the cake."

He ran out the door with me chasing in pursuit, yelling, "Edward!"

Later that night after I gave Edward a mega wedgy for lying to me about eating all the cake. I was standing in my shower looking down at my scarred arms, letting the warm water cascade down my pale body. I wondered how long it would take until Edward and Alphonse found out about my cutting addiction. I wondered if they would hate me or just kick me out or even shun me. I could feel the tears well up in my eyes again. How many times had I cried that day, I wondered.

Damn it, I didn't want to cry. It shows that I'm weak; I don't want to be weak. I…damn it, why am I thinking about this? I should be happy, I have my very first official boyfriend, but why do I still feel so lonely? I have Ed and Al as a family now, and yet I still feel so empty inside. I turned off the shower and stepped out, I wrapped a towel around me and I walked back into my room. I put on my black long-sleeved shirt that I always wear at night and my black boxer type shorts. I clapped my hands and touched my hair making it automatically dry. I crawled under the covers and let the sweet feeling of sleep over take me.

I looked around me and saw nothing but total darkness. I looked down at myself and saw that I looked like how I looked when I was ten-years-old. I heard a shrill scream and I ran towards it with out even thinking. I heard the same scream repeatedly. As I neared where I heard the scream come from, I could see from where I was standing, which was five feet away, a man standing over a lifeless form. The man looked my way. My eyes grew wide, the man was my… "Father…" I whispered.

A devilish grin grew on his face. He held up a bloodied knife, I looked back at the lifeless form beside him, I looked at it more closely this time, I gasped, it was…"Mom." I busted down crying at the realization as to what I was dreaming. I buried my face in my hands as I sobbed. I heard fast footsteps coming; I looked up to see my father running at me, knife ready to stab me. I closed my eyes once again, and put my arms over my face protectively. I could feel his presence coming closer towards me. I braced myself for the feeling of having a knife being stabbed through my chest. I waited a few seconds, I didn't feel anything, no pain in my chest, no warm liquid pouring out of me, nothing, not a single thing. I opened my eyes and looked up to see…"Colonel?" I questioned. I looked at him closely, I could see lust heavy in his eyes, he licked his lips, which made me shiver with disgust.

I tried to get up and move away, but my arms and legs were strapped down. I looked up at my arms to see that they were secured with chains. I noticed that I couldn't see my sleeves, I looked down at myself to see that I was totally nude, and that I was back to my present age, in front of the man that had been trying to rape me for a little while now. I started blushing furiously, I started thrashing around desperately trying to get out of my restraints. My thrashing was useless, the restraints wouldn't brake.

"Thrash around all you want, but you'll never be able to get away." He got on his knees in between my legs. He unzipped his pants and pulled out his enlarged erection. He opened my mouth and stuck his tongue down my throat, making me gag. He kissed my fore head then my cheek before he whispered in my ear, "I love that you look so vulnerable like this I should have done this before." I felt a sharp pain in my lower regions, a loud moan escaped the man's lips. "Oh my God Sam you're so wonderfully tight." He moaned in ecstasy, as he thrust into my virgin entrance. The pain was so unbearable that I couldn't help but scream.

I woke up in a cold sweat, tears streaming down my face, screaming my lungs out. Edward and Alphonse busted down my door, both in fighting ready positions. Ed was wearing the same black boxers that I had seen him in this morning, and his beautiful blonde locks were set free from it's usual braid. Al, of course, was still in his suit of armor.

"Sam, are you alright?" Edward asked as he walked over to me, after he noted that there was no one in the room other than the three of us. He sat down on the bed beside me, and pulled me into a comforting embrace. I couldn't stop myself, I busted down crying in his comforting, strong arms. I could hear Al leave the room. I felt Ed kiss the top of my head and whisper, "It's ok, whatever it is, it'll be ok."

"No…it…isn't…Ed. It'll…never…be…ok." I sobbed into his strong, warm shoulder.

"Yes it will. I'm here now, you don't have to worry." It was quiet for a moment, other than the sobs and hick ups that escaped my lips, before he asked, "Would you like me to stay in here with you until you fall asleep?" He kissed the top of my head again. I nodded my head. I could feel him lie down, pulling me down with him. I immediately cuddled up to him, he pulled the covers up over us, and I could feel the sweet release of sleep over take me. Not having a single dream about my past, or the colonel.

I felt a nice warmth lying near me I couldn't help but cuddle closer to it. I opened my eyes and looked up to see two beautiful golden orbs staring back at me. I could feel my cheeks blush furiously. Edward smirked at me before saying, "You know, you look very cute when you blush," he kissed my forehead.

I blushed an even darker red, if that was even possible, and buried my face into his strong and well defined pectoral muscle. "I thought that you were going to leave my room once I fell asleep. Why were you sleeping in my bed with me?" I mumbled into his warm flesh.

"Well, I guess I got a little too comfortable and I accidentally fell asleep," he said as I could sense him smiling that warm smile that will always make my heart flutter. "But don't worry I didn't take advantage of you, I promise," he said, trying to make sure that I understood that he didn't do anything to me in such a vulnerable state.

I couldn't help but unburying my face and gave him a chaste kiss on the lips for caring about me. When I pulled away I went back to cuddling up to him. I closed my eyes and inhaled his sweet scent, he smelled of iron and some fragrance that I couldn't quite figure out what it was. "Are you smelling me?" he asked.

I couldn't help but smirk as I looked up at him, "And what if I am?"

He smirked back at me, "Then I guess I'm going to have to do this-" he started to tickle me under my armpits. I couldn't help but close my eyes and start laughing.

"Stop…that…tickles," I said between laughs.

He rolled out from under me and knelt beside me, still tickling me. "What do you say?" he asked devilishly.

"Please…stop," I said still giggling.

"Mmmmm…no."

All of a sudden I could feel something heavy onto top of my waist, and the tickling stopped. I opened my eyes to see Edward straddling me, our faces so close to one another's. Our lips crashed together instantaneously in a heated kiss. My eyes fluttered close once again. His lips were so warm and soft, it almost made me melt. I wrapped my arms around his neck to pull him closer to me. I love that feeling of him over me, kissing me so deeply. I ran my fingers through the beautifully soft blonde hair. Our lips parted from each other's for some much need air, both of us gasping. I looked up at him to see those beautiful golden locks flowing off his shoulders like a beautiful gold waterfall. I ran my fingers through it ever so lovingly.

"You know, Ed," I said, a little breathless. "I think I like your hair down a lot more, than having it in a braid. It makes you look a lot…sexier," I whispered huskily.

An adorable blush spread across his tan cheeks. I pulled him back into the kiss and I loved every second of it, until we both heard someone clear their throat. Edward immediately got off of me and I immediately sat up. There in the doorway of my bedroom stood the colonel, leaning up against the doorframe smirking his ass off. I couldn't help but remember my dream last night. I quickly grabbed a hold of Ed's auto-mail arm without thinking.

"Well, well, Fullmetal, I see that you have been doing naughty things to our dear little Sam here," he said, sounding quite amused.

"Fuck you, bastard, besides what the Hell are you doing here anyway?" Ed about screamed his head off, while he was blushing furiously.

"Well I thought I'd stop by to tell Sam something about the exams, but I couldn't help but watch the very interesting show that you two were putting on." He started chuckling at his own words.

I couldn't help but blush furiously, "How much did you see?" I asked timidly.

"Oh, I'd say from when Fullmetal straddled you to well…I think you get the idea, but I don't think Fullmetal looks sexy at all with his hair down. I think it makes him look more like a transvestite," he said with a smirk.

"Fuck you, bastard! I do not look like a transvestite!"

"Colonel, you said you wanted to tell me some thing, what was it?" I asked interrupting their little quarrel.

He looked back at me with a gaze that gave me an uneasy feeling. "Right, I wanted to tell you that the next part of the exams you'll have to answer questions about alchemy on a written test. I will, once again, be a supervisor a long with the Fuhrer and General Hakuro and Basque Grand. There will be others in the room taking the same test. You have to get 90% of the test right to go on to the practical skills exam. If you do make it to the finals, now I have to warn you, but only one person from the finals will become a state alchemist."

I got a sick feeling in my stomach, I couldn't help but squeeze Ed's arm a little tighter.

Ed looked back at me, "You'll do fine, Sam, I'm sure of it," he said before he kissed the top of my head, making me blush.

Al appeared behind the colonel, "Oh good you two are awake," he said excitedly. "Breakfast is ready."

"Ok, Al, we'll be out in a minute," Ed replied. Al left to go God knows where.

"Anyway, I'd better get going, I have to help set some things up. Fullmetal, I trust that you'll show Sam where to go for the exams," the colonel said. I looked over at Ed as he nodded his head. "I'll see you later, Sam, and good luck," the colonel said as he waved goodbye.

I said goodbye in response as he closed the door to my room, leaving Edward and I alone. "Sam," I looked over at Ed, " you can let go of my arm now."

A deep blush spread across my face, "Sorry," I said earnestly.

"Sam?" He asked, after a few moments of silence, concern heavy in his voice, as he looked at me.

"Yes?"

"Why did you grab onto my arm when the bastard was in here?" I could see worry deep within his eyes.

"I don't know. Reflex, I guess," I said a little worried that he wouldn't believe me.

"Sam, don't lie to me. I can tell that it's something else," he said, sounding a little disappointed in me.

"I can't tell you," I said, deeply hoping that he wouldn't try to get involved with what was going on between the colonel and I.

"Why not?" he asked.

"At least not yet, I will when I'm ready." He looked down at his hands, as if he was saying that he felt like he was out of the loop. "I promise, Ed, I'll tell you when I'm ready."

He looked back up at me before saying, "Ok." He kissed the top of my head and I kissed his, before we both went to get breakfast and get ready for the day.

In the next chapter it's going to be a time warp, the reason why there's a time warp is because I don't know what I should write for when Sam takes the other two parts of the exams, and plus I really, really, and I mean really, want to write the lemon between Ed and Sam. Anyway R&R and remember the more you review the faster I update ;)