I have been very busy with my writing lately, but I have finally edited the next chapter of this story. I want to thank everyone who has stuck by me, and to those who have read my other stories, to know that I will be replying soon. I've been dying to get this out there, so it's been a bit of a whirlwind. But I will thank all of you!

I'd also like to extend a special thanks to the anonymous reviewers who have been leaving so many reviews recently. I really appreciate knowing what you all think of my work, and I'm glad you take the time to comment.

Signed reviewers, I love you bunches too, but I can tell you so in a pm.

And as a bit of self-plugging that I hope you all can stand, I would appreciate it that if anyone has the time to check out my one-shots Shaken Sangfroid and Avoidance. Thank you for even listening to me though!

Sorry for the rather long note. Please enjoy the next chapter, and thank you to all who read, comment, review, favorite, alert, etc.

Hope sighs and leans against his own couch, mind buzzing from the other night. His eyes are tired and burn, dark, purple rings stamped beneath them. Last night he succeeded in memorizing the ceiling tiles of Serah's bedroom, 482, counting to one thousand three times, five hundred five times, and to one hundred too many times. Because every light touch, breath near his neck, or slightest shift in the bed had made his heart skip and it really was impossible to get any sleep at all.

And the second light hit and he was sure she wouldn't wake, he'd beat feet to his own house. He still shudders at how he must have looked, running out of Serah's house while hastily throwing his shoes on.

Rubbing at his eyes, he leans over and pulls a textbook toward him. He reads the words, but the letters blur and mash together on the page. Hope's already halfway down the page when he realizes he has no clue what subject the book is on, let alone what he's just read. The clock chimes noon and he glances at his phone, wondering why Serah hasn't texted, called, or beat down his door.

Maybe she was lying when she said she wasn't mad? No...no, she was too serious. Something came up? Or maybe she remembered everything about last night.

Everything.

I'm not sure I'd be able to call her either, now that I think about it.

Knocking at his door startles him and he coughs in a yelp, shoving his textbook into the couch and rushing for the door. Taking several deep breaths and smoothing his unruly hair, he opens the door.

"Hey, Serah. I was wondering if you-" Hope's mouth stops mid-sentence, hanging open as cold, icy death looms over his shoulder.

Lightning Farron stands at his door.

It was a nice life, I suppose. I have a lot of good memories. Dying young isn't so bad either.

"Hope, stop with that look. I'm not going to kill you." Lightning's eyebrows twitch at the insinuation and Hope flushes. He barely meets her cool blue eyes, a stark contrast to the warm oceans he'd been spending so much time with. The whisper of longing that starts in the back of his mind is drowned by the oncoming storm of fear.

"N-no! Of course you wouldn't." Until you heard about what happened last night.

"Can I come in, or do you want to have this conversation at your doorstop?" Hope jumps and looks at his house, then Lightning, his house, Lightning, his house-

"Hope, please. No panic attacks. I really won't hurt you." Her fingers find his head and she ruffles his hair, smiling. "I just want to talk." The storm dims and he briefly closes his eyes at the contact.

Swallowing down a growing lump, he nods and smiles, leading her inside. "Of course, Light." He steps aside, heart pounding as she surveys his living room. His coat lays strewn across the beige carpet, his wallet several feet away. Papers from school litter the lone two-seater couch in the room, and the coffee table in front of it holds empty pop cans, pencils, wads of tissues, and a wide assortment of other junk.

In other words, Hope was not expecting Lightning's company.

"I guess you're fine with Serah seeing this," Lightning quips, smirking. "But from how pale you've gotten, not me?"

Hope shakes his head, unsure of which answer would offend her more. He reaches for the safest thought, rushing it out, "N-no! It's just-I've been so busy studying and-and hanging out that it's just been hard to sort of keep up with it all."

Lightning's eyes soften. "Relax, Hope. Let's sit." She grabs his arm and leads him to his own couch, raising an eyebrow at how stiff he is. She runs a hand through her hair, looking at the table. "I guess I can understand why you're like this. Our last meeting didn't go so well. And work has been...well, an excuse not to see you, more than anything."

Hope's eyes darken and he looks at his feet, nodding. "I-I'm sorry. I shouldn't have just blurted something like that out." He doesn't notice her wring her hands, his own heart growing heavy in his chest.

"And I'm sorry for how I handled it." He feels her eyes on him but cannot bring himself to look up. He clenches his hands in his lap, flinching when she grabs his chin and pulls his face up. "Look at me." She releases him, taking a deep breath when his eyes remain on her. "I spoke with my sister over the last few days. And I thought it over."

She pauses, the slight delay making Hope';s heart tighten and brace for impact. His breath catches and he barely notices his lungs stop. "And, Hope, I do not feel that sort of love for you."

Hope's balled up heart sinks, although he figured these were always her feelings on the matter. He cannot stop his shoulders from sagging, but she continues, grabbing his hand.

"But do not think I don't love you to death. Maybe not the way you want, but you need to know-" She squeezes his hand and he looks into her eyes. Bright blue eyes, both hard and soft and lined with battles and loss. Choppy waves of blue, but no longer the raging hurricane he'd seen when he was younger. "I would give my life for yours. There is no question about that. Clear?"

Warmth tingles down his chest, his heart loosening somewhat. "I know, Light. I know."

They fall into silence, holding hands and breathing together. The clock ticks on and after a while, Lightning speaks again. "I still have to thank you for what you've done for my sister too. You've helped her in ways I couldn't. She's sounded much happier these last few days than she has in months."

"Aw, it's not like it's no fun or something. Don't thank me for something I would have done anyway!" Hope rolls his eyes, ducking when Lightning goes to smack his head. "Don't be mean! Seriously, don't thank me either. It makes it sound like a chore, and it's not!"

Lightning blinks at his darkened cheeks. "I see..."

Hope bites his lip, looking away. "Um...anything else? Or should I make lunch for us-"

"Yes. Work is moving. I'm being positioned in the field in two weeks." Lightning's words stop Hope dead. She lowers her eyes. "I don't know for how long, but it'll be for at least a month. Probably more. I have to oversee the safety of the projects occurring down south of Gran Pulse."

"Lightning," Hope says, eyes searching hers. "I didn't know..." He gapes, trying to find the right words.

Lightning doesn't give him the chance.

"And, in one week, Snow will be coming home. It's a short visit. We're being sent to the same area, so he used my deployment as an excuse to bring himself and his friends here. They're supposed to be my 'escort' or something." She rolls her eyes at the very thought, although her gaze slips back to Hope.

"Serah just heard from Snow as well, so that's why she hasn't talked to you yet. She has to start all these plans to make sure everything is ready for Snow's visit."

Hope's face tightens with each word and his eyes grow as dark as his cheeks. Lightning easily follows the subtle changes, heart clenching when she sees Hope's tranquil fury flash in his face. She sighs, looking toward the ceiling.

"You went to visit her?" Hope asks, voice calm. "Probably to tell her you'd be leaving, huh?"

"Yeah. And to talk." Lightning shrugs, watching Hope from the corner of her eye. "About you and how she has been. About this trip out to Pulse. About Snow." Lightning narrows her eyes. "We talked a lot about Snow."

Hope nods but says nothing. He's managed to relax his face now. His eyes swirl with emotion, the only sign that he is reacting at all, and Lightning watches from the corner of her eye. She inches toward him on the couch and grabs his hand again, smiling when he grasps back. "You're pretty angry, aren't you?"

"After everything that's happened, how couldn't I be?" Hope stares at the floor, tapping his foot. "He's left her alone for so long, and now she's-she's so lonely. And the more I hang out with her, the more obvious it is. She still hasn't talked to him about it either, and I don't know what else I'm supposed to do."

Lightning nods as he speaks, her own chest roaring at Snow's neglect. "I know, Hope. I know how you feel. And trust me, I will talk to him myself. But there's one thing that you have to understand." Hope glances at her, tilting his head. "Even if we want to help her, help either of them, there are some things we're not going to be able to change."

She takes a deep breath, avoiding Hope's blank stare. "We can talk to them until we're all blue in the face, but this is still their marriage. It's still their lives. And if they're not willing to talk to each other, or fix what's going on...then that's it."

"But, Lightning, Serah's so-so down right now. We can't let her just-"

"Hope," she grinds out. He snaps his jaw shut and Lightning eases, shaking her head. "I know. I know that. And don't think I don't want to kick Snow's ass from here to the other side of Pulse, or really let Serah have it for being so passive about all of this. But it is still her life. And I..." Her voice trails and she is silent for so long that Hope wonders if she's lost the thought. Then she let's out a short breath and rises, fisting her hands.

"I won't stand in the way. I'm not going to make the same mistakes again." Her eyes are half-lidded and there's a sag in her shoulders that wasn't there before. The air shifts. Her mouth parts in a silent sigh. "After everything that's happened, all I can do is let her live her life the way she wants to. And be there for her for every step. Every mistake."

She turns to him and holds his eyes, squaring herself. "That's all either of us can do."

Hope blinks. Blinks again. Lowers his eyes to the floor. "Right."

Silence falls again, although it's far stiffer now. Lightning turns to Hope when he stands, watching as he grabs his coat from the floor and pulls it on. "Hope, what are you doing?"

"Well, if all I can do is be with there for her, I'll need to get started, won't I? And winter is coming up fast, so any work she has around the house needs to get done fast. Didn't you freeze your butt off out there?" He grins, rolling his shoulders. "I bet she's swamped right now anyway, so I'd figure I could help her with some of that work. What do you think?"

Lightning gives him a small smile, following him toward the door. "I think she'd appreciate that, Hope." She chuckles when he opens the door and swears, a blast of cold air blasting his face. Hope shudders and shakes himself, rubbing his numbed cheek.

"I hate this weather. I hate this weather. I hate this weather."

He jumps when she grabs him by the shoulders and turns him around. Her eyes are warm and his heart clenches. She kisses him on the forehead before heading out the door, calling over her shoulder, "Hope, don't ever change."

"How many bones are humans born with, on average?" Serah asks, textbook in one hand and feather duster in the other. She walks to the kitchen, waiting for Hope's answer as he scrubs her sink.

"Three hundred to three hundred and fifty bones."

"Correct!" She swipes the duster at the top of her fridge, sending particles raining down on her. Wrinkling her nose, she asks, "And the average adult?"

Hope pauses at the sink, wiping his forehead. "Um...two hundred and eight."

"Close...two hundred and six."

Hope grumbles, starting the water and scrubbing anew before setting the rag down and reaching for his orange juice on the counter. Serah narrows her eyes at the sweat beading down his neck. Leaning against the fridge, she raises an eyebrow at him. "Maybe we should take a break. I mean, we've been at this since you got out of class." She glances at the clock, eyes popping. "And it's already five! You got out at-at eleven, Hope!"

"Yeah, but look at all the progress we made!" He waves his hands around the kitchen, grinning broadly. "Got all the kitchen done." He steps toward her and snatches the duster from her hand, wiping down the rest of the fridge before handing it back to her. "Half the living room, most of the backyard. We're doing great."

"You also have the exam in two days! You should be studying for that, not helping me here."

"But, I like helping you, Serah." He says it so simply that Serah blushes, looking away from his smile. "I mean, after all the help you've given me, it's the least I could do."

"You helped me too..." she whispers.

Hope pauses, leaning down to try and catch a glimpse of her eyes. She pushes her back to the fridge when he steps even closer, his breath hitting her face. Heart skipping, she looks at him from between her bangs, swallowing at his intense look.

"Hope."

"I want to help you, Serah. Not just because I want to pay you back, but because I'm worried about you." Something flashes in his eyes that sends her heart clawing to her mouth. Her breath quickens and Hope's cheeks flush. She watches his Adam's apple bob and his eyes flicker away. "I want you to promise...promise you'll talk to him. Or something." His eyebrows knit together before he forces his face to relax. "Nothing will change if you don't talk to him."

He steps away from her, and just like that the moment is broken. Ignoring the pulsations her heart causes in her throat, she nods and rubs at her neck. "O-okay then."

"So...how about I take care of your gutters before we rest?" Serah's eyes bulge at the suggestion. Hope is out the door before she utters a word, and she rolls her eyes. He always disappears before actually getting an answer!

"Hope, no!" She marches after him, slamming the door behind her. Body tensing at the cold breeze, she whips her head around, trying to spot him. "How does he get around so fast?" Shaking her head, she starts for her backyard. As he strolls out of her small white shed, carrying a ladder in his arms, a twitch begins to develop in her right eye.

"Hope, no. We are not cleaning the gutters today. We aren't cleaning them tomorrow. We are not cleaning the gutters ever!" She stomps her foot but Hope hums and walks right past her, leaning the ladder against her house. "Are you even listening to me? It's too dangerous. I don't even like Snow doing it."

"I am listening to you. But if you don't clean it out now, all the gunk and leaves are going to get frozen in there. And if there's too much, the gutters can break and collapse." He climbs the ladder and bounces his weight on the wood, much to Serah's horror. Eyes widening further, she presses a hand to her fluttering chest.

"What are you doing?"

"Checking to see if it's secure." He hops down once satisfied, trotting back to the shed. "Saw some gloves. Be right back."

Slamming her hand to her forehead as he leaves, she goes for the ladder. She glares at it, hissing and knocking it from the house. "We. Are. Not. Doing. This."

"Aw, Serah, I had it secure." She slowly turns to face him, the twitch spreading to both eyes. Hope slips on the too large gloves, curling his fingers and grinning. "Well, it wasn't that hard to set. I'll just do it again."

"You will do no such thing! You are on my property, and you will do as I say. And I say, we are not cleaning out the gutters!"

"Of course we aren't, Serah." Serah's chest loosens and Hope picks up the ladder. "I'm cleaning out the gutters."

"That's not what I meant and you know it, Estheim." He pauses a bit at the use of his last name, tilting his head. He bites his lip and Serah feels a surge of satisfaction.

Got you now.

"Please, Serah?" Hope turns to her, jutting out his lower lip and clasping his hands in mock prayer. "Please, let me do this for you! I just want to help and it really is important. It's the very last thing I'll do today, I swear. And I won't work tomorrow if it bothers you too much. Please?" Her mouth drops when he even manages to make his eyes shimmer. She can feel her resolve weakening and kicks against it.

"No. Absolutely not."

"They could collapse in the winter."

"I'd rather have broken gutters than a broken Hope." Hope's cheeks darken at that, but he steps closer to her. Serah blinks when he pulls her into a hug. "Hope?"

"Just trust me. I will not get hurt. Not here. Not in front of you." His voice is so strong, so sure, that she finds herself nodding despite herself. He pulls away from her, eyes light and grinning from ear to ear. Serah's breath hitches at the sight, and Hope's eyes linger on her seconds longer than they should.

She cannot explain the rush of excitement when she notices this.

Minutes later he is on her roof, throwing down old mud and leaves, Oh, God, I think that was a bird.

Said bird joins the growing pile of junk and sludge as Hope works hard along the gutter. At one point he smiles down at her and asks in as sweet a voice he can muster, "Do you think you can ask me some questions for the exam, too? Two birds, one-"

"No." Flat-out refusal makes his face drop.

"Bu-but why not?"

Serah narrows her eyes. "Because I may have let you up there, but I will not have you doing anything else. No distractions. Not even for that exam."

"But it's coming up so fast," he says. His voice rises in pitch, achieving a whine Serah didn't know was possible for someone his age. The way he bites his lips moments after suggests he didn't know he could make that sound either, and he silently returns to clearing out the mud before him.

Serah follows him around the house, wincing at every slight slip and holding her breath when he is out of sight. Although she is shivering, Hope eventually abandons his shirt to the ground, shouting that it's old anyway when Serah shouts at him. She eyes his back for any hints of exhaustion or pain, stepping as close as she can without getting hit with oncoming gunk.

Trace scars run down the right side of his back, as well as one on the lower left. The skin is reddening from the work, sweat beading down and disappearing into now ruined sweat pants. Serah takes several steps ahead of him, watching him dig into the gutter with concentration. His movements across the roof are careful, and she's glad for it.

Her gaze lingers on his face, but soon she finds her eyes heading for his torso. While by now means a large man, training under Lightning has kept Hope strong, fit, and lean. His abdomen is tightly muscled, moving in tandem with the rest of his body as he shifts, grunts, and heaves. Sweat drips down his chest as well, her eyes lingering on his ni-

No, no, no, no, no, no! Bad thoughts, Serah. Absolutely...bad...

Hope grunts again, pausing to arch his back. He cracks his neck for good measure, and Serah squashes, strangles, and absolutely murders thoughts of, Hot. Gorgeous. That man can bend.

At least, that's what she tells herself, even as the sinful musings whisper lowly in her ear. She shakes her head, her entire face burning bright at the persisting, corrupting thoughts. I'm married! Married! No looking, no ogling, and no, no thoughts like that.

"Serah? Serah, what's wrong?" Hope's voice shakes her from her reverie. "You all right? Maybe you've been out in the cold too long, your face is turning red."

"Um-Uh-Yeah! That must be it. I think I'll go inside and get you something to drink. No working until I get back though." She jabs a finger at him and he nods, smiling a bit.

"I won't. Worrywart."

"Hmph." She puts her hands on her hips and marches herself back inside, relishing in Hope's chuckles.

And groaning once she's in the house.

"This is going to be a long, long evening."

"I failed the exam."

Hope feels Serah touch his arm as he slams his forehead on the wooden library table. Shushing from the front can be heard, but Hope just shakes his head. "I failed the exam. I must have. It's the only explanation for how horrible I'm feeling. I failed. I failed."

"Hope, you did not fail. You are what most people call tired. That happens when you help a woman clean her house from top to bottom while studying your brains out. I'm sure you did fine." Serah bites her lip when Hope keeps mumbling 'failure' under his breath. She glances around at the bookcases, thoughts scrambling for what to do.

"I bet you'd feel better if we checked the answers! Let's go find-"

"No. No, please. If I never have to see another anatomy book of any kind..."

Serah sighs, pinching the bridge of her nose. "Then maybe we should go out for coffee."

Hope chuckles and Serah's heart lifts at the noise. "I feel more like passing out than trying to stay awake. I was up cramming and drinking soda, and cramming some more."

"I know! I actually had to come over and make you fall asleep," Serah says, disapproval in her voice. She gives him a reproachful look, swatting his arm. "You know better than that. Haven't I told you a thousand times that you remember things better when you get a full night of sleep?"

"Yes," Hope moans, pouting.

"Then sleep next time!" Her brow worries when he only nods, and she pulls him up from his seat. "Come on, don't just sit there. How about actually showing me around or something?"

Hope blinks, tilting his head to the side before giving her a slow nod. He grabs her hand and starts to lead her down some of the stacks of books. Serah's eyes rove the passing titles, her heart leaping or sinking with each one she reads. Her hand itches to pull several of them down from the shelves and hurry to one of the cushions placed in the center of the room, but Hope just tugs her along.

"Where are we going, Hope?" She pulls at his grip, jutting her lower lip out when he doesn't let go.

"You're the one who told me to show you around." He smiles at her, ducking when she tries to smack him again.

"Yeah, but now you-"

"Shhhh." The librarian gives them a hard look, his eyes turning to steel behind his glasses. Hope waves at the man before taking Serah and ducking behind one of the last stacks in the library, leading to the very center of the case.

"Best not to get on Beaumont's bad side." Hope stretches to peek at said librarian, shuddering when his eyes meet the icy gray. "That man has one fierce temper."

"How many bones in the human body?" Serah asks in a hurried voice.

"Two hundred and six!" Hope flinches as he answers and Serah has to shove her hand to her mouth to keep from snorting. Hope's eyes are wide and he shakes his head, taking a few steps away from Serah. "Evil. Evil, that's what you are."

She smirks, clasping her hands behind her back. "And how many in your arm?"

"Three..." Hope mutters, narrowing his eyes at her.

"The spine?"

"Twenty-six."

"Which is the longest bone?"

"The femur. Does this have a point-"

"All correct!" Serah twirls around, giggling.

"W-wait, what?" Hope's mouth opens and closes as Serah dances around, and he tries not to let his eyes linger too long on her waist.

"So far, you've answered them all right." Her smile softens and she grabs his hand, squeezing. "So no, you did not fail the exam. Quite the opposite. You probably passed with flying colors."

Hope blushes and looks away, coughing into his free hand. "Exaggeration," he mumbles.

"No, it's not! You passed. I have a good feeling about this." Serah nods to herself, turning her attention to the bookcase. "I guess we'll just have to wait and see what Noel says."

"That's if he remembers to check. Just because I told him she's posting grades doesn't mean he'll look." Hope runs a hand through his hair, biting his lip. "And I just don't want to go check later. What if I really did fail the exam? I don't..."

"Hope, we have to work on your confidence." Serah grabs his hand but doesn't look at him, her eyes studying the titles in front of her. "I mean, look at all your other classes. You're doing great in those, aren't you? And besides, there's all the other things you've managed to accomplish too. Like helping to save the world? Most people look favorably on that, so you should put it on your resume."

Hope snorts, unable to fight the smile that spreads across his face. "I don't know, I was pretty small when I did that. You think they'd believe me?"

"Of course. You have really distinct features, so it's not too hard to tell that you're the same silver-haired boy from five years ago." Serah glances at him, offering a wide smile. "Besides, girls don't forget cute faces."

Both she and Hope blush at the admission, and they are unable to meet the other's eyes. Serah tries humming to distract herself, swallowing hard. Soon she can feel Hope's eyes on her, but can't bear to look back at him.

Hope, for his part, is torn between staring at Serah and the books in front of him. His heart races and he reaches for his speech; he had planned out everything, but the exam, and the anxiety that followed, had blown the words from his mind. He reaches for a book and pretends to read the title, bouncing his foot.

Do I just say it? Will it sound stupid? What-what do I-

"Hope...um, I'm sorry, but-"

"I think you should go back to college." Serah's jaw drops and Hope resists the overwhelming urge to slam the book to his face. His grip tightens around its edges but he keeps his eyes locked with hers.

"I mean it, Serah. I think-I think it'd do you a lot of good, if you had something to do outside of the house." He licks his lips, some of his earlier thoughts coming back to him. "Even if you just come part-time. I mean, tuition here isn't that bad, and I know you'd do well. You're great at studying, and you love to read, and..." Trailing off, he smiles at her. "I just, I think you'd do awesome. And I bet there are a ton of clubs you'd be into, and I could help you out, and you'd make a bunch of friends."

"H-Hope..."

"No! You will!" He swallows hard, cheeks burning red. "Tons. I mean, it's impossible to not like you. Even Noel is warming up to you, and that guy can be pretty prickly. And we've got a writering club, and a book club, and a ton of sports-" He stops, catching his breath and sanity. "And-and I know it sounds weird when I say it, but I think you should-Umpf!"

Serah plows into him, wrapping her arms around him and pulling his face into the crook of her neck. Hope's entire body joins his red cheeks, now in flames at the sudden contact. He hugs her back with his free hand, biting his lips.

"Hope," Serah whispers, and he jolts when he hears the sob in her voice. "You can be so sweet sometimes. I just don't know what to do when you say things like that."

Hope blinks, eyes narrowing. "But it's all true, Serah."

She squeezes him, choking the words out. "See? There you go again. Being all sweet to me."

Hope sighs, closing his eyes and smiling into her neck. "Well, if it means I get hugs, I'll just have to keep doing it."

She chuckles and Hope's heart soars at the sound. He prefers it when she laughs, smiles, giggles. The tears and sobs from the other night still echo in his head, so he burns these noises to memory. A smiling Serah, a laughing Serah, and Serah hugging him because he's done something right. Not because she is so alone it hurts.

Eventually, Serah pulls away, her eyes bright and a little wet. Hope smiles at her and she returns it, glancing down at the book in his hands.

"You really are something else, Hope." She pauses, licking her lips. "College? I mean, I've-I've wanted to go. Even after Snow proposed, but I figured..." She shakes her head, bouncing in place. "But maybe I can! Maybe I can really come back to school."

Serah turns to the books, smile turning to a wide grin. "I bet I could check a lot of these out then." She slips the book from his fingers and places it back on the shelf, only to pull a light blue book down. "Like this one! I bet I'd write a decent thesis on it, if nothing else. I just loved it in high school. It's been forever since I read it last."

Hope watches her fawn over the book, his smile still firmly in place. "Serah, you can get the book now. It's not like my library card is going anywhere."

She whips around, hugging the book to her chest as her eyes light up. "Really? You'll get it for me?"

"How can I not? You're practically drooling over it!"

"Am not!" She wipes at her mouth, cheeks red. "See? Nothing."

"You had to double check."

She rolls her eyes, still smiling. "Whatever. Thank you, that's all I can say. First this college thing, now the book..." Her eyes mist over and Hope watches as she curls her hair in her fingers. His gaze drops to her smile, chest lifting.

"Serah, it's nothing." She pauses at his low tone. His eyes are dark and remain on her. "I want to do this. I want you to be happy." He reaches for the book, sliding his fingers along the edge. Her breath hitches when his fingers touch hers, but pulls the book away before she can react.

"You want me to be happy?" she mutters to herself, although Hope's eyes flicker back to hers.

"Yes." His voice is hoarse. Low and firm.

He is so close to her now, and her heart won't stop pounding.

"What if I want you to be happy too?" she asks, mouth dry. She's leaning toward him, although she doesn't notice. The room is growing warmer and warmer and their eyes are swirling storms.

"I wouldn't mind..." He stops, voice catching. She blinks and Hope looms over her. His breath hits her face. His fingers tremble and so do hers. She watches his eyes study her face and how the green grows darker, like skies in the wake of a tornado. Her hands grabs his arm, mouth parting.

Hope's lips push against her, soft and gentle. He closes his eyes and tilts his head, and Serah's own eyes droop and close. He hums and the vibrations thrum through her chest, shocking her heart. Hope grasps her waist and nibbles her lower lip. Their bodies are hot against each other, the flames making them writhe. She moans into the kiss, licking his lips. His tongue moves in, hand going to cup her jaw.

The book clatters to the floor. The sound is a gunshot and they rip apart, faces flush and breathing heavy. Hope's eyes are wide and dazed, and Serah lips burn from the heat of the kiss. They stare at each other, swallowing and catching their breath. Through the fog, Serah blinks and looks at the mam who has kissed her

And she kissed back.

Realization dawns and she brings her hands to her mouth, tears pricking at the corners of her eyes. Hope's mouth drops and he scrambles, looking for words that aren't there as the world collapses beneath their feet. He is still reeling from the kiss; the feel of her lips on his, but horror smothers the flame.

"S-Serah-"

It's all he can choke out before his voice dies. Serah shakes her head, taking several steps back, her hands still at her mouth. Terror strikes her blue eyes and her body quakes. Her body hitches with repressed sobs and she gasps, turning tail and running from the library.

Hope cries out and runs after her, ignoring the librarian's calls as he pushes past several students. By the time he's out the door Serah turns the corner and disappears.

A hole opens in Hope's chest and swallows his breath. His eyes throb and he shakes his head, moaning and turning to the wall. He presses his forehead against the brick, biting his lip and squashing the desperate sounds fighting to escape.

No. No, no, no, no, no. I didn't just do that. There's no way I just did that. No fucking way.

He runs his hands over his face, clawing at his red cheeks and letting his teeth tear at his lips. The heat of her lips, the soft skin, replays like a record in his head and he knows, knows he kissed her. Knows he liked it. Is distantly aware that she kissed him back.

But she is gone now, and hollowness seeps into his stomach. He opens his arms to the numbing sensation, ignoring the stares he's sent with his head pressed to the wall.

"Hope! Hey, Hope!"

Noel's voice comes from far away, but Hope doesn't look up. Cannot. Hope's hands tremble, and he hears Noel pause.

"Hey, what's wrong?"

Hope shakes his head, not looking. Manages to grind out, "What is it, Noel?"

Noel blinks, narrowing his eyes and glancing around, as if he could catch the cause of Hope's distress.

Noel walks up to Hope, pushing a paper to his face and saying in a low voice. "I checked for the exam scores." Noel bites his lip, wondering if he should smile or bring his friend to the nearest coffee shop. "You, um, passed with flying colors. Got an A."

Hope's body stiffens and he buries his face in his hands.