A/N: As usual, thank you for the warm reviews - keep them coming! I promise Theresa will be next, if I can get to 15 reviews.

For now, here's some quality Neil.

Neil

Day One

New Year's eve party, so tedious.

Everyone should be celebrating me! Not the start of a new year!

Day Three

Answering fan mail, so boring. Dear Neil, you're so sexy! Dear Neil, you're the most gorgeous person in existence! Dear Neil, you're so attractive, you should rule the world!

Well, yes, I already know that.

Day Nine

Modelling shoot today! But awful train yard so bad for my complexion – will need to have a serious bath to wash all the dirt from my pores.

Later

Better offer, left awful train place. Some agent called Cronus, bit of an odd guy. Thinks he's the king of the world…

I mean, there's only one king around here, and he rules the world of fashion! ME!

Day Ten

The agents are getting quite competitive over me. Whole group of them actually threw deluded-king off his building. Wasn't all that sad to see him go. Watches Gossip Girl like it's a religion.

He should be worshipping me!

New lodgings aren't all that great. Still, have a bathroom to myself. Indulged myself in a bath for the afternoon.

Day Eleven

Leader of new agents seems obsessed with Cronus. Have told him to play it up a bit – get Theresa jealous. Obviously likes her. Hope he realises she can read his mind…

Day Twelve

Okay, seriously – where's my mirror?

Day Thirteen

All these earthquakes are making my skin feel odd. Can't find mirror still – moped around all day. Will get Jay to fix it – told him it'd impress Theresa. Next thing you know, he's throwing it at me and looking around for the girl.

Moron.

Day Fifteen

Herry's been cleaning out the fridge again – Jay sent him home so Athena could catch a break. What about me? I'm putting up with sharing my gorgeous self with all these housemates and I'm not allowed to leave.

Have told Theresa that Jay never uses deodorant, especially after a gym session.

Day Seventeen

Urgh, tree mould in the park. And I smell like dog. Yuck.

Later

Well, I am a pretty attractive guy… now I'm attracting animals?

Woah, BIG ANIMALS!

Is Herry… talking to them?

Day Eighteen

Well, I always knew Herry was a bit odd…

I mean, no one should watch that much Gossip Girl.