I'm late. Baseball,T-Ball, ice skating, dance club, preschool party, field trip to the zoo (where we discovered that gorillas drink their own urine), field trip to the Smithsonian Museum of Natural History (Where third grade boys saw the boobs of a cavewoman and I had to let my son go into the mens room by himself) Go-to class mom who put in 20 hours making copies. Oh and an American Girl Birthday party for my daughter.

Excuses...but I hope this chapter makes up for it.

P.S. All the good parts are because of Jessypt.

Chapter 21- Brick by Brick

All the pictures that we've taken
and the songs that we have played
They have all kept track and
followed back the love that we have made.
Now they're spread out on the
surface where we can try to congregate
It's not too late to believe that we can get it all again

Brick by brick,

we can build it from the floor,
If we hold onto each other,
we'll be better than before.
And brick by brick,
we'll get back to yesterday
When I made your body shiver and
when you took my breath away,
you took my breath away

-Train

Edward POV

The cool spring weather in the mountains slowly changed over to pleasant summer heat. It had been a month since Alice and Jasper came home and still there was no sign of Victoria. We kept in close contact with the Denalis, but they had not heard from Irina either. Tanya mentioned heading this way but was torn between her loyalty to Irina and her loyalty to us.

I understood why Irina was with Victoria. They had something in common: the loss of their mates, both dead by our hands. None of her family had liked Laurent, and they'd had a feeling that he was using Irina to gain insight into the way we lived, but they couldn't convince Irina of that. She had fallen in love, and it saddened me that the trail of people hurt by James' mistakes had grown even longer. Now she was in Victoria's sphere of manipulation, and I was afraid lost to all of us.

We still watched the news, but the reports of the supposed serial killer dwindled. We had waited tensely for weeks for Victoria to show her hand, but nothing happened. The intense killings ceased, leaving us at a loss for what she had planned next.

We remained vigilant, and I set to rebuilding my relationship with Bella. Knowing she had lost all trust in me was an incredibly painful feeling. I knew she held a lot of hurt, confusion, anger and sadness inside of her. I wanted to take those emotions away and replace them with only happiness, but it was hard. I had to take the time to really understand her feelings. It was the only way to begin rebuilding the trust I had broken.

What I did to her was wrong. I had accepted that and had asked for forgiveness, telling her I would never leave her again, but in order for those words to truly have any meaning, my actions had to be in harmony with them.

I had told her the truth about why I had left and the more I'd explained, the more I realized how selfish my excuses sounded. I was selfish; every decision I had made was steeped with my own selfish desires in mind. Even trying to protect Bella had been about me. It was painful to swallow my pride, but building a stronger relationship with Bella was my first priority.

I also let go of the secrecy. I had been hiding many things about Victoria from her and realized it wasn't worth keeping secrets anymore. It took tremendous effort to shield her from it, and the hurt in her eyes when she discovered I was doing it tore my heart to shreds. Every time I was tempted to keep something from her, I remembered how secrets had shattered her trust in me—us—the first time. In the time we'd been back together, we had cultivated a small amount of trust; I knew if I wasn't completely honest with her, there would be no hope for us.

As time passed, I told her everything about myself that I had always held back for fear of disgusting or scaring her. In doing this I hoped she would be able to understand my feelings more clearly. I wanted her to understand why I reacted to things the way I did. Trying to figure that out myself took a lot of self-contemplation and a conversation with Carlisle.

He had been concerned about how Bella felt and was reacting to my overprotective nature. He worried about my reactions to things like her training, for instance, and how they might be perceived. After suppressing my initial urge to defend my actions, I knew he was right. I had reacted like a jerk when Jasper suggested we teach her how to fight and defend herself. She needed training. Everybody agreed, including me five minutes after I stuck my foot in my mouth, but my first instinct was to do whatever I needed to do to keep her safe. I knew she was not a fragile human anymore, but the thought of losing her again burned inside of me.

I wanted to take her away, take her somewhere safe, like the island off of the coast of Brazil that Carlisle gave Esme, but without Carlisle even having to tell me I knew it was a bad idea. Leaving would have kept her safe, but it would have made her resentful and even more closed off than she already was. And as much as I might have wished otherwise, we were nowhere near ready for the intimacy of Isle Esme. Bella would have seen right through any attempt on my part to getaway as nothing more than another attempt to control her.

Instead, I decided to work on getting things back to normal. Victoria was always in the back of my mind, and Bella started learning to fight. I tried to teach her, but I couldn't attack her. After the hurt I had already caused her, I couldn't fathom even messing up her hair let alone trying to toss her to the ground. After several failed attempts, I left the training to the others.

With training off my mind, I focused all my attention on courting her. Until we started, I didn't realize we'd never gone through that stage last time. We went hunting together, something she had wanted to do with me but hadn't because of the way I had freaked out before. She'd taken to hunting with everyone but me, and after some convincing, she let me take her. She was magnificent. To see her that way helped me realize I was getting what I'd never believed possible—the chance for forever with her.

I brought her flowers and little gifts. Carlisle had given her a cell phone, but I also bought her an iPod. We spent days just laying in her meadow, listening to the music I added to it. She still hated me spending money on her, but she couldn't hide her childish delight at the boxes of books I'd ordered for her.

We spent a string of sunny clear summer days indoors playing countless games of Monopoly; it was one of the few games people would play with me because my mind-reading didn't give me the advantage. We had a blast. It was effortless and intimate. We would sit side-by-side, her thigh would brushing against mine whenever she'd move, sending bolts of lightning up to my brain, and from the sideways looks she had given me, I knew she felt something too.

She still retired to her room —alone. I knew I could have asked to be invited in when I kissed her cheek at her door, but I didn't. She still looked at me with a guarded look that tore at my confidence, and until her eyes were clear and fully welcoming, trusting, I wouldn't share her bed.

One night, after holding Bella a little longer outside her room, I walked down to my room in the basement and chose a CD. I was lying on my bed and would have been startled if I hadn't heard his thoughts. Still a big kid, Emmett thought he was quiet enough to come undetected. His plan was to open the door and land on top of me. I moved quickly, grabbed the door knob, and pulled just as he was about to turn it.

"Boo!"

Emmett screamed like a girl. "What the—damn it, Edward!"

I laughed so hard at his expression I doubled over. "As if you could surprise me. Nice try though. Maybe you shouldn't have such shouty thoughts."

"Whatever. I'll get you some day when you least expect it." He walked over to my CDs and shook his head. He didn't like my taste in music. "What are you doing down here? After that display upstairs between you two I would have guessed you'd finally be in her room gettin' some."

I shook my head and tried for a disapproving look. "She's not ready."

"So, what? You're down here being a moody ass? You need to make a move instead of sending her all these mixed signals. Hell, even I'm confused."

I sighed. "She's so tentative with me. I'm afraid to scare her."

"Dude, even a blind man could see her confusion. Bella thinks you don't want her. She told Rose she's afraid you're only sticking around because you feel like you have to. You need to do something different, and soon. It's only going to get harder and harder."

Emmett was right. I'd told Bella I wanted her, but I hadn't shown her. I needed to change that.

All night long I thought about what Emmett had said and how I could show her exactly how I felt. It was almost dawn when an idea formed clearly in my head. She had never read the Harry Potter series, being more a fan of the classics, and neither had I. After some digging, I found the books on one of the bookshelves in the living room. A short while later, when golden rays of sunshine started to peek above the horizon, I knocked on her bedroom door. She opened the door with a smile on her face that took my breath away.

"Good morning."

I tucked the blanket I'd grabbed from the linen closet under my arm and reached for her hand, kissing it lightly. I was thrilled by the goose bumps that formed, but I ignored them.

"Hi. It's going to be a gorgeous day outside. How about we go to the meadow and start reading the first Harry Potter book?"

She looked out the window. "It's awfully sunny out. What if someone sees us?"

"I checked with Alice; we'll be fine. I need to get out of the house."

She agreed and together we walked out on the path that had been made for her. She raised her face to the sky, reveling in her still new vampire luster and how it refracted the light in beautiful shimmer of colors. I looked at her beauty and wanted more.

"You are so beautiful."

A warm smile spread across her face, and I could tell by the way her eyes flashed to the ground that had she been human her cheeks would have been warm and pink.

My chest swelled at the knowledge I could still make her feel that way. I reached for her hand, and after a second of hesitation, she slid her fingers between mine.

I used to keep her at arm's length to resist the urge to hold her or kiss her too hard, but I didn't have to do that anymore. She was no longer the breakable human I had fallen in love with. She was strong, so solid and beautiful, so graceful. I only wished she would let me in, that she'd close the distance between us.

When we arrived at the meadow, I released her hand and smoothed the blanket out on the grass, so we could lie down. Birds chipped happily, and a gentle breeze brushed across our skin. The sun had made the forest smell so clean, and I was happy we were able to have a place we could go without being noticed by humans. Bella lay next to me on her stomach and opened the book. I propped myself up on my side and brushed the hair away from her cheek, so I could see her as she read aloud.

I watched her mouth form the words, but I wasn't following. She set the book down and smiled over at me.

"Are you even listening?"

I shook my head and cupped her cheek in my hands. She rolled over onto her side and closed her eyes as I moved my hand to her neck and tilted her face up toward mine.

"Bella, I want to kiss you," I whispered against her cheek.

She nodded her head and moistened her lips with the tip of her tongue. I moved in slowly, but as soon as our lips met I instantly deepened the kiss. I pulled her body against mine and rolled her so I was hovering over her. I tucked a wayward strand of hair behind her ear and ran my hands down her side, gently brushing a sliver of skin that was showing between her shirt and pants.

She ran her hand up over my chest and wound one of them around my neck into my hair, keeping me pressed against her lips. The other hand clutched at my shirt near my waist.

The sensation of her body under mine was almost overwhelming. I hitched her leg over my hip and ran my hand up and down the back of her thigh until she broke away from my kiss and threw her head back with a moan.

I wasn't about to let her stop me. I kissed her jaw down to her neck and resisted the urge to suck on the delicate skin. She tasted so amazing. She reached for the buttons on my shirt and alarms went off in my head, but I didn't stop her. She pushed my shirt off and tugged at my t-shirt until I pulled it off over my head.

I was kneeling above her and looked down to see her swollen lips and eyes filled with passion and pulled her up to my mouth. But this time I went slower. We kissed and nibbled, tasted and teased. I put my hand under her shirt and caressed her bare back while she explored my chest with her hands and lips. Her touch was almost more than I could bear. I felt like I would explode, embarrassing myself.

"Edward."

I nuzzled her neck. "Hmm?" She had stopped caressing me, and I wanted to arch into her hands and beg her not to stop. The corner of her eyes tightened and I froze. "What's wrong?"

"I—uh—I'm not ready for this. There's something I need to tell you first."

She started trembling in my arms, but it wasn't from pleasure. I knew what she was going to say. Alice told me about her boyfriend in New York. I pulled away and held her gently so I could see her face without breaking the contact we had. I kissed both of her eyelids and her mouth.

"Today—you and me—is about what I'm feeling right now. It has nothing to do with the past—our past, mine or yours. I want you in any way I can have you. I just couldn't go any longer without touching you. Nothing you have to say is going to change how I feel or what I want."

Her eyes locked with mine. She stared, deep and searching, and I waited for her to find what she needed. I wanted her to see the truth behind my words, the sincerity of my heart, and to know that she was everything, everything, to me.

Her eyes fluttered closed and then back open as she reached for my face and pulled me in for a kiss. There were no words, no explanation, but I didn't care. I could feel the shift, feel the way she had opened her heart to me.

We spent the day pressed as close as we could. We read the first Harry Potter book, but I don't remember a thing except for the taste of her skin.

I walked her to her room that night and just like every night I kissed her tenderly. As I moved away, her fingers wrapped around my wrist, each one claiming me in a way I had never felt.

My eyes traveled from my wrist to her face. Her eyes were bright, golden and shiny, and I felt the breath I didn't even need catch in my throat.

"Stay with me."

xoxoxo-

Progress?

I wasn't exaggerating, I owe so much of this chapter to Jessypt's talent. I am in awe of her. Thank you for the time you take out of your busy life to help me. I wish I could hug you!

Thank you for your thoughtful reviews. I wait with bated breath to see what you think. Leave me some love! (Please...)