Title: Love Letter to Myself
Rating: K
Summary: Above all else, Damon was a survivor.
Pairing: Damon/Happiness
The words never changed regardless of the conviction and desperation that seeped from her voice as she begged. The yellowing crumpled paper held a message that would forever remain, even as tears blurred her vision. Language which had always been her ally now left her to rot. Content and form had abandoned her. Without life, weak and stupid, disoriented and alone. Leaving behind a shell of the person he had once known. His words were heartbreak saturated in ink and blood. She hated him for always being right. But nothing compared to the her own self-loathing for never proving him wrong.
My dearest Elena,
I hope this letter finds you in good health. I'm sure it's become obvious that I have moved on. Not from you, but from that life from everything that was intrinsically but never truly mine. I made you a promise and I regret it to the very core of my being, not for the reasons you're thinking but because I knew even then that one day I would no longer be welcome by your side. I was a placeholder and while I held that position with pride the day has come sweet 'lena. It's up to you now. Your life is your own. I wouldn't trust it with anyone else and neither should you. If you don't mind protecting your mortality as ferociously as I did that would greatly appreciated. I can only imagine all the things you are burning to say to me, go ahead. Your rage will no doubt transcend all of the barriers between us. However I will not be compelled into guilt. One day, you'll die under someone else's watch. I'm sorry. One day, I won't be in love with you and it won't matter what you do or don't feel towards me. You're welcome. I'm warning you that this will be the day you finally figure it out. Don't be too hard on yourself. You are young. But that does not give you permission to waste time. Don't look for me Elena, nor plead with me to be patient. We can both agree that you're are not the type to ignore expectations. Whether you are too weak or too strong to make a decision with such heavy consequences I don't know. What I do know is that you would rather wait until I choose for you, and that I would let you pretend to hate me for it. I'm sure you've realized by now that this letter will not provide the explanation you were seeking when you entered my room. I have nothing more to give you Miss Gilbert, you know the answers and in time you will come to accept them. I would say goodbye but... I am still as much in denial as you.
Sincerely, temporarily yet forever yours,
Damon Jax Salvatore