Seventy-two hours had passed since Maura had moved out of their house—seventy-two of the longest hours of Jane's life. In the hours since Maura had left, Jane hadn't utilized the rooms that held the most memories for her. She slept on the living room couch rather than their marital bed. She showered in the guest bathroom as opposed to the master bathroom. Jane had attempted to shower in the master bathroom the night Maura left, but all she could do was cry as the warm water trickled down her body. She thought about the times she had made love to Maura in that very shower and the thought of Maura's wet, naked body pressed against hers was overwhelming for Jane. She had become aroused for the first time in weeks and she attempted to get herself off while imagining what Maura used to do to her in the shower. Maura would start out by pinning Jane to the wall of the shower. Jane preferred to be in control during sex, which was usually a turn on for Maura, but there were times Jane could tell her wife's desire was to switch roles. When Maura had her wife against the wall, she'd proceed to get on her knees for her. While gripping Jane's thighs, Maura would start to slowly taste her wife. Just the sight of Maura on her knees was enough to make Jane climax, so when she started to maneuver her tongue, Jane would have to everything in her power to keep from coming in mere seconds. What always added to the moment was the love and intimacy in Maura's actions. While on her knees, Maura never broke eye contact with Jane. Not only did she want to taste and feel how much her wife was aroused, she wanted to savor the very sight of Jane's facial expressions and how her stomach muscles would tense as she came. Jane never told Maura, but she was infatuated with the way Maura always swallowed immediately after Jane's orgasms. Jane would watch the movement of Maura's throat muscles as her own fluids were swallowed and even enjoyed by Maura. With that memory replaying in her mind, Jane stopped pleasuring herself. There was no pleasure in what she was doing because it meant nothing without Maura. Sex, itself, meant nothing without Maura.
During the seventy-two hours following Maura's move, Jane reflected on everything that had happened with Sam. The two of them had an on-again-off-again relationship when Jane was in her mid-twenties. Her beauty had captivated Jane until she realized Samantha didn't have the personality to match. She was intelligent and goal-oriented, but she let the pursuit of money take precedent over her personal relationships including her relationship with Jane. She constantly broke their dates and promised to make it up to Jane, but every single one of her promises went unfulfilled. The rest of the Rizzoli family had seen right through her from the beginning, but Jane always made excuses for Samantha. Their relationship only lasted a year, but it was long enough to take a toll on Jane. She dated women in the meantime, but she never wanted to get serious with anyone until Maura. Maura had become her world and Jane never looked back.
Jane had told Tommy and Maura that she was catching up with Sam when they were at the bar, but it wasn't entirely true. Jane had no intentions of catching up with Sam, nor did she care what Sam had done over the past ten years. She was a happily married woman and she was more than content with where she was in other aspects of her life. What she wanted was to rub Sam's face in her happiness as juvenile as that may have sounded. Instead of letting Jane speak, Sam went on about some merger and what it meant for her. "Maybe I can finally get out of Boston now," Sam told her. "You know I've had my heart set on Wall Street for years." Jane was just itching to leave, but Sam kept talking. Jane's plan had backfired on her, so she had yet another drink just so she could stand the sound of this woman's voice. That drink turned into Sam buying them a round of shots, followed by Jane buying them a round to return the favor. They bought more rounds in an attempt to outdo each other and the more they drank, the friendlier they became. Jane told Sam about her wife and how in love she was, but she wasn't sure how much she had told her or whether or not her words were slurred. All of the alcohol was taking a toll on Jane's bladder, so she made a quick trip to the ladies room. When she returned, she noticed Sam already had a drink waiting for her. That last drink had pushed Jane over the edge. Within half an hour, she felt like vomiting, so she made her way back to the restroom. It was a drink Jane had never tried before, so she chocked it up to that particular mix not agreeing with her. The last thing she remembered about that night was a brief conversation they had after she staggered back to their table where Samantha was calm and collected although she had ordered the same drink for herself that she ordered for Jane.
"Baby, are you alright?" Samantha asked as she held Jane's hand from across the table.
"Don't call me that," Jane angrily told her. "And get your hands off of me. I need to go. I have to be home in case Maura wants to Skype with me like she suggested. I need Maura. I need to see her." Jane knew she was rambling, but she didn't care. More than ever, she was longing for Maura.
"I'm not letting you go home by yourself in this condition," Samantha insisted. "You're coming home with me."
"No!" Jane told her. "I'm married, Sam, and I'm in love with my wife. What can't you understand about that?"
"The bar isn't closing for another two hours," Samantha said, completely ignoring Jane's question. "We'll just stay here until you feel better."
That was the last part of the night Jane remembered. She knew she had brought her phone out at some point and they took pictures as they kissed, but she couldn't pinpoint when or why she had done so or even why she would kiss Samantha in the first place. Jane tried to focus on the details of that night, but there wasn't much she could recollect. She didn't remember how she got to Samantha's apartment and she definitely didn't remember having sex with Samantha, but she knew that it had happened because of the scene Jane woke up to in the morning. Her wedding ring was off of her finger, although she didn't remember taking it off. Sam took it off! Jane finally concluded as she lied on her living room couch. Knowing this woman touched her ring infuriated Jane. Jane remembered waking up naked next to Samantha. The sheets were completely soaked from what they had done, but Jane couldn't remember if it was because of something she had done to Samantha or something Samantha had done to her. Not wanting any confrontation with that woman, Jane put her clothes on, grabbed her ring and her phone, and headed out while Sam was still fast asleep.
She went home and cried in their bed, uncertain if she should tell Maura. Regardless if she remembered it, she had still betrayed her wife and she had broken their vows. It wasn't like her to do so, but Jane decided to take the coward's way out. Sam isn't that vindictive and I'll be able to put this behind me, but she was never quite able to put it behind her. The guilt consumed Jane, but she still couldn't tell Maura. Even when confronted, she still couldn't tell her, so she told Maura and Tommy a lie that spiraled out of control because it was easier than telling them a truth that she wasn't quite certain of.
Her lie had cost Jane her marriage and it was made even clearer as she looked at the empty closet in the guest room. Maura's clothes were gone. Maura's books were gone. Even Maura's toiletries in the bathroom were gone. Maura was gone and Jane knew it was her fault for not telling the truth. More than anything, she wished she could see Maura or even talk to her on the phone, but she knew that would just hurt Maura even more than she was already hurting. Jane felt like she owed it to Maura to leave her alone, so instead of calling her she stared longingly at a picture of her on her phone until she was finally able to fall asleep.