Disclaimer: Don't own supernatural.

Warning: Contains M/M slash and male pregnancy.

Chapter Eight

Sam hurriedly explained that everything was okay to Dean as he headed towards the car. Thanks to the baby, he was always real tired but he didn't care about that. His baby was moving inside him and even though he couldn't feel it yet, he smiled at that fact. He wondered then if his baby would have any hair. Would it stay dark or go light like Gabriel's hair. Would he be more like the archangel or more like Sam? Would his personality be more like his or his daddy's? There was so much he wanted to know about his baby and he could no longer wait for the baby to be born.

"Dude, quit thinking too hard. I think you are way too excited about being in the emergency room," Dean grumbled.

Sam gulped having forgot momentarily that he was only in there to check to make sure everything was okay. His asthma didn't flare up though; it was simply a side effect of being body swapped. He idly wondered what Dean's reaction would be to finding out that he got the baby checked out. He seemed half annoyed already that Sam even had to go to the emergency room in the first place.

He decided to give honesty a shot.

"The doctor thought the pregnancy triggered my asthma," he answered moistening his dry lips. As Dean gave him a petulant look, Sam continued. "I may have told about it so I could get some of the answer I needed and let's face it, I needed to see a doctor anyways."

"Yeah and how's the baby?" Dean asked. "Squishy? No, how about small like a pear? The baby probably is so tiny that if it were born now, it wouldn't survive."

Sam nodded confirming at least half of that. He didn't know what size the baby would actually be if it were to come out now but if born, the baby would likely die.

"Well I found out that it looks like a baby," Sam told him, unable to contain the excitement anymore. He thought about showing the ultrasound photos but decided to wait until after he showed Gabriel his kid first. It was only fair.

"What did you think it would look like?" Dean asked rather amused. "I remember when mom was pregnant with you and I saw the ultrasound with you in her stomach. It was so cool and you always had your thumb in your mouth in utero it seemed. Every time mom would need an ultrasound, that's how they would find ya."

Sam smiled at that.

He didn't know a lot about his own mother but he knew that she loved him and even though he would never remember it, he had six months' worth of her loving him. He imagined dad may have been more laid back then and wasn't the hard drill sergeant that he had been later in life. He frowned wondering if Gabriel would warm up to the baby. He was probably off giving just deserts to jerks right now but if he called, he knew that Gabriel would probably come to talk to them. He couldn't bother him though and the longer he didn't, the more he got used to the fact that he was going to be a father.

"Yup, you were also a very noisy baby, especially when you needed something because then you needed it right then and there," Dean continued with a small laugh. "Then again you did bet better and mellowed out. You were really good once you slept through the night."

Sam nodded.

He was still thinking about his own baby and how Gabriel was going to take it to him finding out that the baby was a boy. He frowned thinking that Gabriel might never get used to the idea even though love created the baby and it just felt so right. He wasn't just going to get rid of it just because Gabriel wouldn't accept responsibility for it and he was willing to tell him when he did show up and still wasn't receptive to the baby.

He was interrupted from his thoughts when the phone rang and Sam quickly got it out of his pocket and answered it.

"Castiel? Well we're driving right now. Oh, I'll find out." He pulled the phone from his ear and looked at Dean curiously, definitely taking in the fact that Dean seemed annoyed that Cas didn't call him. "Where are we Dean and where are we going? Castiel wants coordinates. Supposedly there's something he needs to speak with us about."

"Well the next exit is the motel. Tell Cas that if he waits five minutes we could give him the location of the hotel we're staying at and make sure to add that we're looking into local disappearances in the area to make sure there's nothing supernatural snacking on the general population."

Sam nodded and relayed it to Cas.

"Okay so Cas said he'll leave it up to you to call him when we get there." Sam answered, leaning back with a small sigh.

Dean looked annoyed.

"How could you be tired so much? You had an eight hour beauty sleep and you still act like you want to go back to bed."

"You try carrying a baby inside you that takes your nutrients to grow and tell me how tired you are." Sam answered with a small smile.

Dean groaned.

"The day I carry a kid is the day you admit that you were wrong about something," Dean grumbled.

"I'm wrong sometimes, I admit it when I am," Sam quickly retorted. At Dean's look, he continued. "I know when I'm wrong Dean. What did you think the apocalypse has been about so far? I know I messed up and I was wrong. I was wrong about thinking I could have a normal life in the beginning. I am wrong a lot but you know what?"

Dean shrugged.

"No I don't know but you're going to tell me, right?"

Sam smiled.

"I know that the decision to have the baby. I know I did that right."

Sam leaned back and decided to close his eyes for a minute despite Dean's amusement. It was only going to be a minute he told himself. He wondered if Lucifer was going to visit his dreams again like he had the night before and frowned at the thought. He was super powerful and didn't have a problem showing it, but Sam knew that whatever he did, he always stuck by his belief. He thought he was doing the right thing so why couldn't he just talk it out without the big prized fight?

Sam couldn't be sure but he figured if they talked it out, things would be okay again. Not only because they as brothers loved each other like Sam and Dean did but to go so many centuries being miserable. He knew they would get to a point when they see this and maybe the day would come when they actually do that.

There was only so much he could hope for though.

And a prized fight ending without any fighting?

There was no doubt in his mind that anything they did would change that.

"You took longer than I expected," Cas replied with a frown.

Dean rolled his eyes and Sam looked around wondering if Gabriel was even going to show up. He knew that he was mad at him but he thought that he would at least be here to brainstorm about what was happening out there in the world. Cas turned his frown to Sam and the younger Winchester was surprised to find that Cas's frown only deepened.

"You're still pregnant," he stated and Sam nodded wondering why he was sounding so upset about it.

"Yeah, he is Sherlock and what is up with your dick of a brother?" Dean asked. "So what he doesn't want the responsibility of a child but he made the baby with Sam and he should deal with it!"

Cas looked from one Winchester to the other and seemed to get what they were pointing at. He tipped his head sideways and Dean rolled his eyes wondering what the angel could be thinking about now. He always had something and even though he didn't share it all, what he did was either tips about a local hunt or about something he didn't understand. He wondered what it was this time.

"Dean Gabriel didn't mean to be a jerk; he's just worried about Sam that's all. Who's Sherlock?" he added with a small frown as though he expected the Sherlock person to just jump out and announce himself.

"Right and all he said was get rid of it," Dean replied with an eye roll, ignoring the last comment Cas had made. "He should have stayed and talked to Sam about it since you know, it's their baby!"

Cas nodded forlornly.

"I think he's going to. Sam is still pregnant so he is going to explain and maybe you'll even agree in the end. Gabriel had a lead about something that he's following but he'll be here soon-"

"You agree with Gabriel about the abortion?" Sam interrupted with shock.

"I normally don't but Gabriel seems to love you very much," Cas replied without looking over at him.

Dean glared.

"Well hey if he loves him enough, why not keep the baby?"

Cas really did look like he was trying to get out of telling them himself and Dean sighed, throwing up his hands and sitting back into his chair. If Cas was all for the abortion, so be it to tell the angel exactly everything that was wrong with that. Then there was Gabriel and once he came there, he was so kicking his ass.

He was saved from thinking anymore about actually doing it when the said angel showed up. He didn't look too happy with Sam and Dean couldn't care ales if he or not. Nobody shirked on the responsibility of a baby, nobody. That made Gabriel a bad father in his book and the relationship he had with Sam sounded so surreal, so superficial and he couldn't see them surviving as a couple in the future the way Gabriel was going on.

"Why am I the only sane one here?" Gabriel asked under his breath making them snap to look at him in shock. "Did it ever occur to you that there's a reason I told you not to get pregnant? That there's a rhyme or reason for why I told you to get rid of it in the first place? Even little bro knows and even though he thinks it is better coming from me, he knows the circumstances and thinks it is better doing it this way."

"But I can't kill an innocent life just because you don't think you could handle the baby," Sam blurted out. "I'm not killing our son!"

Gabriel looked at him in shock and Sam quickly backed up thinking that maybe he shouldn't have shouted that out loud. Not when Gabriel was so mad and was trying to talk him into terminating the only thing that was making him happy right now. He made so many people miserable in the past just by the choices he made but the baby was going to make it all right. Every little mistake that he couldn't undo was just that. Something he couldn't take back. Having the baby was a choice he wouldn't have to live with and wonder if he did the right thing. He wouldn't regret it afterwards and Gabriel had to realize that. He loved the baby even before he saw his son on the screen. He couldn't bring himself to even think about the possibility of killing the baby and Gabriel would have to live with it.

"How do you know you are having a son Sam?" Gabriel seemed to be asking carefully. "I don't think this is a guess so I'm guaranteeing that you saw someone for it to know, right?"

At Sam's small nod, trying to make himself small, Dean glared at Gabriel. Nobody had the right to mess with his brother. Nobody, he didn't care who they were was either. He quickly got in between them and crossed his arms defiantly.

"Don't you talk about this like you didn't have a part to play either," Dean snapped angrily. "It takes two to make a baby after all."

Gabriel frowned.

"You're not wrong about that but there's a reason why I'm mad and you just aren't shutting up for me to explain it. Responsibility has nothing to do with it. If it was about that I wouldn't be here now trying to help with the end of the freaking world!"

"Why don't you want this baby then?" Sam asked, a hand falling down to his stomach subconsciously. "Gabriel it's our son. He's not just a bunch of cells like most people make them out to be nor is he not a person. He is and I just can't kill him. This baby, he's innocent and whatever it was I did, it's not his fault-"

"Because I hate the baby!" Gabriel shouted.

Sam backed up to the wall, looking crestfallen at Gabriel's shocked outburst. Whatever it was that he was thinking Gabriel would say, it wasn't that. Gabriel seemed to realize he was being too harsh and shook himself before coming closer.

"I hate the baby Sam. I don't want it and if you're wondering why I told you to get rid of it, it's because you have that baby and it's going to kill you. There's no maybe or if, the baby is going to kill you if you give birth to it."

Dean looked up sharply in shock and Cas confirmed it with a nod. Sam looked even more hurt that Gabriel was saying all this just because the baby would eventually do something he would have no control over. The baby didn't do anything wrong, it was just growing and he didn't know why him having the baby would kill him though. He wondered if it was their ploy to get him to get rid of it. He couldn't. He saw the baby and it was not an option. He shook his head and Gabriel sighed, grasping his shoulders so he would look at him.

Green eyes sought hazel and Sam gulped realizing that Gabriel didn't look mad at all, he looked upset but not at anything Sam seemed to be doing. He did however try to relay something in that one glance but Sam looked away hoping he would change his mind and just go away. He didn't want the baby so why would he hang around?

"Sam," he said gently making Sam snap his head back to him. "I know you don't want to kill an innocent baby. I don't like it either but when it's life or death, I don't want you to die Sam. I'm not lying. A human body isn't designed to handle that much grace and having the baby is going to cause problems so fast, a human has never handled all of a sudden having grace inside their body and then losing it all due to the birthing process. Nobody has survived it, and when I say nobody, not one. Healing somebody isn't an option because it would involve grace that a person would have an overabundance of. I promise I'm not lying though. This baby is going to be the death of you. If there wasn't any danger in losing you I wouldn't mind the baby. I would be okay with it."

He seemed to look so lost but Sam couldn't come to feel with him over this. It was their son and he wanted to give the baby the best chance to live even if it put his life in danger. He'd feel horrible and never get over killing his baby but if he died giving the baby life? At least he did something right for a change.

"We could always have children but you can't have them Sam," Gabriel continued.

Sam finally shook his head.

"I know what you're getting at and that you're worried that I will die but I just can't justify killing something innocent," Sam explained desperate for him to see what he did. "I can't kill our son and think about a future with more children. It's just not me. I can't kill my flesh and blood to satisfy your worry-"

"Sam," Castiel interrupted. "This isn't a maybe death, it's guaranteed that you will. Gabriel isn't lying and I know that you see abortion as murder but there's no way you could continue the pregnancy, it's going to harm you. You can't have the baby early because the baby wouldn't have enough grace to survive and you could rip the baby out through the stomach but the outcome won't change. You will die and if your baby doesn't, the baby is going to be without a father-"

"But it'll be the one thing I got right!" Sam's outburst silenced the room and Sam quickly continued before they could begin to say anything. He had to explain why he had to have the baby. He couldn't kill their son. His heart wouldn't let him. "I've always messed up. I always make mistakes and when given I choice I always make the wrong one. This is something I'm not going to mess up. I love our son and I can't kill him, not when it feels so right. The only right decision I've ever made in my life-"

"You want to die?" Gabriel asked slowly. "Do you really, really want to die?"

Sam gulped and shook his head.

"Nobody plans to die," Sam quickly told him. "I could get hit by a bus or get into a car accident tomorrow and die Gabriel. There's so much I do and if given the choice I don't really want to die. The thought scares me but I can't do it."

Gabriel's hands tightened around his shoulders and Sam winced but said nothing. He seemed to be greatly upset by his admittance that he would rather have the baby, he was even shaking and Sam sucked in a breath realizing that Gabriel wasn't trying to hurt him, he was afraid of losing him that he would be able to live even if Sam couldn't at the thought of killing their son.

"Please reconsider," he said brokenly and Sam had to keep himself from sobbing that he tried to pry himself away from him. Gabriel put his forehead against his keeping him in place and causing Sam to tremble at the emotions that the archangel was expressing. He shuddered thinking what he would do if it was the other way around and couldn't continue that thought. He would probably be protective as well. "I can't lose you Sam."

"You won't lose me," Sam whispered. "I love you and you'll gain something we both made. Our little miracle."

He waited on bated breath but nothing came. Opening his eyes, he saw that he didn't need to and that Gabriel was hurt but it didn't stop him from breaking down and trying to go about his way. He would never kill their son.

"Please forgive me," Gabriel finally whispered back. He pulled Sam in a small kiss, combing a hand through his hair before breaking away and giving Sam one last glance. "I need some time to think."

Sam nodded and closed his eyes trying to get his breathing back to normal. Gabriel just needed time, time to adjust to this and he would be onboard, he told himself. Gabriel loved him and it was obvious now that he wished that he never doubted him in the beginning since Gabriel had replied with wanting him to get rid of the baby. He loved him so much that the thought of losing him even if it was to a baby, their baby, he couldn't handle it.

He broke into a sob at the thought and found arms came around his shoulders, pulling him closer. He finally allowed himself to cry. Cry for the baby that didn't understand and probably never would what it would do just by living, he cried for his brother who only wanted to keep Sam safe, he cried for those who broke down and did what was asked because they couldn't live without the other, and more importantly, he just cried for Gabriel. If he thought it was hard on him, it was nothing to how Gabriel would take it later down the road.

"It's okay Sam, I know it seems bad right now but maybe we could beat this. We've beaten death before-"

"This is different Dean," Cas quickly interrupted. "This is more different from anything you ever faced. This baby will be born and Sam will die. He most likely will stay dead. There would be nothing in this world that could bring your brother back should he choose to continue the pregnancy."

Dean was looking at Sam though and not Cas as the angel explained and even though Sam knew what was coming, he didn't think he wanted to hear it again. He couldn't stand one more person heartbroken at the thought and begging him to save himself so they wouldn't lose him. Dean did neither, just hugging him close before speaking up.

"Is this what you really want to do?" Sam looked up in shock and Dean shrugged. "It's your body Sam and if you say you want to keep the baby, well it's your choice but it has to be something you want to do. And don't worry so much about Gabriel. He's heartbroken yes but he'll shape up and support you. He will, I know he will."

Sam snorted.

"How could he ever get through this?"

Dean laughed.

"For someone telling me about true love, you are pretty dense when it comes to yourself. Because he loves you silly and when it comes down to it, he would rather spend the moments he could with you than stay away and angry at the choices you made. That's what love is about. Making sacrifices even when it could end up wrong and by following your heart you could never go wrong."

Sam nodded.

"I love him so much Dean and I don't want him to hurt but I also love this baby." Sam paused seeing that Cas looked about ready to interrupt again, maybe to say something against it but held his tongue for which Sam was glad about that because he didn't want to scrutiny. He didn't want the judgment but more importantly, he wanted to believe his brother.

"This is something I want."

A/N: Next chapter will be in Gabriel's POV