Disclaimer: J.K. Rowlings owns all. I'm just the one making the most of it. plotline however, is all mine. mwhahaha.
Facing him, breath mingling, arms around each other, in what could only be described as an embrace. Alone, in his bed. Merlin I was in trouble. Yet I couldn't help but think about how comfortable and natural I felt in his arms. I seemed to fit perfectly against his chest and it came so easily, like I was suppose to be there. Michael, you idiot, think of Michael. But then again, Michael wasn't the one who had saved my life, or even knew I had been hurt. He wasn't the one who helped me when I fell. James was. My best friend James. What am I going to do?
I groaned against the pillow accidentally waking James up. He blinked twice, seeming to focus on the position we were in before jumping up, off the bed. His hand automatically went to his hair. I grinned despite myself.
"Sorry bout that. Uhm, is there any chance that you could help me shower? I'll wear a swim suit this time, I just, I'm nervous about dropping something again. If you could just stay in the bathroom while I'm in just to make sure that I'm ok, I'd appreciate that a lot." I slid myself off the bed as I said this and lifted up his t-shirt to check the slashes. The scabs seemed to have reappeared overnight, but they still hurt.
"Yeah, that's fine. I'd rather be in there too, I don't want you to feel like you can't depend on me, cause I'm here for you, the whole time." He ran over to me and helped me struggle my way into the bathroom. We walked through the bathroom and into my room where I walked to my closet and grabbed a random bikini. He went back to the bathroom and shut the door. While I changed I looked at the full extent of the wound Severus had given me. He must have used a very dark curse because it seemed even if I moved even slightly, something would rip or tear. I put on my swimsuit as fast as I could but I couldn't reach back to tie it without hurting myself even more.
"Hey James? Can you come help me tie this please? I can't reach it." I called to him and he walked in from the bathroom. His eyes widened when he took in the sight of me in a bikini. I'm not sure why though, I mean he'd already seen me naked. The suit did accent my curves however, making my barely there curves look like I actually had a little something. He walked over to me and took the straps from my hands. After I swept my hair out of the way he quickly tied it in a bow.
"I already turned the shower on for you, the lowest pressure." He helped me up the steps to the bathroom and made sure I was in safely with both shampoo, soap, and conditioner where I could reach it. "I'll be just right here at the sink if you need me. Don't hesitate to ask me anything."
He opened the drawer underneath his sink and I couldn't help myself. I was definitely admiring his backside. He really should have put more clothes on. He pulled out a razor and some shaving crème.
"Why not just use a spell?" I realized my mistake as soon as it jumped out of my mouth. Now he knew that I was watching him. He didn't seem to mind however.
"I like the feeling that I do the simplest things for myself, and that magic doesn't completely rule my life." he got his face wet and then put shaving crème on the lower half of his face. He started shaving with smooth strokes, expertly shaving without cutting himself once.
"Well I would never shave every day. That would be way too much of a hassle." I muttered to myself. Even as I said this I recited a spell that I had come up with myself. I could feel all of the hair that I didn't want, my underarms, my legs, and my, well you know, disappear. That was nice. I remember when I finally came up with it, I was overjoyed. No more shaving! It was perfect. As I continued my shower, he continued getting ready for the day. Brushing his teeth meticulously, trying unsuccessfully to calm his mane of hair, and then cleaning his glasses.
I got out of the shower carefully and got a towel from the rack. I recited a quick spell that would dry my hair into nice curls. I walked back into the bedroom and James followed me. "I knew you would need help re-bandaging so I figured might as well do it now." he shrugged nonchalantly.
"Yeah thanks. Let me just get out of this wet suit though. I'll go put on something else. I rushed into the closest and pulled on my simple red bra and my matching red lace underwear. I walked out and was satisfied to hear the slight intake of breath from James. Part of me couldn't help but feel slightly pleased that I could get a reaction like that out of him, just from wearing underwear.
He came up to me with a fresh bandage and started wrapping it around my torso. He wrapped it twice before reciting the spell that would keep it together at the ends.
"Thank you James." I replied and he shrugged and made his way into his own bedroom. When he left I retrieved my other clothing for the day. Skirt, button down, stockings, shoes, and robes. When I was mostly dressed I realized I couldn't bend down to put my stockings on. "James! I need you're help, again. Sorry."
He came into my room with most of his clothes on also. "Don't apologize Lily. I'm here to help. What do you need?" He noticed my struggle with the stockings and said, "Ahh, I understand. Ok sit on the bed for me." He grabbed the stockings from me and I put my feet in. He slid them carefully up my legs before reaching half way up my thighs. "Can you get it from here?" I nodded and thanked him again before pulling them up the rest of the way. Before I could ask him, he had already bent down and had begun to put my shoes on for me.
"Once again, thanks James. A lot. You're a lifesaver, literally." he smiled at my corny joke and left to finish getting ready.
"Are you ready to go? Or do you need to put on makeup or something?" he seemed hesitant to ask me that and I wondered why it made him uncomfortable.
"No, I don't wear makeup. I thought you would have known that by now. And I brushed my teeth in the shower, saves tons of time, trust me." he grinned at me and nodded, taking my school bag and shushed my lame excuse of a protest.
We walked down to the Great Hall together and sat down at the Gryffindor table. Mary was there, looking nervous and rueful.
"I'm so sorry I wasn't at the hospital wing with the rest of them. Remus was helping me study for the big Transfiguration test coming up and they said you would be ok so I just kept studying. I'm really sorry. Please don't be mad." She looked so pathetic I couldn't help but laugh.
"Mary, I'm not mad at you at all. I understand completely. Don't worry." relieved, she smiled at me and motioned for me to sit next to her. James sat on my other side with Remus, Emma, and Sirius across from us.
"So now that Lilykins is all better, let's talk about the ball! We still need to discuss who we're bringing. I've already got a date, Lucy Anderson. Hell of a good looking girl. And Remus you're taking that Hufflepuff girl, uh Janice right? Right. Peter is refusing to go. Lily's with Michael of course. Alice is with Frank. Mary you're going with that Ravenclaw bloke, uh Wren Hill? And that leaves Emma. Who are you going with Emma darling?" Sirius ended his long rampage with a flourish of his hands.
"I'm going with Dawson Fry, from Hufflepuff." she said rather reluctantly like she didn't want us to know this information. "And, I've already found the perfect dress. So I don't have to go shopping with you guys. Sorry, but you know how I hate shopping." We all nodded. Couldn't argue with that.
"Well, I was thinking that we could go this weekend to find dresses in Hogsmeade. I mean, the dance is two weeks from Friday and we still have so much to do and prepare for." Alice said, freaking out as usual.
"Well I can't wait. The decorations are going to be wonderful. The charms club is already working on everything. And we booked the Galloping Frogs, so that's going to be amazing." my statement got enthusiastic nods from everyone.
"Yeah, I heard two girls talking in the bathroom. They're both in the club and they were talking about going all out with snow and an ice skating rink out by Hagrid's cabin." Mary said looking excited.
"Oh! That reminds me. I have to go and speak with Hagrid. I haven't seen him since I was in the hospital wing. He sent me a get well card and I should probably go thank him." I started shoving random food items into my mouth so I could get down there fast enough. "It's a good thing I have a free period first." I got up, waved to everyone else, and started the trek down to Hagrid's hut. It was a crisp, chilly December morning but I couldn't help but admire the beauty of Hogwarts castle. It hadn't snowed yet, but Hogwarts was beautiful. I got to Hagrid's quickly enough and knocked on the door. I could hear Fang, the enormous hound, barking from inside.
"Get back Fang! Back." Hagrid opened the door while pushing Fang back at the same time. "Ah, Lily! Yer all righ'. I have been worrin' myself sick thinkin' you wou' wind up real hurt."
"No of course not. It'll take more than a few scratches to get me." He let me inside and offered me some of his rock cakes. I politely declined.
After a long chat with Hagrid and planning on having tea soon I departed for my first class. As I was walking up the path back towards the castle, I looked up to see two students coming down the path. Thinking they were going down to the Herbology Plant Houses, I moved to the right of the path. But when I got closer to meeting them in the middle, they stopped and blocked the path completely. I looked up to get a closer look at the two people blocking my path. Avery and Nott, two Slytherins, of course.
"Excuse me boys, but I do really need to get to class." I cleared my throat and made a motion to step around them.
"Not so fast, Mudblood. You've got our little friend Snape in a whole lot of trouble. And we don't really, hmm, enjoy troublemakers." Nott said this as he looked me up and down and I realized he might just "enjoy" me.
"Keep your eyes to yourself Nott, if you wish for them to remain in your face. If not, I'll gladly remove them for you." Slowly so he wasn't watching, I reached my hand down to my pocket and gripped my wand tightly, a curse ready on my lips if they were to try anything.
"Like we'd do anything with a Mudblood like you. Well, maybe that's not true. Even for a Mudblood, well.. No never mind that." Avery trailed off uncertainly making me very uncomfortable.
"Look, I'm going to be late to class, so I'd appreciate it if you would step aside." I tried to make myself look taller and failed miserably.
"Ah, but we haven't even begun to discuss our problem with you. You see, Snape is facing punishment from Dumbledore himself. He's got detention every single Saturday until the end of term. And saying as it's only December, that's not very fair is it?" Nott reached forward and grabbed a strand of my hair and twisted it around his finger. He then took his finger and trailed it down my face from my temple to my chin. I reached up and grabbed his hand and shoved it off of me.
"Stop it, now." My eyes were hard as rocks and my stance was ready for a fight. They both started moving closer to me and I stood my ground. I pulled out my wand first and blocked the first curse Nott sent my way.
"Densaug ¾" Nott started but before I could repel the curse a new voice cut off mine and Avery's next curse.
"Stupefy! Petrificus Totalus." Both Nott and Avery fell to the ground. One stunned, and one frozen. I looked up to see none other than James Potter. He ignored me for a second and grabbed both of their wands. "You know Lily, you really need to be careful. I won't be there to save you every time." He grinned a slightly crooked grin at me but I didn't return it.
"How did you know I was down here?" I raised an eyebrow at him.
"A simple thank you could be ok too. I saw Nott and Avery, uh, looking suspicious so I followed them." I couldn't help but see his hand unconsciously teach for his robe pocket.
"Liar. What's in your pocket?" I looked at him questionably. "Oh and thank you. Again."
He only sighed and reached for what looked like a spare piece of parchment. "I solemnly swear I am up to no good." as his wand hit the parchemnt a brilliant map showing every single detail of Hogwarts appeared. As I looked down at it, I could see Dumbledore in his office, speaking with Professor Merrythought. It showed every single detail of the school: the secret passageways, the kitchens, the people, and even down to what looked like Sirius and Marcy Miller in a broom closet together. I didn't even want to know what was going on in there.
"This, this is bloody fantastic! Where did you get this?" I looked up at him, all my annoyance gone of him rescuing me, again.
"I didn't get it. I made it." he turned it over to where I saw four names slowly appear. Wormtail, Moony, Padfoot, and Prongs proudly present the Maraudars Map. When I grabbed it from his hands writing began to appear on the front. With a jolt, I realized it was addressed to me.
"Wormtail is wondering why good girl Lily Evans could ever be using something that doesn't belong to her. He is almost proud."
"Moony believes that Lily Evans is a studious and resourceful girl who probably figured out a way to force this off of Prongs."
"Padfoot is appalled that Lily Evans has still not shagged him yet. With her gorgeous hair and eyes, She is made for Padfoot."
"Prongs would like to add that Lily Evans is the most gorgeous witch there ever was and would like to know if she would marry him?"
"What in the world James. How does it know?" I looked up at him and passed him back the map, choosing to ignore the question that Prongs had asked.
"We made it back in fourth year. Sorry about the last part of that. You should be proud though. Usually it insults people. It shows everyone, anytime, anywhere. I had it out to make sure you didn't run into anyone on the way to Hagrid's. I'm sorry if that bothers you. But listen, you have to promise to never tell anyone about the map. If anyone finds out, they'll mistake it for dark magic, and we'll have it confiscated at once." He looked sheepishly at me.
"No, it's ok I guess. As long as you don't use it, like all the time. That was sweet that you were looking out for me. But we are going to be late to Transfiguration if we don't get going." We both took out our wands and began to walk away from the two frozen figures next to us. When we were far enough away, we both sent a spell their way and we could see them begin to stir. Before we were far enough away, I heard Nott call out from behind us.
"You better be careful Mudblood. You won't always have Potty to save you." He got up swiftly and began to brush himself off, not seeming to care that he had just been stunned. Avery seemed confused as he got up and almost fell back to the ground.
"Come on Lily." James lightly gripped my arm. We walked into McGonagall's room barely on time. I went and sat next to Emma.
"What were you doing walking in with James? That looked a little, well you know." She rolled her eyes dramatically.
"Ill have to tell you later. McGonagall's coming over here." I looked pointedly at the lesson board which was explaining the proper process of changing one's appearance. Today we were suppose to be practicing changing our eyebrows, adding or taking away freckles, and changing the shape of our noses and lips.
Emma and I had fun trying to come up with the most ridiculous concoctions and had gotten the hang of the spells before the lesson was halfway through. Because that was our whole lesson of the hour, I quickly told her what had gone down with Nott and Avery. Her now huge, bushy eyebrows that looked quite a bit like Hagrid's, drew together. The effect made me stifle a giggle.
"How horrible. We'll have to make sure not to leave you alone from now on. It's the only thing that could possibly work." But just as I was about to argue, a timid second year walked into the room and handed a note to McGonagall.
"Lily, you have a note from Dumbledore." McGonagall said as she made her way to our table. I took it from her hand and she made her way back up to the front. I opened the letter and read.
Dear Miss Evans,
If you could please come up to my office as soon as possible, I have very urgent news to tell you. Thank you very much.
Dumbledore.
P.S. I enjoy Licorice Wands.
Emma, who had been reading over my shoulder said, "What does the P.S. mean?"
"It's the password to get into his office. I guess I'd better go." I went up to the front ignoring James questioning glare on my back. I showed McGonagall the note and she nodded and went back to her book.
I walked to his office quickly, hoping not to have any run-ins again. I got there in a record time and said the password to the stone gargoyles guarding either side of the door. I knocked on the door and heard a voice inside say, "Enter." I pushed my way through and the first thing I saw was Fawkes, the beautiful phoenix who looked as if he was in his prime time. I then looked to Dumbledore's desk and saw, to my great surprise, Petunia, my older sister.
Before I could stop myself I said, "Tuney? What are.. Er I mean, Petunia? Why are you at Hogwarts?" But she steadily ignored me, which is what I had expected but could still feel the pinch of the hurt as it hit me. I looked to Dumbledore then, hoping that he would at least answer me.
"Lily, I'm not sure how to tell you this, but last night, Death Eaters swarmed your house. They were hoping to capture your parents to be able to use them as bait to get you. Unfortunately, or fortunately, however you look at it, your mother and stepfather decided to fight. Your stepfather managed to shoot one Death Eater with that little weapon thing, oh yes, a gun. But I am sad to inform you that your parents were murdered by Voldemort's followers last night. Your dear sister managed to escape death simply because she was at a friend's house and not home. I am very sorry to tell you this and offer my deepest condolences. I will understand if you would like to take the rest of the week off. You can have more time than that if you need. Also, I am here to talk whenever you need me." He looked at me sadly, expecting me to say something but I couldn't. I was completely shocked. My parents were dead. I would never see them again. Never hear my mom laugh while she was cooking dinner or see my stepdad do the crossword across from me while I ate my breakfast. For the past nine years my step dad has been in the family. He basically counted as my real dad, who had died when I was barely seven years old. So many memories raced through my head as I looked back on my childhood. I'd never see my parents again. Unbidden, the tears leaped to my eyes. I jumped to my feet, nodded to Dumbledore, and raced down the stairs. I took off at a sprint, ignoring the looks of all my classmates, now that class was over. Without meaning to, I ran right into The Maraudars and Emma, Mary, and Alice. The tears were pouring down my face now. I tried to get past them but Sirius and James were holding my arms in place. Even at a time like this, I couldn't help but realize it was the first time I had seen Sirius without the sparkle in his eyes.
"Le-let me g-go." I managed to stutter out. However, their only reaction was to grip me tighter.
"Lily, what's wrong? What's happened?" Remus looked very concerned which only made me cry harder. But I needed to get away from them. I couldn't do this. I took out my wand and nonverbally stunned James and Sirius and before the others could react, I raced away, towards who knows where. I finally stopped in a deserted passageway and with a jolt I realized it was the same passageway where James and I had kissed. I sunk to the floor and wrapped my arms around my knees. The tears came freely now and I let myself sob and sob until it looked like I would never stop. Before long though, I realized that someone had appeared at the end of the hallway. It was James, of course, and he had the map in his hands.
"Lily, I, I talked to Professor Dumbledore and he told me what happened. I used the map to find you." He walked over to me and sat down next to me. I was still crying but seeing him looking at me sent me into another round of tears. I hated when people saw me being weak. I put my face into my knees and started sobbing, great racking sobs, making my whole body shake. James wrapped his arms around me and I finally just let myself sink into his arms. He held me there as I cried for what seemed like eternity. He just sat there, not saying a word, occasionally stroking my hair. After a long while, the tears finally ran out. I laid there against James, not saying anything. Slowly though, I extracted myself from his arms and, ashamed, looked away from him. Two slow tears leaked out from my eyes and rolled down my face. I put my hands up, surprised that I could still cry, and began to wipe them away. But James got there first. He took his hands and gently wiped away the tears. He left his hands there, but I slowly pushed them off with my own.
"I-I, can't do t-this anymore. I-I'm with M-Michael. I'm s-sorry." and with that stuttering statement, I stood up and walked away. These new tears that were foreign to me gave way right when I turned the corner. Whatever feelings I had been developing with James needed to stop. He was my best friend. That was it. We both needed to believe that or nothing could work. I had once told James that cheating was the worst thing that could happen but I hadn't been realizing that I had begun to cheat anyway, which was unacceptable. I didn't want to do that to Michael. So I needed to give up James. The temptation was too strong. My parents had been together for more than twenty years before they.. I wanted that with someone. And no matter who it was with, they were never going to get hurt by me. So I needed to start treating my relationships the same way. But as the revelation came to life and I accepted two things, my heart started to ache. I wouldn't know until it was healed, that it had just broken. But two things I was sure of. My parents were gone, and they weren't coming back. So I needed to accept that and move on, because they wouldn't want me to be hung up on their deaths. Of that I was sure of. And the other, what ever feelings I had thought were developing with James, were done.
A/N: I'm so so so so so so sorry for the long wait. I've been on vacation the past two weeks and have had no internet connection what so ever. Chapter eight should be coming up very soon. I hope you liked this one. Please please please review and i might just give you a shout out (: *wink wink* Olivetreehugger. You've never failed to help me by your reviews. Thanks guys!