A/N: Thank you to everyone who has reviewed and alerted this story! You will never know how much it means to me and how much you inspire me to continue writing! Especially thank you to WaNderiNgDovE, akhasworld, and kurbastianfans for helping me get my mojo back after some negative words were thrown my way and shook my confidence a little bit. You definitely helped to get it back!
With that said, here is part 2 out of 3 of The Ball and we finally get to the PezBerry! Please review, I really love hearing from you all, and Enjoy!
Ch.13 *The Ball*
part 2
Kurt's POV
Kurt looked over at the person who had spoken to him and saw that his ears had not been deceiving him. "Are you allright, Tana?", he asked the dark haired latina who was staring at Rachel as if she was seeing the sun for the first time.
Santana gave no sign that she had heard him. Kurt sighed and looked up at his magnificent creation. Rachel was walking through the ballroom in a light pink silk ball gown with sleeves that only covered her shoulders and made a V shape around her bosom. Her hair was curled and gathered together on her right shoulder held together by a silver diamond barrette in the shape of a butterfly. Her eyelids were dusted in a soft blue shadow, her cheekbones a matching pink to her dress, and her lips a breathtaking cherry red. She was walking gracefully in a pair of light pink pumps that she had protested against strongly when he had first showed them to her. Her ears had diamonds bobbing below them and her wrist had diamonds wrapped around it. Glitter adorned her dress, hair, and skin. She looked like a lady and not at all like the tomboy they were all used to.
Everyone was in shock! They were all used to the very inappropriately boyish Rachel Berry-Abrams and not the breathtaking noblewoman they now saw walking toward the front of the room to take her seat beside Kurt. Rachel beamed at everyone as they gawked and moved over for her to walk through. Kurt stood up and walked over to meet her halfway, putting his arm out when he reached her. Rachel's smile widened and Kurt saw the faint blush on her cheeks as she took his arm and he led her to their table.
"You look gorgeous Rach!", he whispered to her.
She looked up at him,"Thanks to you Kurt! This is so amazing! You are a miracle worker! I would've never thought that this was possible if it hadn't been for you and the incredible friend that you are!", she leaned up to place a soft kiss on his cheek as they approached the table where Santana, Katherine, Quinn, Finn, Noah, Wes, and David were all sitting in awe.
Kurt led her to the empty seat beside his and held it out for her as she sat, before pushing it in a little and taking his own again. Finally, after what seemed like hours, but was really only a few minutes, everyone carried on with what they had been doing before, although they were obviously gossiping about Rachel as someone would glance up at her every so often.
"Wow Ray!",David exclaimed,"You look like a girl!"
Wes laughed,"Never knew you had it in you Ray! I'm impressed!"
Rachel glared at her friends with obvious amusement,"Are you two retarded? You know i'm a girl! Don't be stupid!"
Wes and David laughed and continued to tease Rachel with words like,"Guess you can't swordfight anymore, Ray! You might break a nail!", or,"Man i'm gonna miss the old Rachel! You know the one who loved to go riding and wrestle in the mud! This one's gonna try to give us manicures and make-up tips!"
Rachel laughed with them before threatening to show them just how much she was still the same Rachel with a stern look in her eyes that shut them up instantly. Kurt looked over at Santana who had been oddly quiet as everyone else complimented Rachel and Kurt on a job well done.
Santana was still staring at Rachel before standing up and walking around Kurt to Rachel's side,"Rachel? Would you take a walk with me out in the garden?"
Rachel looked up at Santana in confusion,"Sure, Santana."
Kurt watched with extreme curiosity as Rachel stood and followed Santana out to the garden. "I wonder what that was all about.", he thought.
Santana's POV
Santana had never been more confused or surprised about anything in her entire life and that was really saying something. "What the hell is going on?",she thought as she led Rachel out of the ballroom and into the North garden. All she could hear was the music, laughter, and soft clicking of her and the beautiful brunette behind her's heels as they walked down the cobblestone path to the nearest bench. The bench was surrounded by tulips and daisys and was so breathtaking and innocent that Santana couldn't think of a better place to bring Rachel. She heard Rachel stop behind her and turned toward the lovely woman who took her breath away.
"Will you please sit down?", she asked as she motioned toward the bench beside her. Rachel's deep brown eyes never left hers as she silently sat on the bench. Santana paced back and forth trying to think of something to say. Now that she had Rachel out here, she had no clue what to say to her. "Hell! I can't even get my thoughts in order! How am I supposed to explain anything to Rachel like this? Do I even want to? Rachel might not even be like me! She might like men! I know Rachel doesn't like me at all and is just tolerating me for Kurt's sake! This was a stupid idea! I should just leave now!",she thought and was about to run away.
Before she could, she heard the melodic voice of the goddess sitting on the bench beside her speak up,"Santana? Whatever it is you don't need to be afraid to tell me. I won't judge you! I mean I know we've had our differences in the recent past, but that's only because I was jealous. Kurt is one of the greatest friends i've ever had and I just didn't want to lose him. He's the only friend i've had who I didn't get through my cousin, Blaine, or my brother, Artie. He's the only friend i've had who has actually felt completely mine and not mine and someone else's. I don't mean that he's not allowed to have any other friends, just that i'm so sick of being completely defined by Dalton Academy and my family, and Kurt made me feel that for once I could be liked by someone for just being me. For just being Rachel. So when you came here with your beauty and sass and intelligence. I felt threatened! I mean you are so much more who he would want to be around! You are much more of a girl then I am! You are so full of life and love and beauty and fun and I...i'm not. Anyway, I just want you to know that i'm very sorry, Santana! I should never have been mean to you and not just here but at Dalton also! Everyone was always treating you like you were a whore or something and I was right there with them. None of us knew anything about you and we didn't even try to. You would think that I would've being that you and I were the only girls at Dalton and we are close to the same age. We could've maybe been friends a long time ago! That's one of my biggest regrets! I mean, I know what it's like to have people gossip about you behind your back and to think that they have you all figured out when they actually know nothing about you! To look at you like you're nothing but a freak and to condemn you for being who you are or who you can't help but to be! We all have a past and over half the time we had no control over what was happening in that past! I'm sure there's a reason you had to live at Dalton with Lady Sylvester for God knows how long instead of at your home with your family. Something happened in your past to bring you there and to make you who you are and I should've been there to befriend you instead of treating you the way people were treating me. I'm a hypocrite, Santana! I'm not a nice person! I'm selfish, hypocritical, demanding, and judgemental sometimes! I'm just so sorry that that's how i've always been to you! You've never done anything to me or anyone I know to have deserved that and i'm sorry! I hope that you can find it in your heart to forgive me someday even though I don't deserve it! I just want you to feel like we can be civil toward each other and that you can trust me. I'm not the same person I was! I hope we can be friends someday, Santana. I guess I just wanted to clear the air between us." Rachel was looking up at her with hopeful and sincere eyes and all Santana could do was stare back at her in shock.
She slowly sat down beside Rachel on the bench,"Thank you Rachel. I appreciate your apology and I accept it. I forgive you! And thank you for being honest with me! That means a lot! I guess you would understand more then anyone what it's like to be me. Also, you shouldn't feel bad about not talking to me at Dalton because I didn't try to talk to you either. I also made fun of you just as much as you made fun of me! So, I guess, that makes me a hypocrite to. We should've both tried to be friends a lot sooner! Our lives would've probably been a lot different if we had. Good or bad? I don't know but different. But all of that is in the past! However, I am sorry too Rachel! That I made fun of you, that I didn't try to talk to you and be friends, and that I made you feel jealous and insecure when I came here and became friends with Kurt. By the way, i'm no angel either, Rachel, as I said, i'm a hypocrite. I'm also selfish, bitchy, condescending, and judgemental. I'm also insecure which is why I do and say the horrible things that I do. I'm lost, Rachel! I lost my family and home when I was 8 years old. Sue found me after a raid where everyone but me was killed because I hid. My family were traveling gypsies originally from Cincinatti and you know how some people feel about gypsies. Well, these were the ones who didn't like gypsies and were out to destroy them all. Sue found me and took me back with her to Dalton where I have lived ever since. The only thing she expects from me as payment is to do absolutely everything that she says or else she will kick me out with nothing. So, I do what she says and I have a warm place to sleep, food to eat, clothes on my back, and someone to spend my life with. Sue Sylvester isn't much but she's something, closest thing i've had to family since I was 8. Besides, she took me in when she didn't have to and i'm eternally grateful to her for that. She could've left me to die of starvation or be taken to an orphanage or given me to a group of gypsy hunters to do with me what they will or sold me to the highest bidder. But she didn't! She took me into her home and cared for me and all I have to do is listen to her. Not everyone gets to be so lucky! I don't have to pay her back for the clothes, food, housing, or anything! I don't have to work for her either! She let me live a normal as possible life with going to school, dating, shopping, and more. She has never been ashamed of me or treated me as anything but what I am, her ward. I think that in her own way she cares about me to. I don't know. But that's the story. That's the mystery behind Santana Lopez and why she is living at Dalton Academy with Lady Sue Sylvester."
Rachel looked at her with a small smile,"Thank you for telling me even though you didn't have to, Santana. And I forgive you too! We were all way off by the way! No one would have ever guessed that that would be the story! There were people who said that you were the product of one of Sue's spells or that she had slept with some man and got pregnant with you or that you were some collateral she had to take from some poor family who couldn't pay for a favor she had done them or something. That last one had been my biggest guess by the way. I never would have guessed that she had saved you and taken you in out of the goodness of her heart! Wow! But you know that even though your family was taken from you, you're not lost, Santana. You and Sue are family and Dalton is your home! You have friends who love you! Kurt loves you so much and I know you're friends with Sebastian and he loves you to! And I care about you to! So maybe you don't have what everyone else has! So what! I don't either! I have two dads and a disabled brother! No mom! Until now, i've had only male friends! I never stay in one place to long and I act and am looked at as more of a guy then a girl. I understand what it's like to be different, Santana! And there is nothing wrong with you or what you have! I always look at it as at least I have something when I could have nothing! You should look at it that way to."
Santana beamed at the stunning creature in front of her. She really was such an amazing woman. "You're right, Rachel! I do have something! Maybe i'm not as lost as I thought." Rachel beamed back and they fell into a comfortable silence for a few moments.
Rachel was the first to break it,"So what did you bring me out here to talk about?"
Santana felt all of her nerves flood back in an instant. She took a deep breath and said the first thing that came to mind,"You know it's funny. Everyone thinks that roses are the only flowers that represent romance and love, but they couldn't be more wrong. Many flowers represent romance! Take for instance tulips and daisys.", she said with a flourish of her hand to the flowers around them,"Tulips represent perfect love and daisys represent love in its purest form. When you give someone a tulip, it's a great way to show them that they are your true love. If you give someone a daisy, it epitomizes your innocent love for someone. They are really the perfect flowers to have around when you plan to tell someone of your new feelings for them or that you think you could possibly be falling in love with them. Quite surprising that these insignificant flowers really hold so much meaning! They seem like one thing but are really another and no one really understands them unless they try. They are one in the same, believe it or not. Even their meanings go together. The tulip with it's perfect and true love and the daisy with its pure and innocent love. Very similar and yet still different. Whoever planted them here was wise, I think. Not many people would plant daisies and tulips together because they think that they will clash, but you and I are sitting here seeing, with our own eyes, that they are beautiful together. It's one of those you have to see it to believe it sort of things."
Rachel smiled,"I agree! They are amazing together! I'll admit that i'm one of those who would've thought that putting tulips and daisys together would be horrible! But I was wrong! How do you know so much about flowers?"
Santana smiled,"I'm Sue Sylvester's ward, remember? She is constantly using flowers and herbs for her spells and potions and I am usually the one who has to go out and find them if she doesn't have them right away."
Rachel let out an adorable giggle,"Right! Duh! As lovely as it is to talk about these gorgeous flowers, I know you didn't bring me out here for that."
Santana nodded and knew that it was now or never. She had wasted enough time. "Rachel, I have to tell you something. Something crazy. Something that I didn't realize until very recently but I should've a long time ago. Looking back on it now, i'm surprised that I didn't notice it. This might freak you out and maybe even make you feel uncomfortable, but I promise that neither of those things are my intention. I know that we just became friends and I really don't want to lose that and I can only hope that what i'm about to say doesn't push you away. I don't think I could handle that! I am so sorry for whatever discomfort this makes you feel, Rachel! But I have to be honest with you and with myself about this! Please don't feel any pressure to be anything you're not or do anything that you don't want to do to make me feel better! And please don't look at me or treat me any differently because of this! Also, one more thing, please let me say everything I need to before you say anything. Please? I promise that it won't take long! Oh! And please don't tell anyone! I'm not ready for everyone to know just yet. Sebastian and Kurt know but that's it. Not even Sue knows! And the major thing I have to tell you, no one knows except for me because like I said it is very recent. But I have to tell you!"
She looked up with nervous and pleading eyes at Rachel who looked confused and worried,"Of course, Santana! You can tell me anything! I promise that I will stay quiet until you've finished everything that you have to say and I won't tell anyone anything! Our entire conversation tonight will be between you and me and that's it! And I could never look at you or treat you differently no matter what you say! I'm not going anywhere! We're friends and that's not going to change! Don't worry! Whatever it is I can take it! It's allright!"
Santana let out a watery laugh,"I wouldn't jump too far ahead of myself if I were you. It's probably worse then you think."
Rachel put a hand on her thigh and squeezed as she looked at her with determination,"Try me!"
Santana sighed and turned her body completely toward Rachel whose hand was still on her thigh over her blood red gown,"Rachel, I'm a lesbian. I've known since I was 12. I didn't tell you this but another condition of Sue's to live with her was that I had to basically sleep with every guy who wanted me. Which is where my whore status comes from because that's exactly what I had been made into when I was 13. But I knew I was gay at 12 because I had lost my virginity to a kind and beautiful shop keepers daughter in Westerville who had befriended me for awhile. She was older then me by two years making her 14 and she knew what she was to. Well, our friendship went on for a few months and I was noticing things about her that I had never noticed about anyone else before. Eventually I told her and she told me that she felt the same and explained it all to me. Well, we had sex and it was great! She made it so that it would'nt hurt with a man if you catch my drift. We kept seeing each other and fooling around until one day when her father caught us. He kicked me out and they moved and i've never seen or heard from her again. So, time goes on and when I was 13 I was told to let the men have me. I wanted so badly to tell Sue about who I was and that I didn't want to do it but 2 things stopped me. One, I owed her and she had said to do everything she said or she would kick me out. And two, the girl who had explained it all to me had told me that it was often frowned upon and that I should keep it to myself unless I completely trusted the person. And I have never completely trusted Sue. I would be stupid if I did. So, I slept with many guys and I never completely liked it. Not the way I had with her. Even though some were good to me and some even put my pleasure first, it was all the same. So, to make sure that I really was a lesbian I would continue to hook up with women on the side and I liked it. All of my romantic and sexual dreams starred women. That's how I knew that I really was one. But, of course, I continue to do what Sue tells me to do. I won't for long though. I plan to very soon get a job or something and leave to start my own life and make my own decisions. It's a goal I have been working toward for awhile now and it's getting closer all the time. But despite being a lesbian and liking women, i've never really felt that spark with someone before. Until tonight.,"
She gave a pointed look to Rachel who had been listening intently with her eyes never leaving Santana's face,"When you walked into that ballroom tonight, Rachel, I finally felt that spark. You look so beautiful! And the two of us being out here talking and being honest with each other has made me realize that this is more then attraction. I'm not completely sure what it is but I do know that I have never felt this way before and I don't know what to do about it. When I was talking about the tulips and daisys I was talking about us to! We are the tulip and daisy, Rachel! We are so alike but so different! I honestly think that we could be perfect and beautiful together just like the flowers! We understand each other better then anyone could ever understand us. We are different Rachel! No one could ever love us more then we could love each other. We know how to treat each other. I'm not saying that this is love or forever or anything like that. But I do know that what I feel for you is real and I want to be with you someday. Of course, we have to get to know each other better first and be friends for awhile, but maybe someday. I also don't mean to overstep at all! I mean you probably like men and that's fine! I just really care about you and wanted to be honest. That's all. Again i'm sorry if i've made you feel uncomfortable in anyway,Rachel. And thank you for letting me get it all out before you say anything. I'm sure it wasn't easy. But i'm finished now so please feel free to say anything you want."
Rachel was staring at her with wide eyes and a slack jaw. Santana had never felt more terrified then she did in that moment. "Oh God! I shouldn't have said anything! She looks so scared and uncomfortable! Please Rachel? Please say something? Anything? Please? I'm so sorry!"
Rachel finally took a deep breathe and blinked repeatedly,"Wow! So I was definitely not expecting that! What to say?",she sighed and turned her body to face Santana's,"Look, Santana. I'm so touched that you have shared this big part of yourself with me and I won't say anything just like I promised. I also won't look at you or treat you in any different way. We're friends and that will not change! You haven't made me feel uncomfortable or disgusted in anyway, so please don't worry about that! You being a lesbian makes you no different to me. I'm also very flattered that you find me so appealing. You are very beautiful and amazing to! Also what you said about us being like the flowers was very sweet and romantic and I appreciate that. I think we could be amazing together! We are very similar but different and that means that we understand each other enough to take care of each other and be happy. However, I do like men. I'm sorry, Santana, but i'm going to have to say that we can never be together. But I appreciate you being honest with me and telling me how you feel. I want you to always feel like you can do that because you can! Are you allright?"
Santana was trying to force the tears back. She knew this would happen but it didn't make it any less painful. Plus, Rachel was being very nice about it and she wasn't losing her forever and for that she was forever grateful. "Yes. I'll be fine. We should probably get back inside before they worry about us.",Santana stood and began to walk back into the ballroom.
"Santana! SANTANA!",she heard Rachel calling after her but she couldn't stop.
Yes? No? Maybe so? Please let me know with a review! Cuddles and Cookies for all who do! :)