Disclaimer: i don't own harry potter, but i wish.
I jumped slightly, my hand sliding out of his, slick with sweat when the Healer walked in. I couldn't believe they weren't tired of me yet, i was here so often. They all gave me the same look, the pity one. Poor girl, her fiancee isn't going to wake up anytime soon. The bad thing was i was starting to believe them. It had been four long, gruesome weeks since his accident. I grasped my hand in his, squeezing it, just wishing he would squeeze back.
Sirius had basically moved in with me after that first night. The one night he hadn't been there I had woken up screaming. He wasn't what I wanted, just what I needed. I had to trick my mind into believing that the space next to me was going to be inhabited again, and by the right person.
He was slowly becoming my best friend. We leaned on each other for support. Who else could help? The best friend and fiancée. We didn't talk much at home. I cooked, he attempted to clean. He visited James at the hospital with me once, but said he couldn't bear to do it again and hadn't returned. But I was here every day, I had to be.
I looked up when the healer spoke. "His vitals look fine," she paused, looking down at her chart. "There's just no change."
"Then why isn't he waking up?" my voice cracked, stiff from disuse.
"Sweetie, I'm guessing he's blocking himself from waking up. Something inside his head is forcing him to stay quiet. When he's ready, he'll wake up."
"But, why?"
"It happens to a lot of wizards when something that traumatic happens. The magic rushes to the only safe place, the head, and shuts down the body. Its actually a fascinating topic. To wake up, the body has to want it, more than anything else. But he can hear you. He can most definitely hear you."
I nodded, and getting the hint, she left me to be alone with James. I sat there for a while, drifting in and out of sleep when my bladder decided it was time to get up. I let go of his hand, letting it fall to the bed, and stood up. My back cracked and I stretched my hands over my head. I exited the room, following the path to the bathroom. For a healing facility you think the bathrooms would be nicer. I did my business and washed my hands.
When I returned to his room there was no change. I re-grasped his hand, laid my head down and sank into fitful P.O.V.
I could feel a hand grasp mine again and my mind eased slightly. I hated when the had, it was the worst feeling. I couldn't actually feel the hand, or know who it belonged to, but my mind knew it was in mine.
My whole body was up here. It might have been comical if it wasn't so scary. A little man trapped behind bars while his body ruled on in its place. But it wasn't quite like that. As I had been continuously trapped here it was more like I knew that my whole being was just in my mind, paralyzing my body. But I had no idea why. I wanted to get out. With all my will I wanted to, but something was keeping me here, and I knew what it was. Up here, I was with my parents. Now I know that sounds crazy, but I was pretty sure I had gone crazy stuck here in my head. But being alone in my head, I was with every single memory. Every thought, touch, sound, taste was here and I could replay any single thing with one thought. I had already gone through most of my childhood. Small memories that I hadn't thought of in so long but were so important now that my family was gone. Back when I had first been stuck here, it seemed like an eternity ago, the memories had scared me and I had shied away from them, but now I embraced them. The first memory had been the best.
"Mum! Mum! Mum! Dad! Dad! Dad! Wake up! I get to go to Hogwarts! Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!" two shapes, under the covers started mumbling and grumbling as they slowly sat up. I sat on their laps, small eleven year old me. "Get up! We need to go to King's Cross!"
"James, we still have three hours before we need to get there sweetheart." My mum said, looking up at me. My dad grabbed his glasses from the nightstand.
"Do you want to make pancakes with me?" he said, cleaning off his glasses.
I gasped., so excited by this fact. "Yes! With chocolate chips?"
"Is there any other way?" mum said, giggling.
We got up together, each one grabbing each of my hands, and I pretended to be annoyed by the fact that they both were grasping my hands, when I was ultimately very happy. We went into the kitchen and made pancakes the muggle way, taking our time.
When we got to King's Cross I was so excited I could burst.
"Be good son. We're proud of you." dad said, and gave me a hug.
"I'm going to miss you so much. Be brave." mum said and gave me a kiss on the cheek. "I love you."
"I love you too!" and then I was racing to the train, so excited, when I turned back at the last moment, to see my dad with his arms around my mum. They looked so happy. and at that moment, so was I.
When I was thrown out of the memory, I was so confused, believing I was still eleven, and bursting with excitement ready to go to Hogwarts. I knew magic was going on, somehow. No way I could remember memories before I was seven, and yet I could here. I could remember everything. But something was missing. I was so depressed. I was with my parents yes, but there was something missing and I had no idea what. I knew my mind knew where or what it was, but it was blocking me from it, not letting me see the memories of it.
But I was going to see the memories today, I was determined. I had spent too long trapped here, and I wanted to see what was so important to me that I couldn't wake up. I thought of the wall and there it was in front of me, a huge brick wall staring back at me. I slammed my mind against it, trying to break it and shuddered.
I gathered all my magic and energy and with all my force slammed against it. It was the one that shuddered this time. But then two memories were in front of me. My mum and dad.
"James, don't you want to stay here with us?" mum said, her eyes teary.
"Yes James, stay with your parents. If you see what's beyond that wall, you won't ever get to talk to us again, not like this." my dad said, putting his arm around my mum.
"Mum, dad, you have been the best parents ever, but I have to know. I have to." I said, getting tears in my eyes too.
With that sentence they nodded and grasped hands, their bodies swaying back and forth, and then a bright light emitted from them and the wall. They walked forward together, into the wall and it burst forward in a brilliant golden light. And all of a sudden I was back to the Hogwarts Express.
A small boy with greasy hair sat opposite a girl with bright red hair and brilliant green eyes. He looked at the girl and said, "You better be in Slytherin." I couldn't help but say something at this point.
"Slytherin?" I asked, and the girl looked at me, her eyes meeting mine. "Who wants to be in Slytherin? I think I'd leave, wouldn't you?" I turned to look at the boy opposite me, Sirius was his name. We had just met, but he seemed cool.
"My whole family has been in Slytherin." he said depressed. I was shocked.
"Blimey! And I thought you seemed alright."
Sirius grinned. "Maybe I'll break the tradition. Where are you heading, if you've got the choice?"
I smiled and lifted an invisible sword in the air. "Gryffindor, where dwell the brave at heart, like my dad."
The greasy boy made a snorting noise and I turned to him, trying to impress the red headed girl. "Got a problem with that?"
"No." he said, his sneer getting larger. "If you'd rather be brawny than brainy…"
"Where're you hoping to go? Seeing as you're neither." interjected Sirius.
I burst out laughing when the girl sat up and looked at Sirius and then I in dislike.
"Come on Severus, let's find another compartment."
"Ooooooooo…" Sirius and I imitated her voice, but secretly I was admiring her brilliant eyes and the way she seemed to dance as she walked. They got up and walked passed us, I tried to trip Severus as he passed.
"See ya, Snivellus!" said Sirius and the compartment door slammed…
And the scene dissolved…We were older, around thirteen.
"Will you go out with me!" I asked Lily, that had been her name, as she sat down next to me in the first class of the day.
"No I will not! You're a bullying toe rag James Potter."
And the scene dissolved once more.
"I need your help." lily said, looking up at me. We were alone in the corridor, her facing me.
"What do you need?" I asked her. I would do anything for her, she didn't know it of course, but I would. She seemed nervous though, very nervous.
"I need you to kiss me." she said, she continued, rambling on about her boyfriend and being inexperienced but I had stopped listening after that first sentence. Lily Evans, going to kiss me? The one thing I had been yearning for since I had met her on the train that first day.
I responded, trying to sound like it wasn't a huge deal, trying to stay cool, calm, and collected. She explained her case some more, but I knew she was going to talk herself out of it, so I did the one thing I knew she never would. I leaned closer to her, cupping her face with my hands, and her eyes closed. I lean closer, caressing her face now.
"Are you sure?" I could care less if this ruined our friendship, maybe this would be a good thing. She nods, and I lean in slightly more, our lips almost touching, pause, making sure she wouldn't pull away, and when she doesn't, I lean in, my lips touching hers, and it's like nothing I could have ever imagined.
She moves her lips against mine, mimicking my movements and I know it's almost done so I do something reckless, sliding my tongue along her bottom lip slightly, making her shudder. And then I step back.
"Uhm, so how was that?" she seems so nervous, like Lily Evans could ever disappoint me. She's not looking at me so I stare down at her, waiting until she looks at me. When she does, I whisper to her. "You'll be fine when Michael tries to kiss you."
And then she's asking to do it again. Again! This is a dream come true. She says uhm about twenty times in the sentence and I can't help but smirk.
"You say uhm a lot." So cutely though. She draws her eyebrows at this, and I can see fiery little Evans is going to come up, so I cut her off crushing my lips to hers, and she falls silent, this time though, with a hunger so intense it almost hurts. It was the best kiss I had ever experienced, and I pulled on her bottom lip gently, trying to get her to open her mouth, and when she did, our tongues met, doing a slight frenzied dance. She was a natural, and I moaned against her mouth, wrapping my arms around her waist, and she pushes her hands through my hair. I'm trailing designs up and down her arms and she moans. This is brilliant. Amazing, but all too soon she pulls away, and it's over.
The scene dissolves.
"Lily Evans, I will love you unconditionally, every single day of forever. Will you marry me?"
"Yes, I will." and my life was complete.
I was thrown from these memories with a force. How could I forget Lily ever? Why would my mind block her from me? She was mine, and I was hers. I had to get out, had to get to her. With all my will and force I shoved my magic against the walls of my mind, trying to escape. And then I was falling, falling, falling. My eyelids moved. My real eyelids! They fluttered open, trying to block the light.
"L-lily?" I whispered. So it was her hand, of course it was her hand. It was always her. Will always be her.
"James?"
A/N: I know it's weird, but i wanted to show the struggle with James to get out of his coma. This is how i picture what happened to Arianna, all her magic rushing to her head, killing her, because she wasn't strong enough to contain it. I really hope you enjoyed this chapter! Reviews are always welcome, and thanks for the lovely reviews of the last chapter. SHOUTOUTS:
DarlingILoveYou: You cried! Thats so sweet
Loslote and Jade2nightwing: You two have been long time reviewers, thank you so much.
krush23:thanks for reading! I'm glad you liked it.
13Fiction: I know! Gasp.
MxLover5: i updated, just for you.
Kiley 1 09: Of course not! This is a James and Lily Fic. I'm saving Sirius all for myself...