Does anyone else think about life while in the shower? Well, while in the shower, I thought about Glee's cover of "Baby, It's Cold Outside", and viola, I thought of a new story. In the same second, I knew the summary and the title. It's called "The F Word".
25. Dad
Yes, figuratively speaking, she dug herself into a hole, a deep one at that, to the point where she could look up and could only see a glint of light the size of the point of a needle. She sat alone in her dim chasm as little chants and voices chattered constantly in her head, laughing at her, mocking her, mentally beating her. Ino wanted to give up and let the voices consume her into nothingness and become a hollow shell. However, an odd force pulled her away, away from melting down and burrowing deeper into her tunnel. Shikamaru and Sakura had their grip on her shoulders, holding her back. She let them, and that's when they began to build a ladder. But…
"Dad, can you please listen to me for a second?" Ino begged, following her father down the hallway. When she came into the kitchen that morning, he took one hard look at her, stood up, and left, stomping out of the room like he was a child being put in timeout. How could he be so immature about this situation? Last Ino checked, Ino was the child between the two. "Okay, how about a half a second?" she bargained as Inoichi rushed into his room and slammed the door in his daughter's face before she could wedge a foot between the door and the frame. "No," Ino called, "maybe a quarter of a second?"
No answer.
Inoichi, her father, refused to listen, speak, or look at her. She was a disgrace, nothing in his eyes. The look of shame plagued his eyes ever since Ino revealed the news. He shunned her, gave her the cold shoulder, and acted as if he wanted nothing to do with her, as if she was a failure. She wasn't though, but how could she show her father that?
This light that was so small that she needed to squint would still shine and grow. She could see it with the help from her friends, but her father's inability to accept her and the baby kept Ino distant from obtaining her light. His acceptance was essential for Ino to finally touch that light and feel its warmth against her skin.
"Don't worry about him," her mother soothed, smiling at Ino when she looked back at her mother. She placed a hand on Ino's shoulder and gave it a reassuring squeeze. "He'll be fine. He's just in shock, only finding out yesterday. Give him time, Baby."
Give him time? There was only so much time until she popped out this child!
Ino rolled her watering eyes. "What about you, Mom? Do you want me to leave?"
"No," she cooed, chuckling and wiping the dripping tears with her index finger. "Honestly, Ino, pregnant or not, twenty or two years old, I still have to take care of you. I guess that means I also have to care for my grandchild." Again, she set a hand on Ino's shoulder and guided her to the dining table where they sat next to each other.
Grandchild? That word sounded foreign coming out of her mother's mouth, like she was speaking a different language…or gibberish. The term made Ino quiver in displeasure as if the word was a nail scraping down a blackboard.
"So, what are your plans for the future?" she continued, replacing the sympathetic smile with a happier, more pleasant smile, the smile Ino was familiar with. "What kind of formula do you think you want to use? I can buy that for you. Do you plan to breast feed?"
Formula? Breast feed? What?
"Um, I don't really know. Mom, I don't think I want to keep it anyway."
Her mother hummed, leaning forward. "Why? Is it the father?" she pressed, earning a suspicious side glance from Ino. Her face was pure curiosity, but there was no doubt that she would inform Inoichi about what Ino said.
Ino pursed her lips together and waited for another question.
"How far along are you?"
"Twenty weeks almost," Ino answered, thinking about to her calendar that numbered off the weeks. She peeked at the calendar hanging on the refrigerator door. The days were crossed off in red ink. Looking at the calendar, she knew she forgot an important date, but what was it. Ino thought hard, staring at the calendar and visualizing her calendar at home. Interrogation was in two days. Shit.
"I never thought you'd be that far. When's your due date?"
"Sometime around October, I know that. They gave me a date, but Dr. Akanishi said that it could be two weeks prior or two weeks after, so frankly, the date isn't useful."
"I know, but the due date gives you a date to look forward to…kind of. The doctor told me my due date was October 23rd, and it turned out you decided to come out a month before. Honestly, when the baby wants out, it wants out, and there's nothing you can stop."
Childbirth didn't cross Ino's thought often because she had the goal of aborting it, but that turns out super well—in other words, for the sarcasm hinting inept, it was a failure. Ino now had one of two options: 1) Keep the child and learn to love it even though it would be a constant reminder of being taken advantage of and that the father was an S-ranked shinobi in the famous criminal organization, the Akatsuki; 2) Put it up for adoption, then she wouldn't have the burden of a daily reminder and stinky diapers. Also, she'd be able to live life as a normal twenty-year-old kunoichi.
Adoption sounded better of the two. However, wouldn't she feel guilty for giving it away? She's miss the opportunity to watch a child of her own grow and develop into a human being and possibly a great shinobi. Ino had to admit, with her brains and psyche abilities mixed with the Hidan's ability that Ino heard about, her child could become a gifted shinobi. Furthermore, her mother always wanted grandchildren and rooted Ino to have kids, so she could take care of them while Ino was away for whatever reason. She wanted to play with them, read books to them, and become their lovely grandmother. If she gave this baby away, Ino would take the privilege from her mom.
Ino wanted to punch herself in the face, but that would hurt, so she refrained. Instead, she listened tentatively to her mother babble about the times of Ino's babyhood and the baby bottles she recommended.
He was bored. Shikamaru yawned for the fifth time in that minute and stared at the paperwork that sat in front of his drooping head, on the verge of falling asleep. When Tsunade didn't order him to instigate mayhem and mischief in different village or plan strategies, he sits at a desk and does her paperwork, signing her signature—she approved of it—so many times that when he had to sign his own paperwork, he usually started writing her signature. At least, for such a lackluster job, she paid him well, sometimes better than missions.
Shikamaru signed the Hokage's signature on the final piece of paper and then sat there, wondering what he should do now that he finished his tasks. On days when Tsunade required him to be at a desk but gave him no paperwork to read and fill out, he twirled in his spinning chair, so that's what he did. Shikamaru glanced at the doorway and listened for any footsteps approaching before he tucked his knees into his chest and gave the chair a hard push from the desk, sending his chair spinning in dizzying circles. Just when Shikamaru could go for another round, he heard a chuckle.
Genma leaned against the door, grinning at Shikamaru, who dropped his legs from his chest and straightened his posture into a more professional stance. "Bored much?" the older man asked, still flashing that cocky grin. "Why are you still here, man? Shouldn't you be…well, not here?"
Shikamaru shook his head. "Nah."
Genma let the room fall silent for a long minute before he asked, "Did you hear Temari is coming into town soon?" Shikamaru swore Genma gossiped just as bad as girls, probably worse.
Shikamaru scoffed and rolled his eyes at his co-worker. "I signed her visitor's pass. Of course I know she's coming to town. What of it?" Genma wanted information that's what, and Shikamaru knew it.
"I just wanted to know your opinion. Last time I checked, you two were rather cozy with each other," he said with accusing eyes while he switched his senbon to the other side of his mouth. He grinned when Shikamaru looked up at him with lazy, tired eyes.
"Whether we're 'cozy' or not is really none of your business. It's not like that anyway, Genma." That was a lie. Temari and him have gotten very "cozy" in the past couple years. They've had their moments in his bed with the blankets covering their naked bodies with the summer night breeze blowing through his window, or they would cuddle under a tree when they should have gone over exam proctors. They've gotten "cozy" in the academy's closets—geez, they've violated so many closets…. Temari liked spontaneous sex, and Shikamaru couldn't complain. He was there to enjoy the ride.
"I get what you're saying."
"You do?"
"You can't be with Temari anymore because you're with that Ino chick, right?"
"Genma, you're nearly forty but you gossip like you're a sixteen-year-old girl. There has to be something wrong with that picture."
Genma sneered at the younger man. "I'm turning thirty-five, you prick. Anyway, so you are getting together with Ino?"
"I never said that."
"That's right. You avoided my question, so it must be right. I never guessed you'd be the one to go for pregnant women. I mean, she's a babe, but…she's pregnant, Shikamaru. What would the father think if he knew you were going after his girl?"
"The father has no problem with it at all," Shikamaru mumbled, glaring at Genma, who looked at him puzzled.
"Why?"
"Because I'm the father."
"You told him what?" Ino wanted—and Shikamaru desperately needed this—to slap Shikamaru so hard that his eyeballs switched sockets, his brain flipped around, and his nose winded up on the back of his head. What the hell was he thinking? How could he do that?
"Genma was being nosy and an ass, so I told him the first thing I thought of. Sorry, but now, the rumors about that pimp daddy getting you pregnant is cleared."
That was new. "Pimp daddy?" she asked, raising her eyebrows. "Really?"
"I've heard worse," he said.
"Don't bother." Ino already heard many rumors, despite not announcing her pregnancy, but her bump was what gave everything away. Walking through hallways and the streets, she listened to her colleagues whisper behind her back, gossiping about how Ino wanted a child so she went to a sperm donor, or how she didn't know who the father was because she sleazed around Konoha, or—this had to be the best on she's ever heard—Kakashi is the father. Ino couldn't wrap her head around the latter since she spoke to Kakashi rarely, but she had to admit to having a period of time when she lusted for the older man—really, she just lusted for older men but Kakashi was number one on the list, then it was Genma, but now after today, she wanted nothing to do with him! Anyway, those were all the normal rumors.
"Do you know what's gonna happen now?" Ino wailed, pulling at her short hair.
Shikamaru grabbed her hands and relaxed her fingers, prying her fingers out of her hair one-by-one. "I told you that stress isn't good for the baby. Can you calm down?"
"How can I calm down when you're such a dumbass? Now, everyone will talk about you behind your back! I hope you can handle it."
"I pretty sure I can handle it. As long as you know the truth, nothing else matters right?"
Ino never thought about it that way. She knew what really happened, but the rumors seemed better compared to the disgusting truth. Maybe she could delude herself into thinking Shikamaru did father the child, and everything would seem brighter, better.
"Do you want to go for a walk?"
Ino gasped mockingly. "Shikamaru wants to go for a walk? Am I dead? Pinch me." Ino held out her arm, waiting for Shikamaru to pinch it. He gave her a you're-kidding-me stare, forcing Ino to pinch herself. "Ow, I'm not dead," she mumbled while rubbing her arm over the red spot that formed on her forearm.
"I'm serious. Let's go for a walk."
"I'm pregnant. Do you remember what the doctor said? No physical activity."
"She said limit your physical activity, which I think is a paradox because she said you're okay to have sex, but it's not okay to go for a light walk?" Ino blushed at the comment, but she looked away, hiding the redness from her teammate. "Since when did you listen to what the doctor says anyway?"
"Since there's a person living inside me?"
"Has that ever stopped you from going on a silly walk?"
"I've never had a person live inside me before, so I wouldn't really know."
Shikamaru—Ino didn't see it coming—grabbed her hand and laced his fingers between hers, pulling her out her apartment and down the stairs. She felt the heat radiate between her fingers; suddenly, her hands was the hottest part of her body, palms pulsating against each other and sharing warmth. Ino needed to pull away and cover her cherry red cheeks away from him, but she didn't; she kept her hand there and even gently squeezed his hand.
She walked blindly, following Shikamaru and keeping her eyes glued to his sandals until she noticed the carpet that belonged to the lobby. Ino looked up and unclasped her hand from his, but she continued to walk closely behind him. He didn't look back to check on her, but he slowed down, waiting for her to walk beside him.
"Where do you want to walk?" he asked, glancing over his shoulder.
"You forced me to go for a walk. I thought you had a place in mind. Can we just go somewhere where no one can see us?"
"Why? Are you embarrassed people will see us?" he mocked. "Technically, according to our lie, we're together."
"That really doesn't mean anything," Ino mumbled, eyeing at a couple who walked past them. They smiled at her when Ino made eye contact with them, and instantly, their eyes trailed down to her stomach. Ino walked next to Shikamaru, blocking their view of her, and wrapped her arms around her midsection. "If you hadn't noticed, my stomach is huge, and people are looking."
"Isn't that natural?"
"Well, considering I haven't been pregnant before, I wouldn't know."
Shikamaru clicked his tongue. "You don't have to be a grouch."
"Sorry, it's the hormones."
"Whatever," he scoffed, rolling his eyes.
Ino rolled her eyes back at him. Why would a lazy oaf that considered everything troublesome want to be her child's "father"? The first time he mentioned the idea, she looked into his eyes and thought he was kidding, but she saw the seriousness in his coals orbs. He had no idea. Was his life so stress-free that he had to throw himself into another's burdens?
"So why would you want to be the father?"
Shikamaru's steps faltered, almost tripping over his feet. Ino shook her head as he gained his balance and jogged to catch up to her. Red tinted his cheeks and his eyes jumped from place to place as he thought of his answer. Did he volunteer without thinking? What an idiot.
"Y-You're my, uh, teammate and a friend. I just wanted to help out."
"That's kind of a stupid answer."
"You said the actual father was a horrible man. I thought about what you would say to people when they ask about the father. It's troublesome thinking about what to say, trying to make him sound like a decent guy. That's why. Because I know I'm a decent person, and you won't be so…afraid to say who the father was."
"So, until the day I die, you're my child's father? We'll lie to it?"
"Do you think the actual father is a person this child should know about?"
For a moment, she thought she could feel Hidan's rough fingertips trailing against her skin and gripping her hips. Her screams echoed in her head, pulsating in her ears. "No."
They walked onto an empty street that bordered the forest. Shikamaru grabbed her hand again. Ino wanted to pull away, but the warmth enticed her; she squeezed, receiving a gentle squeeze in return.
"You're only doing this because you're my 'baby's daddy,'" Ino accused, but she couldn't make herself to pull away from her teammate, who tightened his grip around her hand.
"Can we just walk? Don't think about it."
"Lady Hokage, I want to make a compromise. Please cancel my interrogation. If I may, in two days, I shall report to you every single event that has happened to me since I arrived in Kumogakure until the day I left."
"Why?"
"I'd like to keep it exclusive, between you and me. No one else."
"How could I possibly know that you aren't lying?"
"I have lost everything. I have nothing to hide now, so what would be the point of me lying?"
There was a pause, a pause that made Ino squirm in front of Tsunade's analyzing stare. "Be here, at my office by ten o'clock in the morning. If you're late, the interrogation is still on. Please leave now, you're cutting into my drinking."
Thank you for reading.
Have a fantastic day!