Disclaimer- I do not own Kingdom Hearts

Heartlessness

Chapter 5

Carnation

The day after the party, Xehanort walked past the garden to get breakfast. He peered outside and surprisingly saw no sign of Aerith. He shrugged it off. He believed she was probably still sobbing about the previous evening. He returned to his studies and thought nothing else of it.

The following day Aerith still had not returned. Xehanort would have asked his master why the girl did not come to work today but he did not really care. He quietly returned to his studies getting more work done than he had in the last few days.

However, when the week ended Aerith still did not return. Xehanort was sure she would have forgotten the party by now and determined that maybe she was ill. However, an entire month passed and she did not return. Xehanort claimed not to care but he had grown accustomed to their playful banter. Yet, he never asked his master nor did he plan to visit the girl because he found it to be too humiliating.

One day, Xehanort strolled the halls of the castle after working with his master on a biochemistry experiment. He took a snack from the kitchen before deciding to head to his room to study on his physics. As he passed the gardens, this time being purely coincidental since he had to pass them to return to his room, he caught someone out of the corner of his eye. He saw something pink moving between a set of hedges.

A smirked appeared on the apprentice's face. He entered the garden. He knew she would return. When he neared the hedges, the sound of garden equipment echoed. Turning the corner, he half expected to see Aerith crouched over the flowers and talking quietly to them. Yet to his surprise, he saw neither.

Instead of the brunette girl with emerald eyes clad in pink he was accustomed to seeing, he found a man with mass of wild pink hair. Xehanort quickly hurried away before the man could spot him. The apprentice hurried to find his master to acquire information on what exactly happened to Aerith. He was certain his master was still in the laboratory where they parted ways. When he arrived, his master was finishing cleaning up his notes and other documents.

"Master," Xehanort greeted politely.

Master Ansem was surprised to see his pupil. He carefully laid his notes down on his desk before giving his apprentice his full attention.

Not wanting to sound concerned over the girl, Xehanort asked something would give him the information he needed, without directly asking.

"There is a strange man in the gardens."

Ansem nodded, "He is our new gardener."

"New gardener?"

"Indeed, I had to employ a new one since our old one quit."

"Quit, why would she quit?" the apprentice inquired.

Master Ansem gave his apprentice a disapproving look. Xehanort felt his nerves shake as if he should know exactly why Aerith quit. However, his master was going to make it quite clear.

"She quit because of a very cruel apprentice of mine," Ansem stated. "Aerith came to me early in the morning the day after your insult and resigned. She said she could no longer feel comfortable working here. She handed in her letter of recognition and apologized many times for giving me no further notice. I tried to persuade her but it was a fruitless endeavor."

Xehanort swallowed a lump that had grown in his throat.

"If you knew of what I did then why did you not force me to apologize to her?" he asked.

Ansem snorted something he rarely did unless he was irritated.

"Because," he explained, "If I did it would be just as you said, forced. I do believe you should apologize to her however; I will not force you to. Instead, you will go of your own free will and sincerely apologize to her, if you wish."

He began to clear his desk again. Xehanort nostrils flared. He could not believe his master knew of this. All the other times he had been rude to Aerith his master reprimanded him. Then why not force him now? He turned to leave.

"Xehanort," his master called, "I also believe you are old enough to take responsibility for your actions."

Xehanort stormed into his room and frustrating slammed the door. He wished his master had forced him to apologize. It would have given him a reason to. He did not feel the need to apologize to her. They were not friends and he made it clear to her several times. He refused to apologize her and he would be damned if he did.

Weeks went by and Xehanort busied himself as much as possible. He did so by burying himself in books and working with his fellow colleague and master in the laboratory. It kept his mind off the little girl and life returned to normal. That is until one day when his master planned to leave for a trip to neighboring city. This left all his apprentices and colleagues with time off to relax.

The silver haired apprentice barred himself in his study in an attempt to keep his mind busy. It worked, for several hours until he found himself hungry. He knew if he went to the kitchen, he would walk past the garden so he ignored his rumbling stomach. It only lasted a half hour before the growling of his stomach became such an annoyance that he needed food.

He headed for the kitchen and kept his gaze from the garden. Yet, when he entered the kitchen, a vase stood on a table full of fresh flowers. Xehanort cursed and scurried from the kitchen with some fruit. He returned to his study and began to read his quantum physics book again as he nibbled on his fruit. Xehanort needed to get his attention off flowers. If he thought of flowers, he thought of her. If he thought of her then he would never be able to get any work done.

Burying his face in his book, he began to read the overly complicated book on quantum physics that any average person would probably be confused about. As he read he found himself being drawn out of his studious nature and began wondering which type of flowers were sitting in the vase in the kitchen.

Son of a…

Life was just too cruel. Xehanort tried his best to get the flower girl out of his mind but failed miserably. What made it worse is he did not understand exactly how this girl was able to infect him. She was like a plague that destroyed his mind and the only vaccine was, sadly, her.

Xehanort paced around his room, circling his desk a dozen times trying to come up with a plan. He knew sitting here and attempting to do work was futile. He had to see her. Yet, it was painfully obvious she did not want to see him… then again maybe not.

Who was to say she did not miss their talks and walks. He had grown accustomed to her so it was highly plausible she felt the same. Deciding immediately, he would go see her. It was already early evening and it would be a perfect time to go. Her little friends would be forced to come indoors and she would be walking home. She always walked home late in the evening.

Slipping out of the castle unnoticed, for the sake of his own pride, Xehanort cautiously walked the streets of Radiant Garden. He knew exactly which house belonged to Aerith since he did take her home several times. He only hoped he would not have to knock at the front door and ask to speak with her. The very idea of speaking to her parents would be awkward enough since he was older and she was merely a child in his eyes, despite being fourteen.

At the corner to the road to her home, Xehanort found no trace of her or any of her little friends. He wondered if she sat at home now or was on her way. However, before he could ponder a plan someone turned to corner from the opposite end of the street. The apprentice's eyes widened.

At first, he was unsure but on closer inspection, it confirmed his suspicion. Aerith walked down the street with her usual basket hanging from her arm. However, she did not wear her usual pink clothing, although the ribbon remained. Instead, she was wearing a blue and white sundress that was tight at the bodice but fanned out at her hips to her knee. Her usual brown boots replaced with white wedged heels.

Xehanort eyes followed her, unable to blink. Despite the minor change, somehow and someway she looked different. He could not complain about her overuse of pink now. Somehow, the minor changes made her look pretty. Her normal dresses hardly shower her legs, which seemed long and slender especially in such heels. Her skin looked insanely creamy and soft. She did not look like a child; she looked like a girl beginning her transformation into a woman. He was awestruck, to say the least.

As he watched, two children ran past toward Aerith. They chatted with her and she smiled. Aerith fumbled with her basket, searching within for something. She pulled out two flowers, one for each of them and the children handed her one munny. They thanked her before running off. The flower girl turned around to watch them run off.

Xehanort moved from his hiding place, moving silent like a cat as he approached her. When he stood only a foot behind her, he realized Aerith did not notice him. When she turned around, and nearly crashed into him, she jumped in surprise. Several flowers from her basket fell to the ground along with a few coins.

"Hello," Xehanort spoke.

"Hello," Aerith said quietly, before kneeling to the ground to pick up her things.

She tossed her munny into the basket and quickly collected the flowers into her hand. She stood up, without looking at the apprentice, and walked past him.

"Wait," Xehanort called after her. He spun around and took her by the shoulder, pulling her back.

"What do you want?" Aerith coldly asked.

"I came to see you."

Aerith made a noise before tilting her head to look at him. Xehanort, dropped his hand as her eyebrow lifted, indicating she was questioning his visit.

"You quit working for my master."

"Obviously," Aerith said, dryly. "Is that all?"

"Of course not," Xehanort answered. "I come to know to the reason."

Aerith laughed bitterly. "I would think you know the answer. After the way you treated me I have no reason to be anywhere near you."

"The way I treated you is the way I treat anyone who is not on my level."

"Then we have nothing more to talk about."

She began toward her home. Xehanort grabbed her by the arm, pulling her roughly back to him. Aerith gasped, stumbling backwards. She looked up at him, her eyes blazing. Xehanort reluctantly let go of her and Aerith stepped back.

"You know my master pays you well for your work and here you are selling a flower for one munny a piece. Do you think you'll be able to make a living like that?"

"Your attempts to convince me to return to my previous job are pathetic," Aerith said. "You think of me as an annoyance. I would think that you would be pleased."

Xehanort stared, trying to find the words to say. "You enjoyed working there."

Aerith nodded in agreement. "I did until someone decided to be a deceitful little worm. You only speak to me when we are alone or when no one can see us. You only want to talk to me when I convenience you!"

Aerith jabbed her finger into his chest as she said those words. The apprentice stepped back eyes slightly widening.

"Further more I do not want anything from you unless it is an apology," she snapped.

"An apology," the apprentice replied flabbergasted. "Why should I apologize to some foolish little girl like you?"

Aerith's eyes narrowed before she fished out a flower from her basket. She shoved it into his chest and Xehanort took it. It was a bright yellow flower with small petals and long slender stem.

"Since it seems the only way to get through to you is this way then I think this flower says everything." She turned her back to him and walked away. Yet, before she entered her home, she looked back at him, her eyes still glaring at him.

"It's a yellow carnation. If you want to know the meaning for it I'm sure one of your precious books can tell you what they mean. That is if you have the time for such trivial things."

Aerith entered her home and slamming the door behind her before locking it. Xehanort stared at the door for a long time before coming to his senses. He made an noise before spinning around and returning to his home. He slipped past any of the other residents of the castle and into his room where he locked the door behind him.

He dropped the carnation on his desk and pulled out a book entitled, Integrated Approach to Flowers. He flipped through the index until he found a page that would tell him about the flower. He flipped to the page and saw several photographs of different kind of the flower. There were several different colors and different forms. He easily found the yellow carnation.

His eyes traveled the paragraph telling the history and the care for the flower. However, he found his textbook to be no use in helping him in useless trivia. Furious, she slammed the book shut. Whatever Aerith meant by giving him this flower, he would not find in one of his book.

Yet, there might be someone who could.

Xehanort entered his master's garden. He peered around to find the single person who could possibly tell him what a yellow carnation meant. The new gardener was washing his hands and face. His shirt was wet from both sweat and the water he carelessly splashed on his face. His choppy pink hair matted to his head and cheeks. Xehanort approached.

"Gardener," he called, not caring for his actual name. "You know about flowers, correct?"

The man turned his head to see who called him. He disregarded the apprentice's rude behavior and the obvious answer to his question.

"Yes," he replied.

"Then tell me what a yellow carnation means in flower language."

As odd as the request sounded the gardener complied.

"It means disdain and rejection."

Xehanort hand tightened into a fist. He turned around, storming off without so much as thank you. The gardener shrugged it off and returned to his cleansing.

Xehanort stormed once again into his room, slamming the door again behind him. He picked up the carnation and tore it to bits, not caring that the pieces littered the floor of his clean room. He was beyond furious. She despised him and rejected him. She should have been grateful he even spared her a thought.

She should have been begging for his approval for his attention. She should have accepted his terms of their relationship, if he could even call it that. Any typical girl, in his opinion anyway, would be vying for his attention but this one was different. Aerith was completely different from other girls. She did not need a man or the approval of one. She was different and it was poison to him. It was becoming an infection, something he could not understand and seeing her tonight proved much more.

Aerith was not a little girl, she was becoming a woman and he could not help but notice how good she actually looked. He wanted her near him. It was a new concept that Xehanort could never learn from a book. Yet, she did not want anything to do with him and it enraged the apprentice. Rejected, he of all people was rejected.

He slammed his fist on his desk before pushing off the book he took out early. It collided against the wall before landing on the floor. Aerith may have rejected him but he would be damned if she would be the one to get the last say in this.

X, X, X,

Author Note- I'm sorry I have not updated this in such a long time. I had written this chapter and then it was deleted and I lost my motivation. However, I have returned and plan to continue this until it is done. Thank you for reading.