Deep within the core of the North Pole, obscured by the dank cloud of pollution released by Santa's Elven Correctional Facility, past the Graveyard of Anguish, atop the Cliffs of Torment, shrouded by mystery, guarded by Rudolph the 9-Headed Reindeer, lies a forest unlike no other, the Forest of L'ho'xl'ial'f. Unlike other forests in the world, this forest has the unique trait of being the only forest with a species not found anywhere else: Ents (tree people for those of you without any literary knowledge).
The Ents, with their hard wooden bodies, are a warlike race with many rigid laws erected in order to maximize their potential in the battlefield. Though the forests are without enemies now due to the utter eradication of the peaceful forest pixies, the Ents still spend all their days training for an eventual war which leaves very little time for any traditions. Despite Christmas quickly creeping throughout the North Pole, all the Ents continue to train. That is, all except for one.
Allen was never a normal Ent, his flaccid limbs and peaceful demeanour failing to be of any use in the fields of war. Unlike every other Ent during the Christmas season, every year Allen busied himself with Christmas, always attempting, and never succeeding, to bring the spirit of the season to the Forest.
This year though, Allen knew it would be different. Shortly before the Christmas season, Allen received a letter in his non-canon mailbox.
"Hmmmm," said Allen. "I have received a letter in my mailbox," said Allen. Allen opened the the letter he had received in his mailbox. Allen started to read the letter.
"Allen, I know your quest to bring Christmas back to the Forest of L'ho'xl'ial'f has failed year upon year. Enclosed are 2 sacks, each containing another safe and inside the safe, objects that will help you bring the 2 elements of Christmas back to the forest. Good luck."
Allen reached into the letter and withdrew the two sacks. The labels on the sacks said "Red" and "Green." Allen opened the sack labeled green first. Inside, he found a small box labeled: "DANK ASS SUPERMAN KU$H."
Allen rolled a well-packed joint with the ku$h he received. "Finally I have the green I need to save Christmas!" Allen then opened the sack labelled "Red." Inside, he found a white bic lighter. Using the lighter, Allen lit the joint. Allen was thrilled, "Finally! I have brought red and green back to the forest!" Allen was happier than he had ever been in his life and proceeded to smoke the joint that he had hoped for his entire life.
And that's when everything took a turn for the worse.
After smoking one marijuana, Allen felt afraid. After smoking two marijuana, Allen felt terrified. And finally, after smoking the third and final marijuana, Allen felt frightened. Allen picked up the lighter and stared at it, realizing what he had to do.
As the Forest of L'ho'xl'ial'f burned to the ground along with all its denizens, Allen wondered, what would life have been like if he had never opened the letter? What would life be like if he had never taken that puff? What would his life have been like without the marijuanas? But it was too late for the Forest and it was too late for Allen.
Deep within the core of the North Pole, obscured by the dank cloud of pollution released by Santa's Elven Correctional Facility, past the Graveyard of Anguish, atop the Cliffs of Torment, shrouded by mystery, guarded by Rudolph the 9-Headed Reindeer, lies a forest just like every other, the Forest of L'ho'xl'ial'f. Just like every other forest in this world, this forest is just a field of ashes. To this day, the people of this planet erect a tree every Christmas season so that Allen's drug addiction can be remembered and so that no more people will die to the dangers of marijuana.
Oh and one more thing. The name of this planet?
Earth.