Sorry about the snail-pace update. I was busy battling a bunch of walrus men for the last month or so.
...
Anywho, to make up for the long wait, I made this chapter extra long! Hope you enjoy!
Malon's Epic Cow Delivery
Ch 15: The Nintendo Baseball Classic
Even with her limited knowledge of baseball, Malon could tell that most games weren't played on a stadium floating in the middle of the sky. Indeed, the final match of the Nintendo Baseball Classic was being held in the Super Smash Bros. Brawl universe. In other words, the match was taking place at the world-famous Midair Stadium.
As soon as Malon, Nayru, and Yuna arrived, they could see that there was a long line of people at the entrance. However, once the crowd caught a glimpse of the Goddess of Wisdom, they immediately parted to let them through. Apparently, Nayru had a well-known reputation for smiting everyone within a mile radius if she grew impatient while waiting in line. Thanks to that, getting into the stadium was a cakewalk. Once they reached their seats, however, a different problem arose.
"Moo! How am I supposed to fit into one of these dinky little seats?"
Without a word, Nayru used her powers to turn a couple of the seats around them into a raised, rectangular platform that Yuna could lie on. Of course, the people who just had their seats disappear were less than happy about this.
"Hey! What's the big idea?" shouted a guy who looked suspiciously like the beggar from Kakariko Village. "I paid over a thousand rupees to see this game! I want my seat back right now, you blue-haired freak!"
Needless to say, the ER had a surprise visitors that day. Luckily for Nayru, none of the security guards bothered to arrest her seeing as how they were all afraid to even approach the violent goddess.
Meanwhile, Malon had to help Yuna get onto her modified seat. Several indignant 'moos' and swear words later, the farm girl finally succeeded in her task. After slumping down into her own seat, Malon took a good look at her surroundings. The three of them were seated on the eastern side of the stadium along with the rest of the Hylian fans. To the west was a large crowd of Toads, Piantas, Nokis, and other oddly-shaped inhabitants of the Mushroom Kingdom. As Malon continued to survey the area, her attention was attracted to the numerous vendors walking around the stadium with their strange goods.
"T-shirts! Buy your official Mushroom Kingdom Giants T-shirts here!"
"Looking for something to drink? Then buy some of our freshly squeezed Fairy Tears!"
"I got mushrooms for sale! Fresh mushrooms over here! I assure you, they're not illegal!"
Just as Malon was considering whether to buy something, Nayru shouted out to one of the passing vendors.
"Hey! I'd like one of those headbands with the Triforce symbols on it!"
"Sure thing! That'll be 250 rupees!"
"Can't you lower it to 150?"
"Sorry, but I can't do that. It's either 250 rupees or nothing."
Long story short, the ER got another visitor while Nayru got her headband. By now, most people had moved off so that there were a safe distance between them and Nayru. For the next several minutes, things were relatively calm. However, it soon became clear that the goddess was getting tired of waiting.
"When's the game going to start?" Nayru complained. "I'm getting sick of sitting around with nothing to do!"
"Umm... I'm sure it'll start soon enough," Malon cautiously replied.
"They better! And where are those commentators? It's about time they gave an overview of all the games so far!"
"Commentators?" Malon asked.
"They're people who narrate the games for you," Nayru explained.
"Oh. So they're kinda like the author who's narrating everything we're doing right now?"
"What?"
"Never mind."
"Okay... Anyways, I'm just hoping that the commentators for this match isn't..."
"Welcome to the final match of the Nintendo Baseball Classic! I'm Master Hand here with my good friend Crazy Hand at the Midair Stadium!"
"...them," Nayru finished with a face-palm.
"I must say Crazy, I've never seen a match more highly anticipated than this one!" Master Hand said through the speakers.
"Mwah ha ha ha ha! You're absolutely right, Righty! Even I'm twitching with anticipation! No, wait. I think I'm just having another mental breakdown."
"Oh, crap! Hurry up and take your medication before the game starts! I don't want a repeat of the Dreamland/Mushroom Kingdom game!"
"Mwah ha ha ha ha ha! Yeah, I think your right about the medication. Please excuse me while I step out for a moment. In the meantime, Righty will entertain you with his stand-up comedy routine!"
"Wait, what? Hey, come back here! Umm... Soooo... What do you call a... Quick! Cut to the commercials!"
Tired of getting mauled to death by Cuccos during your adventure? Then try the brand-new Cuccos Begone spray! Made by the people that brought you Tektite Begone and Moon Begone, Cuccos Begone guarantees results in as little as five minutes! Just spray yourself with the patented formula and you'll be able to ward off every single Cucco that approaches you!
Warning: Side-effects include itching, burning, runny noses, explosive diarrhea, implosive diarrhea, loss of sight, loss of hearing, loss of sanity, and attraction of bears.
Cuccos Begone! Find one at a store near you!
"And we're back baseball fans!" Master Hand proclaimed. "There's still a few minutes before the players make their way to the field so let's quickly go over some of the highlights of last week's game! Play the video footage Crazy!"
The enormous screen located at the north end of the stadium suddenly lit up, showing a video clip of Mario scoring a home-run with a flaming bat.
"Look at that swing!" shouted Crazy Hand. "I have to say, Mario's fifth inning home-run against the Mute City Cardinals pretty much confirmed the Mushroom Kingdom Giants' place in the finals! What an intense game!"
"Right you are, Crazy! Despite a few early losses, the Giants still managed to plow on through to the finals! I guess they're known as the All-Star Sluggers for a reason! You know, I think everyone was expecting them to make it all the way here!"
"Of course they were! On the other hand, I don't think anyone was expecting this!"
The screen now showed Vaati (in sorcerer form) pitching a curveball to a Waddle-Dee. The orange puffball tried and failed to hit the ball with its bat, causing him to strike-out.
"Talk about a dark horse! The Hylian Dodgers was one of the last teams that I thought would make it to the finals! And yet, here they are!" Master Hand commented.
"Indeed, Righty! It seems the massive change in its players paid off! From what I know, almost every member of the old team was fired. It seems Rauru, Darunia, and Saria are the only players that managed to stay on the current team!"
"Talk about a big switch! But like you said, it paid off in the end! I'd say... Hold on. It appears that both teams are about to make their entrance right now!"
As Malon and the thousands of other fans watched, two large groups of people were suddenly warped into the center of the stadium. As expected, the entire stadium erupted in cheers.
"And it seems they're all here!" Crazy Hand shouted over the cheering. "On the side of the Mushroom Kingdom Giants are: Mario, Luigi, Peach, Daisy, Yoshi, Bowser, Wario, Waluigi, and Toad!"
The Giants, who were all wearing red, gave a wave to their fans causing the western side of the stadium to cheer louder than ever before.
"And challenging the Giants for the championship are the Hylian Dodgers! Give a round of applause for Rauru, Darunia, Saria, Vaati, the Happy Mask Salesman, Majora, Marin, Ooccoo, and Ghirahim!"
While the other Hylian fans went into a cheering frenzy, Malon turned to look at her aunt with a criticizing stare.
"Why does that Marin girl look like me from a different LoZ game?" Malon asked.
"Umm... I don't know what you're talking about."
"Aunt Nayru..."
"Oh, alright! I was sick of our team always losing so I persuaded Farore to find us some decent baseball players even if she had to break the 'no going into different LoZ dimensions' rule. From the look of things, it seems that she decided to travel through time as well to pick up Ooccoo and Ghirahim."
"How did you persuade Aunt Farore to do that? I thought she was the strict, live-by-the-rules type of person?"
"Pfft. You apparently need to spend some more time with Ms. Let's-give-Link-the-powers-of-a-god."
"What?"
"Nothing. Anyways, in answer to your question, I persuaded Farore to break the rules by solving one of those annoying Professor Layton puzzles for her."
"She's still playing that game?" Malon asked with a sigh.
"She got the new one that just came out."
As Malon began shaking her head in an exasperated way, the Mushroom Kingdom Giants took up their positions on the field. Meanwhile, the Happy Mask Salesman came out to home plate with his oversized backpack still strapped onto him.
"Alright, Crazy! It seems that both teams are ready to begin! Pitching for the Giants is Mario himself! Starting things off for the Hylians is the enigmatic Happy Mask Salesman! You know, Crazy, it's been a while since we last saw the HMS on the field!"
"Indeed, Righty! The last game he was in was the Hylian vs. Dreamland game! From what I remember, he was the one who scored the final home-run for his team!"
"Let's see if he can pull off another one of those! By the way, Crazy, why hasn't the umpire shown up yet?"
"He said he had some business to take care of. Something about getting his chain-whip fixed... Wait! Here he is now! Give it up for... Tabuu!"
There was some mild applause as the blue, Subspace entity warped into the field. After acknowledging everyone with a wave, he created multiple copies of himself so that his clones were covering every base on the field. After the main Tabuu took up his position behind Bowser (the catcher), he gave a nob.
"Umm... Crazy. I think he's signaling for us to begin the game."
"Oh, right! I forgot he never talks. Okay. PLAY BALL!"
As everyone in the stadium watched, the HMS magically conjured up a baseball bat into his right hand. Meanwhile, his left hand was busily digging around in his giant backpack. After a while, he managed pull out what looked like a pair of yellow bunny ears and placed them on his head.
"And so it begins, Righty! The excitement is starting to make me... twitch... again... Mwah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! I love pickles!"
Master Hand gave an annoyed sigh before saying anything.
"Please excuse me while I take Crazy out for his medication."
"Hey, Righty! If we're giant, floating hands, how are we talking right now? Balapalooza!"
"Just start the game without us..."
"Rainbow unicorns for the win!"
The entire stadium was filled with an awkward silence as the sounds of Master Hand dragging away Crazy Hand faded into the distance. However, the silence was immediately broken when Mario decided to pitch the ball while the HMS was distracted. Tabuu immediately gave the signal for a strike while the Hylian side of the stadium rose up in outrage.
"You cheating plumber!"
"Death to the overweight mushroom-addict!"
"Go back to the sewers, you cheater!"
The shouting soon came to an abrupt end as Mario threw the ball once again. This time, however, the Happy Mask Salesman was ready.
With an almighty swing, the HMS sent the ball flying towards second base. Unfortunately, the hit was far from a home-run and Yoshi had positioned himself directly beneath the falling ball. In a miraculous turn of events, however, Yoshi failed to catch the fly ball. As it turned out, having an abnormally large nose in the front of your face had an adverse effect on one's vision. By the time Yoshi managed to find and pick up the ball, the HMS had already scored a run for the team. Mario was seen throwing his hat onto the ground in frustration while the Hylians erupted in cheers.
Unfortunately, the rest of the inning turned out to be a complete disaster for the Hylians. Following their early lead, Darunia, Marin, and Rauru all struck out. Once Mario and pals got up to bat, things only got worse. The Hylians suffered a home-run from Bowser, Wario, Luigi, and Mario before finally getting a field switch. By the end of the first inning, the score was 1:4, with the Giants pulling a huge lead. To make matters worse, Master Hand and Crazy Hand returned just as Saria was preparing to go up to bat.
"And we're back everyone!" Master Hand shouted out enthusiastically. "Let me just take a look at what's happened so far... Wow! Talk about an epic fail for the Hylians! I mean, really? 1:4 after the first inning? I don't think I've ever seen such a disadvantage this early on in the game!"
Everyone on the eastern side of the stadium turned to glare at the commentators box... including a certain goddess that just happened to have the power to shoot laser beams from her eyes. After the fire was put out, Crazy Hand continued with the commentary while Master Hand was out getting his third degree burns treated.
"Ahem. Let's get back to the game, shall we? Okay, it seems Saria is now batting for the Hylians at the start of the second inning! From the looks of things, the Hylians are trying to get Saria to first base using her tiny strike zone!"
Just as Crazy Hand predicted, Saria did get a walk after Mario failed to strike her out four times in a row. As soon as Saria took up her position on first base, Ooccoo got up to home plate while holding the bat in her mouth.
"It looks like the Hylians are going to use the same tactic twice in a row! It seems the Hylians are trying to load up the bases and then score a home-run to gain the lead once more! But I wonder if their plan will work against an elite team such as the Giants?"
As it turned out, the Hylians had nothing to worry about. Just like with Saria, Ooccoo got a free walk to first base thanks to her tiny size. With that, Saria was now on second with Ooccoo positioned at first.
"I'm not getting paid enough for this," Master Hand was heard saying as he returned to the charred commentators box. "Okay, Crazy. Fill me in on what's happened so far."
"The Hylians have their players on both first and second base! It seems Majora is getting ready to either load up the bases or score an equalizer for the team!"
"Ah. Okay, fans! It seems Majora is stepping onto the plate right now!"
Majora (in his mask form) gave a wave to the crowd with one of his many tentacles causing the Hylians to yell out in excitement once again. As soon as the crowd calmed down, Majora picked up the bat with two of his tentacles and took on his batting position.
"Here's the pitch! Majora takes a swing and... Strike one! Oooh! So close! I thought for sure that was going to be the equalizer! Okay, Mario's throwing his second pitch! It's a mean curveball! Majora takes a swing once again! It's... a hit! It's going... going... and it's a foul."
The Hylians all let out a simultaneous groan of disappointment as the ball flew off into the foul zone. Despite his horrible luck so far, Majora didn't seem fazed at all. He merely shook his head/body and took up the bat once more.
"I think this could be it folks!" Master Hand shouted. "It looks like Mario's going to end this with his flaming fastball!"
True enough, Mario was now holding a flame-cloaked ball in his hand. After giving Majora a sneer, the Italian plumber threw the ball with incredible speed. In fact, the ball flew off so fast that it looked like a blur even to Malon and Nayru. Luckily for the Hylians, however, Majora had a trick of his own ready. As soon as the ball left Mario's hand, Majora unleashed a wave of dark energy at the incoming projectile. Just like Majora had planned, the magic attack managed to slow the ball down just enough for him to actually see it. Without a moment's hesitation, Majora swung the bat with all the force he could muster.
"It's a hit!" Crazy Hand yelled out. "It's going... going... GONE! I don't believe it! The Hylians have tied the score 4:4!"
The cheering from the Hylians was so loud that many of the Mushroom Kingdom fans had to cover their ears to prevent themselves from becoming deaf. The cheering only increased in volume as Majora waved all of his tentacles to the crowd as he made his ceremonial lap around the bases.
"Holy Palutena! Is this really happening Crazy? Did the Hylians really just score an equalizer against the Giants?"
"I believe so Righty! It seems the Hylians actually have a chance at winning this!"
Once Majora returned to the dugout and the cheering had somewhat subsided, Ghirahim picked up his bat and made his way to home plate.
"Alright, Crazy! Let's see if the Hylians can follow-up that spectacular performance and pull out a lead! Heading onto the field right now is the Demon Lord himself! Everyone give it up for Ghirahim!"
Numerous cheers and boos were heard in response to Master Hand's comment. Ghirahim merely gave a yawn to all the noise and took up his position with a bored expression.
"It seems everyone's ready!" Crazy Hand narrated. "From the looks of things though, I'd say Mario's still a little shaken up by Majora's home-run! I wonder if he'll be able to pull himself together in time?"
"It looks like we're going to find out, Crazy! Here's the pitch! It's... way off to the right. Ball one!"
"I'm not sure if that was intentional or not, Righty! Well, we'll find out soon enough! Here's the second pitch! And... its way off again. Ball two!"
"What a turn of events! The Mushroom Kingdom Giant's star pitcher just can't seem to get it together! What's even more surprising is that Ghirahim's been taking a nap this whole time!"
Apparently, one of the benefits of being an almighty Demon Lord was having the ability to sleep while standing up. After Mario's first failed pitch, Ghirahim lost interest in the game and had fallen asleep while still holding his bat up.
"Well... this is a rather interesting tactic," Master Hand continued. "Perhaps Ghirahim's planning to walk to first base just like Ooccoo and Saria! Either way, Mario's not looking very happy right now! It seems he's rather ticked off by the fact that the batter fell asleep on him!"
Like Master Hand had commented, Mario was glaring at Ghirahim with a look of utter contempt. Suddenly, the plumber gave a loud yell as he threw the ball straight towards Ghirahim's face. Just before the ball made contact, however, Ghirahim (who was still asleep) moved up his hand to scratch his head. As fate would have it, the slight shift in Ghirahim's movement positioned the bat so that it was now right in front of his face. As a result, the ball bounced off the bat rather than hitting its intended target. To add to the strangeness of the situation, the bat ricocheted backwards to Ghirahim's head after being hit by the ball, giving the Demon Lord a rude awakening.
"It's a bunt! But it looks like either Ghirahim's not fully awake yet or he's not interested in running at all!" Crazy Hand shouted in a rush. "Bowser dives for the ball! He's got it!"
"I don't believe it Crazy! Ghirahim still hasn't moved an inch! What's he planning to do?"
"It doesn't look like he's going to do anything! Bowser tags him out!"
The Mushroom Kingdom fans all began to cheer and laugh at Ghirahim's laziness while the Hylians just stared at their batter with disbelief. Before any of the Hylians could say anything though, Ghirahim simply gave another yawn and walked over to Tabuu and whispered something to him. Tabuu immediately nodded and signaled to the two commentators.
"It seems the umpire wants us to go over the video of everything that's happened with the last hit!" Master Hand stated with a hint of confusion in his voice. "Well, you heard the man! Play the tapes, Crazy!"
Everyone turned to see the video of the last few minutes being played on the stadium's big-screen. At first, nothing seemed out of the ordinary as the video showed Bowser tagging Ghirahim out. At that point, however, Tabuu suddenly began to motion something to the two hands.
"Play it in slow motion?" Crazy Hand asked after seeing Tabuu's sign language. "Okay..."
Crazy Hand rewound the tape until it showed the ball bouncing off of Ghirahim's bat. With a press of a button, Master Hand started the video at a fraction of the original speed. What everyone saw next left them all speechless. As it turned out, Ghirahim had actually scored a run for the Hylians. By using his ability to teleport, he had actually warped to each and every one of the bases in the blink of an eye.
"Holy Maxim Tomato!" Master Hand blurted out as he realized what he was seeing. "Hey, Crazy! Is this run even legal?"
"I'm not sure, Righty. But it seems Tabuu's calling this a fair run!"
As the truth slowly dawned on the audience, the Hylian fans rose from their seats and began cheering like a bunch of maniacs. On the other side of the stadium, the Mushroom Kingdom fans rose up in protest and began complaining about how the run shouldn't be counted. In fact, Daisy actually approached the Tabuu closest to her (the one on second base) and began shouting at him. Unfortunately for her, Tabuu wasn't the type to tolerate players that questioned his call. Before Daisy could finish her insults and criticisms, Tabuu pulled out his chain-whip and lassoed the princess with it. In the blink of an eye, Daisy was thrown clear out of the stadium as Tabuu calmly put away his whip as if nothing had happened. All of the complaints immediately ceased after this.
"Ouch! It looks like Daisy found out not to mess with the umpire the hard way!" Crazy Hand narrated. "But what will the Giants do without one of their players?"
"It looks like they're requesting a time-out while they go out and retrieve their player!" Master Hand replied.
After a lengthy debate between Mario and Tabuu, the Giants received a fifteen minute time-out. Meanwhile, the fans used this time to take a breather from all the excitement that had been going on.
"Well, I'm going to get something to eat," Nayru told her niece as she got up. "You want anything?"
"No thanks. I'm good," Malon replied.
After Nayru left, Malon looked over to see how Yuna was doing. As expected she was fast asleep in her seat/platform/thing. Figuring that waking up Yuna wouldn't be such a good idea, Malon decided not to bother her. However, just as Malon was about to turn away, Yuna began muttering in her sleep. Curious, Malon leaned in closer to hear what Yuna was saying.
"zzz... this is... my story... zzz"
"Even in her sleep she's vain," Malon muttered while shaking her head.
Yuna offered no reply as she continued on sleeping. Knowing that there was no point in listening any further, Malon turned around and scanned the area for anything interesting to look at. As she looked over to her right, she noticed that the person sitting a few seats across from her was reading a newspaper. Normally, this wouldn't have interested her in the slightest but the large headline on the front page instantly caught her attention.
"What the...? Umm... excuse me sir. Can I take a look at the newspaper for a sec?" Malon asked.
"Huh? Oh, sure," the man (who looked suspiciously like the postman) answered as he handed over the papers.
Malon immediately flipped over to the front page and read the headline.
DK Island Destroyed By Unknown Terrorists
The rest of the page went on to detail how the entire island was obliterated by a group of mysterious figures wearing dark cloaks. Apparently, a crew member from a nearby merchant ship managed to take a picture of the supposed terrorists moments after the island was destroyed. Even with the poor picture quality, Malon could see tell that there were seven figures standing at one of the ruined docks of DK Island.
"Weird, huh?" the postman look-alike asked once Malon handed back the newspaper."First some nut-job decides to kill Fox and Kirby, and now this happens. Sometimes I question what this world is coming to."
Unfortunately, any further discussions were halted as Nayru reappeared carrying a mountain of hot dogs, pizzas, and hamburgers.
"What?" Nayru asked when she noticed Malon staring at the food pile with an open-mouth. "I was hungry."
The Mushroom Kingdom Giants returned to the stadium soon after that. As it turned out, Daisy had somehow survived the fall to the ground albeit with some minor cuts and bruises. All in all, she wasn't seriously hurt but she was seen glaring death at Tabuu for the rest of the game.
"Alright, fans! It looks like we're good to go!" Master Hand declared. "The score is currently 5:4 with the Hylians in the lead! Can the Hylians continue their winning streak or will the Giants turn this game around?"
"Let's find out, Righty!" Crazy Hand replied. "Play ball!"
(Author's Note: I'm too lazy to write out a full game so I'll skip ahead a bit. Just be glad I didn't do what the fourth Harry Potter movie did to the Quidditch World Cup. Honestly, what was the point of setting up the entire event if they weren't even going to show the game at all? Ahem. Yeah, I should stop ranting now. Anyways, back to your regularly scheduled program.)
"This is it fans! It's the bottom of the ninth and the Hylians are leading with a score of 79:78! The Mushroom Kingdom Giants currently have two outs with Peach at second base! Coming up to bat now is Mario himself!" Master Hand commentated.
"This is it, Righty! It's the moment of truth! Will the Giants win their tenth championship trophy or will the Hylians actually win this year's Nintendo Baseball Classic?"
"Wait a second, Crazy! The Hylians are pulling out their current pitcher!"
"What? Why would they take out Rauru at a time like this? He's been throwing strike after strike for three innings in a row!"
"I don't know but it seems like many of the Hylian fans are agreeing with you, Crazy! Just listen to that uproar!"
"It seems that... hold on a second! Is that who I think it is?"
"Purple shirt, purple hat, pale skin... GREAT FLYING ALPACAS! It's the Hylians' ace pitcher! It's... VAATI!"
As expected, the Hylians went nuts as the dark sorcerer made his way to the pitcher's mound. After picking up the ball, Vaati gave a complimentary wave to the crowd as well as blowing a few kisses to some of his lucky fangirls. As fate would have it, one of the people that Vaati aimed his kiss at was Nayru herself. However, instead of vaporizing the sorcerer, the goddess actually started giggling like a typical fangirl at Vaati's gesture.
"Er... Aunt Nayru? Are you blushing?" Malon asked in confusion.
"Huh? Oh, of... of course not!" Nayru replied in a very flustered way.
"Then why are you suddenly waving around that banner that says 'I LOVE YOU VAATI!' written on it?"
"Umm..."
Nayru was spared a response as Master Hand and Crazy Hand continued on with their commentary.
"I don't believe what I'm seeing here, Crazy! I thought Vaati injured his arm after pitching for five consecutive innings at the last game!"
"It seems that he's made of stronger stuff than we gave him credit for! But from the way he's holding the ball, I'd say he's still a little sore from his previous ordeal! Can Vaati actually take out Mario in his current state?"
"I honestly don't have an answer for that, Crazy! The only thing the Hylians can hope for now is that Mario is equally tired as well! But from that aggressive stance that the plumber's using right now, I'd say that hope is rather far-fetched!"
"Either way, it all comes down to this!"
"Alright folks! This is the beginning of the end! Here's the pitch! And it's... Ball one! It seems Vaati's trying to play mind games with Mario right now! But will it work?"
"Looks like we'll find out soon enough, Righty! Here's the second pitch! It's... a hit! The ball's heading towards third base! This is going to be close! It's... it's... a foul!"
All of the Hylians let out a sigh of relief while the citizens of the Mushroom Kingdom let out various sounds of disappointment.
"That was close, Crazy! I'd say it was only about a foot away from a home-run!" Master Hand reported.
"It seems the Hylians got lucky there, Righty! Let's see if their luck holds, though! Anyways, here's Vaati with the third pitch! It's a far one to the right! Mario doesn't take the bait! Ball two!"
"Vaati must be really pressured right now! With only a single strike, Mario definitely has the advantage here! I wonder if Vaati can even muster up the nerve to throw the ball into the strike zone right now?"
"If he wants to win, he better! Here's the next pitch! It's... Strike two! Mario swung too early!"
"It looks like Vaati's not going give Mario a chance to compose himself! He's already winding up for another pitch!"
"It's... Ball three!" Crazy Hand shouted out.
"This match is really coming down to the wire! You can actually feel the tension in the air, Crazy!"
"Indeed, Righty! With a 3-2 count, this next pitch will definitely determine the winner of this game! But with Vaati in such poor shape, can he actually throw out a strike?"
"I doubt it, Crazy! It seems the Giants are... Wait a second. Is it just me or is Vaati... glowing?"
As everyone watched, dark energy began to gather around Vaati until his whole form was hidden inside a veil of darkness.
"Umm... what's Vaati doing?" Crazy Hand asked.
"I don't..."
Master Hand was cut off as the dark energy around Vaati exploded outward. As the audience watched with their mouths open, Vaati revealed his new form with an unsettling laugh. Standing in the sorcerer's place was a gigantic eyeball with two, clawed arms made up of shadowy balls of energy.
"It's Vaati's Wrath!" Crazy Hand shouted as Vaati infused the baseball in his hand with the same dark energy that cloaked his entire body.
"I haven't seen him take this form since the game against the Earthbound Sox!" Master Hand declared in a nervous tone.
"And for good reason! The last time he took this form, the entire stadium was destroyed!" Crazy Hand replied in panic. "Everyone run for your lives!"
Just as everyone in the stadium began to make a mad dash for the exit, Vaati threw the ball. To everyone's surprise, Mario didn't flee in terror at the sight of a gigantic eyeball monster hurtling an energy-infused baseball at him. Instead, the plumber used his powers to set the bat on fire as he waited for the ball to reach him. Moving faster than anyone could believe, Mario managed to make a hit. As soon as the bat made contact, an enormous explosion occurred which blasted anyone standing off of their feet.
"HOLY NARWHALS! HE ACTUALLY HIT IT!" Master Hand quickly shouted as he returned to the commentators box. "THE BALLS SAILING PAST SECOND BASE WITH NO SIGN OF STOPPING! THE GIANTS HAVE WON THE...!"
Master Hand's call turned out to be a little too preemptive. Just as the ball was about to cross the boundary of the stadium, it was blocked by the most unexpected of things: a seagull. Indeed, the ball crashed into the bird midair and fell directly into the Happy Mask Salesman's waiting glove. The entire stadium became absolutely silent as they tried to make sense of what had just happened.
"Who...? How...? Where did that seagull come from?" Crazy Hand managed to ask after a few seconds.
His question was answered as the aforementioned seagull flew over and landed at the pitcher's mound. Before everyone's unbelieving eyes, the seagull transformed into a very concussed Marin. Even in her injured state, she still managed to raise up a hand and make a victory sign before falling over.
"I... I don't believe it!" Master Hand shouted out into the silence. "It seems Marin actually had the ability to turn into a seagull! But... but that means..."
"THE HYLIANS HAVE WON THE NINTENDO BASEBALL CLASSIC!"
As the realization of this fact sunk in, the Hylians practically exploded. They began cheering and celebrating like a bunch of maniacs. In fact, the noise got so loud that some of the R.O.B.s on the Isle of the Ancients exploded from the intensity of the sound.
"WE WON! WE ACTUALLY WON!" Nayru yelled as she began dancing around in joy with the postman look-alike next to her.
Even Malon couldn't stop herself as she began shaking Yuna while shouting "WE WON!" over and over again.
"MOO! WHAT'S HAPPENING?" Yuna yelled in shock after being so abruptly awakened.
"I'LL TELL YOU WHAT HAPPENED! THE HYLIANS WON THE GAME!" Malon shouted as she began hopping up and down in her excitement.
"So its finally over. Ugh. I thought it would never end," Yuna replied in her usual sarcastic tone.
Malon paid little attention to her as the entire Hylian team assembled around Marin. After seeing that she was alright, they lifted her up onto their shoulders and began celebrating with the rest of the fans.
After a few more minutes of crazed cheering, the fans noticed Tabuu making his way to the center of the stadium after dispersing his clones. Once he got there, the Subspace deity summoned a large, golden trophy that was shaped like a N64 to his hand. As the Hylians watched in awe, Tabuu presented the trophy to the team. Vaati (who was back in his sorcerer form) and Marin took the trophy together and triumphantly raised it up into the air. Needless to say, a few more R.O.B.s were destroyed from the ensuing applause.
"And so the Hylians have won their first ever trophy at the Nintendo Baseball Classic!" Master Hand commentated once things quieted down somewhat. "What a match! This is definitely a game that will be forever remembered in history!"
"Right you are, Righty! We definitely saw history in the making!" Crazy Hand replied. "Well, that's it for this year! We hope to see you all at the next Nintendo Baseball Classic as well! I'm Crazy Hand..."
"And I'm Master Hand..."
"And we wish you all a safe trip home! Good night!"
xxx
Malon and Yuna both waited impatiently on the outfield while Nayru was busy trying to get an autograph from Vaati. The sorcerer in question was currently surrounded by a pack of fangirls that looked ready to maul him.
"Ugh. Why can't she hurry up already?" Yuna shouted out in frustration. "We've been standing here for hours!"
"Even I'm getting bored right now," Malon simply commented in response to Yuna's rant.
However, the pair's boredom was soon interrupted as they noticed Majora flying away in terror as the Happy Mask Salesman ran after him with the Bunny Hood on.
"I'm never going back to that filthy backpack of yours!" Majora was heard yelling as he tried to lose his pursuer.
After a few more minutes of this comical chase, the HMS finally managed to corner Majora at the field's foul zone. Malon and Yuna watched in amazement as the Happy Mask Salesman suddenly blasted the giant mask with what looked like purple lightning. As soon as the lightning made contact, Majora began to shrink down in size while his tentacles began to disappear as well. In a matter of seconds, Majora was transformed into his original mask state. Moving quickly, the Happy Mask Salesman scooped up the now-motionless mask and threw it into his giant backpack.
Before either Yuna or Malon could comment on this strange event, Nayru returned with Vaati's autograph in hand.
"This is going straight onto my bedroom wall!" Nayru squealed out as she hugged the piece of paper. When she noticed Malon and Yuna staring at her like she was crazy, she immediately warped the autograph away and took on a sheepish look.
"So... who's up for dinner?" Nayru quickly asked in an effort to change topics.
"Moo! Pass. I'm not that hungry right now."
"What about you Malon? I'm in an awesome mood right now so I'll buy," the goddess added.
"Sounds great! But what about Yuna?"
"I can teleport her to Kokiri Forest," Nayru answered simply. "She can wait for you there."
"But what if she wanders around and gets lost?"
"What am I, your puppy?" Yuna asked indignantly.
Nayru ignored Yuna as she explained her solution to Malon question. "That won't be a problem. I'll just warp you to wherever the cow is once we're done with dinner."
"I guess that'll work. You okay with this arrangement, Yuna?" Malon asked.
"Moo! Just make it quick or I might start 'wandering' as you put it."
"Sure thing. Let's get going Aunt Nayru!"
xxx
Malon's expectations of a nice, homely dinner were instantly shattered the moment she was teleported into the restaurant that Nayru had chosen. Simply put, the place looked like something between a diner and a bar. Numerous tables were placed haphazardly around the place without any organization. A few dead potted plants littered the area as if somebody had tried and failed to decorate the place. To add to this already unfriendly image, a bunch of burly-looking men in army uniforms were currently partying in a drunken craze.
"Let's try and get a table, shall we?" Nayru cheerfully said as she dragged Malon over to a table in the corner.
Not long after they were seated, a gum-cracking waitress appeared to take their order.
"What do you want?" the irritated looking woman demanded.
"Give us five orders of barbeque ribs along with a bottle of brandy for me," Nayru simply stated.
The waitress quickly jotted down the order on her notepad and walked away. At that moment, a few of the soldiers got up on a table and began singing like a bunch of drunken sailors.
"This place seems to be rather popular," Malon commented as she surveyed the chaos surrounding her.
"Well, this place is famous for its ribs," Nayru told her niece. "Still, even I'm surprised at how crowded this place is today."
Before Nayru could say anything else, a loud voice suddenly shouted out from the other side of the room.
"Attention everyone! I have a very important announcement to make!"
All of the soldiers immediately fell silent as they turned to look at the mystery speaker. Malon turned to look as well but one of the potted plants blocked her view. Even so, she could still see that the speaker was a young man who was currently standing on top of one of the tables. From the looks of the large beer mug in his hand and the way he was swaying, it was apparent that the guy was just as drunk as half the people in the room.
"Ahem! In honor of our great victory, I'm going to buy everyone's dinner tonight! That's right! Eat and drink as much as you want! Everything's on me!"
This news was instantly met with loud cheers as the speaker lost his balance and fell over backwards off the table. However, just before he disappeared into the crowd of drunken soldiers, Malon noticed that the young man had spiky blond hair and was wearing a black cape-like cloak.
"Woohoo! Talk about a lucky day for me!" Nayru shouted out as she began cheering as well.
"Hmm... I wonder what he meant by great victory," Malon mused, unaffected by the commotion around her.
"He was probably talking about the baseball game," the goddess replied. "Either way, who cares? We're pretty much getting an all-you-can-eat offer for free!"
"I don't know. Something just doesn't feel right to me."
"You need to learn to relax more. Anyways, here's our order of ribs! Let's eat!"
xxx
Lost Woods...
After finishing their meal, Nayru teleported her niece to Yuna's location just like she said she would.
"Thanks for taking us to the baseball game, Aunt Nayru! It was the best birthday gift ever!" Malon called out.
"No problem, kiddo," Nayru said as she began charging up her warp spell again. "Oh, and by the way. If you see your mom around, tell her to get her ass back up to the Divine Realm. She's been out for almost three days now and the paperwork's starting to stack up again."
"Your telling that to the wrong person," Malon replied, her cheerful look slowly changing into a forlorn frown. "I haven't seen mom since she left twelve years ago."
"Oh... Hey, don't let it get to you. Din may be a temperamental idiot but she cares about you as much as I'd like to kill Farore. And that's saying something. Anyways, she'll probably go over to visit you once this whole Hero of Time business is over."
"I hope your right about that."
"Of course I'm right!" Nayru replied brightly. "You'll never find a more knowledgeable goddess than me after all! Well, I gotta go now. Take care of yourself, alright?"
As Malon nodded in response, Nayru disappeared in her usual flash of blue.
"Moo! Is it finally over? Can we please get moving now?"
"Sure," Malon replied in a glum voice as she began making her way through the forest. Yuna quickly followed behind as they made their way further and further into the dark forest. After walking on in silence for a while, Yuna decided to question Malon's uncharacteristic gloominess.
"Hey! What's with that brooding attitude of yours? Are you still depressed about not seeing your mother?" Yuna asked.
Malon gave a large sigh before answering. "I know I shouldn't be thinking like this but I'm just worried that mom's purposely avoiding me. I mean, she is a goddess and has a lot of responsibilities, but she could at least spare a few minutes to come over and say hi every once in a while."
"Maybe she's busier than she's letting on. Maybe she's got other matters that she has to attend to."
"Like what?"
"I don't know. Maybe she's a caped crusader who goes out at night to beat up criminals or something," Yuna replied nonchalantly
Malon couldn't help but laugh at that remark. Even Yuna gave a small smile at the absurdity of what she had just said.
After her fit of laughter ceased, Malon turned to her friend with a smile back on her face."Thanks, Yuna. I needed that."
"No problem."
"I suppose there's no point in worrying about these types of things. All I can do for now is... Ooh! What's that?"
Malon suddenly veered off to the side as Yuna followed along in confusion. After chasing after the farm girl for a bit, Yuna finally saw the thing that had gotten Malon's attention.
"It's... a tree," Yuna said unenthusiastically.
"Wrong! It's a tree with a giant hole in it!"
"And why would that be important?"
"Haven't you ever played video games before? A giant hole like this one means that its an entrance to a new area!"
"So...?"
"This is probably the entrance to Kokiri Forest!"
"Oh. Well then, let's get going."
Malon and Yuna quickly made their way through the tree, only to find themselves in a large open area with a bunch of oversized tree stumps around them.
"Moo! This is Kokiri Forest?"
"Of course not, silly! These stumps lead to that giant tree on that cliff over there! And look! That tree has a hole in it as well! That must be the real entrance!"
"There's no way I can get up there. Ugh. Looks like you'll have to carry me again."
Malon quickly obliged and picked up Yuna with her right hand. A few jumps later, the two of them were directly in front of the tree mentioned before. After letting Yuna down, the two heroes bravely walked into the cave-like hole.
"Wow. This is one big tree," Yuna commented after walking along for a few seconds.
"Not to mention dark. I can't even see my own hands when I put them in front of my face."
"Yeah, it is pretty dark in here. I wonder if..."
At that moment, the ground beneath Malon and Yuna disappeared. Due to the darkness, the two of them had failed to notice the giant pit that was in front of them. As a result, the two heroes found themselves falling straight to their next great misadventure...
in Termina!
"Moo! That must have been the worst use of a LittleKuriboh joke in the history of the world!"
Shut up Yuna.