When I got to work this morning, Steve said he had some 'great news.' He didn't tell me right away though, that wouldn't have been dramatic enough for him. He always makes everything into a huge deal.

He waited four hours to come back to my cubicle with a huge smile on his face and told me I'm being moved up to the editing room full-time. I'll be assisting the audio engineers and will be getting a salary raise.

It's still not what I want to do. I want to produce. I want to have the big corner office and call the shots, but the editing room is far better than answering phones and taking notes during meetings. Plus, if Brittany decides to stay with me for a while, that raise will come in handy.

When I began packing my things to take them up to the second floor, Steve cleared his throat to call my attention. I looked up at him and he gave me an apologetic smile as he handed me a stack of documents and asked me to check them for any incorrect grammar. He promised me that that was the last thing he would ask me to do and congratulated me again before walking back to his office.

I've been reading the same paragraph for the last twenty minutes. I'm reading the words out loud but can't process what I'm saying. It's as if I'm reading in another language. All I'm thinking about is Brittany and if she's okay. It's already 11:00 am so I'm thinking about calling her but yesterday she slept until two in the afternoon so I don't know if she'll be awake. I settle for a text message asking her how she's feeling.

I don't get a reply so I try to finish reading the documents.

"Morning."

I look up and find Natalie holding two yogurt parfaits.

"I brought you a snack." She hands me a yogurt and sticks a plastic spoon in it.

"Stop being so nice. I totally bailed on you yesterday."

She shrugs. "It's alright. You were being a good friend...How is she?"

"She's okay, I think. She wasn't feeling good so she stayed at my place."

Natalie nods and eats a spoonful of yogurt.

"You're not mad, are you? Nothing happened. She just slept over."

"No, I'm not mad. 'Course not."

As if the confusion with the whole Brittany thing wasn't enough, I also don't know where I stand with Natalie. I wouldn't say she's my girlfriend. We've had a few make out sessions and second base action, yet we've never really talked about what we have. I hate to have this type of conversations but I need to know what she wants from me and if I can give it to her. She's a sweetheart and I would hate to end up hurting her.

"Hey, um...where do you see this going?"

"'This,' as in us?" she asks.

"Yeah."

"Well, I really like you, Santana. Like, a lot. But you told me yourself that you're still hung up on Brittany so..." She pauses and stirs the spoon inside her yogurt. "Look, I want to keep seeing you. And I want to be with you. I'd like to call you my girlfriend, but I don't see that happening until I know that you're done thinking about Brittany."

That's a fair deal. "Yeah. I understand."

"So, we can keep hanging out and all but, I guess it's nothing more than that right now."

I nod in agreement. "I think I should tell you that Brittany is going through something and I want to help her get through it. But I want to know if it will change things between us."

She seems to think about it. "As long as you separate your feelings."

"What do you mean?"

"I get that she's your best friend and she will always be part of your life somehow, but if you want to help her get through whatever she's going through, you need to do it as a friend who loves her and not as someone who is in love with her. I know it's a lot to ask, but you need to get into that mind set. I'm not telling you this for my own benefit, well yeah I am." She chuckles. "But it's the best thing you can do if you want to help her."

I smile. "Thank you for being so understanding. I promise as soon as she's better you'll have me all to yourself."

"I hope it doesn't take long then." She tosses her empty yogurt cup into the trash bin. "Hey! I almost forgot. I heard about your promotion. Congratulations!"

"Thanks. I'm so relieved to be set free from my duties as Steve's lap dog."

"You deserve it. You're going to have that corner office before you know it." She leans in and gives me a peck on the lips. "I gotta go. Meet me in the lobby for lunch?"

"Yup, my treat today."

"Can't wait!" she yells out as she walks down the corridor.

As soon as the clock hits four I rush home, but I don't get there until five because the traffic in this city is ridiculous. I run up the stairs in my heels and almost break my god damn ankle, but I don't care. I want to see how Brittany is doing. She didn't answer any of my texts or calls the entire day.

When I get to my door, I slide the key in and turn the knob slowly, trying not to make any noise. I close the door behind me and slip off my shoes as I look around for any signs of her. The kitchen is spotless so I don't think she ate anything all day. I tippy toe my way to my room and wince when the wood floor creaks.

My bedroom door is open just how I left it this morning. I peek my head in and instantly lock eyes with Brittany. She's laying on her side, curled up on my bed.

I walk inside and sit next to her. "Did you eat?"

She shakes her head gently.

I purse my lips and move a strand of hair away from her face. "I'm going to make you something."

A few minutes later I come back with a grilled cheese and some warm tomato soup.

"I'm not really hungry." Her voice sounds hoarse. She's been crying again.

"Brit, you have to eat something. C'mon, sit up."

Once I get her to start eating, I notice she's still in the same clothes as last night. "Do you want me to pick up some clothes from your place?"

"No," she answers hurriedly.

"Why not? I don't mind."

"Liam is there."

I'm scared to ask but I just have to. "Brit, did he somehow help cause this?"

"No," she shakes her head. "No, he would never hurt me. He's just upset. I lost our baby. He has the right to be mad."

"What? No, Brittany. I guess it's okay if he's mad at what happened, but he shouldn't be mad at you. None of what happened is your fault. These kinds of things happen. You didn't ask for it or cause it." I still don't know why Brittany had a miscarriage, but I'm sure it wasn't because she wasn't taking care of herself. There's no way she would ever do anything to harm a baby, let alone her own. "He's being an insensitive asshole."

She doesn't say anything and keeps her eyes fixed on her food.

"Did he kick you out?" I continue.

"It's his apartment." She shrugs. "He had been so happy when I told him I was pregnant. It hadn't been planned, but I was excited too because I've always seen myself having kids and I thought maybe the baby would fix things between us."

What she says gets me momentarily off track and makes me wonder if she thought about having kids when we were together. We were really young and never talked about it, but I should have known. Brittany loves kids. Now is not the time to be thinking about the past though, so I snap out of it.

"What was going on between you two?"

She seems hesitant, which disappointments. It makes me think she doesn't trust me as much as she did in high school. She shouldn't have to think twice about telling me things.

"He was gone a lot," she beings. "We were drifting apart and I think he was getting tired of me. Whenever he came home all he'd want to do was watch t.v. I guess it's understandable since he works so much, but I wanted to spend time with him. The only time we were actually together was...during nights." I shift my eyes around the room and hope she doesn't go into further details. "But once that was over, he'd be back to being pissed off. Anything I did would set him off and he'd be in a bad mood most of the time." She stops swirling the spoon in her soup and takes a deep breathe. "Then I started seeing you and he didn't seem to care, but the day of your housewarming party we had a fight because I wanted to go out to dinner before he left and he didn't. I told him I was thankful I had you because I'd be completely alone if I didn't. He didn't say anything then, but when I took him to the airport he told me he wanted me to stop seeing you. He said it was him or you." She looks up at me. "I'm sorry I didn't pick you. I should have picked you."

"It's okay, Britt." Of course it's not okay. Even if she didn't pick me, she shouldn't have picked him either. He's a bastard for making her pick between him and me. I'm not going to tell Brittany that though. I don't want to make her feel worse.

Besides, I'm feeling extremely guilty right now for not taking the time to figure out what was going on with her the night of my party. I was selfish and only thought about how she was going to hurt me. Little did I know, she was the one already hurting.

"I didn't find out I was pregnant until two weeks later." That's why she stopped trying to get me to talk to her. "I told him through the phone and he rushed home that same week. He was completely different then. He was back to being the super sweet and caring guy he was when I met him. Everything was great until two weeks ago. I...I was in the shower and..." Some air gets caught in her throat.

"It's okay, Britt. We don't have to talk about it anymore."

A fresh tear roll down her pale cheek before she says, "No...I want to tell you. I need to tell you."

I brace myself for what she's about to tell me next. I would rather not hear the details but it's not about what I want right now. If she needs to tell me then I'll listen.

"I was in the shower. I had really bad cramps and I thought a warm shower would help but-...There was blood running down my legs. I had been spotting the day before, but my doctor had told me a little blood was normal. What happened in the shower wasn't spotting anymore though. It was like I was on my period. Then little clots started coming out and the cramps were getting a lot worse. I don't think I ever told you, but my mom had a miscarriage once. What was happening to me sounded a lot like her story so I knew." She pauses and wipes away the tears on her face.

"Where was Liam?"

"He had gone to visit his parents that day to tell them the news. I wanted to call him and tell him but it wouldn't have made a difference. It was already happening. I sat in the tub until he came home and found me. He was so confused and scared. He kept asking me why hadn't I called him and then called for an ambulance."

My throat feels tight and I'm trying not to cry, but I fail.

"When we got to the hospital, they gave me some gas and it made me feel better. The cramps were gone. Then, the doctor examined me and told me what I already knew. Liam was so sad. He kept telling the doctor to check again. After checking twice, he sent me to another doctor...the ob- something."

I smile weakly and wait for her to go on. "This other doctor, she scanned me and said she needed to take out what was left. I laid there alone and it was so scary, San."

I swallow. "Laim didn't go in with you?"

"No. He said it was too much for him."

I can't believe he did that. It was too much for him? How did he think Brittany felt?

"Britt, why didn't you call me?"

"I don't know. Everything happened so fast. Plus, I don't think you would have picked up."

She didn't mean anything by that last comment, but it felt like a punch to the stomach. I'm such an idiot.

"Liam, um...He didn't talk to me for days, not until yesterday. He came home from his parents house and said it was best for me to go because there was nothing left between us. He said he'd never be able to look at me the same way because I had lost our baby."

"But you know it's not your fault, right?" Brittany doesn't respond and tucks her chin in. "Brittany." Her eyes look up at me but her head stays down. "It's not your fault. You need to understand that."

She pouts. "Please don't tell anyone. Don't tell Jax or Adam, okay?"

"Of course."

"I don't want anyone to know. Not yet."

"Don't worry. They won't find out. But you're going to need to come up with something to tell Jax. You know how he is."

She nods. "I'll think of something."

"You can stay here as long as you want. You can borrow my clothes while we get yours. I'll send Adam and Jax for them."

"Thanks. I'm really sorry to have surprised you with all of this."

"Don't worry. I'm glad you decided to come to me." I smile and lean in to kiss her forehead.

LAter that day the guys came over. Jax gave me a quick hug and ran to my room to see Brittany while Adam didn't bother greeting her and sat with me in the living room.

"So are you going to stop being so fucking mysterious and tell me what's going on?" He isn't very happy with me right now. I can tell because he's cursing at me and he never does that.

"She isn't feeling well. What am I suppse to do? Kick her out?"

"Yes! Why isn't she with her boyfriend?"

I glance back at my bedroom to make sure Jax and Brittany are still in there. "Adam, keep your voice down okay?"

He falls back onto the couch and crosses his arms over his chest.

"He broke up with her and kicked her out so-"

"She has other friends. Why can't she move in with one of them?"

"I don't know. Maybe she feels more comfortable with me."

"Santana, what she's doing is wrong. She's playing with you. She probably isn't even sick. She's just using that to get in here and creep up on you now that she's single."

"Adam, it's not like that. Believe me." I sigh. "Look, there's something else going on, but I can't tell you."

"Now she's making you keep secrets from me?" He's voice is rising again so I move from the recliner and sit next to him.

"Please don't be like this. I know what I'm doing."

"Whatever."

We sit in silence for a few seconds while I wait for him to cool down.

"What about Natalie? You're just going to ditch her now that Brittany is back?" His voice is much softer now, but he isn't looking at me.

"No. I talked to her about it and she was okay with Brittany staying here for a while."

He scoffs. "What an idiot."

"Hey!" I swat at his arm, but he doesn't react to it. "I need to ask you for a favor."

"Seriously?"

"I need you and Jax to go pick up Brittany's things from Liam's place."

"Are you kidding me?" He jolts off the couch. "Jax! Lets go! We're leaving!"

"Adam, pleeeeease. I can't go for obvious reasons. And I would send Jax alone but he's scared of Liam."

"Jax!" He shouts out again.

"C'mon Adam! Do it for me."

Jax walks out from my room looking down at his wrist. "Why are we leaving? You didn't even say hi to Brittany."

"I know." Adam says. His attention is caught by Jax's wrist. "Where did you get that?"

"Brittany gave it to me." He smiles at him. "It's a friendship bracelet. Cute, right?"

Adam rolls his eyes and grabs him by the arm. "Lets go."

"Bye, Santana!" Jax manages to say before Adam slams the door behind them.

I walk back to my bedroom and freeze when I see Brittany's naked back. "Oh!" I quickly turn around and stand by the door. "Sorry."

I hear her chuckle before saying, "It's okay. I'm done."

When I turn around, she's crawling back onto my bed wearing another one of my shirts and a pair of my running shorts. Once she's settled in, she pats the spot next to her. "C'mere"

I stumble forward and land next to her.

"Careful." She giggles.

I sit back against the headboard and place both hands on my lap. "So. What did you tell Jax?"

"I told him that I'm a little sick so you're going to take care of me."

"Didn't he ask what is wrong with you?"

"Yes. I told him that I would tell him once I felt better."

"Did he suspect?"

"I think he did. But he's too nice to ask."

I nod. "Did he- did he ask about Liam?"

"He did. I told him we broke up, but I made it clear to him that that's not the reason why I'm here. San." I take my eyes off my lap and turn to look at her.

"I know you're having problems with Adam because of me."

"No. It's nothing, Brit. He'll get over it."

"I don't know. Jax always takes my side and it's obvious Adam doesn't like me. I don't want to make them fight too."

"No one is fighting, Brittany. Adam is just being really over protective. He's like my big brother. That's the way he is. It's not that he doesn't like you...well it kind of is. But not because you're a horrible person, it's just because he has this image of you in his head an-"

"He thinks I'm toying with you." She says sadly. "I'm not, San. I swear."

"No, I know. But he doesn't. Once you're ready to talk and he's filled in on everything that happened, he'll change. He'll love you as much as Jax when he really gets to know the real Brittany." I smile at her. "I promise."

She returns the smile and rests her head on my shoulder. "Do you have another blanket?"

"Yeah. Where you cold last night?"

She shakes her head. "No. But I don't want to steal this one from you. You can let me borrow a smaller one so that I could sleep on the couch."

"Oh no way, Britt. You're sleeping here. I'll sleep on the couch."

"San," she whines.

"You're my guest. You need to be comfortable." I slowly lean forward, giving her time to sit up. Then, I crawl off the bed and start digging through my closet for a quilt. "Hey, guess what?"

"Chicken butt."

I give her a playful scowl before saying, "I got a promotion today."

"You did?"

"Yup. I got moved up to the editing room," I say as I pull out my favorite black quilt and grab a pillow from my bed.

"That's really great, San!" She looks like she wants to be happy for me, wel I think she is, but she's too tired to physically show it. "Congratulations."

"Yeah. It's an actual job now. Not just an internship. I got a raise too."

"That's really really awesome. I don't know a lot about recording music and stuff, but I'm sure you deserve it."

"Hell yeah I do." I start to walk towards the door. "I'm going to go make my new cradle in the living room and make us some tea to celebrate."

"Wait." Brittany says. I stop and look back at her. "Can it be hot chocolate?"

I let out a windy chuckle. "Yes," I say then walk out the door.

"With marshmallows, please" She requests.