Chapter 3

Ok, last chapter, folks-this will just be an immediate lead-in to 'Don't Believe A Word'-and not 'Whatever Else Happens', as I previously said. I'm a moron. Thanks, as always, to everyone who reviewed. :) TL is not canon, as I said.

/

'She comes to speak to me;

I freeze immediately,

'Cause what she says sounds so unreal...'

RAW, THE NEXT WEEK

The backstage area was abuzz, everyone running to and fro like headless chickens. And with good reason.

After a lengthy absence, Vince McMahon, owner of WWE, had returned, to give John Laurinaitis what he called a 'performance evaluation'.

And rumour had it that Johnny was peeing his pants at the prospect.

Sharona was quite excited at the thought of Vince's return; she had heard that Big Johnny had seriously fallen out of favour with the WWE Chairman and the company's Board of Directors, because of his many disastrous business decisions since being left in charge.

She'd known and worked for Vince for almost ten years, and while she hadn't always agreed with his decisions, to say the least, she did have a lot of respect for him and she knew he wouldn't mince words with Laurinaitis.

And sure enough, he didn't-the Superstars and Divas gathered around the many monitors backstage later watching, some full of glee, others, who wanted to toe the company line, with set expressions, as Vince berated the Executive VP of Talent Relations and GM of Raw and SmackDown in the middle of the ring.

Sharona scoffed scornfully as Laurinaitis tripped over his own words, obviously flustered, as he attempted to justify his incompetence to an apparently nonplussed Chairman.

And then she gaped in disbelief as Johnny actually tried to say that he was respected in the back, that he was 'a mentor...a friend'.

What the Hell kind of happy pills was this guy on?

She grinned helplessly as Sheamus' music suddenly hit, and she watched as the World Heavyweight Champion strolled to the ring, a big smile on his face.

Sharona couldn't help but notice the way his muscular thighs flexed as he bounded up the ring steps, and she felt herself blushing.

Get your mind out of the gutter, Vincenzi, she snapped at herself. He may be cute, but now is definitely not the time...

/

Sheamus climbed into the ring, grinning nonchalantly at the two men already there. Truthfully, it was immensely satisfying to see Vince take Johnny down a peg or ten, but he just wanted to add his own opinion.

'Mister McMahon!' He exclaimed, clapping the Chairman, who actually looked happy to see him, on the arm. 'Great to see ya, fella! Ya look great! Doesn't he look great?'

As the crowd cheered, Vince nodded in acknowledgement, then turned to Laurinaitis and said, 'This is Sheamus, the World Heavyweight Champion.'

'I know.' Laurinaitis turned to Sheamus with a blatantly phony smile. 'Congratulations on that.'

Sheamus snorted. This eejit couldn't be genuine if he tried.

'That really sounds sincere, fella' He said sarcastically, then added, 'I was listenin' to ye banter and forth, and, as World Heavyweight Champion, I felt it was my duty to come out here and say...Johnny's right. He is a friend.'

Vince looked taken aback, and Laurinaitis looked smug, but that smug look quickly disappeared from his face as Sheamus continued, 'Johnny's the type of friend who'll fine ya half a million dollars just because he can. He's the type of friend who'll hold a grudge against ya for bumpin' into him on yer way down to the ring.'

Slinging an arm around the shoulder of an increasingly unhappy-looking Laurinaitis, he added, 'And he's the type of friend who-how do I put this?-has to be the worst General Manager in WWE history!'

Quickly removing his hand from Johnny's shoulder-God only knew what he could catch from this arsehole-he turned to Vince and said, his voice growing more vehement with every word, 'On behalf of everyone in the back, everyone in the arena, and everyone watching at home, Vince, I implore you...kick Johnny out on his arse!'

It looked like Johnny was about to round on him, when suddenly, Sharona's music hit and Sheamus spun to face the ramp, confused.

What was the lass doing, coming out here?...

/

Sharona couldn't help herself. She knew Johnny had a problem with her because she didn't look like the quintessential 'Diva'. Heck, it was the fans who had taken to calling her the 'Anti-Diva'-it was the fans whose opinions were relevant, not some chump in a cheap suit who had never known the adulation of the people.

So, when the opportunity came up to put Johnny in his place...no way she wasn't taking that.

She threw a quick grin at a puzzled-looking Sheamus, then turned to Vince and Laurinaitis, the latter of whom now looked like he was about to throw up.

Yeah, you have that effect on me too, Johnny, she thought.

'Welcome back, Vince.' She said sincerely, shaking the Chairman's hand. 'It's good to see you.'

Apparently unable to resist, a smile quirking his lips, Vince said to Laurinaitis, 'This is Sharona, WWE Diva and six-time Women's...'

'Whoa, Vince, whoa!' Sharona grinned, holding up a hand. 'Not needing the validation, but thanks.'

Vince nodded, and gestured for her to continue, as Johnny fidgeted, obviously uncomfortable.

She turned back to Sheamus, and told him, 'I've heard it's bad luck to interrupt an Irishman when he's in full flow, so I apologize for that.'

Her head quickly whipped around to face the other two men, but she didn't miss the massive grin that appeared on Sheamus' face.

The man really was all kinds of cute.

'I just felt that I should come out here,' she went on. 'And add my two cents. 'Cause I always do. And I gotta be honest, I think Johnny's doing a stellar job of running RAW and SmackDown!'

Sharona couldn't see Sheamus' reaction, but she felt pretty sure that he was wearing the same shocked expression as Vince. Laurinaitis, for his part, simply looked wary.

As he should.

'I mean, granted, he's running them into the ground,' she added with a grin, as the crowd cheered in response. 'But hey, at least he's running them, right?'

'Sir,' Laurinaitis stepped forward after his long silence. 'With all due respect, this woman has no respect for authority.'

'Wrong, Johnny.' Sharona interjected, serious now. 'I got no respect for you. And neither does anybody else around here.'

Seemingly undeterred, Laurinaitis ploughed on: 'Sir, Sharona has proven in the past to be uncouth, disrespectful, overly outspoken...and well, if I may say, she has had a personal vendetta against me since...'

And that was it. Now she was pissed.

'A personal vendetta?' She repeated angrily, interrupting him. 'Dude, you are the freaking undisputed champion of personal vendettas! Let's recap, shall we? Ever since you got the keys to this castle, you have tried your very best to keep me down, to keep me away from the Women's Championship, because I don't fit your frankly outdated image of what a so-called 'Diva' should look like. Oh, and also because I've experienced a little thing called success. Jealousy is a terrible thing, Johnny.'

'Then there's John Cena, a good friend of mine, who, I guess, doesn't match your 'vision' of a WWE Superstar. Why's that, Johnny? Because he won't wear a suit? Because he won't toe the line? Or maybe because, oh, wait, he's been successful? Anyone sensing a pattern here?'

'And don't get me started on your treatment of CM Punk. I mean, let's face it, he is the exact polar opposite of everything you want in a WWE Champion. Which is a large part of why he's my best friend. And why do you hate Punk so much, Johnny? Because he has tattoos? Because he's Straight-Edge? Because he's not afraid to speak his mind? Or is it because, yep, you guessed it, ladies and germs...he's successful?'

Sheamus watched Sharona read Laurinaitis the Riot Act, eyes wide and, he was sure, mouth just a little agape. Honestly, he was more than a little in awe of this beautiful, fiery, fearless woman. Especially since everything she was saying made perfect sense.

But it seemed that they had all but forgotten he was there, and he took this as his cue to leave.

However, just as he bent to slip through the ropes, Sharona turned and pointed straight at him, and he stopped, eyeing her curiously.

'And then, there's Sheamus.' Sharona was on a roll now. 'What's wrong with him, Johnny? Too pale? Too Irish? I mean, you fined the guy half a million dollars from Brogue Kicking a ref in the face. Don't get me wrong, I like Chad Patton as much as the next person, but there's no way his face is worth that kind of money!'

There was general laughter at this, including from Sheamus, and even Vince looked amused, while Laurinaitis' face got redder and redder with anger.

'Let's face facts, you overpaid, underachieving, clueless moron.' She concluded. 'You fining Sheamus had nothing to do with what he did-and everything to do with what he is! He's the World Heavyweight Champion, he's popular, he's-and here's the key word again, folks-successful. None of which you have ever been. And you can't stand it!'

'Sir,' Johnny addressed Vince, trembling with obvious humiliation and rage. 'Sharona obviously doesn't realize what I have done for this company. She believes I'm just here to be made fun of!'

'I gotta be honest with you, bub.' God, was she enjoying this. 'I can't think of a single other valid reason as to why you are here!'

'I have vision!' Finally, Laurinaitis turned his attention to her, face now the colour of ripe beetroot. 'I have done more for this company than you can imagine! I have a master plan!'

'A master plan?' Sharona injected as much sarcasm into her voice as was humanly possible. 'From where I'm standing, your 'master plan' and the stuff that comes out of your rear end when you go to the bathroom bear an uncanny resemblance to each other!'

Vince snorted, but it was the roar of laughter behind her that got Sharona's attention, and she turned to see Sheamus doubled over, hands planted on his thighs, massive shoulders shaking as he howled with mirth.

And something inside her...softened, at the sight of this big tough Irishman laughing at something she had said.

'That isn't funny, Sharona!' Laurinaitis snapped, and, jerking her thumb at Sheamus, she retorted, grinning, 'There's a giant redhead behind me right now who thinks differently.'

If anything, this made Sheamus laugh even harder, and Laurinaitis, growing ever more flustered, exclaimed, 'I am not going to stand here and take this!'

'Well, I could get you a chair and you could take it sitting down!' She shot back. Now, even Vince was laughing, and another howl behind her back told her that Sheamus was still in throes of laughter.

As much as she was enjoying this, it was time to wrap things up.

Turning to a red-faced and chuckling Sheamus one last time, Sharona said, 'What was it you said, big guy? 'Kick Johnny out on his arse'?' She turned her attention to Vince and finished, 'Yeah-I'm with Sheamus on that one!'

As she dropped the mic and left the ring, Sharona gave Sheamus a friendly smile and pat on the shoulder, but he could only stare after her, rendered speechless. And it wasn't just because his sides were sore from laughing.

He had never in his entire life known a girl who had made him laugh that much.

But it wasn't just that. She had so much passion, so much heart and courage and conviction.

She was quite a lass.

And now, he found, he liked her all the more.

He just wondered if there was any way she could like him back...

And that's it, folks. As I said, for the basic continuation of this story, refer to 'Don't Believe A Word'. And don't forget to R&R! Thanks a million! Ellen.