Well I hope everyone liked last chapter, I posted this one so quick that I haven't given anyone a chance to respond but hey at least there's two updates! I was going to originally do the Wal-Mart after this chapter but this one got too intense so I switched them up a little bit. I hope you all like this chapter, it's longer and has more drama!

As always please review, they seriously make my day! Now on with the chapter!

"Can we at least stop by a liquor store on the way?" I told him pleadingly as we got in the truck. Being with him was bad enough, being with him and reliving our past could be excruciating. On top of that I have to tell him that he has a son I haven't told him about…if he believes me.

"I would prefer it if you were sober, don't want to have to clean up your puke again," he said with a chuckle.

"ONE TIME! I threw up one time and it gets thrown in my face for years!" I exclaimed with a small laugh. "Did people just forget about the dozens of other times where I out drank almost everyone at the parties?"

"That's what made it so funny when you did finally get sick!" he said with a laugh. Unfortunately Dimitri and I were pretty popular at school so that meant we got invited to all of the parties. As long as it wasn't softball season I would usually get drunk. I could out drink pretty much everyone besides Adrian, the professional drunk, and Dimitri, the king of Russian vodka, that crap was gross and the only thing I couldn't handle. One of the last parties we went to I tried my hardest to out drink Dimitri, doing that nasty Russian vodka crap and unfortunately lost. They still throw it up in my face 5 years later.

"Oh whatever, I still kicked ass and took names," I said leaning to the radio. I turned it up a little, I listened for a second.

"I do cherish you, for the rest of my life. You don't have to think twice I will love you still"

Yea no changing that one. I listened to the next station.

"How do I live without you?"

Yep you're gone to.

"He stopped loving her today,"

Seriously! This is bull shit! On to the next!

"Roll down the windows turn it on up. Pour a little crown in my Dixie cup get the party, started."

Eh still a love song but I can deal with this one. I honestly really like this song. Alexz and I sing it all the time in the car. Before I knew it I was softly singing along. I rolled my window down and tried to forget who was by in the car with me and just enjoy the song.

"Thought you don't like country?" Dimitri asked. I didn't have to look at him to tell he was smirking at me.

"Some country is tolerable, especially when it's Luke Bryan," I added just to annoy him. I would never actually admit that I like country but I'm sure he has his suspicions.

"Oh really?" he said. "so as long as it's a hot guy its good country?"

"Never said that comrade, besides you think Luke Bryan is hot?Awkward…." I said with a small smile still not looking at him.

"Hey he's not really my type, kinda has the wrong body parts," Dimitri replied. At that I snorted but not loud enough for him to hear over the music.. By now I had figured out where we were going and knew it'd be a bit before we got there so I pulled my feet up to rest on the dash and got comfy. By then the song was changing. I knew this one also but I doubt Dimitri did. It's a new female singer coming up that was on a show called One Tree Hill named, Jana Kramer. This wasn't one of her more popular songs, must be a new release. I of course started singing along.

"Shoulda just called it like I saw it.
Shoulda just called for help and ran like hell that day.
The burning, the stinging, the high and the heat and the "left-me-wanting-more"
feeling when he kissed me.
I shoulda just called him "Whiskey"

"Is that how you feel?" Dimitri asked softly. He didn't need to exaggerate because I knew what he was referring to. I thought it over for a minute before answering.

"Honestly, I wish I could say yes but I can't. Even though the end was horrible, I wouldn't be where I am today if we had never gotten together. Plus we did have some good times. So honestly no that's not how I feel," I told him being truthful. I wanted to add if it wasn't for our relationship I wouldn't have my baby boy, who is the world to me but, Dimitri doesn't know about that yet. "Don't get me wrong, I'm still pissed and hurt because of you but I can't regret our relationship, only the ending."

"Well I'm glad you don't regret it. I'm honestly sorry that I've hurt you so much though," he said. I wanted to laugh in his face.

"It's a little late for sorry," I told him a little colder than I intended.

"I know Roza, I know," he said softly. I could hear the pain in his voice and part of me wanted to feel sorry for him but I couldn't not after all the pain he caused me. not after all the pain he's caused Alexz without knowing it. I couldn't tell you how many times Alexz has asked about his daddy. Here recently the questions have stopped but I think it's only because last time I started crying and Alexz is trying to protect me. I know it's my fault for never telling Dimitri but when did I have the chance? When he walked out? I didn't even know at the time.

"I called you, you know. After you left…I don't know if you knew that…" I told him remembering the day I had finally decided to tell him about Alexz, only some bitch answered said that Dimitri didn't want to talk to his old hoe and he had moved on.

"When?" he asked shocked.

"A few months after you left, You hadn't enlisted yet."

"Why did it never show up on my phone?" he asked confused.

"Because some bitch answered it, pretty much told me you had moved on and not to call again so, I didn't," I said not looking at him. I could still feel the pain of knowing he had moved on so quickly…that I was that easy to get over.

"You said a few months after I left? Like 2 to 3 months after?" he asked.

"Yep."

"Tasha! I wondered why she had my phone that day but she just told me that a bill collector had called while I was in the shower. I never let her near my phone but that day I had forgotten to take it with me. that must be why she was so happy the rest of the day."

"Of course it was," I muttered.

"It wasn't like that. Tasha was just a friend I had made while I was away, when I realized she wanted something more than friendship I quickly shut her down and she said ok. The day you called she had spilled her drink all over me so I hopped in the shower to get rid of the stickiness. You honestly think I could move on after you? Especially that soon?" he asked.

"Dimitri I honestly didn't know what to think all I knew was I called to talk to you and some whore answered the phone telling me you had. You had already told me that you didn't love me anymore, it wasn't much of a shock that you would be moving on also," I said pretending as if it didn't still hurt to think about. I wish that I could move on like that, I tried dating Adrian for a while but it didn't work out and we never got intimate, hell we only kissed once and that was too much for me.

"Hey we're almost there," I said quickly changing subjects.

"How do you know where we're going?" he asked.

"Really? Dimitri I've lived in this town my entire life and know every spot within 30 minutes of town. Do you really think I wouldn't know where we were going by now?" I asked astounded at how dense he could be sometimes.

"Right that was stupid…should have brought that blindfold."

"Yea cause that would have lasted through the 30 minute drive," I said with a laugh.

"That's true also."

"Have you been here recently?" he asked.

"Not in 5 years," I told him not elaborating why. I didn't really need to. He turned off onto the dirt road that lead to a lot of memories. He stopped and we both hopped out. I looked around and the place hadn't changed a bit. This was our little secret hangout that not very many people knew about surprisingly. Dimitri had found it and took me here for our first date. It was a hidden part of the lake with a huge field perfect for private camping and having picnics. The only other people that I knew for sure knew about it, was a few people that we used to hang out with like Liss, Chris, Adrian, Mia and, Eddie. We showed it to them but they never came out here unless we were with them.

"This place hasn't changed much," I said looking around.

"Not really. A lot of memories here." He replied. I went to the edge and sat down by the water.

"You know why I brought you here?" he asked.

"Could be a lot of reasons. Our first date, many dates after that, where we first had sex, where you proposed, need I go on or will you just tell me?" I said kind of harshly. I wasn't meaning to but, being here with all of these memories brought back the bitterness and anger at what he threw away.

"Yea this place does hold all of those memories, but the main reason I brought you here was because this is where I first realized I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you. We were laying here on the beach one night just sitting here watching the stars and I realized I could lay there for the rest of my life and be the happiest man on earth as long as you were beside me."

"That's sweet and all but it would be a lot sweeter if you didn't change your mind and leave,"

"I might have left but I never changed my mind. I just couldn't stay. Seeing you so unhappy day after day…I didn't know what to do to help…we were both hurting, but neither would admit it to the other, so I figured maybe if I left. You would be able to move on and heal. It was stupid…so unbelievably stupid even I couldn't believe that I had left but I thought that I was doing what was best for you." He said and that made me angry. I stood up and glared at him

"NO! You did what was best for YOU! You left because you couldn't handle it, Hell I couldn't handle it but we were SUPPOSED to work through it together! Not you going across country and me by myself, alone, depressed, and wondering what the hell I did wrong! Wondering why I was so stupid for losing that baby! Thinking that maybe just maybe if I hadn't been such a horrible mother and miscarried I wouldn't have pushed you away. Knowing that you blamed me and, Feeling guilty because it was all my fault!" I yelled finally letting out some of my frustrations, fears, and regrets. By now I had tears streaming down my face but I didn't really care. "So don't tell me that you left FOR me!"

"Oh Roza. It wasn't your fault. I never once blamed you. You had a condition that we didn't know about, that's not your fault. I am so sorry that you honestly believe I blame you for that," he came over and tried to wrap his arms around me to comfort me and for a moment I almost let him but then I realized what I was doing.

"No you don't get to try and comfort me now. You weren't there when I needed your support and comfort and I sure as hell don't need it from you now." I went and sat back at the edge of the water.

"Do you know I haven't been with any other women since I left. Haven't even went out on a date, Ivan keeps teasing me about it but it's not right."

"Who's Ivan?" I asked

"One of my buddies in my troop. He's pretty much my only friend over there. The only one that can deal with my sulkiness as he likes to call it. Come on, let's go to the next place, it's not that far I promise and we can talk more. Or if you'd prefer you can yell and scream at me if you want," he added with a small grin. He reached down and held his hand out to help me up.

Songs used in this chapter:

"I Do (Cherish You)" by Mark Wills

"How Do I Live Without You" by Trisha Yearwood

"He Stopped Loving Her Today" by George Jones

"Drunk On You" by Luke Bryan

"Whiskey" by Jana Kramer