Ana
The ride to the hospital was frightening and stressful, All I can think about is my baby,, My little boy, I live and breathe for that child and I don't know what I would do if anything serious was wrong with him... Oh God please let him be ok.
Christian parked the car and turn's in his seat, I can't move, I can't think, I'm having second thoughts about having him here with me, Obviously the family is going to be here and I don't know how they will cope seeing Christian here at such a family time, Teddy is my family... The Grey's are Teddy's family and Christian is their family but I can't help the twinge of guilt that fills me when I think about the scene that's going to face us once we are in that waiting room, Oh please let them manage to be grown up for Teddy's sake.
"Hey" Christian whispers as he reaches for my hand, I jolt back from his touch, I don't want it and I don't need it, I watch as Christian's face drops and he pulls his hand back, I exit the car and run in to the hospital, I need my baby the only person I want close to me is my baby, My little Teddy
"Grace" I call as I see her, She jogs towards me and I throw my arms around her, I hold this woman for dear life, I need her to tell me that my baby is going to be fine, That he's just got a bug or a nasty cut or something, Teddy is accident prone just like me so I'm preying that all my worring and heartache is something I can laugh about in a couple of weeks time.
"Ana honey why don't we go in to the relatives room" She whispers and I feel a freezing cold vice like grip on my heart, Why? Why would she want to take me to the relatives room unless? No no no I can't think like that Teddy's fine, He's fine right?
We walk to the relatives room and Grace freezes with her hand on the door handle, She seems to be staring at something behind her, I turn to see Christian standing a few feet behind us, Head bowed staring at his shoes like they are the best thing in the world, I want to roll my eyes but I refrain I need to find out about Teddy
"Christian?" Grace's voice is almost a whisper but he hears it, His head shoots up and he gives a simple nod, I guess indicating that he's fine and that he's coming in with us, Whether he does or doesn't I really don't care at this point
The door opens and I'm greeted with a sea of anxious and worried eyes, I see Kate and Elliott consoling each other, Well mainly Kate consoling Elliott, I know Elliott and Teddy have a special bond but jesus anyone would think it was his son, We close the door behind us once Christian's decided to move his ass in to the room and not in the corridor of course, Elliott glances at us and I see tears form in his eyes but they soon grown cold and angry when Christian comes in to view, I know one of them will make some angry comment so I keep my mouth shut and wait for it to be over
"Ana?... What the hell is he doing here?" Ahhh Thankyou Kate Grey
"Kate please, Grace tell me what's wrong with my baby" I beg, I am stubborn and hard-headed but when it comes to Teddy I will beg for everything I am worth
"Ana, I need to ask you some questions ok, So I need you to calm down and answer them as best you can ok" Grace says as she lowers me in to the uncomfortable hospital chairs, I try to do as she asks but all I can feel is panic raise through me, I nod as I wipe the falling tears from my cheeks
"How was Teddy when he woke up this morning?" Mom asks gently asks as I frown, Why does she want to know this? What does that have to do with Teddy being admitted to the hospital?
"He...Um... He slept in this morning, He was very tired he said that he had nightmares last night" I try my best to think back to how Teddy was this morning, Was anything out of the ordinary? I don't think so I mean he said he was tired but he told me he had a nightmare last night, I don't know if he was telling the truth or whether or not he was lying to me and trying to cover up the fact that he was feeling poorly
"Ok Ana, Did you notice anything different about him this morning, Anything out of the ordinary?" Grace asks as if she's reading my thoughts, I bite my lip as I try to think back to everything that's happened in the last couple of days, I try to remember Teddy's movement's whether or not his appetites been the same... My mind keeps drawing a blank
"He, He didn't want to spend the day with Mia cause he wanted to be with Elliott, He put up a bit of a fight but then just calmed when you asked him if he wanted to bake cookies... Grace what does this have to do with Teddy being ill? Please tell me" I look towards Grace with pleading eyes, Mother to mother she needs to tell me what wrong with him
"Ana, Not long after you left Teddy complained that he was feeling sleepy so I sent him up to take a little nap, A couple of hours later I went to check on him and he wouldn't wake, He had a terrible fever but his hands and feet were freezing" Grace whispers, I think it's just so I should hear but the room is that silent you could hear a pin drop
"Grace please just tell me"
"Ana I think Teddy has Meningitis, He's in the ICU, He's on a high dose of antibiotics at the moment and he's sleeping, I can take you to him when would like" I think my brain's just been driven in to overload and has decided to shut down, I... I don't know what's going on, I can't make out noises or voices around me I feel numb, My little boy may have Meningitis, How did I not see this? How did I not see that he was unwell? If I had known I would never have left him... I'm a despicable mother
"Ana?... Can I come with you when you see Teddy?" At the mention of my son's name I come back in to the room, What did he want? To come to see Teddy with me? No no I can't deal with him that close to me or Teddy, I just can't I need someone who Teddy knows, Someone that Teddy would love to see when he wakes up, I can't talk to him right now, I can't look at him but I know he's looking at me so I shake my head no, I hear a sharp in take of breathe and I can already picture his light grey orbs turning stormy at the notion of him being denied access to something that he now apparently wants
"What? Why?" His voice is no longer gentle and soothing it's now hard and cold, I will not be intimidated by Christian Fucking Grey
"Cause Elliott's coming with me" I whisper as I take a change to glance at Elliott, I can see the pure and untainted love for Teddy in his eyes
"Why is he allowed to see Teddy and I'm not? I'm his father" Christian is now doing his best to turn this round on himself, Why in every single situation does it all have to be about him?
"Like you even care" Elliott mumbles, Oh please Elliott not now, Please keep your mouth shut
"Of course I care Elliott, He's my son" I see Christian's fists clench together that I am positive if you were to open them up he would have crescent moon imprints on his palms
"Really? Then where were you when Ana was in labour? When Teddy first learnt to roll over? Crawl? Walk? Speak? First birthday? Christmas? First day of school?" Elliott sneers as he leaps up, I understand he's defending Teddy but really does it have to be here and now?
"I was always there Elliott, I always cared" Christian yells as he stands almost knocking the chair over
"Bullshit! You only cared about yourself, You and your precious empire, As long as that was ok it was fuck everything else" They walk towards each other, They are nose to nose, Shit! This is going to turn in to a full-blown fight in a minuet if something doesn't get sorted
"My companies mean nothing, The money means nothing compared to Ana and Teddy, Teddy is my son, If anyone doesn't have the right to be here it's you, Teddy is my flesh. My blood, You aren't even blood related to him" Christian sneer as we all gasp, I feel anger pulsate in side my veins like poison, How dare he, How fucking dare he
Elliott loses his cool as he pushes him up against the wall "You were nowhere to be seen, I've been more of a father to that little boy than you have Christian so no you don't have any right to be here and you know it!"
"ENOUGH!" I scream, I've had it, They are both right and wrong at the same time, Kate grabs hold of Elliott and brings him to heel as Grace does the same with Christian, I stand in between them
"I shouldn't have t be dealing with this right now, My little boy is lying in a hospital bed fighting for his life and all you to can do is argue, Elliott, I understand your mad that Christian hasn't been there for him but this isn't your battle ok it's mine and Christian's, I need you to be there for Teddy, Love him and cherish him and be the brilliant uncle that you have always been , Teddy needs his uncle Elliott... Can you do that for me please?" I ask as Kate lets him go and I stare in to his big wide guilty eyes, He knows what I'm saying is true, Elliott gives me a sad look and then he nods his head indicating that he can be there for Teddy and I know he will, Now what to do with Christian?
"Christian... I'm not going to sugar coat this, You are a grown man and you neglected your responsibilities regarding your child, Our child, Teddy is a wonderful beautiful kind little boy, He can be so much like you when you just let yourself, I want Elliott in the room with me because Elliott has been more of a father to Teddy than you have, Nothing can change that Christian, No matter how many times you say your sorry or how many times you say that abandoning me and Teddy was the worst mistake you ever made cause the truth is, You simply weren't there when we needed you, You can not and will not use the 'He is my son' card and get what you want, That was removed from you when you walked out of my apartment all those years ago.
Not everything is about you Christian, Teddy is unwell he's in the hospital and all you can think of is about being denied access to your son, Sorry it ain't going to happen, I say when and or if you can see Teddy and you will either like it or you can leave... End of, No leway, No wriggle room, You either sit your ass and down and prepare for news as and when it comes or you hike your ass out of this hospital and you stay away... Got it?" I finish glaring, I thought I had calmed down talking to Elliott but as soon as I turn to Christian the anger blew up again and I let out some of it on him, Do I feel guilty? No He needed to hear it what's the point in making him think that everything is going to be rainbows and sunshine when it defiantly isn't...
Christian doesn't say anything he doesn't look at me he just nods and re takes his seat, I let out a breathe and decide I want to see my son now that I've sorted the children's argument out, I grab Elliott's hand and see Christian glance up at our conjoined gesture, I roll my eyes and glare at him, I really don't need him going all jealous on me right now, I love Elliott he's been so much a part of my life for years and I would do anything for him, Anything at all but there is nothing romantically going on between me and Elliott hell he's my son's uncle and my best friends husband, I may not have much of a life but I'm not that desperate for a 'father' for Teddy.
Elliott and I leave the relatives room and I let out a breathe, Being in the same room as Christian has always been daunting but now more than ever it feels like the air space becomes denser when ever he is around, I always told myself that I would never let him intimidate me again but he still does it even when he doesn't mean too, Uggg this is so fucked it, I knew I should never have asked him to join me but I felt I owed it to Teddy for him to no who his father is, Now I'm not so sure... I just don't know what to think anymore
We stand out side the ICU for what feel's like hours, Elliott wait's patiently for me to compose myself, I try my best I hold my tears and steady my breathing but the second that door opens it's all for nothing, I fall to the floor and sob like a baby, I feel like the world is crashing around me, It gets hard to breath and the room spins, I can hear Elliott calling my name, I can feel him hoist me up but I can't focus on anything, My head becomes fuzzy and then the dark swamps me, I can hear Elliott's voice fade just like everything else in the room and suddenly im alone, In the dark and in the quiet... My thoughts revolve around one person, The one person who means the most to me in the whole entire world, My little blip, My little boy... My Teddy bear.
A massive hello to all my lovely readers and reviewers, I am so sorry for not updating in a little while I've suffered a case of writers block but thanks to my lovely lovely friend, reviewer and reader .7, Who has helped me with this chapter with some of her amazing idea's I have had enough to set my mind back on track to start writing this story again, She is amazing and I am proud to say she is my friend :)
Thankyou Sue... Love ya sweetie :)
Thankyou all so much please read and review and leave me some lovely comments, I will not leave this story abandoned again :)
Speakfromtheheart x