Chapter 4: A Different Kind Of Courage

Disclaimer: I do not own Yugioh, nor do I claim rights to any of the affiliated characters or brand names used in the making of this fan fiction . All content previously copyrighted is regarded as such.

Warnings/Notes: DefinatelyOOC because Yugi is overly-emotional in my opinion, now, given the circumstances, I think he reacts as he normally would for the most part but its certainly not how we see him in the series. Other than that eventual Crownshipping and Puzzleshipping. OH! PLEASE NOTE that I have always seen Pegasus as a father figure to the gang after the Duelist Kingdom arch and so he is very much reflected that way in this story. ONCE AGAIN: FLUFF WARNING!

Tea smiled and stretched a bit, "Well now that we've gotten all of that out of the way, lets all catch up like most normal friends." She suggested as the others moved away to give her back some space.

"Hang on someone's calling me." Joey said as he fished around in his pocket for his vibrating cell phone. "Hello." He answered as he followed Pegasus and the others into a sitting room, "Hey Sis! How are ya?" He asked. "We were just talkin' about you. You did! YOU DID! Seriously! That's great Ren I'm so proud a ya! Yeah I'll tell all the guys, good luck and remember to have fun, love you too, bye." All eyed him suspiciously.

"Don't tell me little Serenity's won the lottery." Pegasus said with a chuckle as he sunk down into an armchair to relax.

Joey smirked, "Nope but she won her first dueling contest in school! And she's in one tomorrow! I'm tellin' ya she takes right after me! I'm so happy for her!" He exclaimed excitedly as he punched the air.

"DUDE THAT WAS SERENITY!" Tristan shouted in shock and outrage, "I wanna talk to her, call her back man!"

"No way!"

"C'mon I've got a right to congratulate her too!"

"Like hell you do ya damn flirt!" Joey challenged as he stuck his tongue out at the brunet who in turn pouted and sat beside Yugi and Tea.

"Anyway." Yugi interrupted with a smile and a laugh, "What have you been up to since we last saw you Pegasus?" He asked.

"Well." The man thought for a moment, "Nothing out of the ordinary, a little more research on Egypt and its history but with no major discoveries." He continued, "I was thinking of going on another excavation but didn't get around to it."

"Why not?" Joey asked as he slumped back against the couch lazily.

Pegasus shrugged, "I had a lot of things to take care of here so it just fell through, but there's plenty of time for that, things happen for a reason and I figure there's no need to rush them."

Yugi had opened one of the books he'd taken off the table that Pegasus had previously asked him to read, and was intently scanning the chapter headings to see where to start. Normally he never started from the beginning of an art book, jumping around was what helped him absorb each concept the easiest.

"I saw Mai the other day." Pegasus pointed out, "When I was in New York for business." He continued.

"NEW YORK!" Joey exclaimed, "What was she doing in New York?"

Pegasus shrugged looking slightly worried, "I'm not sure, I thought you might know." He replied, "Hopefully she's alright after all that's happened to her recently." While he hadn't meant to upset the boy Joey had clenched his hand into an angry fist and was swallowing hard to force away self-aimed anger.

"Don't worry about her." Tea interrupted, "She's a strong girl that just fell into the wrong hands, it can happen to anyone when they're vulnerable." The truth and perception to the statement coming from any teenager amazed Pegasus and he nodded in agreement.

"When interpreting or creating something that is to reflect you or someone close to you it is best to start with symbolism. What does the subject mean in the given circumstance and what will you use to convey this to others? Is your subject a person, object, or idea? When working on a portrait it is best to try many different outlets of expression; therefore you must allow yourself to construct several different variations of one whole image. When painting a person use their eyes to convey innocence, emotional turmoil, or inner thoughts, softer strokes with more vibrant colors often suggest someone who is reflecting on something nostalgic." Yugi paused in his reading aloud here and glanced to Pegasus.

"So since my next art project is a redo of the previous one of my mom's painting I should start with sketches in different perspectives right?" He asked.

Pegasus smiled and nodded, "Now keep in mind that they mean that in every aspect of the word. A background is also an essential part of setting a mood, when you're painting something that's very emotional for you its best to focus on a general and intense emotion and then a background emotion to create balance." He explained, "Come on out to the table and we'll start tonight, it seems to be fate's will anyway." He forced away thoughts of how much he sounded like Shadi as Yugi went back to his room to grab his sketchbook and drawing pencils.

"C'mon guys, you've gotta see my room!" Tristan urged, realizing that Yugi needed some one-on-one time with Pegasus.

"Yeah, lets go." Tea agreed, "Tell Yugi where we are if you don't mind." She said as she turned to Pegasus, the man nodded.

"Do you think we made him upset?" Joey asked.

Tea paused back the hallway, "How so?" She asked.

The blonde shrugged, "I just thought he might be in a hurry to paint because he's anxious about something." He replied, "Maybe we got him thinking about something he wanted to paint."

Tea shrugged and continued to Tristan's room with the other two, "Or maybe its just something he's really into and is glad to have someone that can relate. Yami's passion is duel monsters, so is yours Joey, you and me both have cooking too, Tea's got dancing and the members of the theatre club all share that same drive. Think about it, all this time we've thought Yugi's passion was Duel Monsters, but what if its been more than that, what if its like you Joey, except with drawing. None of us can relate to that, and people in our school don't exactly wanna sit down with the King of Games and talk about art." Tristan pointed out.

Tea stopped in the doorway to Tristan's room, "You're right Tristan…does that make us bad friends?" She asked.

The brunet shrugged but Joey immediately piped up, "Of course not, Yugi's been confused about art this whole time, he just found interest in it when he found out it related to Duel Monsters remember? He's only getting involved in it to become a game designer we know that. He probably just doesn't know how to talk to us about getting to like it for more than that, just give him some time." He replied as they entered Tristan's room and sat down on the bed.

"Yeah, I guess you're right, he'll talk to all of us when he's sorted out how he feels about it." Tea hesitantly replied, accepting fact for the time being. And for the night, they left it at that.

"Ready Yugi-boy?" Pegasus inquired as the boy stepped into the room now equipped with the necessary supplies.

The spiky-hared teen nodded in response and sat down in a chair to Pegasus's right, "I'm really sorry to impose on you like this." He smiled through a feeling of guilt and flipped open his sketchbook to the nearest blank page. Sometimes in his mind he saw himself acting as though no favor was too big for him, kind of like his mom…sometimes he just wanted to be more like his grandpa.

"It's no trouble at all Yugi-boy." Pegasus assured, "Had it been, I wouldn't have agreed." He assured him, "Now then, I'm just going to start out by asking you a few questions, do you have the book you were reading earlier?" Yugi nodded, "Good, whenever you're ready."

"Now's as good a time as ever." Pegasus smiled at the boy's never-ending enthusiasm.

"When you first think of your mother, what comes to mind?"

Yugi thought for a moment "Loneliness." He replied.

That was thought provoking, "In what way?" He asked intrigued.

Yugi swallowed, what was he supposed to say? Did Pegasus really expect him to tell him that he laid awake at night and thought about her? Should he tell him he wondered if she was as lonely without him as he was without her? Should he say that he felt empty? Betrayed? Alone…? Or should he tell him that he felt abandoned by her…? A deafening silence ensued.

"I guess." His voice was low and cracked, "Mostly I feel like I don't know her, so it's lonely without someone that should be a big part of your life. It makes me feel so empty not to have her around me and I don't even know her that well…so I…I sometimes wonder if she feels lonely too…without…ya know…me." He swallowed and Yami comfortingly stroked his hair through their mind link.

"I see, and have you ever told her any of this?" Yugi shook his head. I can't do it Yami. He spoke to his darker half.

You can Yugi, just believe in yourself, I'm here with you, aibou.

Yugi forced back the lump in throat a little while longer, "No." He replied shaking his head, "I haven't had the heart to bring it up…cause I just don't want her to feel like…I don't want her to say…" Yami…

Aibou…tell me…just talk to me about it.

I don't want her to say I'm a burden. I feel bad cause I don't know…what it's like…to have someone take your freedom away!

Inside Yami knew not what to say to comfort his partner, whom he held closely in their mind, and outside, Pegasus noticed Yugi had begun crying. The boy himself was replaying the words in his head over and over, he could hear a voice breech his thought process but he only blinked in response. Was this person he wanted to talk to? He had to remind himself that this was Pegasus…and that the man wanted to help. Slowly his eyes met the elder man's and he calmed down a bit.

"Yugi-boy." Pegasus rubbed the boy's back in slow soothing circles the best he could, the empathy he felt for the boy after having gone through such heartache when losing Cecelia was almost overbearing. "It's alright now, but I need you to keep talking, tell me everything you need to get out, no one else has to know." He assured him.

"I don't want her to say I'm a burden." Yami forced the words out through his many apologies, but Yugi needed this, he'd needed this for a long time, "I feel like I take away everyone's freedom." Another inner thought…inner secret that Yami forced from his mind through their connection to one another. Yugi grew further upset and took to sobbing louder at the ironic betrayal of mind over will.

Stop Yami…I can't…I'm so scared….

I've got you little one…just be strong, I'm so sorry but please just be strong.

It was hard for Yami to find consoling words for the boy, Pegasus wasn't giving up in his efforts to comfort the child either, and had long since understood what was going on, "Shh, it's alright now, just take a few deep breaths for me, please." He instructed, and through more tears Yugi did so.

"People I'm close to go through so much they shouldn't have to!" It was a desperate realization that was meant for both Pegasus and Yami's ears. "I know they do it because they love me but it feels like that love is taking away their freedom for themselves. If I was my mom I wouldn't want to have anything to do with me either! If I were my mom I wouldn't love me either!"

Yugi! Yami's voice was riddled with shock and sadness. That's not true! Your mother loves you; we all love you because you're our friend and have given us the world! We love you for who you are and don't feel like you take anything from us! People ban together with those they care about because they don't want to lose them for anything; there are many different ways to love someone and your mother… He did his best to hold and calm the boy through their mind link, your mother….

Luckily he didn't have to find the words to say, "Yugi-boy." Pegasus's tones were empathetic more than anything; "Love doesn't work that way." He ran a hand through the boy's thick hair and continued, "Friends love one another in a complete different way than a mother is supposed to love a child. It's a confusing thing, a hard thing, to one day be on your own and the next to have someone that will be connected to you all of your life. You haven't taken your mother's freedom away, you've made her realize that she's no longer living for just herself whether she sees you or not. You're a part of her, and that doesn't mean you've taken away her freedom it means you've made her a more complete person, a person with someone who'll always be connected to her."

"But." He sobbed as he tried harder now to hide himself away; "I can't even be there for her Pegasus…I don't know how!" He cried as Yami continued to try and comfort him in a team effort with Pegasus.

"That's alright Yugi, it's not your job to comfort her." He told him, "You have to live for you Yugi-boy and make decisions that are right for yourself. You're going to be 17 years old soon, you're growing up and have people that mean the world to you, your mother doesn't expect you to sacrifice what you've built up with them to be there for her emotionally all the time. She has your grandfather for that."

"But she never talks to him about anything. If she would he'd help her but she doesn't want his help…she doesn't wanna stop…"

"Stop what?" Pegasus asked as he continued to stroke the boy's hair, it was best not to let on he knew, "She doesn't wanna stop doing drugs…they make her feel good cause we can't Pegasus…we can't…and that's why…that's why…."

"Shh…" At this Pegasus had had enough and gently forced the boy to look him in eyes, putting a clam hand on either side of his face so that he couldn't look elsewhere, "Your mother just hasn't found a good enough reason to get off them yet. I know its unfair but right now you have to talk to your mother about everything you're feeling for your sake and hers. You have a right to be able to talk to her about what's bothering you and when you do she may realize that she has a reason to live a life not under the influence of drugs. It doesn't seem right that you have to be the strong one, that's wrong on many levels, but your mother needs you Yugi-boy, everybody needs someone to hold onto, whether they admit it or not. Even Kaiba needs Mokuba, and right now, no matter how stubborn she is about it, your mother needs you."

"I don't know what to say to her…even if she does pick up." The boy's head was pounding with a fury as he spoke.

"Anything is a good start, do you want to call your grandfather and talk to him first?"

Yugi shook his head no, "Then he'd try to call and they'd just fight."

"I'm not going to make you do anything right now, what's important is that you got all of this out and I'm very…look at me Yugi-boy." He rubbed his thumb over the boy's cheek to coax his eyes opened, "I'm very proud of you, you'll talk to your mother when you're ready and then you'll understand that you had the wrong impression. I promise you she doesn't feel like you've taken anything from her and neither do your friends."

"I wanna do it now." Before he registered what he was doing he jerked his face from Pegasus's hold and quickly embraced the man, who held the hug for a few moments.

"Are you sure that's best?" He asked. Yugi nodded through a smile and wiped at his tears.

"When I paint her…I wanna do it right." He replied, and Pegasus smiled, never had he felt more like a proud father in all his life, and for this he fought back the urge to laugh.

"Do you mind if I barrow your phone, I'll pay the long distance charge, if she sees my cell phone number she probably won't pick up."

"Don't worry about it." He gestured to a phone on the wall behind them, "It's late though." He added but Yugi shrugged in response.

"It won't matter to her." He sniffed back a few more tears and moved to get up.

"I'll get you an aspirin." Pegasus offered as he rose to his feet to give the boy some privacy.

Once he was sure no one was in earshot Yugi reached for the phone with a trembling hand and dialed. For a moment he stood anticipating the worst, the phone rang one, twice, thrice, his face fell, but an instant later, as Pegasus re-entered the room, a voice came through on the other line.

"Hello?" She sounded irritated.

"Mom…" She could tell he'd been crying, "It's Yugi, can we talk?" She moved to hang up the phone…he sounded so upset…."Mama…" How long had it been since he'd called her that? She moved the phone to her ear and then away again. "I really just wanted to talk to you." He fought back his tears, "It's kind of important so if you don't want to talk its okay but-" His heart sank and the tears came without restraint. Pegasus moved to his side with the pill and glass of water in hand.

"Did she hang up?" He nodded, turned to the man in front of him, the closest thing to his grandpa here in Duelist Kingdom, he nodded. Without holding back, planning to tell his friends everything with nothing more to hide or run from, he sobbed into the only comforting arms he'd ever known outside his family.

Soon he realized what he was doing, let go of Pegasus and took off down the halls to find his friends, where he could be somewhat at ease and explain what had happened.

Yugi calm down, do you need me to take over? Yugi, Aibou, answer me!

The conversation only fueled the boy's legs to move faster and he sped off to the people he could trust most, "Yugi-boy!" He heard a voice and fast approaching footsteps behind him before a door to his right swung open.

"Hey Yug-Yug!" Joey exclaimed as he ran to his best friend and caught him in a one-armed hug, "What's wrong, what happened?" He asked.

"Joey!" He cried, "I know I shouldn't be this upset…but she, she still won't talk to me Joey!"

The blonde hugged him as Tea and Tristan shot up and raced out to meet the pair, "Yugi!" Tea exclaimed, "What's wrong?"

"His mom." Joey provided.

"What did she say Yugi?"

"She still won't talk to me guys! And it's really hard for me to sit back and watch her struggle like this, I'm so frustrated!" He exclaimed now more angry than sad as he wiped the tears from his eyes.

"Yugi listen, lets just focus on something else right now." Tristan spoke up, "The important thing is that you're able to talk about her more openly right?"

Yugi nodded in an uncertain response, "Yugi-boy." It was Pegasus who spoke now. He moved to stand in front of him and began to speak, "Right now what you need is a few days to relax and come to terms with everything going on in your life. Its best if you don't focus on any schoolwork during that time. Just let things come and go and I'll help catch you up later, believe me, your teachers can wait."

"Joey, didn't you say your dad always told you guys shouldn't cry?" The blonde felt something inside him constrict, Yugi had never had a father to guide or belittle him, part of him had almost forgotten.

"It's alright Yug, since you've kept it in all this time."

Well done Joseph. Pegasus thought to himself, Yugi opened his mouth to reply, but before he could, a noise interrupted him. Pegasus turned to head back to the room from which he and Yugi had just come and the others followed on his heels. As he picked it up, their eyes traveled to the phone, "Hello?" Silence for a moment before he put the phone on speaker.

The person on the other line hesitated to answer. "Yes, I'd like to speak with my son…." She didn't use his name, nor her own, but none of the teenagers took the time to notice, their eyes were glued to the phone on the wall, what was happening was nothing short of a miracle.

Yugi moved to the phone on legs, which Yami steadied for him.…

Mom…

It's not a cry you can hear at night-
It's not somebody who's seen the light
It's a cold, and it's a broken...
Hallelujah...
-Leonardo Cohen

Texture: The actual or virtual representation of different surfaces, paint applied in a manner that breaks up the continuous color or tone.

AN:I realize the chapters are pretty intense (which more likely than not means they're also cliché) but I think things work out best that way for this story. If you have any critique reguarding the story please feel free to drop me a review with your concerns. As a sidenote I'd like to say I am not well-versed in visual or digital arts, merely literary and if my references to visual art techniques/principles etc. are off to any extremity please let me know, this will greatly impact the overall appeal of the story. If you have any sort of expertise and would like to offer your knowledge, please do.