The Gazpacho Fandom
One day, Twilight Sparkle was in her house. Spike and Applejack were out doing something together, which allowed her some time to organize her books.
Suddenly, the door was opened and slammed shut. Spike bounced in.
"Spike!" Twilight Sparkle shouted, falling flat on her face. "Don't scare me like that!"
"Sorry, Twi," he said, clearly not very apologetic at all. "But I'm really excited!"
"And why is that?" Twilight asked, disgruntled.
"There's this new chef that moved in! Me and Applejack went out to try his food, and he makes really good gazpacho! It's the best meal I've ever had!"
"Gazpacho?" Twilight asked, confused.
"Yeah! It's a..."
"I know what gazpacho is," Twilight said. "It's just... it doesn't seem like a very pony-ish or dragon-ish thing to eat."
"Don't stereotype us like that!" Spike said angrily. "Just because we're dragons or ponies doesn't mean that we can't eat gazpacho."
Twilight sighed. "You're right, Spike. You guys can eat whatever you want. I was just a bit confused, is all." She smiled. "Well, I'm glad you guys had a good meal."
However, soon their love of gazpacho started getting out of hand. She had tried it. It was decent, but nothing special. It seemed like a lot of ponies were obsessed with it.
One day, Spike came home, wearing a new shirt.
Twilight looked at it. "What does that say... 'gazpachians?'"
"Yeah!" Spike beamed. "Me, Applejack, and the other ponies who like gazpacho have gotten together to form this club... the gazpachians! And we're setting a con up next week for gazpacho ponies all around the world to attend! Pretty neat, right? You want a shirt?" He pulled out a spare.
She shook her head. "Spike, are you sure you aren't taking this... too far? I mean... I know you guys like gazpacho... but an entire con based around it? I mean... gazpacho isn't that big a deal. Lots of ponies have strange tastes, but they don't treat themselves as some special group."
Spike frowned. "Twi, haven't we talked about this before? Ponies and dragons can like whatever they want. Even if its out of the norm, like gazpacho, it's their choice to do so."
Twilight sighed. "But Spike... nevermind."
Spike came home the next day, bruised. Twilight Sparkle rushed next to him. "Spike!" she shouted. "Are you alright?"
"...I got into a fight..." he spat.
"With who?"
"Some pony... who made fun of the gazpachians..."
Twilight recoiled. "What?"
"This jerk... made fun of us..."
"How so?" Twilight asked, concerned.
"He said that... gazpacho wasn't good... and that we were weird for making such a big deal out of it... that jerk!"
Twilight sighed. This was getting out of hand.
Next week, the gazpacho con was held. Ponies from all around came. Some of them even dressed as bowls of gazpacho.
Twilight Sparkle went with Spike. He needed accompaniment.
On the way inside, a stand was selling a book called "Fallout Gazpacho." Twilight picked it up and skimmed it.
"Eeeew!" she said.
"What?" the pony at the stand said.
"The gazpacho girl is... getting raped! And then she's... oh my god!"
The pony snorted. "What, can't handle a little gore? Movies do way worse stuff all the time."
"But... this is gazpacho!" Twilight shouted. "It isn't meant to be doing... this."
The pony sneered. "This stuff is true art. But I should have known prudes like you wouldn't accept it."
Twilight shook her head in disgust and walked away.
They walked into a room where gazpacho was being served. Twilight Sparkle left Spike alone for a bit to go to the bathroom. She opened the door... and two ponies dressed as gazpacho were doing lewd... things to each other! She recoiled and ran out of the room.
Back in the main room, Spike was talking with some fellow gazpachians. She walked up to them and shouted, "We need someone to go in that bathroom! The gazpachians are doing... things in there!"
Spike shrugged. "So?"
Twilight Sparkle recoiled. "What do you mean, 'so'? It's sick!"
Spike shook his head. A crowd had silently gathered. "How are we any different than the other fandoms, Twi? They do sick stuff all the time too. What makes us any different?" He narrowed his eyes. "Unless you think it's weird for dragons or ponies to like gazpacho."
"No, its not that! Its just... its gazpacho! They're... doing each other... dressed as gazpacho! That's... disgusting!"
Spike spat and shook his head. "I should have known you were like the others, Twi. They treat us like we're different... like we're weird for liking gazpacho. Like that separated us from normal people somehow. We've been oppressed like that ever since the gazpachians formed. Laughed at, sneered at for lewd stuff that other fandoms do... what's the difference between us and them?"
"Maybe its because they don't treat themselves like their tastes are some special thing!" There were collected gasps. "Let me tell you something. I tried gazpacho. I thought it was decent. But I can understand how ponies or dragons could like it. This isn't some sort of racial thing. This isn't 'you're a dragon, so you can't like gazpacho.' That's fine, people can like what they want. Heck, I like squid."
"Then what makes you different from us?" Spike shouted. "We both have strange tastes... why do we deserve to be oppressed?"
"You aren't being oppressed!" Twi shouted. "People are making fun of you, yeah. That happens with every fandom. Most of the times, they deserve it. Plenty of people have made fun of me for liking squid. What I don't do is treat myself like its some heinous oppression when people do that. I have a strange taste, but its what I like and I don't let people tell me I'm weird for liking it. What I don't do is call myself a 'squidian', and I don't act like the world is oppressing me when they say my taste is weird!"
Spike glared at her.
"I'm not special for liking squid. It's not oppression when people make fun of me for it. Not everything needs to be some humongous thing for me. But it needs to be for gazpachians, apparently. News flash: the vast majority of people don't give a darn. But a few people do, usually about the sick things you do, and you treat it like a huge deal! Maybe if you didn't act like a bunch of weepy crybabies whenever people made fun of you, they'd do it less! And maybe if you people didn't treat yourselves as special for having a weird taste, people would be less inclined to make fun of the people who, coincidentally, make such a big deal of getting made fun of.
"And I get that the gazpachians who do sick stuff are the minority. But if they are, then why do the normal gazpachians defend their behavior? Instead of decrying them like they should, you say 'well how are we different than the other fandoms, stop persecuting us.' Maybe if you want people to stop treating you like sickos, you should try stopping the sickos that give you a bad name instead of defending them!"
"Twi..." Spike said.
"There's a big difference, Spike, between liking gazpacho and being a gazpachian. The former is totally fine. The latter... is.. stupid!"
"Twi," Spike said.
"WHAT!?" Twilight Sparkle screamed.
Spike pulled out a poster. It was a picture of an anthropomorphised bowl of gazpacho surrounded by a black border. Under the picture, in white text, were the words "U MAD BRO?"
He smirked. "So I win the argument, then."
