Chapter 8: She's awake

Mark watched her open her eyes and wince a little from the pain she was in. Thank God. She was awake. She was really awake. He couldn't help himself. He was ecstatic. He leaned over her and hugged her lightly, so he wouldn't hurt her. She looked confused and made a surprised face as he did so.

"Lexie! Lexie?" Mark exclaimed.

"Ma…Muh…ark?" She tried to talk but the tube down her throat wouldn't allow her. She smiled a bit before her eyes glazed over again.

"Wait! Stay awake! Derek's coming. You're going to be fine," Mark squealed happily, grabbing her shoulders to jolt her back awake. "He's on his way now. "

Derek Shepherd's pager went off as he was studying her labs. He unclipped it from his belt to check the message. It was just an emergency page to…Oh god Lexie's room. He hoped that this was good and not bad news. He sprinted back up the stairs as quickly as his legs would take him. By the time he reached the door he was completely out of breath. He stood in the doorway, worried sick and panting heavily as he breathlessly weased, "What is it?"

Mark turned around. Derek was relieved to see a positive look on his face, even though there tears in his eyes. "She's awake!" Mark informed, letting out a chortle.

Derek entered, not sure just how good this news was or if it was as good as Mark thought. Any number of things could go wrong from here. This was just the beginning, the very beginning of her healing process. Because waking up was the easy part. Now comes the even harder part. Living with the immense pain, working towards recovery, having more and more treatment that seems to be hurting more before it helps. That's the hardest part.

Derek first observed her. He noted that she looked awfully confused, she was gagging from the intubation, and her eyes were moving back and forth rapidly. She tried to move her hands but it looked like it gave her a lot of pain, probably from the shattered elbow and popped shoulder. Derek moved to the left side of the bed, which was on her right side. He caringly put his hand on her wrist. She flinched a little but eased her tensed body as Derek said, "Lexie, it's me Derek. Welcome back. We were afraid we'd never get to see you again. I'm just going to examine alright, don't be alarmed."

Derek gently lifted up her eyelid, one at a time, and shone his flashlight to see how she was functioning. He was extremely alarmed when she made barely a reaction to the bright light, other than squinting a tiny bit, but it seemed very late to be a reaction to the light. Most people immediately blink or move their pupils, but she didn't. That immediately struck him as strange but it could just be that she needed time to adjust. But from the dark colored bags under her eyes Derek was a little bit worried. His face must've said it all because Mark asked, "What…What's wrong?"

Derek was startled and said, "Nothing…Nothing that I know of yet. Let's call Bailey, Hunt and Torres back to complete their assessments. Let's get that tube out of her mouth. It's causing her a lot of discomfort and maybe she'll talk to us once it's out. So we can see how her memory is."

Mark, Derek and the nurse Jan worked swiftly and got the tube out, freeing Lexie from the extremely awkward and unnatural feeling of a tube being shoved down your throat. Her chest heaved and then she feel back on the pillow as it was finally all the way out. She struggled to catch her breath at first but then her respiratory system seemed to take a hold better, and her breath sounds were more regular and less rapid. The monitor had been beeping more frequently which meant her heart rate had been faster than normal.

"She's not tachycardic is she?" Mark asked with concern.

"No I don't think so. Her heart rate is lowering. It was just from the tube being taken out….Let's start by testing her memory." Derek said.

"She said my name when she woke up. I swear. It was kind of hard to make because the tube was keeping her from talking. It was more like a muh then an ark but I think she was trying to say Mark. Lexie…Lexie it's me Mark. I'm right here. Right here next to you. Talk to me. Do you remember? I know you do. You smiled at my voice and you said my name…Well sorta. But it was enough to convince me." Mark interrogated her, still holding her hand like it was a life-preserver.

"Uh, let's start with something a little easier. Do you know where you are Lexie?" Derek asked waiting patiently for a response. Just then Bailey walked in. She was about to ask that one question that probably everyone wanted to know by now, "Is she awake?" but once she saw for herself she just smiled instead.

"Nuh…No," Lexie answered, still glancing all around the room with crazy eyes, "Ha…Hospit..al?" She said the word like it was a question.

"That's right Little Grey, Seattle Grace Mercy West. You work here too, you remember that?" He followed up with another question.

"Mhm," She nodded her head. She winced as Derek drew blood from her arm and acted like she didn't know what was going on…And like she was afraid and skittish. That scared Shepherd.

Bailey could see the obvious tension in the room. She stopped what she was doing and called out to Lexie, "Hey…Lexie, follow my voice okay. Can you see where I am?"

"Bailey," She answered clearly without any stammering, as her eyes moved towards her general vicinity but made no eye contact.

"That's right. It's me Lexie. That's good." Bailey said with joy, as she flipped up the bottom of the blanket to reveal Lexie's bare feet. "Now can you move your toes and fingers for us?"

Everyone waited in anticipation when suddenly Lexie's toeswriggled and she did a little wave with her fingers.

"Alright good, the brain has control over the muscles still. Excellent sign." Bailey said to herself.

Derek whom was still on Lexie's right side wasn't so sure that it was excellent though. "Derek?" Lexie called out, not looking at him but gazing straight forward.

"I'm right here Lex." Derek informed tapping her leg. "I'm going to help you through this. You just tell me whatever it is you need and what you are feeling. I'm going to make you better,"

"Derek…I can't see." She answered straightforwardly.

"Can't see what?" Mark asked in confusion moving closer to Lexie.

"Psh Anything," Lexie spoke with a hint of hysteria as she gave a strange chuckle, but then went back to normal, "I…I'm blind….I can't see a thing. Everything's just dark."

Everyone went silent which made Lexie start to cry, "Its bad isn't it?" She asked through her tears. Mark kissed her hand again and rolled his eyes up to keep the tears back.

"Lexie tell me something, how much of last night do you remember?" He inquired while rapidly working.

She moaned and clenched her fist around Mark's from a sudden pain and then let an exhale escape, "I…Uh…I rem…member …Luh…leaving the hop...spital af…fer the surgery. My…Da…Dad ca…called. He suh…suh sounded weird…over the phone. So I ru…rushed to his hou..se and he jumped at me…I was ssssso startled that I duh..didn't suh…see the buh, buh…bottle coming at my face. Then I must've passed out…When I woke I her…heard my phone…It was Ma…Mark, that…That's basically it," She said slurring her speech and stammering terribly.

"Wha…Why is she talking like that? She...She sounds like she's having trouble breathing. Is something wrong with her? Is it the brain?" Mark asked with worry.

"Bailey where are Hunt and Torres?" Derek asked, avoiding Mark's questions.

"They're on their way, that's all I know,"

"SHEPHERD!" Mark exclaimed, standing from his seat angrily.

Both Bailey and Derek were startled. Lexie was the most startled since she couldn't see what was going on. She jumped a little and gave a gasp as Mark screamed. Derek stared at his troubled friend. He was quiet though; he still didn't respond. Bailey stared at the ground, trying to keep her emotions in check. She was tired of the constant destruction of their surgeons. It seemed like every other day someone was getting hurt or dying. Mark kept his gaze on Derek, his lip trembling and his eyes squinting from the pain he was feeling. "What're you thinking, Derek?" He said softly. "Please I need to know. Is this just temporary? From the trauma right? It's just from the head injury! This happens a lot right? And…Plus she got alcohol in her eyes from the bottle and all. It could just be that right?"

"It's possible," Was all that Derek offered back, not sounding too promising.

"Hunt and Torres are going to reevaluate and then we'll decide our course of treatment….We can't make any promises though Mark…You know that." Bailey cut in.

"Well she is a SURGEON she NEEDS her sight! You can't operate on something that you can't see Dr. Bailey!" Mark hollered.

Lexie started to break down again. She wasn't in any state for all of this yelling and bickering. She needed to stay calm so that her BP didn't skyrocket. She started crying again, this time not just tearing up but actually crying.

"Oh...Oh," Bailey said lurching forward, "Lexie Grey you listen to me. I know you are scared, but you have to stay calm. You are not dying. And right now, we are all here to take care of you. You are our top priority. And I don't usually play favoritism over patients but I am with you because we all care very much about you Sweetheart. We are going to fight as hard as we can and we're going to get you your life back. It may take a while and the recovery may be hectic...But you're going to be fine. I promise you that Lexie Grey. I promise."

Lexie was still sobbing but she nodded her head and gave a hint of a smile. As Bailey comforted Lexie Derek grabbed Mark and pulled him aside whispering to him so that he wouldn't upset Lexie any further, "Listen her sight is the least of our worries right now. There could be any number of things wrong with her right now. She could have a bleeder, a concussion, she runs the risk for infection, her elbow is still shattered which means at least one more surgery if not more….She's in for a long painful recovery and right now, you worrying her like this is the last thing you do. As soon as Hunt and Torres get back here we're rushing her down to get more tests and rule out everythingpossible but I can't promise you that everything will be ruled out is the thing. So you need to prepare yourself is all I'm saying." Derek looked at him with a straight unamused face. "We all need to be prepared,"

Mark stood in utter silence with his mouth open wide for a moment but after he accepted the facts he agreed. He gave an awkward chuckle after and made a foolish remark to the entire ordeal, "Strange coincidence…My current girlfriend being an eye surgeon and my ex-girlfriend whom I still have feelings for goes blind,"

"Don't take this out on yourself okay? You had nothing to do with her getting hurt. That was Thatcher's fault. If anything you played the key role in her surviving. You saved her, and so go…Go tell her all of those things you're feeling. Alright?" Derek coaxed.

"Alright," Mark responded. Derek wrapped him in a bear hug before Mark could turn away.

"I just want you to know that I'm never going to stop fighting. I don't care if she has a 100 or 2% chance of survival. I will do whatever it takes. Don't you worry…I'm gonna save her."

"Thank you," Mark cried into his shoulder.

"But to be sure…Tell her. Tell her everything…Don't hold back anymore. This is your one wake-up call. You might not ever get another chance to make it clear to her that you will always have feelings for her. And even if you can't make them work…At least she'll always know the truth."

End of Chapter 8 (please leave your thoughts! I'd love to hear just what you think and know what you'd like to happen)