Title: But this Time, I Mean It

Author: Concupid

Rating: R

Warnings: language, heavy snogging, drug references, reference het sex

Summary: Dee has had it with Noel, and this time she means it. For real.

Author's note: Thanks so much to Bluestocking79 for her endless patience as a beta! Thanks to everyone who's reading, and extra love if you comment (because I have terrible self-esteem and I hate myself for it...)

Dee hadn't seen Noel in nearly two months. He'd been in Australia, and the Robots in Disguise had been everywhere. They finally both had tour dates in London, and it was supposed to be their big reunion.

Dee was going to end things. Noel was sweet, sexy and delightful, but he was also a spoiled brat. Dee was sick of his neediness and immaturity. He could just keep on screwing slags and being Julian's bitch. Dee was done.

Hours earlier, Dee and Sue had gotten into a screaming match because Sue had suggested Dee wasn't serious about ending things with Noel. She accused Dee of being as much of a drama queen as Noel. Dee had thrown a glass vase, and just as she couldn't resist noting how rock and roll it was to throw a vase against a wall, she couldn't deny Sue had a point. Maybe she did like a bit of drama.

Dee rehearsed all the reasons she needed to move on. She wouldn't tell Noel right away; she'd wait until they were alone. No need to make a scene at the airport.

She saw Julian first, towering over the crowd and looking shaggier than usual. If Julian looked rough, Noel would be a mess. Noel always had to live up to everyone's expectations. He had to rock and roll all night and do whatever the fuck Julian told him every day. When a portly gentleman finally moved out of the way and Dee could see Noel walking next to Julian, she couldn't help but smile. He was looking like a rhinestone cowboy, a mixture of glitter and denim. He looked a little unkempt, the mirror image of Julian. She was pretty sure Julian had fallen asleep on the plane and Noel, child that he was, had arranged himself to sleep facing Julian. It wasn't enough that they spent every minute together; he had to be part of everything his partner did, so the left side of Noel's hair was flat, while Julian's hair was sticking up on the right. Noel was looking like an unmade bed in his carefully personalized outfit, like he'd spent hours embroidering his t-shirt but couldn't be bothered to pull it down where it had ridden up. Noel's shirt was rumpled because Julian's was. He was too much for Dee; she needed to cut him loose because he was dragging her down. He was just too fucking needy, and Dee didn't have the time.

Noel never looked ahead; he was too busy hanging on Julian's every word and visibly fighting the urge to straighten his clothes. When Dee yelled his name, Noel finally looked in her direction. She was always surprised by his eyes. Those kaleidoscopes really were quite beautiful, but that didn't make up for all the hassle of figuring out what was really going on behind them.

Noel's smile was blinding as he ran towards her. He was like a dog, never failing to be astounded that his owner returned home. After being thoroughly snogged and complimented on every item of clothing on her body, Dee felt herself softening. Noel really was sweet and loving, and so eager to please.

And really good-looking.

xxx

"You must have been in some fights—that nose has been broken at least four times," Sue pointed out.

Noel waved his hands in front of his face, laughing so hard he was in tears. Dee was waffling a bit on ending things. It was hard to remember the reasons she'd wanted to leave when they were together, especially when she was drunk and high. His heart was so full of love, and his tight jeans were so full of squeezable arse.

He tried to tell them about his one fight (where he'd pleaded, "Not my face!"), but he couldn't catch his breath. He was determined to keep up with Julian, taking every offered drink, puff or bump. He was off his tits: a lovely mess, with an angelic smile and dilated pupils.

Julian was already laughing at Noel's untold story. Sue had been telling a story about how they'd had to teach some guys a few manners. (It was hard to feel a girl up when your arm was out of its socket.)

"So, Twinkle Toes Fielding can't fight. There's a surprise," Sue smirked. "How about you? Ju?"

While Noel laughed hysterically, Julian claimed the closest he'd got to a fight was running away from muggers.

"I'd had about... eight Guiness? Nine? And I was all weighed down by the curry I'd just eaten," Julian sighed. "I made it about ten feet and just gave up and handed over my wallet."

Noel clung to Julian's arm as he laughed hysterically, rubbing his mascara-tinted tears on the larger man's sweater. This was Dee's weakness: the more ridiculous Noel's behavior, the more she loved him.

Dee didn't need to look at Sue to know she was smirking. She and Sue might end up in another fight that night, but there was no way in hell she was breaking up with Noel this trip. Maybe next time.

xxx

After getting a little alone time in Dee's room, they headed back to the room Noel was sharing with Julian. Dee was wearing Noel's jeans and Noel was wearing her flapper-inspired dress. Sue was long gone, and Dee only recognized three of the six people in the hotel room. Julian was deep in conversation with the lovely Chris Corner and the tall, gangly guy Noel called "the other woman"—Julian's former comedy partner.

Julian laughed uproariously at their appearance. Noel immediately began to strut as though he were on a catwalk. Dee gave a not-entirely-successful wolf whistle and gave Noel's arse a pinch.

Julian grabbed at the bottom of Noel's dress, pretending to sneak a peek. Noel giggled girlishly and slapped his hand, saying, "My girlfriend is right here."

"As though she'd mind," Julian growled, waggling his eyebrows suggestively.

This was how it usually started. It was always a joke. Ha, ha, Dee likes to watch men snog. It was only a matter of time before they were making out, and Dee knew it had nothing to do with her. Dee didn't mind; it was fucking hot to watch Noel and Julian going at it like horny teenagers. She was sworn to secrecy, but she knew every detail of their intimate life. Noel would try to be discreet, but one drink, and he was spilling the beans on every kiss and every touch. It had taken nearly three beers for him to tell her about how he'd "narrowly avoided a bumming." Dee didn't bother playing along; Noel had looked downright wistful as he confessed to that particular interlude. Later that night, she'd fantasized about Noel getting a nice, rough shag from Julian, taking the kind of pounding that would leave him sore for days. When she'd shared her thoughts with Noel, he whimpered like a puppy before coming. He had cheerfully agreed when she called him a slut.

True to form, it took less than ten minutes to go from the initial joke to Noel straddling Julian's lap as they tongued one another. Julian was stroking the back of Noel's bare thighs, his hands occasionally slipping beneath the short dress.

Some people were averting their eyes; others were openly staring. Dee knew there were three ways for the snogging session to end. One: Julian would pull away, laughing and joking, while Noel tried to pretend not to be disappointed. Not once had Noel ever been the one to pull back. Two: they would have full-on sex on the couch—the most unlikely result. Three: Dee would break it up, pretending to be jealous.

"Off my bitch, Barratt!" Dee yelled, grabbing Noel by the hair. Julian's lanky friend was laughing nervously at the floor show.

Noel pretended to fight as Dee dragged him towards one of the beds.

"But he says if I put out, he can get me on telly!" Noel whined before pouncing on top of Dee. He was hard from kissing Julian, but there was sincere gratitude in his eyes, and there was no doubt he meant it when he said, "I love you so fucking much."