Chapter 4- Silent Screams
Elizabeth looked around the table at John's team mates and Beckett; they all looked as exhausted as she felt.
It had been a week since they had come through that shimmering puddle carrying the missing leader...of all things. Carrying the strongest person they all knew back home.
And each of them wished that had been the hardest part over, that now they had him back, things would return to normal like they normally did. But carrying him back without a complaint...that was anything but normal.
While that hadn't been normal, it was understandable. The man was exhausted, malnourished and dehydrated, Beckett had told them as much and they weren't expecting that he would wake that day or maybe even late into the next, his body needed the rest and they were happy to just watch him sleep, elated that they had him back, that he was now safe with people to watch over him. So the team sat for two days in the infirmary, barely sleeping out of concern and needing to believe that he really was back and that it hadn't all been a very elaborate dream.
Pretty much the whole of the city had popped in and out to see how their leader was doing, even the scientist had popped in when they weren't engrossed in work which showed just how much John had done in the three years they had been occupying the city. However, they had expected to see some improvement or some inkling that he would be waking up soon and by the end of the second day their happiness was pushing on the borders of unease.
The third day saw the tides swirling and the skies darkening, where in the previous two the skies had been clear and the tides calm. The third day also saw the feelings of unease crashed into anxiety and the Dr doing more tests to try and understand what was happening in the body of their leader, wondering if he'd missed infection markers or brain damage that could explain what was happening.
The core team were struggling, sleep now eluded them completely and if they had dreamt then it had them waking with a start over possibilities of what could have gone wrong and maybe that this wouldn't be happening if they had just found him sooner, if they had just tried harder to find him. Sure they had been in bad situations before, but this seemed infinitely worse, they was something deep within each of the team telling them that something was wrong and it didn't dissipate even when the doctor returned with all the tests results having been clear of anything that would cause what they were seeing.
Beckett had mumbled to himself and out loud, countless things and numbers that didn't make sense to all of the team but they caught them all the same.
Airway-Patent and maintaining own...Breathing- Bilateral chest movement, equal, no added sounds on inspiration or expiration. Oxygen saturations 100% and within normal range on gases. Circulation- Pulse 75 and regular, Blood Pressure 125/79. Bloods taken, results normal. PH, O2, CO2, lactate, base excess, haemoglobin etc all within normal ranges. This continued for minutes and was repeated many a time when the Dr couldn't think of anything else wondering whether they would tell him anything different if he repeated what he knew already.
Sheppard wasn't completely injury free, there were plenty of bruises and scratches and even burns, some of which looked partially healed some fresh but he was keeping an eye on them and they were healing well and weren't infected which was no small miracle when it came to this galaxy. He just couldn't explain it. Although maybe it was just Sheppard's body that needed the rest maybe...well there was nothing else to explain it. Was there?
The fourth and fifth day drained their hope from the start of the week and left them with feelings of failure and dread, there wasn't anything more to be done medically for their leader, they refused to leave his side even though the room felt empty and the person lying on the bed no longer looked like the person they knew. Because maybe not all their hope had been diminished. He was a fighter, he was strong and he would come through this.
But the sixth day...
The sixth day brought with it indescribable optimism and a renewed hope.
But it was ripped away so fast and it was so short lived that it was just plain cruel. To anyone else the fact that his eyes had opened would have been cause for celebration, but for his team that knew him so well it was tantamount to torture. Each of them had almost wished that they had found a body, a bad as it sounds, but it meant that their friend would no longer be suffering the torment they could see in his eyes or expression.
Everyone around the table shared bits of the sixth day with the rest so they could get the full picture...
Teyla and Ronan had been watching over their fallen leader when they first saw the signs of him waking, McKay had gone off in search of decent food and Beckett had been in his office.
Teyla immediately, a smile upon her face and speaking softly, had taken hold of John's hand and squeezed it gently to let him know someone friendly was there as he wasn't fully aware yet.
But then the monitors had started increasing in pace and her hand almost burned with the speed John's hand disappeared. Both Teyla and Ronan frowned at this but it wasn't outside the realms of being normal for Sheppard when he'd been capture or tortured before, it could last a few days to weeks before he would let anyone touch him without flinching, depending on what he'd been put through. So it wasn't completely unexpected.
And neither was the lost and confused look in his eyes when he was finally able to open them, after being missing for so long and then asleep for a while anyone was bound to be confused about what had happened.
It was when the Dr had rushed over and started asking questions when they noticed that things were starting to spiral downwards and begun to shatter their hope.
Sheppard's first words depending on the situation were usually 'what happened', 'is the team safe', or 'when can I get out of here' and he at least would humour the Dr and answer the questions he asked if he knew that answering them would get him out of the infirmary faster.
But he didn't speak, didn't make a sound and just continued to stare past anyone that came into his line of sight, as if he was lost to something nobody else could see, and maybe, they thought he was.
The only thing that changed had been that the look of being lost and confusion had turned to torment and fear.
But, that was not the worst of it, his expression seemed contorted into what looked like a scream, if the monitors were beeping then you would think that rigor mortis had set in. What was even more concerning was the scream they could see in his eyes, as if he was trying to scream but couldn't. They'd never seen anything like it, not on somebody living and it seemed to last forever his face only relaxing when the muscles had given up. it had only lasted moment but felt a hell of a lot longer for the ones that had seen it. He's eyes afterwards, were still staring.
Staring but sightless, screaming but silent.
More tests were run when nothing changed hours later but again there was nothing.
All the people that needed to know were made aware of the new situation and were told not to let it spread amongst the masses just yet. All they needed to know was that Sheppard was being looked after.
The people that did know, were lost themselves, they didn't know what to do or how to fix this. Beckett was researching anything and everything about psychology as he thought that is where the problems lay and knew that after he was told about how they had found Sheppard, that there was going to be some struggles in the future but he hadn't expected anything of this magnitude, sure he'd heard about it but he wouldn't wish it upon anyone he knew. But then they didn't know what Sheppard had been through on that god forsaken planet for the three months he'd been there. And therein lay the issue, if they didn't know, they couldn't help.
It was now the seventh day and they were sat at a conference table, trying to pool all their knowledge and expertise into how to help Sheppard. None of the people were saying anything about the fact that if this continued then Sheppard would be sent back to earth and that they would have a fight on their hands about being told to get back to work. None of them wanted that, not ever and they would fight if it came down to it.
x-X-x
For a split second, Sheppard had thought he'd heard Teyla's soft voice in the distance but he'd hear it before and it had been an illusion that time so probably was this time as well. He felt the touch of a hand on his for a moment before he pulled it away, if it had been Teyla he might have known for a split second but his mind pulled him away into the depths of the hell swirling around his mind.
Hands...cold...skeletal...slippery...fleshy...
The all encompassing smell of blood and fear wasn't new the Sheppard, neither was the chemical smell of something acidic that he'd seen burn through flesh, fat and muscle until there remained only bones. He'd even gotten used to the sickly smell of freshly dead and decaying bodies. These seemed a constant in his life at the moment.
The sounds that had become constant were enough to drive anyone crazy, the screaming, the sobbing, sounds coming from different directions around him of all the ways these people had to kill, maim and hurt. But half the time he swore that most of the sounds were stuck on repeat in only his mind because when he had dared to look around at each of the rooms he had been in he hadn't seen anyone being tortured or hurt or maimed. The other half of the time the evidence for the sound was right in front of him bleeding to death or melting like waxwork models through the cracks of the cold stone beneath him.
Something was different though, something he couldn't place...well maybe if you opened your eyes then you'd be able to see it his mind taunted.
But hundreds of images that he knew he would never forget had already been burnt into his retinas and into his mind and most of it hadn't been by choice so now that he had that control back then he chose not to look anymore. He was tired, tired of seeing the horrors of where ever in the hell he was. He'd been left for a while now though he didn't know quite how much time had passed, no one had taken him away to be tortured some more or had failed to force information out of him. That was the only thing that he'd had any control over so he wouldn't give in. He knew that whether he spoke or not someone would be killed, it didn't matter to these monsters. It was just fun for these people.
Not that he had any idea of the day or how long he'd been here but he knew that it was stretching into weeks now with his escape attempts all having failed and no sign of rescue, he couldn't remember the day where he'd given up hope of being found but it had happened somewhere along the way and he knew it had involved lots of death even if he couldn't or his warped brain wouldn't remember the details he knew that there was a snowballs chance in hell that any kind of a rescue would succeed.
Eyes tightly shut against seeing anything he moved his hands and felt around to see if he could determine anything without looking...
He froze and pulled his hand away as if it had been burnt.
But the rest of his numb body starting to awaken was beginning to confirm what his hand had just told him...the softness that came with either a quilt or flesh...the slickness that he had come to know as blood, especially in this place...the bony prominences in particular places...
His breath hitched as his heart rate started to sore and before he knew it acidic bile was racing up to escape his malnourished body so he had to turn the side so he wouldn't choke.
His head was spinning as his eyes opened of their own volition, looking at the horror before him and not being able to look away.
TBC
So what are they going to do? Will the team be forced to send Shep home if he doesnt get better? What did Shep see when he opened his eyes? Will his team be able to help him or is he too far gone? Stay tuned for next time !
I know this story has been gone for like...ever but alas i have resurrected it and hopefully should be able to get somewhere with it as i had been struggling with ideas for it.