Aha! My hurdle with the next chapter is finally overcome! (Why you be so difficult!) I will be uploading it tomorrow morning (and will actually have the time to as well since I'm not going anywhere until 4 something in the afternoon (yay me).
Queen of Diamonds
"It's only a matter of time now, old friend."
Basch only shrugged his shoulders in agreement with his King. "It's only been a matter of time for quite a while now ever since the candidates were brought to the capital."
"Oues, my favorite Jack, but it's down to mere minutes now," King Francis said with a careless slip into his native North-Central dialect where the Y's were often pronounced more like a blend of an 'o' and a 'u' (which sounded similar to a 'w'). He also seemed keen to pronounce words ending in '-er' with a 'u' thrown in between so that a word like 'matter' ended up sounding like 'matteur'.
It was a habit that Basch had been forcing him to break that had so far proved largely successful. At least he was completely intelligible now, whereas before, it was rather like he was speaking another language. Basch didn't think it'd be fair to say that he didn't like the dialect, because it wasn't true – in fact, he found it rather *ahem* pretty to listen to – but it wasn't useful if nobody could understand him. That, and he didn't want the King's son, Matthew, to pick up too much of the heavy accent and have the same problem with unintelligibility whilst speaking.
"Just you wait, my Basch, any second now, our precious little flower will waltz straight through those doors and faint straight into my waiting arms at the mere sight of my flawless beauty."
"What makes you think that the Queen is going to be a girl this time? And has anyone ever told you how vain you are?" Basch asked him, more than used to his friend's behavior.
"Because I just know these things, Basch. And of course someone's told me about my vanity! He's the same person that I am always telling to stop being such a stick in the mud!" Francis beamed and threw a wink at him, completely unperturbed by the Jack's sulky-like mannerisms. Again, this was normal for the two of them.
"Geez, the way you act sometimes, it's like you're not even married, much less have a son that's eight. Does your wife know you act this way when she's not around; always flirting with other women… and men?"
"How cruel you are, Basch!" Francis exclaimed and recoiled away from the Jack, but this was more for dramatic effect than for any true negative reaction. "I have never hidden anything about myself from my dear Jeanne, and my heart, my true love, belongs entirely to her. However, there are many men and women in the world yet who have never felt the fiery passion of love, can you imagine! I am the Sun King of the Diamonds whose prosperous land has garnered the reputation as the Kingdom of Eternal Sun, and it is my duty to bring the light of love to as many poor souls as possible!" For Basch, it sounded way too romantic a way to describe what was, in short, Francis's promiscuousness. "Even you have benefitted from my teachings, have you not, Basch? Or has it been too long and you've forgotten those lovely evenings we shared?"
"Ah! NoIhaven't," Basch said quickly as he looked away from Francis and a bright red blush worthy of a Heart suffused his face. He was not about to forget those particular nights any time soon. "Just… don't scare off the poor Queen. You're a very exhausting person to be around even for a nobleman like me who's had to deal with you even before you came into office – before I came into office! – but you've never had to deal with one of your own of the Diamond Tripartite being new before, and especially not a Queen. You know what all those people were like; especially since you helped me to choose the potential Queens as per your royal duties as King, and they've never held a title to anything in their lives. Many of them are just trying to earn a living and make a place for themselves somewhere in the world. A peasant or a bourgeois that is chosen by the citizens to keep their interests at heart will not only have to adjust to court life, but maintain an entirely different frame of mind about how to go about their lives. And somebody like that is going to be completely overwhelmed by you because you're such a formidable force of nature."
"Why Basch! Was that a compliment at the end, there?" Francis asked slyly.
"No, it was a warning. I don't want to end up spending most of my time guarding the Queen from you and having her try and cling to me when I have things to do simply because her first impression of you has been a traumatizing one."
"Aha! Even you want the next Queen to be a woman, you naughty rogue, you," Francis piped up and made an almost brotherly-tsking sound. Like he was one to talk!
"It's not that at all," Basch denied with a scowl, tempted to smack the King in the head with his stick, and it was the truth. "I'm just used to thinking of the Queen as a woman because our last Queen was a woman."
"Ah, our serene lady, Queen Baltia; I fear I shall miss her terribly," Francis sighed with a fond look of reminiscence upon his face.
Basch snorted in amusement, "The second woman to charm you before you got the chance."
"Indeed! Whoever's said before that older women are dull could not have been more wrong! She was as full of sly wit and fiery spirit the likes of which I've only ever seen to such degree in the Lady Lyon Gaul of the House of Massalia, my mother. That wicked poker-player older sister of mine's got that kind of spirit too, I suppose," he added with a slight shudder.
"Still won't play against Mona anymore?" Basch asked rhetorically, taking a sort-of perverse pleasure in seeing the energetic King still unsettled by that one instance, even though it was quite the embarrassing affair, mostly because Jeanne had chosen such a bad time to come over to visit with the youngest Antiquity sister, Francia (and really, it was amazing that Mona's and Francis's little sister wasn't somehow mentally-scarred by that event).
The sounds of many footsteps echoed off the palace floor, coming closer to the large and luxurious reception room where he and the King sat in waiting and they simultaneously dropped their conversation, standing up and looking respectable, not lazy and bored like they had earlier. As expected, the announcer, a man by the name of Renaud (pronounce: Ren-OH) Picardy was the first to enter the open right half of the doorway and he bowed before them as per the traditional rites.
"Your Majesties, presenting the new Queen of Diamonds of the Diamond Tripartite, the Lady Elise Vogel."
Without further flair or presentation, the brunette reached behind the closed left door and gently drew a tiny girl out from hiding. If it had been anyone but Mr. Picardy, then Basch would have believed this was some kind of messed-up joke, but Mr. Picardy wasn't that type of man. This was their legit new Queen, this waif of a girl who looked no more than ten years old, maybe (she easily could have been younger though; she wasn't much taller than Matthew). He realized that he'd said that the Queens had never had a title to their name (the current Queen of Hearts just barely passing that prerequisite with his mother having been disowned and disinherited from the House of Yangtze for choosing to marry a man of no noble stature; his mother had told him it'd been quite the scandal in determining Kiku's legitimacy for Queenship), but this child looked to not even have a penny to call her own! She was the perfect picture of poverty, from the frayed and patchy blue dress and stained apron, to the too-small leather shoes filled with holes, and the dirty blond hair held back into two roughly-done braids that looked like they hadn't been taken out and redone in months at least. Worst of all, he knew he had never seen the girl before and certainly would never have picked her as a potential candidate for Queen. Which could only mean-!
"Elise!" Francis said enthusiastically to the little girl, and it took all of Basch's willpower not to even so much as glare at the king, much less murder him via the most painful way possible. "My dear child, do you remember me?"
Elise gave a shy smile and a quick nod. "Jas, King Francis, I remember you," she admitted quietly and her voice was so high-pitched and melodic like that of a songbird, "You gave me food when you found me and asked me if I wanted to become the Queen of Diamonds because you were looking for someone because the other Queen died."
"That's right, I did," Francis agreed as he knelt down before her, his blue eyes twinkling with that paternal 'big brother' aura that he liked to use so often when talking to people younger than him, including Basch. "You came and you succeeded, just like I knew you would, remember?"
"That's right, you did, your Majesty!" she exclaimed, her blue-green eyes brightening up like what Francis had said was the most exciting thing in the world. "But how did you know that?"
"Big Brother knows many things little songbird," Francis said mysteriously, "But that's Big Brother's secret for other days, my Queen. Because we are equals now, you no longer have to call me 'Your Majesty'. From now on, you may call me Francis or Big Brother. Either is perfectly fine with me."
"Oh, no! I couldn't!" Elise protested, "I couldn't call you something so informal as that, Your Majesty! It wouldn't be right!"
Basch saw that Francis was slightly taken aback by her sudden outburst before he recovered his grandiose form and said, "Very well then little songbird. Please at least call me King Francis if you insist on the formality, my dear. And in return, whenever we discuss matters of the kingdom, I shall call you Queen Elise, but when it is just conversation between us, may I call you Elise, little songbird?"
"Ah, jas. That would be fine, Your Ma- Ah, I mean King Francis," Elise agreed with another shy smile at her use of the King's name, still clearly not comfortable with even that much informality, but willing to do her best for the compromise she'd agreed to. Basch's green eyes narrowed slightly, perplexed. He didn't catch it the first time, but now he realized that she had the same accent as his father and also Roderich the rare times his older half-brother wasn't concerned with appearances (those moments were very few and far between though). That was a Spadian accent, and though the Spade Kingdom was only to the west of them, how did a little girl with a Northwestern Spadian accent like her, one who didn't travel because she couldn't, end up in the Kingdom of Diamonds and long enough to become a citizen even?
"Splendid!" Francis said with delight and glanced back at him with an amused smile (that he would wipe off his stupid face as soon as he got the chance) and gestured towards him. "And that silent, gloomy-looking gnome over there is the third member of the Diamond Tripartite, Jack Basch. I know he looks very scary and intimidating, but don't be frightened, Elise, he's the best soldier the kingdom has and he's very good at his job. Even if you weren't the Queen of Diamonds, he wouldn't even dare think of harming you; it's just not in his character, little songbird."
He saw what Francis was doing there, trying to suck up to him and pacify his anger; well he was onto him and he wouldn't let him get away with it. But at least the new Queen had done nothing wrong for him to be anything less than respectful to her. Basch bowed his head slightly and said rather stiffly, "A pleasure to meet you, my Queen. I hope we'll be able to work well together in the years to come."
"Ah, j-jas, I do too, my Jack," Elise responded with a rough approximation of a curtsey.
"Wonderful manners, little songbird!" Francis praised and beamed at her, clapping one brotherly hand upon her shoulder. "Now that we've all been introduced, it's time for the coronation ceremony so that you can become the official Queen of Diamonds, alright Elise? Now follow Mr. Picardy, he will take you to my wife and my older sister and they will get you all bathed and dressed and tell you what you have to do in the ceremony, alright? There's a good girl."
Mr. Picardy took a gentle hold of the girl's hand – her fingers were so tiny! – and led her out of the reception room to be taken to the royal quarters of the members of the House of Antiquity. And only when she was safely gone did Basch round on Francis. "You!" he spat with such venom in his voice that he might have killed Francis had he been a venomous snake that had bitten him. "What were you thinking?! I knew you were always somewhat depraved, but this is a new low, even for you!"
"And you have such little faith in me to think that I would sink that low?" Francis demanded, all the dramatic pretenses from earlier gone; he was dead serious now. "Have a care, Basch. Even I in all my sexual liberty know what boundaries cannot and should not be crossed. You saw how she was just now, well she was doubly-worse when I first found her; an orphaned Spadian-accented child simply wasting away with not a heart around to care whether she lived or died; do you really think I could have just abandoned her after passing by such a poor creature? No, Basch, I couldn't and neither would you if you had been there. Taking her back here to the capital with me under the pretense of having found another potential Queen for the Kingdom was the only thing I could do to make sure she lived."
"The only thing!" Basch barked harshly, "You're the King of Diamonds and you aren't new into your reign and uncertain about your privileges and powers. You could have brought her back to the capital simply because you wanted to, and since she was a starving orphan, nobody would have stopped you, especially not me when our Kingdom is prospering so well. You'd have been well within your right to bring the girl here and raise her until she was back to a healthy weight and then find a family that'd be willing to adopt her. You didn't have to throw her into the mix of Queen candidates just to get her here!"
"She'd lost hope in everything, Basch, even living; I had to give her a future to set her eyes on."
"Yeah, well starving to death kinda does that to people, but you didn't have to promise her the Queen's crown of all things! She's just a kid, an orphaned peasant's kid even! How old is she even?! Ten?!"
"Twelve actually."
"Whatever! She'd have kissed the ground you walked on if you'd promised her food and a family to care for her; you didn't need to offer her something so grandiose!"
"I could hardly have promised her the Diamond Queen's crown if the people hadn't chosen her," Francis retorted.
"Not for lack of trying," Basch said with an irritated snort and jabbed his walking stick (that he more often than not ended up using as a weapon, like now) into the King's chest. "And don't even try and tell me that you couldn't control the situation. You knew from the very beginning that the people would become bleeding hearts for the poor, starving, orphaned peasant girl in comparison to the other more moderately well-off competitors she was surrounded by, or else you would never have even made that promise to her in the first place. I know how your brain works, and unlike your older sister, you don't make gambles that you don't know if you can win; not unless you know how to tip the situation in your favor."
Francis narrowed his eyes at him and crossed his arms over his chest with a sigh of disappointment. "You know, for a zealous humanitarian that goes out of his way to ride through the entire country in the summer on horseback to make sure that everyone's protected against the Detritus virus that strikes in early fall, I'd have imagined you would be more sympathetic to this poor girl's plight."
"It's not the girl and her pitiful circumstances that I have a problem with," Basch growled, "It's the idiot who put her on the throne as Queen of the entire Diamond Kingdom that I'm angry with! Can you even conceive of what you've done by setting up this child like that?! When I seek out potential Queens from the common population, I look for two things, Francis. Two things! Hard workers; I won't tolerate any slacking in a queen. And experience; if a person has lived an isolated and bigoted life, then they are apt to be stubborn, difficult to deal with, and closed-minded which all result in nothing getting done and the Kingdom suffering for it until the citizens are so riled and malcontent that the Queen must be deposed and another one chosen in their place, but rather in an atmosphere of turmoil, mistrust, and non-cooperative behavior that will only further threaten the division of the Kingdom. People who have experienced many aspects of life and recovered from the more difficult ones at least maintain some level of awareness beyond their own lives and are generally more accepting of others viewpoints and circumstances."
Basch paused for a proper breath of fresh air before he would continue. He'd never told anyone before, not even his mother, the previous Jack of Diamonds, exactly what his criteria would entail when he searched the Kingdom for potential Queens should he need to after he succeeded her as the Jack of Diamonds. Sure The Jack's Book gave some examples of what were considered to be good qualities in a Queen, but Basch only found them useful to a point. A proper, well-educated Jack should know what kind of qualities the best type of Queen should have for the Kingdom. The Queens were generally considered to represent the will of the people in the Tripartites, which probably made the Queen the most important member of the Tripartite, even moreso than the King. The King may have been the representative figurehead of the Kingdom and the absolute highest government authority in some matters, but it was the Queen who represented the people's will and without the people who composed of the nation, there was no Kingdom for the Kings to rule or the Jacks to maintain. Simple logic really.
"I have nothing against Elise," Basch started off, feeling that he had to clarify that for what he was about to say. "But she's a child and though she's apparently been through things that no child should ever have to endure, she has not lived her life yet. She's still in the process of figuring out who she is and what she will become. A child being raised in the royal palace for the second half of life just won't be able to connect with the people working in the fields or the woods or the rivers as well as somebody who had grown-up in and survived the natural hazards of their occupations and their lives in those kinds of environments, and it will become all too plainly-obvious when Elise gets older that she will have more the mentality of an aristocrat than a peasant or even a bourgeois or master craftsman. And growing up here, she will never participate in the invigorating hard work that I find necessary in building a healthy, productive mind. Our Queen is doomed to be deposed and removed from office early, Francis; that's what you've setup for the Kingdom of Diamonds."
To his consternation, Francis outright laughed! Laughed aloud when there was nothing funny at all to be had in this situation! "Oh, my dear Basch!" Francis exclaimed once he'd finally calmed down enough to be able to talk, "I always joke about how you're a stick lodged deep in the mud, but I never knew that you were such a strong pessimist as well!"
"Is there any reason why I shouldn't be?" Basch asked, his tone still bitter even though he wasn't growling anymore.
"You know exactly what you want in a Diamond Queen, oues?"
"Don't you slip into that dialect on me right now," Basch said bitterly.
"Alright then, Mr. Sulky Face; you know exactly what you want in a Diamond Queen, yes?"
"… Yes. And Elise is not that."
"Can you at least let me finish where I'm trying to go with this before you continue to chew me out, my stubborn Jack?" Francis asked in exasperation. He took Basch's silence as a form of consent and continued on, "Elise is still just a child, yes?"
"Exactly."
"Well then, what's the problem?" Francis said with a smile and opened his arms wide like he always did when greeting his wife, mother, sisters, friends, and lovers, "You have a grateful young mind just waiting to be shaped by experience; you couldn't have asked for a better candidate, my friend."
"Huh, what? What are you talking about?" Basch asked suddenly and frowned, not understanding what Francis was implying, knowing that he'd missed something important.
"You have all your criteria for what's desirable in the Queen of our Kingdom and a child Queen not so young that she needs a parent's strict discipline and not so old that she hasn't yet begun to form a concrete idea of how the world works around her. She's a child eager to do her best for those who saved her life, and just because she's the Queen doesn't mean she has to live here all the time. So she can still learn the importance of a good work ethic and the hardships of the average citizen beyond the crippling poverty and famine that she's suffered. With diligence, determination, careful planning, and perhaps some luck, we can raise her into becoming the perfect Queen of Diamonds."
Basch stood staring at Francis in shock, completely dumbstruck. "The perf- is that even possible? Could we really create the perfect Queen?" he asked finally, his natural skepticism showing through.
"Of course not, silly Basch!" Francis said with a slight laugh and clapped a friendly hand on his shoulder, "Nothing is perfect, but we can certainly aim for it, and close-to-perfect is still a huge success if we can manage to obtain it, don't you think?"
"Um… yeah, that is," Basch agreed, still feeling very much overwhelmed.
"That's the spirit! Now for the moment, I bid you adieu," Francis said as he stepped back and gave a bow to the Jack, "I shall be speaking to Mr. Champagne (which he pronounced like 'Misteur' much to Basch's annoyance; he knew when Francis did it just to spite him) about how the preparations for the coronation are coming along and assist where I may. That's where I shall be if you find you have need of me before the ceremony."
When Francis had gone, Basch slumped back down into the chair that he had abandoned when Elise had come in, and he stared blankly at the floor, still dumbfounded over what Francis had just proposed; that they actually train her into being the Queen that they needed. It wouldn't be easy, no, but it would be manageable, and she really was at the right age to be able to attempt that too, just like Francis sa- Basch paused and jerked his eyes over to the open doorway where Francis had just walked through minutes ago. No way! That's wasn't-! No, it was impossible! He'd told nobody of his criteria before today, so he couldn't have-! But was there-? How could he have known or did he just make a good guess? But no, that didn't make any sense; it'd have been far too complex a scheme to pull it off! Francis couldn't possibly have planned for a girl like Elise to become the next Queen of Diamonds... could he?
Oh France, you cunning devil, you. ;)
Oh my God, Liechtenstein is so cute when she's that tiny and with her braids and ADFJGOHWSJLFCUTE! ! ! ! I had a great difficulty getting through this chapter because of her and her cuteness, but lol, even I haven't figured out exactly what her back-story is yet. I have some ideas of what (and who) I want it to entail, but I don't have anything solidified yet. But anyways, this is how the Queens are chosen.
Um, okay, yeah, the entire reason that the whole dialects thing started at all was because of France. Do you KNOW how hard it is for me to NOT have France say something in French?! I CAN'T HANDLE IT! ! ! ! DX
And of course, if I'm going to have Britain married to Elizabeth I in Cardverse, I think it's only logical that I have France married to Jeanne, yes? (and no, I'm not planning on letting Jeanne die anytime soon) This chapter is another example of what I was saying about some relationships not being the same because clearly America and Canada are not brothers in this universe (but it was so freaking perfect that Canada was already listed as a Diamond! XD). Also, um, yes, I'm finally admitting it for the first time ever I think. I do ship me some FraSwiss somewhat and it just… felt okay to imply it here, especially given that it's France. I also wanted to show, or at least imply, that even though France is promiscuous, it doesn't bother Jeanne at all because she knows he truly loves her, and I wanted her to have this mentality because in France, it's not really a big deal like it is here in the US if a man or a woman has an extramarital affair.
Kudos to anyone who recognized the 'Sun King' reference from French history.
There are also some family headcanons of mine going on here. France's mother is Gaul (I think a lot of people agree on that one though), and I implied that with the Gallia, but I don't know how many people would know that Gallia is the same as Gaul just Latinized (and Massalia is the old name for the current city of Marseille; it's very old). Monaco is France's older sister (I read something related to Gaul being defeated by Rome and that was around the time that 'Monoecus' [Monaco] came into existence, so I'm sticking to that) and the Francia mentioned here is an ode to when the Frankish Empire was split into West Francia (which would become France) and East Francia which eventually led into the formation of the Holy Roman Empire and so enters my headcanon that East Francia is HRE's/Germany's mother (you people can blame Patrick Seitz for saying "That was my mother's cup, you fool!" on the Hetalia WS bloopers for the English dub, because that's literally what started my researching on potential family lineages).