It was musty and dank in the upper floors. Remus fumed and thumped from one room to the next, disturbing the dust and leaving socken-feet footprints through the halls. The dust itself didn't seem to mind, flittering as it was and refilling the gaps without a care.
The upper floors had been Sirius' parents' domain. It was apparent by the antiques and classical tastes. No parent in their right mind would put priceless antique furniture in the rooms of teenaged wizards and expect it to survive for the next generation.
Wolf eyes keeping the darkness sharp, Remus stalked around the hall, idly turning over books and papers without much thought. Slowly, his anger at Severus' father abated. He knew that he was unaware of most of Snape's pain from his father, but that didn't stop him from hating a man he never knew.
No doubt Severus' upbringing and hellish times at school had created the bitter, sardonic wizard he knew at the present.
A scowling picture of Sirius' whole family was hung neatly on the wall. Mrs. Black and Mr. Black were standing stiffly next to each other, glaring out of the picture at him. Regulus stood smirking smartly beside his mother, his eyes kept trailing across to the torn section of the photo where Sirius had once been. Remus took it up in his hands and scowled at the trio. He cracked the frame between his palms and watched in sick glee as the 'happy family' shrieked silently before he set it on fire.
Broken glass prickled at his palms, cutting through the calluses and making scratches in his skin. It was nothing he wouldn't heal from in a matter of hours, ill or not.
Feeling marginally better, he decided to roam through the rest of the upstairs and destroy random items of the Black family that he knew Sirius would not want.
...oOo...
Sirius took to sitting in his rooms doing what he hadn't done since his years at Hogwarts. He was studying.
He checked on Severus regularly, the wizard had fallen into a restless sleep shortly after being put back into bed. Now and then a smash rang from the floor above him, or the sound of something heavy and solid slamming into a wall. Twice he stood wanting to storm up the stairs and shake Remus, but he refrained when he saw it was not bothering Snape. Whatever the wolf was doing must be partially cathartic.
The book he was thumbing through was part of Snape's collection. A rather wordy, if not informative, volume from Russia. The names of the people gave it away. Natasha, Renati, Mikhail; a family of lycans. Reading about the mating of these people was a bit much, but sicknesses they suffered and how they overcame them were intriguing. It seemed Snape had gotten at least some of his ideas from the book and tweaked them with his potions expertise.
Low, keening groans filtered through his comprehension. The book clacked shut when he realized it was coming from Remus' rooms.
"Snape?" Sirius pushed the door open and saw that the potions master had tangled himself in the sheets.
At first, he thought the man sleeping, but when he got within a pace of the bed he saw that Severus' eyes were open. Onyx eyes glittering in pain bore hard into his, but he hadn't the ability to speak through his clenched teeth. Snape curled his long fingers into claws, scratching at his chest and arms, arching off of the bed in pain.
"Jesus, stop!" Sirius panicked, lunging across the bed and trying to pry Snape's hands away.
Bloody furrows were already scratched across his neck; a particularly nasty one down his chest where he had torn a button from his top. Snape's mouth opened but the only sound to come free was a long, "Hhhhhhhhhhhh--" that ended in a moan.
The clawed hands grabbed hold of Sirius' upper arms, digging in painfully and nearly pinching the meat from his bones. "Easy!" Sirius hissed, unwilling to let go of Snape but not wanting to get dug to bloody ribbons either. "Moony!" He yelled toward the open door, literally climbing on top of the potions master to pin his bowing body down.
There was no sound from upstairs and Sirius clenched his eyes shut a moment. "Remus Jonathan Lupin, HELP ME!"
Immediately following his frantic shriek, the sound of stumbling footsteps and a slamming door came from the third level. Sirius didn't have the time to be relieved since Severus hissed through his teeth and broke free of his hold to dig mercilessly at his chest again.
Remus came thudding hard down the stairs and bound into the doorway just as Sirius took a face full of Snape's scratching hand. Three deep scratches began to bleed across his cheek and chin.
"Severus!" Remus barked, heaving Sirius from the dark wizard and taking his place.
Sirius sat in stunned silence where he had fallen to the floor. Blood dribbled down his chin and dripped onto his tee shirt. Remus had thrown himself flat across Snape's body, holding the other down with his strength by clutching at the mattress with bare fingers.
The two of them bucked and grunted and Sirius got an odd urge to look away in embarrassment, as though he were watching a private, lewd moment, before he came back to himself.
"What can I do?" Sirius stood, bending over Remus until he could see his friend's dust-streaked face.
"Downstairs," Remus grunted, pinning Snape's arms to his sides and clamping his legs around Snape's, locking his ankles to hold the wizard as tightly as possible. "Calming draught!"
"Right," Sirius repeated the words like a mantra in his head as he barreled headfirst down the stairs. His hands shook terribly as he thumbed through the cabinet, cursing Snape for his awful handwriting. He snatched a vial up, nearly dropping it in his haste and juggled it precariously for an eternity of nanoseconds before securing his grip and running up the stairs again.
Remus was as he had left him, face pressed into Severus' shoulder and holding the man tightly with all of his limbs. "Got it!" He skidded to a halt beside the two of them and cracked the vial open.
"Hold on," Remus mumbled, though whether to Snape or Sirius, the animagus didn't know for sure. The lycan loosed one hand and gripped Severus' jaw, pinching his fingers into the tendons.
Snape reflexively opened his mouth at the pain and Sirius poured the potion down his throat. After a moment of sputtering and another minute of Snape writhing, the potions master began to calm.
Remus was whispering something that Sirius couldn't hear as Snape calmed. Severus' eyes glazed and his death hold on Remus' arms went lax until he lay panting and defeated.
Tendons squeaking, Remus flexed his fingers, then his arms as he rolled off of the darker wizard. Sirius was looking anxious and pale beside him.
"Merlin, Padfoot, what's happened to your face?" Remus stood with a pop and frowned.
Sirius raised a hand to his face, wincing as his fingers found the deep scratches. His fingertips were stained in blood. "Snape," he said simply. "What was..." he waved a hand at Severus, unable to articulate what he had just been through, "that?"
"The first pain of transformation," Remus lamented, eyes narrowed and haunted.
Severus sighed deeply and let a single, muted sob escape him as he rolled onto his side. Remus spread his blankets straight again and lay a hand on the man's forehead. "That should help for a while," he muttered, running his bruised knuckles across Snape's cheekbone.
"Come on," Sirius said quietly, tugging at Remus' sleeve. After a moment, the wolf followed him.
Sirius walked back to his room, vaguely registering that Remus was following. His mind was buzzing and his face stung. He pulled his bloody tee shirt over his head and pressed it to his face while shuffling toward the bathroom.
Once he cleaned them up a bit, they weren't so bad. He should probably take something for them so that Snape didn't feel guilty... Since when did that matter? He thought with a snort. He decided against it though once Snape's tortured spasms came back into his mind. He would save the healing draughts for Snape and Moony.
He came out of the room to find Remus had sat on his bed, book open in his hands. He smiled a bit, "Don't lose my place," he quipped, turning to his stack of clothing for a close-to-clean shirt.
"I won't," Remus replied, a smile in his voice. The bed creaked and Sirius startled as Remus' cold fingers touched his shoulder. "What happened?"
"Hmm?" Sirius furrowed his brow, looking down where Remus was still gently prodding. A dark bruise was under the wolf's fingers, running from the ball of his shoulder to nearly half his upper arm. There were pink crescent marks from Snape's fingernails, but he knew that wasn't what Remus was referring to. He remembered then and turned a quick glance up to Remus' face. "It's nothing."
"It can't have been nothing," Remus sputtered, "That's a nasty bruise, surely you remember."
Sirius shrugged Remus' hand off and pulled his shirt on, thankful that it covered the damage entirely. "Never mind," Sirius told him a bit sternly.
"For God's sake, Sirius," Remus huffed, looking annoyed and angry.
"It was you, alright?!" Sirius snapped, instantly regretting it. Remus drew back as if struck and gaped at him. "It's nothing," he tried to soothe, though Remus didn't look very comforted.
The wolf was staring at his feet, mind whirring as he tried to remember and couldn't.
Sirius hugged him, holding tighter as Remus stiffened, "It doesn't matter. It's nothing."
"Excuse me," Remus pushed out of the comforting hold and left the room, shutting the door behind him. Sirius ran a hand down his face and sighed.
He heard another door shut in the hall and knew without checking that Remus was in his rooms with Snape. Perfect. Tying his hair back, Sirius made his way down the hall to the stairs, sparing a glance to the closed doorway that led into Moony's bedroom. He ignored it and went to the kitchen to start Molly's stew.
...oOo...
Severus slept for another hour, Remus sat and watched him the entire time. The potions master's face was pinched in pain as he slept. Remus was waiting for him to wake up in spasms again.
He could hear Sirius downstairs fumbling in the kitchen and tried to tune it out. He couldn't place the emotions that burned in his stomach. Sirius had been so furious when he finally cracked. He had never heard such accusation in the tone of Sirius' voice before. It made his heart shatter. He wasn't sure if it was Sirius, or his own lack of attention and the fact that he had hurt someone he loved.
Snape grunted and turned onto his side, but resettled into sleep again. Remus watched him, forgetting Sirius with a valiant effort. There were nasty scratches across Snape's neck and chest. The potions master would do much worse to himself before it was over.
Idly, Remus ran his fingers across his face and found the faint scars there. They had healed well and faded after time. The only place to truly see them was just under his chin where the flesh was softer and took the damage the hardest. His mother had found him the next morning and screamed. He didn't blame her when he thought back on it. There had been so much blood, no doubt she believed he had torn out his own jugular in the night.
He heard Severus shift and stood up, knowing instinctively that the man was coming to for another round. Within seconds, Severus' eyes snapped open, wide and fogged with pain. The potions master's hands curled to hooks before the first scream ripped from his chest.
"Easy, Severus," Remus cooed, though it was doubtful the man could hear him. He nearly lept onto the bed--and Severus. The dark wizard buried both hands into his hair and tugged mercilessly. Remus tried to pry the fingers out before Snape pulled chunks of his sable hair out at the root. "Come on, Severus, come on..."
One hand came away and nearly tore half of Lupin's cheek off. Remus jerked his head back out of reach, quelling a sudden urge to bite the offending hand, and clamped his arms tight around Snape's chest again. He managed to pin the loose arm, but the other was still tangled into Snape's hair.
The lycan began to mumble nonsensical things into Severus' ear. They were cooing, calming sounds and he wished the lanky man wasn't nearly as wiry-strong as he appeared or he might have been able to free one hand to stroke his hair.
Slowly, over a length of ten minutes, Severus calmed and Remus was shocked to hear a painful croak of, "Thank you, Lupin," as Severus finally relaxed back into the mattress.
Remus sat up onto his elbows, releasing Snape and staring down at him from inches away. The man's onyx eyes were half-lidded with fatigue and dull as Remus had ever seen them. "You're welcome," he muttered, feeling Snape's panted breath on his face.
"I don't mean to interrupt, but lunch is finished," Sirius said stiffly from the doorway.
Remus glanced over his shoulder, expecting a pinched, angry face and was hurt and confused at the calm, masked look Sirius returned to him.
"Don't worry, I didn't make it," Sirius told them with the same careful tone. The tray he carried was set down on the dresser. There were only two bowls on it. Remus shuffled off of the bed, careful not to knee Severus or otherwise jolt him.
"Are you up to eating?" He looked back down at Snape. The man was nearly asleep again.
"You should rouse him enough to have some. It's mostly broth anyway," Sirius was staring hard at him. Remus felt gooseflesh rise on his skin.
He turned back to Snape, helping the man sit up a bit and making sure he was fine before he turned to retrieve their late lunch. Sirius had already gone without a word.
His shattered heart felt ground together and stomped underneath Sirius' foot. Severus ate shakily by himself so long as Remus held the bowl. The potions master was staring at him with his half-dead eyes while he managed to stomach several bites. The spoon dropped back into the bowl too quickly for Remus' likes, but at least Snape had eaten something.
He helped Severus reshift back down into his bedding before he sat down with his own meal, picking sadly at it. He felt like sobbing.
"He's strained," Severus mumbled, eyes closed and hand clenching and unclenching loosely.
"What's that?" Remus blinked, clearing his throat when he realized how fogged with tears it sounded.
"Black," Snape told him with a watered-down sneer.
"Did you need something?" Sirius' head reappeared in the doorway, he held a large vial in one hand and two goblets in the other.
Remus couldn't meet Sirius' eyes and missed the wince on the animagus' face.
"No," Severus croaked, rubbing a hand down his face.
"Right," Sirius frowned, gazing between the two. It was disturbing that his one-time enemy was meeting his gaze with a flat, bland one and his best friend wouldn't look at him at all. "Albus sent this over," he held up the vial.
Severus struggled to sit up, snarling at Lupin when the man attempted to help him up. "I am not a child," he growled. Remus didn't answer, only sat down in a larger funk and wouldn't look at either man.
Remus couldn't help looking up when the vial was uncorked and a familiar stench wafted at him. Wolfsbane was being poured between the two goblets. It was thick and nearly colorless.
"Here Moony," Sirius said softly, handing one of the goblets over. Remus felt his heart pinch at the nickname and took the glass with both hands. Sirius offered him a pained, small smile and sat down next to Snape. "Here, just as you ordered."
"What?" Remus blinked, finally realizing that Sirius was going to have Snape drink a dose of Wolfsbane.
Snape took the glass in both hands, but still shook badly enough that Sirius helped him. Severus glared over the rim but drank the contents without a fuss. He gagged a bit and coughed when he was finished.
"You see, it truly is vile," Sirius grinned weakly, trying to lighten the suffocating atmosphere.
"I told you it couldn't be helped," Severus croaked, wiping a hand across his mouth.
"Why are you taking a dose of Wolfsbane?" Remus frowned at both of them as they acted so familiar with each other.
"Just in case," Sirius answered for Snape. Lupin looked beyond his friend to see Severus was nodding his agreement. It was a precaution, even he knew it although he refused to acknowledge it.
Sirius was humming while Remus sized up Severus. It was terribly awkward to want to have both Sirius and Snape but get worked up and jealous when it seemed the two of them had shared knowledge that he didn't have.
The animagus stood and went to Lupin's bathroom, apparently on his own mission. He laughed as he turned on the light and it echoed back at them. "I forgot you needed a new sink," Sirius walked back out holding an edge of porcelain.
Remus flushed, trying to sink into his own chair when Severus turned sleepy, curious eyes toward him. He had forgotten about shattering the sink a couple of weeks ago. He hadn't been using his bathroom since and had taken to walking down the hall instead.
"I'll just get it back together for you, shall I?" Sirius frowned, tossing the piece back into the small room. He drew his wand from his pocket and flicked his wrist. "Reparo."
There was a slight tinkling as the pieces reconnected and shifted together. Sirius squatted down to the floor, twisting himself around into position to reach the shut-off valves. His shirt rose on one side, flashing a bit of skin.
Remus pinked a bit and looked away, right at Severus. The potions master was looking curiously at him. To make his paranoia worse, Remus watched the darker wizard sniff delicately twice. The dull haze of his eyes cleared in a blink and a strange current of knowledge was shared between them.
Severus knew.
Lupin cleared his throat and excused himself, taking up their lunch bowls in shaking hands and escaping the room with the tray. He pressed his back to the wall and took several deep breaths to cleanse his racing mind. If Severus had looked at him that way before the bite, he was sure he could have passed it off. However, Severus had been bitten and was currently going through pieces of a lycanthrope change.
The potions master had smelled his arousal.
He nearly dropped the bowls and broke them halfway down the stairs because of his lack of attention. Surely he was only fooling himself. Severus was sick and very clever. Whose to say he hadn't just thought of something new to add to one of his potions?
The dishes were set down carefully in the sink and rinsed in warm water. Remus idly wiped his hands on his pants as he went back up the stairs. He was laughing to himself by the time he made it back to the room. Of course he was only imagining things. It was only because he had looked directly at Severus after ogling Sirius. He was just paranoid, that was all.
Sirius was bent over Snape when he pushed the door open and Remus had to swallow a lump of envy. He skirted around Sirius' protruding rear and sat down in his chair.
"A bit further to the left," Sirius mumbled, helping Severus roll carefully onto his left side. "Perfect."
The animagus sat up sideways, holding Snape in place with one hand and squeezing a rag from a bowl of water with the other. He did a double-take over his shoulder when he noticed Remus had returned.
"Oh good, Remy would you help me?"
Remus blinked in surprise. There was no anger or stiffness to Sirius' face or tone. He smiled a bit at the back of his friends head and realized he should have known better. Even when they were children, Sirius never was able to hold a grudge to him.
"What do you need?" Remus stood up, unsure of where to go.
"Go around and climb up, you're gonna have to hold him down," Sirius said cheerfully. Severus sneered, though he didn't snap anything about hexing Remus if he dared.
Forgetting about his discomfort from earlier because of his natural curiosity, Remus walked around them. It wasn't until he was sitting up beside Severus that he realized Sirius had helped him remove his shirt. He was going to have to hold the man while he was half-naked.
He fought a flush of pink from his face and cleared his throat. "Well?"
"I'm cleaning these," Sirius pointed at the deep scratches with a dripping finger. "The problem is that they're very painful and he nearly goes back into spasms." He grinned over at Remus, "That's where you come in."
"Right," Remus mumbled, uncertain but preparing himself regardless.
Sirius had been right. As soon as the rag touched Severus' skin, the man arched off of the bed and tried to grab at his chest again. Remus latched onto him, pinning Snape's arms behind his back with his right arm threaded through them and his left wrapped snug around his waist.
Sirius continued mechanically, as though Severus weren't on the verge of screaming. Lupin held on as well as he could without fear of hurting Snape more. At one point he had to loop his leg around Severus' as well to keep the potions master from kicking.
"Nearly done," Sirius grunted, catching a stray elbow in the chest.
Remus didn't reply, too busy using his breath to pin Snape down. The rag touched Severus' neck and the potions master tossed his head. His skull struck Remus in the temple, sending sparkling stars in his vision.
The lycan bent his head to Severus', pushing his head aside with his own. His neck was starting to burn and cramp, and the stubble on Snape's cheek was eating into his skin.
"Done," Sirius barked, throwing the rag to the side and helping hold Severus until the man calmed down.
It was almost immediately after Severus sagged between them that he was asleep. Sirius looked down in surprise then over Snape's shoulder to Remus.
The lycan uncurled slowly, flexing his cramped fingers and rubbing absently at his whisker-burned face. "That was fun," he mumbled. Sirius laughed and helped him off of the bed. The animagus didn't release him immediately and Remus fought off color in his face. "Padfoot, I want to apologize for being so difficult lately."
Sirius blinked in surprise, "There's no need to be sorry, Remus."
"I know, I know. I'm sick," Remus grimaced at the familiar phrase. "I just hate not being able to keep in my own head sometimes. I don't want to come out of another funk and realize I've hurt anyone badly." He took hold of Sirius' arm and pushed the shirt sleeve up until he could see the ugly black bruise. "This is too much, Padfoot."
The arm Remus held wound around his shoulder and pulled him into a loose, one-armed hug. "You're getting better, Moony, and I've been through plenty worse than a few rough swats from my best friend."
Remus laughed a little, it was better than sniffling, and drew away. A haunted look had crossed Sirius' face and the wolf actually turned to look over his shoulder to see what the other was looking at. He realized that Sirius was lost in his own thoughts. He touched the animagus' arm and stared seriously at him. "You'll tell me one day?"
"Hmm?" Sirius frowned, blinking away the clouds of his recent past. "One day, Remy," he mumbled, voice thick with emotion.
Remus nodded, unsure of his voice. "We, uh," he cleared his throat and smiled a bit as Sirius looked at him again with clear vision, "We ought to help Snape with some of his toiletries if this is going to be a frequent event."
"Eh?" Sirius blinked, grinning a bit as he caught onto his friends renewed mirth.
"I haven't had a case of beard-stubble burn this badly for quite some time," Remus rubbed absently at his cheek then colored brightly when he realized what he had said--and what it implied.
"Moony," Sirius sputtered, gaping and trying not to laugh. Remus dipped his head and looked up through his swaying bangs. After a moment he grinned and laughed, Sirius joined him.
They giggled--quite unbecoming for full grown men--and snickered into their hands as they tried to calm down and keep from disturbing Snape. They calmed down over time, still grinning wide and hiccoughing into their fists.
"Right," Sirius croaked between a spatter of fading giggles. "So what do we do?"
"Shave him?" Remus shrugged. Unbidden an image of Severus with his head tipped back and he or Sirius dragging a straight-edged razor carefully up the dark wizard's throat. His mouth went dry and he blinked twice before returning to the present. Sirius was giving him a calculating, half-knowing look that made him blush again. "What?" He demanded through his embarrassment.
Sirius grinned and pretended to gag, "My God, Remy that is the most revoltingly overused scenario in all obsessive women's fantasies."
"Are you calling me a woman?" Remus huffed, pretending to be hurt as he followed Sirius back to the animagus' room. Sirius shot him a self-satisfied smirk that reminded Remus so badly of Severus he nearly tackled his friend in the hallway. "Besides, it is a good fantasy."
"Oh, Moony, you have to be more original than that." Sirius shook his head sadly at his friend's lack of imagination. He plopped onto his bed, shuffling backward until he sat Indian-style in the middle.
Remus' eyes glazed for a moment and a slow smirk curled onto his face. Sirius wasn't sure he wanted to know what the wolf was thinking. "Aah, Padfoot, you might be surprised."
Sirius made a face. "You're actually thinking about it. You really weren't kidding about being intrigued with Snape were you?"
Since Sirius appeared sincere and had ceased making a partially disgusted face, Remus bit his lip and considered how to answer. He didn't want to tell Sirius yes and dampen any future 'possibilities' in case he really decided to take a taste of dog flesh instead.
"It's rather complicated," Remus said slowly as he tried his best to puzzle out an answer to sate them both. "I wasn't kidding, Padfoot. I wonder sometimes how things would be, if it would be worth the trouble. But that's just my own reaching fantasies." A wave of self-depreciation fogged the fun mood he had shared with Sirius only moments ago. Not that anyone would want an old werewolf, he thought bitterly.
"Moony, don't," Sirius pouted. He waggled his fingers out to Remus until he reluctantly crossed the room close enough for Sirius to snag a hold of his pant's pocket. The animagus tugged none-too-gently until Remus sat down.
"Don't what?" Lupin sighed, sitting stiff and uncomfortable at the edge of the bed.
"You got that look again," Sirius told him while shuffling around on the bed. He pulled his legs out from beneath him and sat down next to Remus. "That same one you used to get at school when James would talk about Lily, or I talked about anyone I was seeing."
"Bragged about, you mean."
Sirius rolled his eyes. "Bragged about, then. Only you didn't look so bitter and defeated then." The animagus stopped there, casting sidelong glances at Remus. He didn't want the wolf to get angry with him. They'd only just gotten back to normal again.
"Never mind, Sirius," Remus muttered, turning his face toward the far wall and taking an interest in the peeling wallpaper.
It was uncomfortably quiet. Remus chose to ignore Sirius moving about again, even as he dipped back and forth with the man's shifting weight. He nearly jumped out of his skin when Sirius sidled up behind, resting his chin on Lupin's shoulder and sitting close enough that Remus was nested between his legs.
It was hard not to melt back into the heat but Remus did his best not to.
"We talked about this a couple of weeks ago, didn't we? You're worthy of affection, Moony. You've just got to stop being worried about what people might think and listen to what they do think." Sirius spoke stern and soft, absently holding a bit tighter.
Remus had never felt so comfortable and utterly destroyed in his entire life. Sirius stayed wrapping Lupin like a fleshy blanket. If he knew about the shattered interior of Remus' psyche, he didn't show it.
"Sirius you don't know what it's like--"
"I don't," Sirius interrupted. "But Severus has been bitten, and he knows the in's and out's of your other side. I bet he can understand your darker half better than some other wolves even."
Remus blinked owlishly at the cracked wall in front of him. "Are you telling me to go after Severus?" He whispered.
Sirius let him go and scooted back slowly until they no longer touched. "Maybe you should."
"You don't know what you're saying," Remus muttered, standing up and going to the door. He glared over his shoulder at Sirius. "I'd appreciate it if you'd stop pretending you know what's best for me Sirius. I've been living for twelve years without your imperious advice, and I'm still alive."
Sirius gaped at his doorway where Remus disappeared and slammed the door so soundly the wood frame cracked.
Remus stormed back to his room, momentarily forgetting that Severus was currently residing in his bed. He kicked his door shut and spun around, swearing and slapping himself in the forehead.
Snape rolled onto his back, glaring beneath his curtain of hair. "Have your tantrum elsewhere," he rasped, shaking with effort as he tried to sit up.
Lupin offered him an arm, frowning at the amount of heat that seeped into his shirt. "You still have a fever," he told no one in particular.
"How utterly unfantastic," Severus murmured, wiggling his way toward the edge of the bed. "Help me to the bathroom," he demanded.
The wolf laughed short and helped him stand. Severus pushed away from him in the doorway and walked the rest of the way himself into the restroom. Remus stayed lingering there until Snape came shuffling back out again.
"Bed," the man blurted, holding out an arm to be taken.
"You seem to have gotten used to the help about," Lupin took the offered arm and guided Severus back around and tucked him in.
"What other choice do I have?" Snape grumbled. "You'll do it either way, I may as well make it a demand and take some of the shame out of it."
"There's nothing to be ashamed of," Remus told him softly. Severus snorted and relaxed back into the mattress. The wolf stared down at him, thinking idly about what Sirius had said. It had been true for the most part. Severus would know better than most what it was like to be one of the dregs of society, to be feared and hated for no real reason. What Sirius said had stung, as though he himself were too pure and good. Damn the man.
"What are you looking at?" Snape yawned, half asleep.
"You," Remus smiled a bit, suddenly nervous.
"Haven't you had your fill yet?" Severus snorted.
"I guess not," Lupin admitted. Suddenly, before he could think about it, he bent forward and pressed his dry, cracked lips to Severus'. The potions master went rigid beneath him. Remus sat up, flushing crimson.
"Lupin," Severus' voice cracked. He paused to swallow and clear his throat. "Don't do that again."
"I'm sorry Severus," Remus whispered, heart clenched and bleeding into his chest.
The potions master struggled to sit up. Remus offered him a hand but Snape shot him a dark, forbidding look and the wolf drew away, stung. Finally, after too much exertion, Severus stood on his wavering feet and drew the door open.
"I'll return to my rooms," Severus stared out into the hall, unable to look at the werewolf. "Forgive me for intruding."
Lupin waffled in the room, watching Severus stagger across the hall and fumble into his own dark rooms. The door shut though once Snape was through and he was left alone.
He sank to his knees and couldn't dredge up enough energy to weep. He was damned, and now he had estranged Severus again.